FF #166 prompt: At the Stroke of Midnight
Now or Never
He did tell her that she could change her mind… again. She just didn't think that it would take so long for her mind to catch up with her heart.
For years she had feelings for him. Her feelings started out as simply plutonic. He helped her out, listened to her when no one else would. But as the time they spent together grew, so did her feelings for him. When she finally let herself admit that she wanted more from Jason, something was holding her back. More like someone was holding her back.
Lucky.
And look where loving Lucky got her, walking the docks of Port Charles, alone, in the middle of the night. A bitter smile reached her lips as she hugged her leather jacket tighter around her body. It wasn't a cold night, but the tightness of the jacket gave her a type of comfort that held her together.
She had given up so much in her life loving Lucky. Elizabeth would never regret the time they spent together before everyone thought he died in that fire. But when he came back from the dead nearly a year later, he came back as someone else. At the time Elizabeth would have done anything for him to be the Lucky she loved and remembered.
As a wave splashed against the docks, she realized that that was her first mistake. She tried to make Lucky into the boy she had fallen in love with at the age of fifteen. She tried to change him, had wasted years on her attempts.
Slowing her steps, Elizabeth stared out into the starless night sky musing over her realization. Light began to find its way back into her dim eyes as she finally realized that she was over Lucky. She had tried for so many months to finally feel free of Lucky. When she walked down the aisle towards him on their wedding day that wasn't, she felt… content. When she looked into his eyes and looked deep within him, she found no love for her. At that moment, Elizabeth thought her whole world fell apart.
A slight gust of wind blew a piece of her hair into her face. But she was wrong; her world had just begun that day. Closing her eyes, Elizabeth tilted her head back and let a real smile grace her nude lips. Too bad it took her finding him in bed with her sister to finally realize that Lucky had set her free that day.
Free to be… what?
A small frown replaced her smile as she looked back out into the murky waters of Port Charles. Did it really matter what he set her free to? She was free of her obligation to Lucky, free of his hold he had on her. It was odd to think that Lucky had a hold on her for years. But it was true. To her it was a hold that kept her from being free, but to him it was their Permanent Lock.
She didn't hate him. She never could. Lucky had been everything to her at one time and it was her own fault that she had latched onto that feeling for so long she couldn't see past it. She was still pissed at him for sleeping with her sister. But it was her sister that she was even angrier with. How could someone who claimed to want a real sister relationship betray her like that?
Elizabeth had made her way towards the staircase of the docks and even made it to the top step before she stopped dead in her tracks. What did it matter? Both of them had done something that opened Elizabeth's eyes so wide that she realized she could finally breathe. They had hurt her by lying to her and going behind her back. But that didn't matter to her anymore. Sarah and Lucky-crazy enough-gave her a gift earlier that night when she found them together.
It would take a long time for her to forgive or even talk to either one, but by them sleeping together, Elizabeth was able to finally look back at her life and realize her mistakes.
The main one being Jason.
Her pace quickened as she walked down the dark sidewalk. A twinge of guilt twisted her stomach as she let her thoughts linger back to Jason. She had hurt him the last time he was in town. He had opened up to her and let his venerability towards her show for the first time she could remember. He had offered her the light in Italy, and she turned him down. When she walked away from him that night in the park, walking away from his out-stretched hand, she ignored the pain in his eyes. She ignored the wrinkle his forehead created and flash of pain that crossed his face as he dropped his hand wishing her happiness without him. She had to ignore it at the time. If she let herself think about the pain she caused him, she would have turned around and flew into his arms begging him to take her away. She had to ignore the hurt because of the promises she had made.
Promises she now knew where empty and a waste of time.
Moisture made its way to her eyes as she tried to hold back the pain of that day. It was so long ago, she couldn't do anything to change that day. She couldn't turn back time and grab a hold of his hand like she wanted so badly to do. Nothing could change what she did that day, but it still hurt.
She had made so many mistakes with Jason then. Not taking his hand, pulling back when he tried to kiss her…
A car horn blared bringing her back to the present. Her startled gaze flew to the white car that was inches away from her. Her cheeks turned pink as she yelled "Sorry!" and ran across the street out of the cars way. It wasn't smart for her to be lost in her thoughts as she walked across the street wearing her black leather jacket, tight black pants, and black tank top. But once her boot covered feet reached the safety of the sidewalk again, Elizabeth let her mind drift back to Jason.
Her cheeks that were glowing with embarrassment seconds ago were now glowing with desire. She had made a fool of her self hours ago. Throwing her self at Jason, pushing him towards her couch ready to have sex with him because of her anger.
But no matter how angry she was when she and Jason first walked into her studio, once their lips met in that fiery kiss, nothing went through her mind except for how wonderful he felt against her.
His lips were soft and full against hers. She knew that others perceived him as heartless and made out of stone. But to her, he was always gentle and beautiful. Shaking her head, the faint smile that appeared on her face grew bigger. If she had ever mentioned that she thought of Jason as beautiful to anyone else, they would probably look at her as if she had gone mad. Men like Jason were defined as sexy and strong. Even though Jason filled those categories one hundred and ten percent, he was still beautiful to her.
Turning the corner, the neon lights came into view. Her heart began to speed as she realized that she was almost there.
Her steps began to slow as she began to lose her nerve. Was she crazy for walking all that way in the middle of the night to see him? Would he welcome her in, or would he shut the door in her face?
Her pace became so slow it was almost as if she weren't walking at all. As her mind began to ask question after question, she paused it all and thought back again to earlier that night in her studio. Jason would never judge her, it just wasn't him. He didn't judge her when she placed her hand upon his chest claiming that she wanted him. And although she kissed him because she was furious, her statement still rang truth.
She did want him, had wanted him for so long. Even though the kiss-that still tingled her lips when she thought about it-started as something else, it instantly turned into something more. The second Jason brought his hands to cup her face, Elizabeth had melted into him.
All of the past almost kisses could not have made her imagine their first kiss being that good. It was like their lips were made for each others, like they had a mind of their own. Their lips danced together as if they had met many times before. Just as their lips melted and moved together, so did their bodies. Elizabeth still couldn't grasp the fact of how perfect their bodies moved together as they began to strip each other of their jackets and explored each others bodies.
A shiver ran up her spine as goose bumps appeared on her arms. Nothing could erase the memory of Jason moving his lips over hers, down her neck, and across her shoulder as he lowered the strap of her black top. A warming sensation began to brew low in her stomach as she looked back on the way they moved towards her couch, never separating their lips.
But she had stopped it. As much as she wanted Jason and wanted to be with him, in that moment, it wasn't the right time. And just like he didn't judge her when she kissed him, he didn't judge her when she leaped off of his lap apologizing profusely for her actions.
He was right, like always, they were both adults and they both knew what was really going on.
Not even realizing it until her hand closed around the cool steel of the door, Elizabeth had made it to the entrance of the building. Frowning, she looked back towards the parking lot and then back towards the door in front of her. How did she make it there so fast? It was only moments ago that she had just rounded the corner, seeing the building she now stood in front of in the distance.
Shrugging her shoulders, Elizabeth turned the handle and pushed the heavy door open. Thick smoke assaulted her vision the second she stepped foot in the bar. The stench of sweaty men and stale beer lingered in the air as she made her way towards the stair case in the back. She didn't look around the bar, never even thought about saying hello to the bartender who had always been friendly to her. She had one thing in mind, and as she took the first step on the stairs, she realized that it was now or never.
Within seconds, Elizabeth found herself standing in front of Jason's door at Jakes. When he left her in her studio, she had plans of painting and ridding her mind of all things but her art. Jason had always inspired her art, but as she set up her easel and searched through her supplies, she couldn't focus.
When she reached for her sky blue paint, she thought about how Jason's eyes reflected the sky better than the color she held in her hand. When she picked up her canvas that she planned on using, she remembered that it was the one Jason held telling her to rip it up in her anger. And when she tried to think of something to paint, her mind went straight to Jason. She thought about painting him on his bike, maybe even painting the picture she sketched of him playing pool, or maybe she could paint a portrait of him. She thought about his angular face, the way his face made him appear so strong, but one look into his eyes and his entire face became soft. At the thought of his eyes, Elizabeth gave up all hope of painting. All the shades of blue that she had could never appear as beautiful as his eyes.
She raised her right hand in a fist and lightly knocked on his door. Even though she had wanted him more than anything in the moment their lips had first touched, she was glad that she stopped it at the time. It wasn't the right time for them, she was thinking of other things, using him as an escape. But after her walk outside along the docks, Elizabeth realized that she had changed her mind.
Not just on the decision to finally give into her need to be with Jason physically, but more so to be with him emotionally. She had so many thoughts about how she needed time on her own, time away from any type of relationship. But when Jason walked out of her door telling her that he was glad to be back in town, she realized that she didn't have all of the time in the world. Who knew what was planned for her. Jason was back, she was free of Lucky physically, mentally, and emotionally, and she had finally gained the courage to claim what she wanted.
Several moment passed by and Jason still hadn't answered his door. Knocking again, Elizabeth thought that he might have been sleeping. Normally she would have felt bad about waking him up, but she didn't think she would have the nerve to say this in the morning.
"Jason, its Elizabeth." Knocking again, a little harder this time, Elizabeth waited.
Pressing her ear to the door, she heard nothing. Closing her eyes in disappointment, she realized he was still on his bike ride.
Looking down at her watch as she made her way back towards the stairs; Elizabeth realized that it was ten minutes until midnight. Jason had left her studio three hours ago. Knowing Jason, Elizabeth realized that he could be gone for another four.
Stopping, she turned around and cast one last glance at his door. Maybe she could sit in the hallway and wait for him to come back. As soon as that thought entered her head, Elizabeth shook it away with an amused laugh. Earlier Jason had mentioned how they were both adults, if he found her camped out in front of his door; he would defiantly be rethinking his declaration that she was an "adult."
She rounded the corner and was about to make her way down the staircase when she bumped into a very strong and familiar body. Lifting her gaze Elizabeth found herself staring into the sparkling and surprised eyes that had tortured her earlier.
"Elizabeth? What… what are you doing here?"
Not even answering Jason's question, Elizabeth's gaze lowered from his eyes to another part of his body that tortured her, his lips. They were slightly parted in question. Looking back into his eyes, Elizabeth lifted both hands to cup his face. Her thumbs rubbed back and forth across his cheek bones as she stared straight into his eyes, never uttering a word. He was on a step below her, making their height almost the same, and as she inched forward hesitating only slightly to see if he would pull back, Elizabeth was glad for that. She didn't have to tug his head down to meet hers, all she had to do was move forward slightly and their lips would be connected.
When Jason made no move to meet her halfway or pull back, Elizabeth decided to take control and close the small gap that separated them. Once their lips met, Jason finally snapped out of his surprise and participated. His strong hands closed around Elizabeth's waist pulling her flush against him as he deepened the kiss.
Elizabeth had no problem opening her mouth to him as he demanded entrance. Her arms moved around his neck as her hands dove into his short hair. One of his hands was firmly placed on the small of her back, pulling her even closer to him as his other arm circled around her in a tight embrace allowing his hand to slide through her soft hair that he loved.
Neither wanted to stop the kiss, but the need to breath took over and at the same time both pulled away sucking in much needed oxygen. Both still tightly held onto the other as their foreheads touched.
Pulling her head back slightly so that she could look into his eyes, Elizabeth smiled when he hugged her tighter, not wanting her to leave his arms. Her hands played with the small hairs at the nape of his neck as one of his brushed her hair out of her face.
"I changed my mind," tilting her head to the side, her bruised lips from his kiss formed a bright smile.
It took Jason a split second to realize what Elizabeth had meant, and when he did, she could see the recognition enter his eyes. She was so busy studying his eyes, that a loud yelp escaped her lips when Jason snaked one arm underneath her legs and picked her up in his arms as if she weighed nothing.
She threw her head back and laughed at the carelessness Jason was showing. Her laughter died in her throat when she felt his warm lips graze her collar bone and then her throat right at her pulse point. A groan of protest escaped her lips as he removed his lips in order to concentrate on opening his door with her still in his arms. Once his door was unlocked, Jason turned the knob and entered with Elizabeth still safely in his arms and their lips fused together.
At the stroke of midnight, Jason kicked his door shut and finally-after years of waiting- had all of Elizabeth to him self.