well... i let this fanfic go... but here's an unexpected update... hope you enjoy this!
THANKS TO ALL WHO'VE REVIEWED! AND TO THOSE WHO WILL REVIEW! AND TO THOSE WHO JUST READ AND LAUGH!
Please do review so that I know I'm on the right track!
I do not own Naruto.
Chapter 6: Seeing Through It All
Every day he rose from his bed with the promise to have another good day of ramen cooking. After all, he had an image to uphold.
On the other side of the door, he could hear Ayame - sweet child - already up and about, cooking breakfast (not ramen!) and getting ready for another day of work at the famous -
ICHIRAKU RAMEN SHOP!
Still... when one is famous, it's hard to keep up the image...
Well... it wasn't like today was super special. There were no festivals on - nor exams. No Kage was visiting.
It seemed to be shaping up as the usual day of buisness, which goes thusly:
The early morning rush of single Chuunins (especially bachelors) who couldn't cook to save Konoha.
Then, there was a breathing apce of about two hours - to clean up and start preparing for the inveitable LUNCH RUSH!
And what a lunch rush it was!
It began wwith the usual small trickle -
People came in at 11:30 - the regularly silent ANBU, some of the Academy teachers and tired out Chuunins gang-pressed into mission desk duty. These people didn't want to deal with the crowds of cross, jumpy, bat-shit crazy Jounins who came in later on.
Then at 12:00, the carpenters, farmers, merchants and tradesment came and went quickly - avoiding the cranky Chuunin, creepy ANBU and the expected crowds of cross, jumpy, bat-shit crazy Jounins.
At 12:20, came the shinobi: Tsunade-sama (busy escaping Shizune), Koharu-sama, Iwashi-kun, Ebisu-san -
And last but not least -
Hatake-sama.
He had sat down and ordered a bowl of miso - his usual.
A medium bowl of miso soup.
Tsunade's eye twitched at the sight of the extra-large helping sete before her subordinate.
So that's how he lives - sponging off people -
Her eyes widened comically at the sight of the Ramen Shop owner and the girl peering at her Number One Jutsu Technician -
What the hell...
"Something's up..." Jiraiya said suddenly behind Tsunade.
Tsunade covered her jump by bring her fist down with a crash onto the counter.
The ramen owner gulped at the miniscule cracks forming...
"Like what? The new security I put up around teh baths?"
"What security?" asked Jiraiya. "You put up security? Ehhh... Didn't notice..."
"DAMMIT!"
"Oi! Calm down, princess!" the Toad Sannin sighed, waving his hands. "I'm talkinga bout something else entirely!"
"Eh?" Tsunade paused. "What the HELL are you talking about? Is it about THEM?"
She pointed out the shop owner and his daughter, standing there with tense expectancy.
Jiraiya blinked.
"What's their problem?"
"I'm asking YOU - because you asked ME."
"Oh no... Not them... it's the - haven't you seen the odd way the Jounin are acting today?"
Kakashi's ear twitched. His finger, pulling down his mask, hesitated 0.0009ths of a second slower than usual.
Ayame and her father's mouths dropped open simultaneously, drool dripping out of the corners of their mouths and hearts in their eyes.
Instead of the 1/4 of a second peek at Kakashi's face, they had received a full 3/4 of asecond view of his totally, indescribable -
Kakashi sweatdropped.
Jiraiya and Tsunade looked disenfranchised.
"Geez... It's Sakumo's trick all over again," Jiraiya sighed.
"Where the hell did that brat learn that? I gotta make it a forbidden jutsu..."
"Ohhhh... You've got a bad nosebleed, granny..."
"Shut up."
"It's going to creep him out..."
"SHUT UP! DAMMIT!"
Kakashi blinked as he settled his chopsticks down on top of his bowl, politely - just as Iruka walked in and sat down beside his superior, looking frazzled - harassed - and slightly scared.
"Ara! It's Kakashi-san - and Iwashi-kun! How's it going?" He tried to smile despite the headache forming above his eyebrows -
It was the burden of all those EYES!
Because, yes, the Ramen Shop was suddenly packed out.
"Hmmmm... what're you going to choose, Sasuke-kun?" asked Ino.
"It's none of your buisness."
"Yeah, Ino. Back off!"
"Make me, forehead girl!"
"You're just behaving like a repulsive PIG!"
"And you're behaving like a -"
"Oi..." Shikamaru put in lazily, slumping onto the counter as he snagged a suddenly endangered stool (there were very few to go around). "Can we not... have... a..."
The Chuunin trailed away at the sight of the girls' whitened, enlarged SCARY EYES.
"Three bowls of beef, pork and chicken ramen!" Naruto waved his hand.
"Same here!" chorused Chouji and Kiba.
"PIG! Eat some vegetables!" yelled Sakura, smacking her partner upside the head.
Naruto whimpered, Chouji and Kiba edged away.
"Yo. Naruto... you need to eat some vegetables or you're never going to get proper nourishment for growth. Seriously," Kakashi put in.
He sighed (inwardly, of course) at the sight of all the Genin, Chuunin and Jounin gathered.
Is it by any chance Ruin-A-Date Day?
Neji's eyes narrowed.
That was...
"Hmmm..."
"What is it, Neji?" whispered Tenten.
Neji backed away into a far away corner and activated his Byukugan.
"What do you see? A bomb? A hidden weapon? A psy? Hinata-chan?"
"No."
The Hyuuga released the jutsu, his mouth trying to keep itself in its regularly angsty pout (but it's just too cute to see!).
"I just saw the dissappointment of a lover," he said rather abruptly.
"Who? Who?" Tenten hissed.
"Hmmmm..."
"Tell me... dammit!"
"Hmmmm..."
"I'll give you a free three-day lesson on a private, all-inclusive weapons targeting class."
"Seven."
"Five."
"Six."
"Six, it is then," Tenten aquiesced with a grin. "So what is it?"
Neji just cocked his head.
"Oh..." Tenten's eyes followed her teammate's gaze to:
Kakashi leaning closely to Iruka, jabbing a finger disdainfully at a piece of shrimp. Iruka, smacking the Jounin's fingers away, with a tiny smile and a mild blush.
"No way..."
Tenten collapsed from sudden blood loss; Neji rushed her out of the door.
"Hey, Neji," Shikamaru called, eyes glinting. "Something come up?"
"Weapon targeting class," Neji said shortly.
"Uhhh... what happened?" asked Naruto.
"It's too troublesome to explain," sighed Shikamaru.
"No clue," Kiba shook his head.
"Who cares?" shrugged Chouji. "More room and food for us."
"It's the beginning of wisdom," hinted Shino darkly.
Everybody blinked.
Everybody: Ooookkkaaayyyy...
"So..." Kurenai whispered to Asuma and Ibiki. "It's a no show, I guess."
"Too bad," Asuma sighed. "Oh well... another day..."
"Hmmm..." Ibiki said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "No show, huh..."
"Yo!" Jiraiya's head suddenly joined the huddle. "What's up? Can I join in the fun? Asuma-kun?"
"Uhhh... sure..."
"So - what's it all about?"
Kotetsu gave the Sannin a whispered sum up of the meager information they had managed to gather.
"So he's accepting bribes?" asked Jiraiya. "Or meeting with a spy?"
"Or perhaps -" Tsuande rolled ehr eyes at her idiotic, ex-teammate. "Perhaps he was just meeting with a parent - or maybe it wasn't Iruka at all?"
"No way - Konohamaru said it was his teacher!"
"Konohamaru, huh. That's what you said, Kurenai?"
"Uhhh... yeah..."
"That little perverted brat - he'd see anything - the way hel ikes to somther himself in breasts -"
Jiraiya, Kotetsu, Izumo, Asuma and Ibiki's eyes were instantly drawn to the low slung kimono on the Kage. And the unending cleavage.
Konohamaru had tasted the delights of -
WAAIIITTTT!
"IDIOTS!" huffed Tsunade, whacking all the men on the head.
"Tsunade!" wailed Shizune, trying to pick up the cracked utensils and bowls - and what was left of teh shop's flags and counter. "Please be calm!"
"Well... that's that," Iruka was saying to Aoba and Ebisu, as he finished up his bowl. "I guess I better get back to the mission desk, huh?"
"I'll walk with you," Kakashi said calmly (amidst the violent fuss of Tsunade, the stuttered apologies of the Jounin to shop owner, and the whimpering of the civilians around the area). "I've got a report to hand in."
"Okay," Iruka shrugged. "The more the merrier!"
Ayame watched the two men walk off, her eyes falling on Kakashi's lingering fingers on Iruka's elbow.
She keeled backward in a daze - eyes woozy.
"Ayama-chan! Ayame-chan! What's wrong?" wailed Naruto. "Is it because we've overworked you? Is it hot back there?"
"Well... there were alot of customers..." Sakura pointed out.
"Idiots..." Sasuke sighed.
What's with the girl's nosebleed...
"That is the beginning of understanding," Shino intoned solemnly - and walked away.
"You know something, Ayame-san?" asked Sasuke, intently.
"Uhhh..." Ayame blushed. "I guess it's so hot back here - I was overcome!"
I can't let anybody know about Hatake-sama's beautiful, heart-throbbing secret! WAHHH! He should be mine! But then - he's so cute around Iruka-kun! I guess it's to be expected. Iruka-sensei is a good hearted person. It's no wonder that Hatake-sama would smile only for him... MOE!
"Okay..." Sasuke spun on his heels and left.
"Hey! Where are you going?" asked Sakura and Ino (at the same time).
"Away from all this stupidity, idiots. It's boring now that Iruka-sensei's gone."
"But we still have to figure it out!"
"I think that's enough trailing for today," Ibiki said kindly (but didn't succeed since the Genins merely inched away from him even more). "I think Iruka-sensei needs a break, ne?"
"AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" The Genins screamed. "He's smiling!"
They disappeared in a cloud of smoke.
"Good work, Ibiki!" Tsunade smiled. "This sure clears the air. Now we can get down to buisness."
"Ah! Yes. I've been meaning to talk to you about ANBU recruitment and border duties -"
"No, no... something more important than that!"
"Eh?"
"Who's dating Iruka-sensei!"
All the Jounins sighed.
"What did you do?" Kurenai asked Asuma. "Now there's no stopping them."
That night, Ayame was settling down for the night, when her father passed by her bedroom door.
"Today was good for buisness... and just when we thought we were entering the quiet season!" Her father smiled. "It's great. How do you feel? Do you still feel faint? Perhaps you should rest up - or go on vacation or something?"
"Uhh... I'm okay. I'm happy about the buisness..."
"I sense a 'but'..."
"But... I found out today that Hatake-sama's heart is taken."
"Ohhhh... so that's what all those people were whispering about? Iruka-sensei was wondering."
"No... they were whispering about Iruka-sensei finding an unknown lover."
"Don't tell me there's a connection."
"Yeah... but... I didn't say anything - because I think Hatake-sama is a private person. He hasn't said anything to anybody else... so... I'm keeping it a secret."
"You've got a good heart, Ayame-chan. Don't worry. There's somebody out there for you!"
"Hmmmm... but you should have seen them together, father... It was just too much for a girl to bear!"
Crawling into his bed with visions of his favorite customers - Iruka-sensei and Hatake-sama - together, dancing in his head, the IchiRaku Ramen shop owner couldn't help but sigh.
It really is too much for a man to bear.
And he nursed a nosebleed all night long.
------
WHAT DO YOU THINK? BAD? GOOD?
So far the people who've figured it out:
Shikamaru
Genma
Raido
Neji
Tenten
Ayame
Ayame's father
Chouji (he understands that Shikamaru knows and doesn't care)
Shino