Just a little something to get me into a writing mood again. Sorry it's so long. I couldn't find a place to break it. Enjoy! Happy New Year!

Disclaimer: I don't own Cats...but if they were actual cats, I would want to own Munkustrap...

Sibling Rivalry

Bombalurina tapped her snoozing sister on the shoulder. Demeter lifted her weary head, blinking her eyes at the daylight. The audacity of being woken up in the middle of the afternoon made the gold and black queen scowl at her sister. Demeter had just gotten to the part of her dream where she jumps into a pile of freshly laundered clothes, and was about to curl up and go to sleep in the heated cotton and fleece. (It was the best when a cat could dream about falling asleep.) So she felt the dirty look she was giving to her sister was warranted. But Bombalurina ignored her sister and pointed her paw over to the scene unfolding before them.

Munkustrap was trudging our from around a corner, followed by a frazzled looking Maine Coon known to all as the Rum Tum Tugger. Not being ones to eavesdrop, the queens laid their heads back down and pretended they had not moved an inch since they saw the two toms. They did, however, rotate their ears in order to pick up any stray sound particles floating their way. And if it happened to carry the heated conversation of the two toms, they couldn't help but over hear, then, now could they? After all, they were there, first…

"It's never enough, is it?" began the Rum Tum Tugger, who was following close to the silver tabby's heel. "I do all these things for the tribe, and I never get the least bit of recognition. But when I do ONE thing wrong--"

"When was the last time you did ANTHING for the tribe?" Munkustrap bellowed, stopping short to turn and face the maned tom. The two ended up an inch from the other's face. "I do everything for this tribe! You've never lifted a single digit on that paw of yours to help! Not as long as you don't get anything from it!"

Tugger sneered at the cat before him. "Oh, sure!" he said. "I never do ANYTHING unless I have something in it for me. I only brought back Old Deuteronomy to the tribe!"

Munkustrap glared at the tom, making sure to emphasize each word, "That. Was. Mistoffelees."

"But who suggested it?" Tugger asked, smiling smugly. He brought his paws up in a deliberate fashion to his mane, before fluffing it in Munkustrap's face, causing the silver tabby to back away and sneeze.

"Only to get attention when you stole the show," Munkustrap said after recovering. "When was the last time you took a bath? Your mane is as dusty as Macavity's!"

"MACAVITY!" Demeter shot up out of instinct, eyes wide, hackles raised, causing the three surrounding cats to jump in surprise, each with their own fur puffing out. When they recovered, Bombalurina put her arm around her sister, before glaring at Munkustrap.

"You know she's sensitive about that name," she admonished.

"I…uh…didn't know she was there," he said, before regaining the composure expected of the Jellicle protector. "What are you two doing here?"

"And how long have you been here?" asked Tugger out of curiosity.

"We've been sunning here for a while," Demeter said, licking her paw and using it to groom her fluffed up fur. "Until you two came along."

"Then you decided to eavesdrop?" Munkustrap asked sternly, folding his arms and tapping his foot for emphasis.

"We weren't eavesdropping!" Bombalurina defended. "We couldn't help but overhear, the way you two were bellowing! What are you fighting about, anyway?"

"Nothing" the two toms said at the same time.

Demeter rubbed her ear. "Nothing has never sounded so loud…"

"Look," Munkustrap began, "We're just having a little argument. It's fine, no need to worry. And in a bit, we're both going to go our separate ways, and forget this whole thing ever happened." The queens glanced at each other, each feeling equally patronized.

"Yeah," Tugger agreed. "As soon as Munk apologizes, we'll be on our way."

"ME!" Munkustrap spun around to face his brother. "What do I have to apologize for? You're the one who started this! You should apologize to me!"

"Well, you're not going to get that," Tugger said, trying his best to stare the other down. "And I'm not going to talk to you until I get what I deserve!"

"I'll give you what you deserve," Munkustrap said as he took a step towards the tom. Before he knew it, two queens were holding him back.

"He's your brother!" Demeter yelled over the growling of the two toms.

"Yeah!" Bombalurina agreed. "And he's too sexy to hurt!" Tugger smiled to Bombalurina, who would have continued with the flirtation were she not holding back an angry tabby.

After a few moments of struggling, Munkustrap abruptly threw his paws up in the air and yelled, "FINE! I'm going to my den. I hope I don't have to see that ridiculous coiffure of yours for the rest of my life!" He turned and stormed away, nearly dragging the two queens with him before they let go.

Tugger turned to Demeter, who had somehow ended up on the floor gasping for air, and asked, "What's a coiffure?"

"Your…fur…" she panted. (She had never realized how strong Munkustrap could be when he was angry!)

"My…my fur is ridiculous!" Tugger gaped at the queen before cupping his paws over his mouth and yelling after the silver tabby, "Well, at least I don't have that stupid grin on my face all the time!" He, too, turned and walked away in a huff, his prominent coiffure frazzled from being so angry.

The two queens looked at each other. Having caught her breath, Demeter got up and dusted the soil from her fur before turning to her sister. "I'll take Munku?"

"And I'll go to Tugger," Bombalurina finished, before rolling her eyes. "Toms!"

"Tell me about it…" They both went after their respective mates.


"I'm never talking to him again!" Munkustrap said, or rather, screamed. Demeter shrunk down slightly, but was determined to resolve the matter.

"You can't not talk to him, Munku," she said patiently. "You live in the same junkyard. You talk to the same cats. You have the same father! You…uh…" Demeter was at a loss for any more examples, so finished with an adamant, "You can't not talk to him!"

"Oh, we'll see about that," said the tabby, as he started to pace around the old oven he called his den. "I wonder if I can get Mistoffelees to cast a spell to ward him away from me." A diabolic grin came across the otherwise peaceful face of the silver tabby, and Demeter could almost guess what he was imagining. Tugger, about ten feet away from Munkustrap, coming closer. The second he came to close, BAM! The Maine Coon would be sent flying 50 feet backwards and crashing into some putrid pile of garbage. Or something to that effect. (What a morbid sense of humor the protector of the tribe had…)

"I don't think Misto is that powerful," Demeter said gently. "And you're always telling other not to ask such ridiculous things of him."

"Ridiculous?" Munkustrap looked over to Demeter, hurt by the words. "What are you trying to say, Dem?

"Uh…" Had she struck a nerve?

"He's the one who's ridiculous!" he said loudly, slowly increasing the volume of his voice as he continued. "He's constantly taking other's things, not caring about anyone but himself! You should see him with his owner…she's bound to go INSANE, if she isn't already. I've seen him fight with her for hours for a chair…achair! When was the last time you fought your human for a chair? He only cares about what he wants! And you're calling me ridiculous!"

"No, Munku, that's now what I meant at all! I…" But the tom waved a dismissive paw at her.

"Please leave, Demeter. I don't want to have to get into a fight with you, too." Demeter's eyes shot open, before narrowing to glare at the tom. Without a word, she turned, flicked her tail in cat sign language not befitting a queen, and left the silver tom's den.


Bombalurina met up with Demeter at the old tire. She took one look at her sister's face and then sighed. "No luck, by the looks of it?"

"No," Demeter sighed. "And now he's mad at me, too."

"Ah, don't worry, Demi," Bombalurina smiled. "They're toms, they get over these things easily. Tugger seemed upset with me, too."

"Really?" Demeter seemed to perk up at this news. "How did that happen?"

"Oh, I was trying to remind him that Munkustrap was kind of important in the tribe, and that he couldn't very well avoid him, but he thought I was siding with him, and kicked me out of his den. Not literally, mind you." The red queen took a seat next to her sister.

"Yeah," Demeter agreed. "Munku is very important in the tribe. Tugger should know that he can't avoid him."

There was a moment of silence. "Well…" Bombalurina began, flexing her claws on the old tire they were seated on. "That's not to say Tugger isn't important as well."

"Oh, no, of course not. He's important." Demeter failed to hide her sarcasm.

"What are you trying to say?" the red queen asked, looked the gold queen over as though sizing her up for a fight.

"He doesn't do anything around her, Bomba! And he's rude to all the queens. Especially you! He just wants attention."

"He's not rude to me, Dem…" her voice sounded strained.

"Did you forget the Jellicle ball?" Demeter said. "How he dropped you?"

Bombalurina got up on her feet, put her paws on her hips, and stared down at her little sister. "He apologized for that! And we were having a fight then. Everlasting Cat, Dem, you're always faulting him!'

"Well he makes it so easy!" Demeter got up and tried to stand as tall as her sister, though failing miserably, as that was hardly enough time to grow more than a head tall. "He treats you horribly! Why do you have to get involved with him? He's going to hurt you!"

"Oh, I'm sorry," said the red queen dramatically, as she put a paw over her heart as though it were in pain. "I should always trust your word. I'm only you're older sister, after all. Apparently, that means I know nothing! I'm just a big airhead to you, aren't I?"

"You're always putting words in my mouth!" Demeter stamped her foot on the tire in a kitten-like manner. "And it doesn't really matter if I tell you what to do, because you can't even to pretend to care about what I think!"

"Why are we still even talking?" Bombalurina asked, putting her paws out as though she were asking the cosmic question. "Why don't you go to your precious little Munku, who, according to you, has never done anything wrong in his whole entire life, and go complain about my Tugger while frolicking in a meadow, or whatever it is you wise and unfaultable cats do?"

"Fine, I will! And why don't you…uh…" Well, Demeter couldn't send her sister running to a cat she thought unsuitable for her. "Why…why don't you….you…uh…" The smirk on Bombalurina's face made the gold queen angrier. "JUST GO TO HELL! Or whatever the cat equivalent of hell is!"

Bombalurina looked shocked for a moment, but quickly recovered with an angry scowl and a sharp "Fine!" before turning on her heels and leaving.

Demeter took a moment to calm down, catching her breath, and patting down her fur. And in the confusion of everything that was going on, one thought stuck out in her mind. "We have a heaven…what is the cat hell?" she wondered out loud, before realizing the severity of the situation, and feeling awful over what transpired.


"Don't be so upset, dear," Jennyanydots said, patting the sobbing Demeter on the head. She had come to cry on her shoulder at having fought with the two most important cats in her life.

"I…just…feel…so…bad!" Demeter said between sobs. She buried her face in the Gumby Cat's shoulder. "I didn't mean to make them mad at me…but now…I've ruined EVERYTHING!" She fell into convulsing sobs, to which Jennyanydots sighed and patted her on the back.

"You'll be fine, my dear," said the older queen. "They'll cool off and you can work everything out."

Demeter looked up at the queen. "Do you have a sister, Jenny?"

"Oh…many, dear," she said. "But I haven't talked to them since we were all adopted out. But I guess you could say that Jellylorum is my sister."

"Doesn't she ever do anything that makes you mad?" inquired the young queen.

"Well, of course she does. We all get on each other's nerves at times."

"I think that's great," Demeter said, sniffling. "I've never see you two fight. I never would have thought you two had any problems!

"Well," Jennyanydots chuckled lightly. "There was that time she thought it okay to let young Pouncival use my mice for hunting practice." Her smile strained at the memory. "And she's always asking me to make mouse-cakes for her and her friends when she goes to visit them. And she never invites me, oh no! Because she tells them she made the cakes herself!" The older queen remembered that Demeter was there and realized her voice had risen to a frightening level, and so tried to laugh it off. "But I can forgive those things, because I love her dearly!"

"Did…" Demeter bit her lip, but the Gumby Cat gave an encouraging smile, telling her to continue her inquiry. "Did any of the mice die?

The Gumby Cat continued smiling, though her eye twitched rather violently. "No. Skimbleshanks came in and stopped the…precious…kitten from harming my mice."

"Where is he, anyway?" Demeter sat up and looked around. "I wanted to get advice from a tom's point of view."

"Oh?" the queen sounded a little hurt. "Well, he's coming home soon. What did you want to ask him? Maybe I can help."

"Just 'why are toms so stubborn?'" Demeter said, folding her arms and sighing.

"Oh," Jennyanydots laughed slightly. "That's a whole other conversation!" After taking a few glimpses around, she began recanting tales of how the Railway Cat had messed up a time or two…or ten. And after regaling her with such stories, Demeter felt a little better about things.

"And you still forgave him?" The older queen nodded. "Weren't you angry with him? By the sound of things, there were times when he should have begged for forgiveness!"

"Well…" Jennyanydots seemed to take this into consideration. Demeter bit her lip. She didn't mean to open any old wounds. "He should have…" came the conclusion from the old Gumby Cat.

A brown and orange cat came through the opening of the old car. "I'm home!" he announced. Demeter smiled over to Skimbleshanks, but when he saw the confused look on his face, she looked back at Jennyanydots. There was an angry gleam in her eye…

"Uh, I think I should get going now, Skimble…" Demeter quickly got up and raced out of the den.


"I've already apologized a million times for that!" said Jellylorum to the Gumby Cat. "I didn't know those cockroaches were your friends!"

Etcetera and Electra were looking down at the feuding mother cats. They had come in on the fight right as Skimbleshanks had screamed a not so dear "goodnight" and stormed into the den Jennyanydots and he shared, closing it off with an old trash can lid, effectively locking Jennyanydots out. Jemima came up behind the two, complete with kitty fish treats, and handed some to the other queens, as the three sat and watched from their vantage point atop a pile of junk.

"What are you three doing?" The kittens turned to see Tumblebrutus and Pouncival staring down at them.

"The grown ups are fighting!" Jemima announce, taking far too much pleasure in the argument between adults.

"Move aside," Pouncival said, knocking Electra out of the way and sitting down among the female kittens.

"Could you be any ruder, Pounce?" Tumblebrutus rolled his eyes and patted Etcetera on the back, who quickly scooted over, not missing a beat in her tried and true method of eating fish treats and watching the grown ups intently.

Jennyanydots put her paws over her ears. "Oh, I've had enough of listening to your excuses, Jelly. Why can't you just admit you're in the wrong?"

"Me?" Jellylorum asked, turning from a defensive stance to one more apt to attack. "How about you? Remember when you cross-stitched that ugly cat into my owner's favorite pillow! She was livid!"

"It was NOT ugly!" defended the other. "It was beautiful, and if your owner had any taste, she wouldn't have given you that dreadful collar!"

"I happen to like this collar!" Jellylorum defended, pointing said collar. "And this isn't from my owner. I'll have you know that Pouncival gave it to me in thank you for helping him learn how to better hunt mice!"

"MY MICE!" Jennyanydots cried.

Pouncival smiled from the safety of his vantage point. "Oh, yeah. I remember that." But the feeling of eyes boring into him wiped the smile from his face, as he turned his head to see the other kittens were staring daggers at him. "Uh…what?"

"We all made that for her," Tumblebrutus said slowly.

"And you took the credit?" Etcetera finished. Pouncival thought it best to flee at that moment…


It was a nice crisp night, and Old Deuteronomy was making his way to his peaceful tribe in the junkyard, hoping to spend time with his family and friends. But the moment his paw stepped into the junkyard, he stopped cold. Something was off. The atmosphere thickened the second he entered the junkyard. Then the sound of bickering hit his ears, and he gave a great sigh, before walking cautiously past the dismay.

As he walked past a pipe, he heard the distinct cockney accent yelling shrilly, "IT WAS MY FAVORITE, AN' YOU GAVE IT TO MACAVITY!"

"What was I SUPPOSED to do, Teazah? Go back empty-pawed?" Old Deuteronomy did his best to pretend he didn't hear that as he walked past. His paws fell into a rhythmic motion, as though he were on a ride taking him past the turmoil that overcame the cats of the junkyard that night.

"Oh, come ON Cassandra! Don't throw that out! NO! That's wasn't even mine!" Alonzo was picking up some items thrown out of a hollowed out barrel, where the two were trying their paws at sharing a place. Cassandra's tail was visible as she shifted through the items they had in their shared den, but her voice rung loud and clear.

"It wasn't yours? Then where did it come from? One of your queen friends? I hope it shattered into a million pieces!"

"Hey, at least I don't throw myself at Tugger!" defended Alonzo. Old Deuteronomy didn't hear much after that. He got caught up in another argument that was taking place near a broken bookshelf.

"You are always copying everything I do," said the somewhat even voice of Tantomile. But the old cat could tell she was upset, if she raised her voice in even the slightest way. "Give me a little space now and then."

"I will give you all the space you want," said the similarly even voice of Coricopat. "And I'm not going to come back so that you can try and hide me as your shadow, as always." It sounded as though they had just finished a business transaction. The tribe leader shook his head as he passed the two strangely quarreling siblings.

"Always with the magic!" rang the voice of Victoria, though they weren't anywhere in sight. "Magic, magic, magic! Why don't you ever think about reality? You know, real things? Like your friends? Like you family? Like me!"

"How can you be upset that I'm trying to hone my craft?" defended the conjuring cat.

When he saw that Demeter and Bombalurina locked eyes for a moment, before glaring at each other and turning the other way, he made his way over to Munkustrap's den. Old Deuteronomy had had enough.

The tribe leader came to the opening of the oven, where he saw Munkustrap laying down, faced away from him, the tip of his tail twitching back and forth rapidly. He tapped his paw on the side of the oven to let him know of his presence. "Go away, Tugger!" called the irate voice of the silver tabby.

"Munkustrap." The tabby jumped up and spun around at the stern voice of his father. "What has been happening here tonight?" To Old Deuteronomy's surprise, it seemed Munkustrap had no idea what he was talking about…


Old Deuteronomy looked down on his tribe. All of them were either not speaking to their dearest friends and family, or quietly bickering about something under their breaths. While waiting for them to settle down, they did just the opposite. Slowly, they were getting louder, and louder, and louder, until they were all yelling at each other in a stream of dialogue that no outsider would possibly be able to comprehend. Old Deuteronomy looked over to his son, who nodded wearily. He stood up on the tire and took a deep breath. "QUIET!" But they hardly heard him. A little more determined this time, Munkustrap got up on the old car and tried one more time. "QUIET!"

Finally, everyone looked up. But it was hardly looks of attention the silver tabby received. Rather, it seemed that they were going to turn their attacks on him. Slightly taken about, Munkustrap slinked down and sat near his father.

"I'm very disappointed in all of you tonight," began the old cat. "I come back from a long day to find you all bickering?"

Pouncival turned and whispered to whoever would listen, "How tired can you be from sitting on a wall all day?" All eyes turned to glare at him. "Oh…I didn't think I said that so loud…" He then shrank to two inches tall…or tried to, at least.

"How did all this begin?" asked the old cat. But when everyone began to explain over one another, he quickly put up his paw to silence them. "One at a time! Who would like to go first?" Of course, most of the cats who had quarreled that day raised their paws. But Old Deuteronomy's attention went to Etcetera, who was jumping up and down, paw raised, biting her lip in anticipation of being called upon. "Very well…Etcetera?"

All the cats groaned as the calico stood up. "Well, it all started when we were listening to Jenny and Skimble fighting. Then Jenny and Jelly were fighting, and me and the other kittens were watching, when Jelly said that the collar…" She stopped and looked over to Pouncival. "That we ALL made her for…was given to her by Pouncival, and he took all the credit. So we started fighting with him, and we went to Victoria to settle the matter, and Misto said something about conjuring up another collar, a better one, and then I don't really know what happened." Etcetera nodded in finality as all the cats mentioned ducked their heads in embarrassment.

Old Deuteronomy took a moment to consider this before turning to Jennyanydots, Skimbleshanks, and Jellylorum. "You three should be ashamed of yourself. Fighting in front of the kittens! No wonder all this fiasco broke out." The three hung their heads. "What could you possibly have found so upsetting you would argue about?"

The two other cats turned to the Gumby Cat. She wrung a handkerchief in her paws, before dabbing under her swollen red eyes. Apparently, she had been crying at one point of her arguments. "Oh, I was telling Demeter about Skimbleshanks and Jellylorum, and it brought up a lot of past issues that were never really resolved, and….I'm just so tired of being taken for granted!" She blew her nose into her handkerchief. Skimbleshanks looked distressed, and scooted close to his mate, putting a paw on her shoulder. (He hated seeing queens cry.)

"Now, now, Jenny," he began. "You know…I come home from a hard days work, and I just wasn't expecting to be attacked. I didn't think you thought I took advantage of you. We all appreciate what you do here." Jellylorum nodded, giving her friend a hug.

"I always thought you were so great," said the cream and yellow queen. "Always taking on everything! I just wanted to try my paw at helping the kittens, and be as great as you at cooking. But…well…I'm not good at those things. I'm sorry I upset you."

Pouncival made an audible gagging sound, which made the other kittens laugh. When Old Deuteronomy looked at him, he again tried to disappear into nothingness. "Pouncival," said the old cat. "Apologize for taking credit for something all the kittens made."

Hesitantly, the little tom stood up, sighing quite audibly. "I'm sorry," he said. Electra pulled on the tom's tail, making him sit amongst the other kittens. That was their way of forgiving him.

"Now…" said Old Deuteronomy, turning back to Jennyanydots. "What was Demeter talking to you about that you would become so upset with your mate and friend?" All eyes turned to the nervous queen, who let out a barely audible 'eep!'

"Oh," Jennyanydots said passively, waving her handkerchief in the air dismissively. "She was just upset about Bombalurina and Munkustrap being mad at her."

"JENNY!" Demeter gasped, before looking about at her fellow Jellicles in embarrassment. She resorted to burying her face in her paws, blushing madly.

"Oh, I'm sorry, dear!" said the older queen. "I didn't think it would be a problem."

"Yeah, right," Demeter muttered under her breath. "You did that on purpose…"

"Demeter?" The queen looked up to Old Deuteronomy. "If you would please? We have to get to the bottom of this." Demeter stared at Old Deuteronomy, trying to avoid eye contact with the tabby beside the Jellicle Leader who was avoiding eye contact with her.

Demeter took in a deep breath. "Uh…Bombalurina is mad at me because she thinks I don't like Tugger."

"Hey!" the Maine Coon said, shooting an angry look at the queen.

"But, it's not that I don't like you, Tugger!" She defended. "I hate the way you disregard my sister! And here she was, defending you after you kicked her out of your den, when you wouldn't otherwise give her the time of day!" The Jellicles all turned their attentions to Bombalurina, who took a step back in alarm. She liked attention, but not this kind...

"What?" she asked, trying to look nonchalant. "We weren't doing anything! I was just trying to get him to talk to Munku!" Then, inevitably, all eyes turned to Munkustrap, who sighed, and slapped his forehead.

"The Rum Tum Tugger and Munkustrap…fighting?" Jellylorum asked, looking around her for an explanation. "It actually made the world stop turning for a moment…" All the cats marveled at this realization. Sure, the two had their spats here and there, but they tolerated each other for the most part. No one could foresee the consequences leading to this.

"You two," Old Deuteronomy said to his sons. "Come with me." Looking around, the two begrudgingly followed Old Deuteronomy up the tire and towards his den. But there was a burst of laughter that made the old cat swirl around. Munkustrap had been shoved into the opening of the tire, and was not struggling to climb back out and regain his composure. Tugger had a smirk on his face, but looked innocent when the Tribe Leader gave him a reproachful look. "Come," he said more forcefully, and the smile was wiped from Tugger's face as he followed. An irate Munkustrap quickly scrambled after the two, not daring to look back at the tribe.


"What is troubling the two of you?" asked the Old Cat as they sat in his den. The two brothers, far older than they were acting, looked away from each other, both with a look on their face telling the tribe leader they did not want to be in each other's presence. "Alright, I'll start with a simpler question. What started this argument?" The two pointed at each other, locking eyes, and a glaring contest ensued. Old Deuteronomy sighed. "I said 'what', not 'who.'"

"Ask Mr. Tail-Held-Too-High-To-Be-Bothered-With-The-Commoners over here," Tugger said, pointing his paw at the silver tabby. "He's the one who's so uptight about everything!"

"You destroyed him, Tugger!" said Munkustrap, sounding more like a kitten throwing a tantrum than an adult cat. "And now he'll never be the same!"

"Destroyed?" Old Deuteronomy asked, intrigued. "Who?" But Munkustrap, remembering where he was, went silent. The Rum Tum Tugger, however, had a diabolical smile on his face.

"His teddy bear."

"Tugger!" Munkustrap growled.

"He sleeps with a teddy bear in his bed at his human's house!" Tugger smiled at the horrified look on Munkustrap's face. He didn't often rub Munkustrap the wrong way on purpose. It usually came naturally. But even Tugger had to give into his dark side at times.

"He's not a Teddy Bear!" Munkustrap defended, before shifting his line of sight to Old Deuteronomy. "He's not! My family gave him to me when I was a kitten…he's just kind of…sits in the corner of the living room…"

"Where his bed is," said Tugger.

"FOR DECORATION!"

"Then why are you so mad that I 'destroyed' him?"

"Because you tore his nose off with your rough playing," Munkustrap yelled, slamming his paw on the floor. "You always do that! You don't even care that it was mine! You just swooped right in and started playing with Fluffalufagus like it was nothing!" Tugger smiled widely. "MY OWNER NAMED HIM!"

"You're so uptight about all your things," Tugger shot back. "Why don't you share the wealth?"

"Okay," Old Deuteronomy said. "It seemed that you two have much deeper problems than this…uh…" he held out a paw to Munkustrap for help.

"Fluffalufagus," Munkustrap said softly, before clearing his throat.

"Than this…Fluffalufagus. Now, perhaps we should talk this out in a calm--"

"YOU'RE SUCH A POLLICLE!" Munkustrap said loudly.

"TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE!" Tugger shot back.

"CALMLY!" Old Deuteronomy bellowed. The young toms broke off their attacks and looked away from each other, each obviously upset. "It seems," said the old cat after catching his breath. "That you two have deeper issues. Munkustrap feels that you don't appreciate anything of his, and Tugger feels that…" He looked over to his other son for help.

Tugger sighed. "He's so responsible. What does that make me, chopped liver?" Tugger thought of said food, seeming pleased with it at first, before sneering at it.

"And your brother feels that he is overshadowed by you," Tugger frowned at the words. "But you two have to resolve your difference rather than wait for it to accumulate and turn into what happened tonight. Now, do you two need to stay here…like kittens…and have me work out your difference for you, or can you resolve it yourselves?"

The two brothers sighed at the same time before looking at each other. "We can solve it on our own," Munkustrap said, sizing Tugger up. "Thank you, Old Deuteronomy."

The two got up and left the old cat, walking together for a moment before stopping. "I'm…sorry that I killed your teddy bear," Tugger said, before realizing how odd that statement in itself sounded.

"I'm sorry I called you a Pollicle." There was a moment of silence. The two brothers looked at each other, both with arms crossed. They then burst out laughing. "I can't believe I was about to beat you up!"

"You wouldn't have been able to!" Tugger assured him, fluffing his mane. "But you were hilarious when you fell into that tire! FLOP!" Tugger bent forward, falling into a fit of laughter. Munkustrap stared at him, a smile stained on his face, though a murderous gleam was in his eye. "Hey, come on, Munk!" he said after recovering. "It could be worse! Think of having a brotherly fight with Macavity."

The smile was wiped off both of their faces. Not only at the thought of their otherwise unnamed brother, but at the queen who was sensitive to the name. "Oh, CATNIP!" The Rum Tum Tugger said.

"The queens!" Munkustrap and Tugger ran over to where they left the queens they now had to apologize to…and knowing how hard it can be to apologize to a queen, prepared to beg for forgiveness. They also planned to being some flowers…gourmet cat treats…perhaps a new collar.

There was a reason Tugger never tried to keep to one queen…