Title: Giving In To Temptation

Rating: PG-13

Disclaimer: And Bob did sayeth, "Capcom doeth own Devil May Cry, and thou shalt not steal from them!" And it was so.

A/N: Yay! Happy Holidays everyone (though I am unimaginably late) :P This is for layrna6's Holiday fic contest. I have another entry on the way too, just as soon as I get it on 'paper' so to speak. Darned thing refuses to be written. :( Anyway I tried to make this humorous, but you know me; I can't! Enjoy the show. :)

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As stealthily as she could Lady crept from one shadow to another. Barely making a sound she kept her back to the wall as she slinked through the gloomy hallways of the building. It was vital that she remain undetected until she finished her mission. Her well-being, no, her sanity was on the line, and she'd be damned if she failed! She wasn't known as the bane of all demons for nothing! Her reputation as a demon hunter was renowned and …

"Awww, Vergil! But this would look so cute on you!"

"Dante," the eldest brother said with forced patience. "If you insist on placing that ridiculous ribbon on my head, I will return the favour. But I'll use your intestines instead."

"Party pooper," Dante chided. "Where's your holiday spirit?"

Apparently Vergil had misplaced his holiday spirit since the sounds of a scuffle, accompanied by Dante's wild laughter, immediately broke out.

'OK, why did I even bother?' Lady thought as she straightened up from her crouched position. With the ruckus those two were making they wouldn't notice a rampaging elephant stampeding through Devil May Cry.

Casually entering the kitchen, Lady scanned the counters for her prize. It took her a few moments since boxes, plates (in varying states of cleanliness), and eating utensils took up all the available space.

'I should have gotten them a black hole for Christmas,' she wrinkled her nose at the mess. 'That way they can just shove all this crap inside.'

Honestly, you'd think Vergil would be able to keep a clean home. Then again he had to pick up after Dante. She supposed Vergil wasn't a miracle worker, proficient as he was.

But fussing over this disaster area wasn't why she was here.

With eager eyes she spotted a white box sitting under a pile of holiday-print napkins. Oh, the box was plain and innocent enough, but inside was something so tempting and so decadent that it should have been a sin.

"There you are, my precious," she crooned as she lifted the box's lid. The smell that hit her almost made her purr.

Hastily grabbing a hilt that was sticking out from under some paper plates, she was pleasantly surprised when she pulled out a proper kitchen knife. When she ate at the Sparda residence it was anyone's guess what kind of blade they would use as cutlery.

(This reminded her about their recent Christmas dinner actually. Dante had tried to use Rebellion to cut the turkey. Apparently he'd dipped into 'Dante's special de duper eggnog' a little bit too much beforehand. Fortunately Vergil had managed to stop him in time … by throwing a silver dish cover at his face. It had been a Kodak moment and she had the photos to prove it.)

Using the proper tool for the job, Lady cut a thick slice of Chocolate 'n' Fudge Volcano Explosion. She almost drooled on her piece as she transferred it onto a paper plate. Leaving the knife on a box of plastic wrap, she snagged a disposable fork and seated herself at the crowded dinette table.

Shoving a pile of crumpled hamburger wrappers onto the floor; no one would notice a little extra mess; Lady took this moment to wipe a tear of joy from her eye.

Last year she had made the vow that most women make on New Years Eve: she was going on a diet. She'd made the promise when she noticed her gun holsters getting a little too snug for her liking. And her clothes had started to chafe in places they hadn't rubbed against before.

Vergil's comments hadn't helped either.

"Are you sure you want another helping of (insert food here)," he would often ask her while giving her a look. It had been most irritating but she'd gotten the hint. Eventually.

'It's not my fault,' she thought crossly to herself. 'Damn Dante is always ordering pizza! And it's not like I have time to make and eat a balanced meal during devil hunts!'

So for the entire year she had forsaken sweets, processed foods, and carbs. After the initial crankiness and hunger pangs, she had found that it wasn't so bad. Vergil, that stoic, self-absorbed half-breed, had been surprisingly supportive too. He'd even gotten her apples and other fruits when he went grocery shopping for himself.

And all that hard work and self-torture had paid off. She was fitter than she'd ever remembered, and had energy to burn. Even Vergil had remarked on how nice she looked (although his exact adjective was "healthy".) Dante … well he had just been a flirty pain in the arse till she shot him in the forehead again. But his attentions were appreciated nonetheless.

But oh God, how she missed chocolate! She'd used it to calm down when she was angry, or to pick herself up when she was in a deep blue funk. And it made dealing with her period a whole lot easier when her monthly monster came. Being deprived of her favourite sweet for so long was more than she could bear.

"But now we're together again!" she giggled as she raised her fork in anticipation. The prongs on the utensil seemed to gleam in the light even though they were made from cheap plastic.

Lady was enraptured as she watched the fork cut through the tip of her slice. There were not one, not two, but three layers of moist chocolate cake. And in between those fluffy, mouth-watering layers was rich chocolate fudge and small chocolate chips. A more liquid fudge had been at the center of the cake as well (hence the 'Volcano' part of the name) and she had gotten a good portion of it on her piece. And to top it all off it had chocolate flavoured butter cream icing, whipped cream, Maraschino cherries, and chocolate curls.

'I swear, this must have been made by the King of Hell himself,' Lady thought lustily as she scooped the tasty portion onto her fork. Nothing this sumptuous and hedonistic could have come from Heaven.

She was momentarily tempted to just stick her face into the cake, but good manners won out. Lady wasn't that desperate.

About to engulf the cake into her mouth, an errant thought stopped her.

'Vergil will be disappointed.'

Her fork lowered a fraction.

Vergil had grudgingly admitted that he was impressed by her will power and perseverance. She hadn't cheated on her diet once, and he was proud of her self-control. Lady knew how hard it was to gain the respect of the eldest Sparda twin.

"Oh … damn," she cursed as she put the fork down. Her freakin' conscience had to rear its stupid head, and she couldn't enjoy her chocolate cake anymore.

"But I waaaaaaant it," Lady almost whined. All that chocolaty goodness was staring her right in the face and it was all but shoving itself into her mouth. She could almost taste it on her tongue and feel its velvety smoothness slide down her palate.

"Damn it to Hell!" she yelled, throwing caution, and her old New Year's resolution, to the wind. "I'm going for it!"

Vergil couldn't be disappointed if he didn't know, right? And right now he was busy trying to use Dante's innards as a hat.

'Besides,' she thought happily as she picked up her fork again. 'They're demons for crying out loud. I'm sure they know all about temptation.'

Content with her logic she brought the chocolate cake, just dripping with sinful, tasty, goodness, to her mouth.

"What's this? Giving in to temptation?"

Her arm froze.

Turning to face the kitchen door, she saw Dante giving her a Cheshire cat grin. He leaned against the doorframe, and looked utterly sexy in nothing but some tight black jeans. Well … he would have looked sexy if he weren't wearing a red Rudolph nose and plushy antlers on his head.

"Tsk, tsk, Lady!" he waggled a finger at her as he sat across the table. "What happened to my iron-willed angel?"

"Oh shut up," she huffed as she dropped the fork a second time. What did dumb Dante know about it? He ate pizza anytime he wanted to and didn't gain a friggin' ounce. It wasn't fair, dammit!

"Aww, don't be like that!" he grinned at her pouty face. She really was adorable when she was mad (and not homicidal). "It's Christmas! I'll let it slide, just this once."

"Really?" Lady immediately perked up.

"Think of it as a second gift," he nudged her plate closer to her. "You know, to make up for the first once."

She had to roll her eyes at him. The original Kama Sutra guide wasn't exactly what she wanted under the tree this year. But … she wasn't one to look a gift horse in the mouth.

Taking up her fork yet again, she raised that tantalizing piece to her face. She felt the fluffy softness brush against her lips and …

"Are you two in there?"

Her entire body stiffened as her eyes widened in horror.

Vergil was on the other side of the door, and he was going to come in at any second. And he'd catch her breaking her New Year's resolution and he'd be all smug and in her face about it and he'd never shut up and …

The door swung open.

Vergil, impeccably dressed in black dress pants, a dress shirt, and an expensive blue sweater, strode in.

He stared at Lady.

Lady smiled at him as innocently as she could.

Vergil blinked and looked at his brother.

"Dante, do you ever get full?" he asked in exasperation.

"Nope," he said. "I thought it was nice of our last customer to give us this cake, so I might as well eat it."

Lady's smile froze.

Woodenly she turned around to face Dante again. He gave her a sloppy smirk, dark brown crumbs at each corner of his mouth falling onto the table. Dante was deftly twirling the plastic fork in his hand, and a large portion of the slice had gone down his gullet already.

He was eating her cake. It didn't matter that he'd just saved her reputation by swiping her plate.

He was eating her cake.

Someone's head was going to roll for this.

With a mighty effort Lady squelched the urge to rip out Dante's throat. Vergil didn't like it when people tried to murder his sibling (unless he was doing it, of course). So she did the next best thing under the circumstances.

Thwack

"Ah!" Dante barely managed to keep from yelling in shock and pain. He leaned over the table, narrowly missing planting his face into the cake.

Lady's smile turned nasty. Her foot had connected nicely with his shin, and this current pair of boots she was wearing was steel-toed.

Vergil quirked an eyebrow at his brother's strange behaviour.

"Is there something the matter?"

"Nothing," Dante managed to choke out. The bruise (temporary as it would be) from Lady's kick would be a beauty. "It was just gas."

Vergil unconsciously leaned away from him.

"I, uh, think I'll finish this in the living room," Dante said as he quickly got up. He grinned wickedly at her heated glare as he took the plate and fork. And just to rub it into her face he took another quick bite of chocolaty delight.

Let it be said that Dante never wasted a chance to tease/torture Lady.

He beat a hasty retreat and scampered out of the kitchen; he thought he heard her growling. And one of her eyes had started to tic. It was kind of creepy.

Vergil looked at Lady's face and started in surprise. She looked ready to murder someone, and he wondered what Dante had done.

Deciding to calm her down before she literally blew away the holidays, he took over Dante's spot at the table.

"So," he began conversationally, "how do you like the dress I bought you?"

"It's very nice, Vergil. Thank you," she said almost mechanically. Twitch, went the corner of her eye.

"I chose black because it's slimming," he said, not really paying attention to his words. He thought Dante had managed to stick that ribbon on him before running away to the kitchen. Vergil hoped he didn't have it on him right now though, even if the pink did match his sweater. He wouldn't be caught dead weari …

Thwack

"Ow!" Vergil said and grabbed his throbbing knee. His breath came out in a hiss as he furiously rubbed his abused joint.

"What the Hell was that for?"

Lady ignored his pained question and simply took the white box from the counter. She didn't bother getting any forks, spoons, plates, or napkins. Her hands and fingers would be more than enough for this task.

Flashing Vergil a winning smile (which also made him stop cursing her for the next moment or two), she flounced out of the kitchen and to the guest bedroom she used when she stayed over.

For next year's resolution, she vowed never to listen to Vergil again.