Liz liked her coffee black. Strong, rich, and flavorful.

John, on the other hand...

"What're you drinking scout?"

"Oh H-Hellboy, hey Red. I didn't see you there."

"Right. So what're you drinking?"

When John's face flushed embarrassedly Hellboy knew he was on to something.

"Can't you tell?"

John envisioned Hellboy's eyebrows raising.

"It's ...coffee, Red."

"Really?"

"Um...yes...I mean, of course it is..."

"Sorry there boyscout, you have so much cream in there I didn't recognize the coffee."

"There's not that much cream Red."

"Well, I guess it could be worse. You could have it swimming in sugar."

John faultered, red faced.

"Why not sugar?"

Hellboy's features suddenly took on a sly angle.

"Why Myers, everyone knows that only girls put cream and sugar in their coffee. Ruins the taste. Us men are much more distinguished, we wouldn't dream of ruining the taste with both. One is excusable, but both!"

The look on John's face was priceless.

"W-well lucky I never put any sugar in it then. I mean, not that I would have but-"

"Bitter and creamy is your flavor, is it?"

"Uh, sure. Of course, usually I drink it black but today I thought I'd try something different."

"You sure are something Myers."

"What are you talking ab-" Here Hellboy snatched away John's coffee mug, "Hellboy, what do you think you're doing!"

"Shh, quiet Myers, I'm conducting an experiment."

Hellboy couldn't help inwardly laughing at the horrified look on John's face as he took a gulp from the mug in his hand. John froze in place.

Instead of grimacing at the abundance of sugar Hellboy merely gave John a mocking smile before letting out a small fake disappointed sigh.

"Just as I suspected Myers, your coffee is as sweet as you are."

Hellboy gave a chuckle at John's furrowed eyebrows and confused expression.

"Myers, you're a terrible liar. Better give it up while you're still ahead."

And with that Hellboy left the room with a satisfied smirk. So John liked his coffee sweet and creamy. Somehow that wasn't surprising.