A/N: A random plot inspired by all of the stupid Christmas songs they keep playing.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
Kyuubi is bored and Naruto hates it when this happens. Yeah, sure, he is bored too, but that is what makes the situation oh so much worse.
Why is that, you ask?
Well, when Kyuubi is bored, he tends to think it an amusing past time to rifle through the boy's memories. And the boy is privy to his thoughts, as well as the actual memories, when he goes through them. Also, the Kyuubi doesn't dwell on the most important or the most embarrassing moments (the boy already does this enough on his own and he already knows Kyuubi's opinions on the matter), oh no, he tries to find the most obscure memory he can get his han-er… paws on and comments thoroughly on every single little detail. Because of this, Naruto has an uncanny ability to remember a lot of stuff- he is constantly being forced to see them over and over again, but I digress.
And everybody always wonders why Naruto never lets life become boring.
Currently, Kyuubi is forcing the boy to relive the memory of when he was on a mission to Kusogakure no Sato. The mission was a simple C class and would have gone off without a hitch, if it weren't for one simple little fact: the client had insisted on listening to the same song over and over and over again for two weeks straight, night-and-day.
At first, Naruto kind of liked the song. It was one of those that's just on the border of your personal tastes in music, so you don't really mind listening to it. However, after the third day of the song, even Sasuke and Kakashi were about ready to rend the man's head from his shoulders. By the time that the mission was over, it had been ingrained into their heads, robbing them of thought, and they would often find themselves humming the tune when they didn't hear it because they weren't in the vicinity of their client.
It took Naruto a month to get the damn song out of his head when he returned to Konoha.
And now, a year later, Kyuubi apparently thought that it would be fun to bring the memory to the forefront of the boy's mind. Naruto resisted the urge to scream at the stupid demon that he had been just as ready to slaughter the client as everyone else at the time. It also didn't help that fact that Naruto was in the middle of a reconnaissance mission that had an almost one hundred percent death possibility if he was caught.
You know gaki, now that I think about it, this song really grows on you.
Shut up, Kyuubi.
The great beast laughed. The look on that infidel's face when you asked him to stop playing the song is priceless.
Naruto remembered that. How could he not when the scene passed behind his eyes the instant the Youma said that? The horror on the man's features coupled with the discreet looks of relief that crossed his teammates faces, then the reversal of expressions when the man refused. An invisible shiver worked it's way down his spine.
The Kyuubi laughed again. Gaki, you should play it when we get back.
No way in the Nine Hells, bastard fox. To Naruto's terror, a week after he had finally gotten the song out of his head, Lee, who had heard him humming it under his breath, had gotten him the CD for Christmas, thinking that Naruto liked the song. And in the 'spirit of youth and Christmas', had insisted that he play it for the rest of the day.
It had taken another week to get the damn song out of his head again.
Naruto ducked deeper in to the foliage as he felt a presence nearby, then to his intense dismay, Kyuubi- destroyer of civilizations, strongest being in the entire universe- began to sing the song. Naruto gritted his teeth, wincing as the Youma's deep bass voice sang- badly- out of tune.
Shut up, you infernal, over-powered flea bag! He screeched at the demon, his own tone capable of bending metal if it had been spoken out loud. This only served to encourage the demon further, however, and he began to sing louder, laughter evident in his voice. Naruto was beginning to get a migraine.
To take his mind off of the demon, he decided it was time to switch positions. Stealthily, he moved closer the missing-nins' base, almost praying to get caught, if only for the distraction it would provide. He stopped however, when he heard a couple of the guards.
"You know I just heard this new song the other day. It's really good, goes something like this…" And before Naruto had a chance to cover his ears, because he just knew what was coming, the guard began to sing that song. The song that was the bane of Naruto's very existence at the moment.
The Kyuubi began singing along with the nukenin, and for Naruto it was like hearing the song in stereo- horrible, horrible stereo- and suddenly he began to see red. He just couldn't take it anymore!
Leaping out of the bushes with a speed that was fueled by his annoyed frustration, and the Kyuubi's chakra, he jammed a kunai into the man's chest, abruptly cutting off the song at both ends. He heaved a mental sigh of relief, then jumped back as the man's partner attacked. Still angry, he threw a couple of shuriken at the other nukenin with enough force that they could have cut a tree in the Forest of Death in half. But the damn bastard didn't have the decency to die quietly.
No matter. Fighting was a good stress reliever, and Naruto had a lot of stress.
Tsunade sat behind her desk, looking over the report that Naruto handed to her. She then took the time to look him over. He was drenched head to toe in blood, but she was unable to read his expression due to his ANBU mask. The mission had been to see if the group of missing-nin would be a threat and Tsunade couldn't help but think, Not that they matter anymore.
She sighed, glancing again at the report. "Naruto, your mission had been to stay hidden and gather information. What, pray tell, made you to decide to reveal your presence and slaughter the entire encampment?"
His response was definitely not one she was expecting.
"They were singing."
Tsunade sighed againand Naruto's partners flinched.
In the back of his mind as Tsunade moved on, Naruto could hear the Kyuubi snicker in amusement.
As they left the Hokage's office, Naruto was discussing with Kyuubi the perfect prank (this was how he kept the demon from going through his thoughts, after all foxes were natural tricksters). Suddenly, he snatched the sound of a tune that the secretary was humming.
Later, the secretary reported that the last thing he remembered was a frustrated growl and a black and white blur, before waking up in the hospital.