Don't own this….

Rin

Rin stood at the gates of the estate her hands before her nervously pulling at the loose folds of her kimono. Biting her lip she looked on ahead and saw that her lord was approaching. Even at this distance one could tell that he was a man of power, of influence and prestige. Not a common or ordinary man by any stretch of the imagination. Tonight he was returning home after a rather long excursion in the east and she could tell just subtly that her lord was tired. Though she would never allow him to know how she could read his subtle behavior, that belied how he felt. It pleased her to know that after so many years she could. And doubted that another ever would.

Jaken stood at her side and cleared his throat, a warning to her to be on her best behavior. This she knew of course after so many years and having gone through this welcoming many times before. She was twenty now, and had traveled with her lord for many years before he deemed that she was to be a 'Lady' and that women of her class should be in the home, addressing the servants not blindly chasing after him.

She recalled it as though it were yesterday when he had informed her that she was to stay behind as he prepared for a mission.

"Not this time Rin, you will remain here". he said quietly to her, not even bothering to look her in the eye. Whenever he told her no, and that was rare she would turn up those big brown watery eyes and he felt it tug at his demon heart. A heart he steadfastly told himself he did not have.

"But milord, I want to go…I'm not a child!" she insisted, on her way to tears. He always indulged her. At sixteen she could carry a weapon and defend herself, he neednt worry that she would be some kind of liability.

"That is my point Rin, you are a not a child anymore. You will stay behind and look after my home in my absence. My servants are at your disposal and know to heed your words with regard to my home as though the order came from me. Is this clear?" he asked still faced away from her his eyes on the growing sunset. Rin bit her lip in defiance and turned her face up in a twisted scowl.

He smiled briefly to himself, knowing from experience that she was biting her lip and pouting. He shut his eyes," Pouting is no way for a Lady to act Rin. My words are final, stay here". he said and then he began to walk off into the coming night. It took Rin a moment to realize that he had complimented her in his own way giving her the title of 'Lady'. It was a great honor to be given such a name, and she found that it made her feel somewhat better about being left behind. But still her heart yearned to be out in the wilds with him free and unharnessed. And from then on she dreamed of the day in which they might return.

That had been four years ago now and she had settled into her life in his home with all the grace she knew how. She had tended to his servants, knowing each one by name. Never allowing herself to sit idle, she would help in the kitchens, in the fields. Sit for long hours at a time in the garden, ride A-un and above all remain herself. The title of Lady never effected her as she would have thought.

Again the little demon at her side cleared his throat and she smacked her lips in defiance and looked down towards him, "Master Jaken, I will be on my best behavior. You needn't do that again. Please have some faith in me!". she spat, twisting her fingers in her garments even more.

The little demon gave a deep sarcastic sigh, "Yes just as well that I remind you. Milord will be very tired from his trip and doesn't need you hanging on to him asking him all kinds of silly, stupid , human questions!"

"I'm well aware Master Jaken, I wouldn't do that…." she said as she looked on ahead, Sesshomaru was close now and would reach them very soon. The moon began to peek out from a patch of velvet clouds and she turned to look at him off in the distance. She sighed when she saw that he practically glowed in the glowing light from the moon, his kimono shining like the gloss of a sea shell. His long pale hair drifting behind him, twisting elegantly in the wind. And nothing could be said for his amber eyes that caught small patches of light and glowed like gold gems.

Jaken heard her swoon but didn't have time to reprimand her for her behavior before Sesshomaru stood before the two of them. Rin instantly bowed at him, casting her eyes down as though he were the presence of some higher power. Jaken smiled at her actions and turned his face brightly towards his master before following suit with a deep respectful bow. The dog demon simply stared at the both of them, he had been expecting this kind of a greeting it was something done now as was in the past too many times to count. Rin slowly raised her head and looked him in the eyes, a bright smile on her face.

"Welcome home Sesshomaru-sama."

"Rin". came the smooth voice of her master. It amazed her how he used her name to voice a hello, or a good bye or a even a lecture. Just with her name alone. To an outsider it might seem rude but it was only his way, and it expressed everything without really revealing anything.

"Welcome home milord, how were the talks? I trust the negotiations went well…." rambled the toad demon as he walked beside his lord now headed onto the grounds. Rin watched them move away and then followed a few steps behind. Her hands still fidgeting with the folds of her elegant Kimono. Sesshomaru spoke very little to his toad companion only nodded as he kept his golden eyes fixed and straight ahead. In fact he seemed to be ignoring the both of them when he suddenly spoke changing the entire direction of his 'conversation' with the toad demon.

"Rin, stop that". he said his voice even but held the all the warning that she heed him. Rin gasped as she looked up at him and found that she still held the material in her hands twisting even more at his warning, as it made her that much more nervous. She didn't know why she was suddenly feeling this way. It wasn't like she hadn't seen him before. The truth was some time ago, within the last few years she found that when she looked at him her heart beat quickened, her breath came to her in short breaths, her stomach felt like a field of butterflies.

She really wasn't sure what it meant, it wasn't fear of him. She surmised already that she could never fear her lord, no matter how many times she had seen his eyes turn red or his fangs bared at an enemy. No, it wasn't fear….it was…

This time he stopped but did not turn to face her. His delicate nose picked up the scent of something very out of place on his young ward. It was past fear, he knew that. Rin never had cause to fear him and he had never raised a hand or fang in her direction. It was something else, something he had long since feared would happen one day the longer she stayed with him. He'd seen it coming, and didn't understand why he hadn't sent her away yet.

"Milord?" asked Jaken awestruck at his masters sudden change in stance. Rin felt her heart quicken as he stood there and she sensed his aura, it was questioning reaching out to her. Having been around him since childhood she could tell when he was reading her, as he was now. She was mindful enough to place her hands at her side and reprimand her self to keep her hands still and not fidget. That's when he turned to face her, his features blank as always revealing nothing.

"Jaken leave us".

The toad demon looked downhearted as he turned to look up at his master and then followed his stoic gaze at Rin. He made a frown as he stared at her, stupid human! Always interfering in his conversations with Lord Sesshomaru. He knew why she was so nervous around his master, it wouldn't have been hard to see even if one were blind. The stupid girl had allowed herself to start loving the dog demon, far beyond that of childish fantasy but that of a mature woman. Long had he too seen this day coming, perhaps now his lord would show her her proper place. Pull her out of her fantasy and back into the real world and its very real rules and guidelines. Yes, this was what she needed a wake up call.

Satisfied with his own conclusions he bowed to his lord and walked away. Rin watched the toad demon leave only breaking eye contact with her lord but briefly and when she turned back to face him she felt her stomach give a great lurch at his suddenly intense gaze. What must he be thinking, why was he looking at me like that she pondered.

She wasn't a child anymore he could never argue that. He wouldn't allow himself to admit it but she had grown from a poor street urchin of a child into a beautiful woman. Her large hazel brown eyes had squared out a bit and were now soft around the edges and delicate. Her dark brown hair that was always wild an unkempt as a child was now a smooth and long and cascaded down her back almost knowing no end. Her skin he noticed had also changed though he never touched her or knew for certain but it seemed so soft and precious like it would break in the softest wind storm. The very Kimono she now wore was so simple, a deep red….and yet it showed off her curves in a way no other he felt could encapture.

"Milord….?" she nervously asked after a long moment, he had been staring at her. He pulled himself together quickly and snapped his mask of indifference back on and frowned. Her scent had changed in the years he had looked after her, as a woman there was now a scent that spoke of maturity and arousal and he was still quite uncertain as to how to address such a thing.

He decided to cut straight to the point, "Rin stop this". Confused she looked up at him and tossed her head from side to side denying whatever he was implying. She knew her lord was a far smarter creature than she, and he too could read her and her every thought as though it were the pages of some book.

"Milord I….don't know what your are referring to…I…" she began knowing she was dancing around the edges of a sure lie. She would never lie to him outright, nor had she ever but she couldn't confirm his suspicions. It was just too shameful, and he would surely send her away if he knew.

"Would you make a fool of this Sesshomaru?" he asked his left brow raising in interest awaiting her eminent reaction. He kept his voice even and gauged her reaction as he spoke. Her scent was rising again and he wondered. "Oh no..no Lord Sesshomaru! I would never do such a thing. I respect you…" she insisted.

"Very good, then I would advise you to give up these," and he tried to find the right words without giving anything away, "longings…." he finally said. Rins brown eyes turned up sharply and she felt her stomach give a mighty flip and her feet seem to be glued to the spot on which she stood. He knew…..of course he knew. There was little that he didn't know of the world, of demons and humans. She could try however feeble to deny it, she wanted to so badly if only to lift this veil that was slowly falling between them….it would change everything and she wasn't ready for that yet.

"Milord I have no such desires. I am grateful for your safe return home and look forward to being of assistance in making sure you arrival home is met with nothing but the best. I assure you milord." She couldn't believe her own words she was speaking so quickly as though forcing the words from her own lips but she did what she thought was best. What she knew he would want to hear. While inside she was crying alone in a corner of her room. Ashamed to know that he knew how she felt. She could kick herself for being so damned obvious. But it was like staring into the eyes of the sun or trying to deny herself air by trying to lie to him. Or convincing herself other wise that she didn't love him far beyond that of a child, but as a woman. It was maddening. All the while the great demon lord stared on at her with a face as cool as a still pond. It never wavered and gave away nothing. For a second Rin felt a slight tinge of fear spike within her, it passed through her and was gone in an instant. The way his cold amber eyes looked down at her reading her every gesture, the flash of her eyes the pulse in her delicate throat all open and exposed to him like she was a deer about to be caught.

He said nothing and turned away headed towards his estate and Rin watched him leave, her legs about to give way underneath her. It bothered her that he said nothing more on the matter, perhaps that was his way of saying that the matter was resolved. But she knew him far better than that. She knew he didn't believe her and maybe he was unwilling himself to delve deeper into such a discussion. By walking away it could be like nothing was ever said but understood none the less. She would have stood there all night and stared in the direction he had taken had he not bid her to follow him. Snapping out of her haze at the sound of his melodiously deep voice she straightened herself up and followed him.

That night there was a large welcoming feast for the lord who only ever ate among his household but on occasions when he was returning home. The table was filled mostly with demons who were in his personal guard while he was away, demons all of them. Warriors who served his family for generations. Rin sat just to the left of him, at a respectful distance so as not to state that she was his lady, but as a show to all those at the table that she was to be respected in his household. It amazed her the older she got how much his unsaid actions such as this spoke of what he thought of her.

Every demon at the table knew to give her nothing but respect and always they would treat her as such. Each demon at the table individually spoke of their wanted regard for her safety while he was away. Rin was pleased to know that she wasn't alone when he was gone and that she would be protected, but none of it compared to what it felt like to be protected by the lord himself. For Sesshomaru was so imposing to all those in his territory that no demon or human dare step out of line or even attempt to disrespect him or those in his household. It would have been their death.

And so Rin sat beside her lord and ate her supper with mild interest waiting for the moment when she could be alone in her room. To mull over her feelings and try her best to either abandon her feelings for her lord, or else convince herself to put on a better mask to hide them. A mask to rival his own. Deep down she knew neither would work but it became her resolve to try from this night on. Sesshomaru of course never spoke at the meal, he merely nodded and raised his sake cup whenever something was said in his honor.

It amazed her that he was a man of so few words, whose actions always spoke much more highly than anything he might ever voice. When diner was concluded Rin watched the servants gather in each one bowed to him when some kind of eye contact was made and cleared away the remains of the feast. While her lord had been away she had worked along side them in the preparation, clearing and clean up of meals. But she knew that if she were to do this now her lord might get angry with the servants as he would never be so with her. So she sat still until he advise her that she could go.

"You may go now Rin". he said slowly. She smiled at him and bowed, "Thank you Milord". she said and smoothed out her dark Kimono and stood prepared to leave when he spoke again. It was rare for him to strike up a conversation after diner like this and she tried to clear her mind from earlier that evening when his very eyes seemed to dissect her.

"Did you enjoy your food Rin?" he asked. Rin had to blink a few times before registering his question. What an odd thing to ask, the food in his house was legendary in its preparation, always of the highest quality. What kind of strange game was he playing at she thought. Looking away shyly she gave him her answer. "Milord's table is always of the highest caliber milord, I enjoyed my meal".

"Hmm". he said with a nod and took a slow sip from his sake cup. Confused by his question she bowed again before leaving him. A thousand questions thundering through her brain as she left when she heard him speak yet again. Her hand on the screen door she turned to face him.

"I will have tea in the study this evening".

"Yes milord". she replied carefully before finally leaving the dining hall, shutting the door behind her she knew what he meant. When ever he arrived back home from a long trip he would have diner with his subjects and have tea in his study. And since she was but a child she was the only one who brought it to him. She was amazed that he was even allowing her to do so after their awkward conversation of only a few hours ago. And so she turned to head to the kitchens to brew the pot herself. With questions ever pressing on her mind.

TBC….

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