I think Warren and Layla were having an argument. I'm not sure, I just wrote it down as I heard it. Teenagers are crazy. God bless them all.
SPATHippie freak.
Goth poser.
Tree hugger.
Frankenstein.
Why are you bothering me?
I like you, stupid.
You like stupid? Isn't that your boyfriend?
Yes, that's you.
I am NOT your boyfriend.
Even after Saturday night?
Nothing happened Saturday night.
You're in denial.
Nothing to deny.
Kiss me.
Make me.
You'll regret that.
(Swift as lightning, she grabs his shirt, pulls it up and blows on his muscular stomach, producing a loud farting sound)
Are you nuts?
Kiss me.
Bite me.
Not until you kiss me first.
Leave me alone.
That's not what you said Saturday.
People are looking.
Let them look.
I don't like people looking at me.
Why not? You're very handsome. A lot of girls like to look at you. Some boys do to.
You're not Layla.
No?
No, you're her evil twin from the Mirror Universe.
Oooo, are we a closet trekkie?
Don't mention me and "closet" ANYTHING.
Your eyes are glowing.
You're causing it.
I know. I love when your eyes glow.
Okay, you've been exposed to red kryptonite. It's messed you up like it did Clark.
Clark needed to blow off some steam. Besides, he's not as big a cutie as you.
Don't…call…me… "cutie".
Okay, "handsome young stallion". Is that better?
People can hear us.
I don't think so.
(Turns to the passersby in the cafeteria)
HEY EVERYBODY! WARREN WAS AT MY HOUSE LAST SATURDAY!
Shut up.
HE MET MY PARENTS; THEY THINK HE'S GREAT!
Please shut up.
AFTER THEY WENT TO BED WE PLAYED "ADAM & EVE"!
God, please kill me.
"IT'S LIKE TRUTH OR DARE, BUT YOU EITHER TAKE A BITE OF APPLE AND DO THE DARE OR TAKE OFF A PIECE OF CLOTHING!
If you are a just and merciful God, PLEASE kill me now.
WARREN DIDN'T BITE THE APPLE ONCE!
I'm still alive.
HE'S NOT ALLERGIC TO APPLES!
There is no God.
AND HIS WRISTS AREN'T THE ONLY THINGS HE HAS TATTOOS ON!
(He grabs her and kisses her long and hard)
Did that shut you up?
Was that so hard?
Why are you doing this?
I'm a crazy redhead in love. Maybe it's the red kryptonite talking.
I wish you'd both shut up.
Want me to shut up?
Yes.
Shut me up.
You'll regret that.
(They kiss again)
The End