Author's Note: The original version of this story is on another site,
I've added a new beginning and ending to it, and have made some other
small and basically insignificant changes to it. Let me know what you
think of the prologue and the first chapter. :D
A Hobbit Fairy Tale
Prologue:
"Tell us the story again Grandmam!" Two tweenaged hobbits sat at their grandma's feet, looking up at her in rapture. "Please?"The youngest one pleaded. The elderly hobbit laughed and settled in her favorite rocker by the fire.
"But I've told it to you so many times, dearhearts, that you should be able to tell the story to me. Isn't there another, more suitable, story you'd like to hear. I don't know that your grand-uncle would like the sordid details of his life to be heard by young, impressionable ears." The two tweens pouted. The youngest piped up suddenly, a bright, hopeful gleam in her eyes.
"That never stopped you before, Grandmam Pearl!" They looked at their
grandmam hopefully, thier bright green eyes sparkling in the firelight.
The old hobbit sighed in defeat.
"All right children, gather 'round close. The story begins like this:
"Once upon a time, there lived a lad in a beautiful place called the
Shire, who was in love. This lad was unlike other lads. He didn't know
that he was in love, nor that the one he loved also loved him. He was
a very good lad, son of a very important gentlehobbit and heir to that
position. His love was also a very important hobbit, but he was rarely
called a 'good lad'. Normally people called him the 'fool of a Took,
especially when he got himself, and his friend, in trouble. But he
always seemed to get them both out of it. This is the tale of their
love and the roller-coaster ride they went on to get there.
"Their tale begins on a lovely April day in a majestic wood, with the two friends and a startling revelation…"
Chapter 1
Merry gaped open-mouthed at the sight before him. He didn't mean to be a peeping Tom; he was only hiding up in this particular tree because it was one of the few that his eldest Took cousin, Pearl, hadn't caught him in. He was just beginning to relax when a noise in the bushes below alerted him. Merry watched, in silent fascination as his dearest cousin, Pippin, darted out from behind a bunch of bushes and stopped in the clearing that Merry's tree overlooked. The clearing was completely secluded from the path that lay about six feet to the right, far enough for a little privacy, but close enough so as you don't lose your way. Pippin glanced around three or four times as if he were looking for intruders, but he didn't look up. If he had looked up, and looked hard enough to see beyond the foliage, Pippin would have seen his cousin up in the tree. But Pippin seemed to Merry to be slightly preoccupied.
Pippin checked again to make sure he was alone, gave an urgent little
sigh and unceremoniously dropped his drawers, as the saying goes.
Merry almost audibly gasped. Here was his twenty-one year old cousin
about to 'relieve his tension' as his da called it, and here Merry was
stuck in a tree above him like a pervert. 'What am I doing,' he
thought, trying to find some way out of this situation. He looked down
without thinking when he heard Pippin moan, ever so softly, and was
captivated by the scene before him.
Pippin was lying on the ground, completely disregarding the hard feel
of it. His eyes were half shut and his head was thrown back as he
moved his hand up and down his erection. He was already flushed and
starting to breath heavily, little pants and moans escaping his lips.
Merry watched in agonized silence, unable to look away, as Pippin's
breathing became harder and his movements faster and jerkier. Sweat
broke out on his face and he began to undulate his hips in time with
the thrusts of his hand. His moans became more urgent, louder and more
full of the need that was driving him at that moment. Merry felt his
breathing getting heavier and he realized that watching Pippin
pleasure himself was making him hard. He forgot in that moment that it
was wrong that he was watching his cousin, his male cousin, and that
he shouldn't be having this problem by watching another boy tend to
himself. He ground his hips hard into the tree to keep himself from
getting overly excited, too entranced by the sight below him to even
think about looking away.
Pippin was nearing his climax at that point. He was breathing like he'd just run a mile and the sweat trickled down his face. He bit his bottom lip and closed his eyes, his movements becoming erratic as his passion crested.
"Merry," he whispered, his voice full of urgency and raw need. "Oh,
Merry!" Merry froze up in the tree, his eyes wide and his mouth
hanging open slightly. He'd stopped breathing for a moment and his
heart skipped a beat. Pippin's climax ended and he lay there still
panting, unable to move for a second. Merry's whole world had stopped;
his brain couldn't process what had just happened. After a very long,
silent pause, with the only sounds in the clearing being Pippin's
calming breaths and Merry's own light breathing, Pippin heaved a sigh,
wiped the sweat off of his face, cleaned himself off a little and put
his trousers back on. He then moved away from his previous spot and
sat down against the tree opposite Merry's. He sat down heavily and
drew his legs up, bowing his head so that his tousled curls covered
his face. A moment later soft, barely audible sobs broke the pregnant
silence and Merry realized that Pippin was crying. He looked the very
portrait of misery, crouched alone with his face covered, crying so
heartbrokenly that Merry just wanted to hold him and tell him that
everything would be all right.
But Merry knew that he couldn't comfort Pippin for two obvious reasons: one, he would have to tell Pippin that he'd been in that tree the entire time and that would probably embarrass Pippin and lead to awkward questions, questions Merry didn't quite want to know the answer to. And two, Merry didn't know how to react to what he'd just witnessed, he didn't know what to say to comfort Pippin or to understand why Pippin was crying. Which would lead to the same awkward questions. And that realization that Pippin was crying alone because of him and he could do nothing about it broke Merry's heart.
Pippin's sobs dwindled down to sniffles and he finally looked up after a while. He wiped his eyes and nose and leaned back to look at the sunlight streaming through the trees. He closed his eyes for a moment and felt the soft breeze blow through his hair. Then he sighed and opened his eyes again.
"I don't know when I started feeling this way about him," he said
softly to a curious blue jay that had landed on a bush near him. "I
guess I've always loved him and it's just now become something more.
It's just, every time he looks at me I get shivers and sometimes I
dream about him and dream that he knows and he doesn't hate me and he
tells me that he's felt the same way all along." Pippin sighed again
and put his hand on his forehead. "And sometimes I want to tell him,
just burst out and say to him that I love him as more than a cousin
and, at moments like those, it just feels like a dam about ready to
burst. It's like the pressure of holding it in is going to kill me…
and then he smiles in that way of his and my heart breaks because I
know he'll never forgive me for my feelings and he'll hate me for
being so, so… Tookish." He looked miserably at the jay and was silent
for a moment.
"What should I do?" he burst out suddenly. "I can't go on like this;
stealing moments to think about him and pretend that it's him I'm
feeling touching me. Oh, lord, if he knew, he'd hate me I know it.
He'd be disgusted with me and leave me all alone for the rest of my
life and I'd go through my life broken and useless to everyone. I
just… I think about telling him and then an image of me without him,
even just having him as a friend is better than nothing, and I see
myself as I would be without him to comfort me when I'm sick or sad,
or do stupid things with that we know will get us into trouble, and I
see myself getting into that kind of trouble and this time, he's not
there to get me out of it, he's not there to reason my father out of
killing his only son and heir. Oh, life would be wretched without
him!" Tears welled up in his eyes and he let escape a loud sob that
scared the blue jay away. Pippin buried his face in his hands and was
sobbing so hard that he didn't hear Merry climb silently out of the
tree and walk down the path a little ways. So when Merry startled
Pippin out of his pity, it looked to Pippin like Merry had been
walking from the path and had heard him crying.
"What's this, Pippin? Why are you crying out here, all alone," he asked when he got closer to Pippin. His heart wrenched with guilt when Pippin's head shot up and Merry saw the fresh tears and the red swollen eyes. Pippin quickly dried his eyes and sat there, not looking at Merry.
"Why was you crying, dear heart?" Merry crouched down beside Pippin,
putting a comforting arm around him. "Whatever it is, you can tell me
and I'll see if I can't make it better. Did you get in trouble with
your da again?" Pippin shook his head. "Then, what is it?"
Pippin looked up at Merry for a moment and fresh tears came to his eyes. He mumbled something inaudible and Merry sighed.
"Pippin, dearest, I can't hear you when you mumble. Just tell me. If it's bad, I won't tell anyone, I swear." He crossed his heart with his right hand, just like Pippin used to make him do when Pippin was a child and had a secret to tell him. Pippin shook his head again.
"Don't make a promise you can't keep, Meriadoc Brandybuck," he said softly. Merry frowned.
"I always keep my promises unless circumstances prevent me from
keeping them, Peregrin Took. Now what is it that makes you cry so"
Pippin looked questioningly into Merry's eyes and, seeing no
dishonesty, took a deep breath and prepared to lie. "Pippin," Merry
said, knowing his cousin all too well. "No lies. I want the truth"
Pippin exhaled sharply.
"Oh, Merry," he said for a second time that day, though in an entirely different manner than he had before. "If I told you, you'd hate me forever," he said in a heartbroken voice. Merry snorted.
"I couldn't hate you if I tried, you impetuous Took. Why not tell me
and get it off of your chest?" Pippin bowed his head for a moment,
composing himself and considering.
"I'm a bad hobbit," he said suddenly. Merry frowned. What Pippin had been doing wasn't considered 'bad', only a simple fact of nature.
"How are you a bad hobbit," Merry asked encouragingly. Pippin sighed.
"I… when I… when I 'tend to myself', I don't…" Pippin stopped,
suddenly gripped again by that fear of rejection. He bit his lower lip
and squeezed his eyes shut and wouldn't say anything else.
"What don't you do when you tend your needs, Pip," Merry asked quietly. Pippin kept his eyes squeezed shut.
"I don't think about lasses, Merry," he whispered, a delicate blush spreading across his cheeks. "I… I think about you." He mumbled the last two words and Merry didn't quite catch them.
"What Pip?"
"I think about you, Merry," Pippin spat out and the he turned quickly away from his cousin's still form, tears yet again tracing paths down his cheeks from his tightly closed eyes. Merry gasped audibly. Hearing it straight from Pippin's mouth to him was an entirely different thing than overhearing it said to a blue jay. Merry stuttered for a moment trying to find something to say, but before he could formulate words Pippin spoke again, letting all of his feelings come out in a rush of breath, much like the dam he'd made an analogy to earlier.
"I can't stop myself from thinking of you like this and I know it's
wrong, and that I would disgrace the family if they ever knew and I
knew you'd hate me for feeling this and I can't… I don't know how to
keep these feelings from coming over me and I think I must be a
terrible hobbit for being this way, and I'm sure that you hate me now
but I just wanted to tell you, I just had to tell you that I love you
more than anything else in Middle-Earth, even more than all six meals,
and I simply can't stop myself from loving you and wanting you in
this disgraceful way!" It took Merry a moment to comprehend this
whirlwind of an intense emotional outburst.
"Well, Pippin, I don't really know what to say," he said finally. He
turned Pippin to face him and urged him to open his eyes. "I don't
hate you, Pippin. And I'm sure that, while this is quite unheard of,
you're not the first and not the last hobbit to feel this way. But I'm
not saying it's right," Merry said to stop Pippin from gaining a false
hope. "I don't want to hurt your feelings, Pippin, and I do love you,
just… not in the same way." Pippin's face fell and tears came to his
eyes for the fifth time in as many minutes and he looked away. "Now,
Pippin," Merry continued, the words coming from his mouth before he
thought of them. "You'll have to find some way to stop yourself from
feeling like this. If the only way you can do that is by not having me
around, then I shall have to leave for a while…" Merry stopped at the
stunned horror on Pippin's face as the very thing he'd dreaded came
spouting out of Merry's mouth.
"Merry," Pippin said weakly. "Merry… no. Please," he pleaded despondently. "Don't leave me alone." Merry, for fear of his own reaction to Pippin's previous show and his heart's reaction to Pippin's revelation and in pure blind panic of his father, made the decision that would change everything. He had to push Pippin away.
"I am leaving, Peregrin Took," he said in his grown up voice. "It's
for your own good. I'll be leaving for Buckland as soon as I walk back
to the Smials. I don't know if I'll ever be back." Pippin flinched at
the harshness and unintended cruelty in Merry's voice. "Goodbye,
Peregrin," Merry said as he got up and turned to walk away, leaving
Pippin standing there staring after him in silent shock with tears
coursing down his face. As Merry disappeared from sight back onto the
path, Pippin's legs gave out as the shock wore off and the harsh cold
reality of Merry's rejection hit him like a great cave troll from
Cousin Bilbo's stories. His breath came out in a great whoosh and his
brain went numb as he felt pain--real physical pain--course through
his body. He slumped to the ground and the last thing he said before
the world went dark was a whispered, "Merry."