The Marauders' Papers
Bits and pieces from the Marauder Era
collected to understand what exactly happened at Hogwarts during the time of
Remus Lupin, James Potter, Sirius Black, and Peter Pettigrew.
Told entirely through notes, detention slips, homework, essays, etc.
-Reposted to revise.-
--Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling isthe genius, not me.--
Excerpt from Remus Lupin's Divination Homework
Remus Lupin
Describe your surroundings: Well, I'm in the Gryffindor common room. A fire is burning in the fireplace. James is talking to Lily she doesn't look too thrilled. Sirius is jumping on the sofa like he usually does at exactly 6:04 p.m.. Peter is laughing at him. It's dark outside, looks like it might start raining soon. Lily just slapped James across the face...again. Now she stalked out of the room muttering something about James's big head. James is now sulking in an armchair. Sirius has now gotten off the sofa and is trying to cheer James up...doesn't seem to be working, really.
How could this affect your future? Seeing as the clouds have begun to set in that obviously means rain tonight.
Transfiguration Class
Hi Moony
What do you want Padfoot?
No need to be so snappy
Sorry, I'm just trying to pay attention, you should try it sometime.
Like you need to pay attention. You've read the chapter three times already!
But the book doesn't explain it as well as McGonagall does.
What is not listening to ONE lesson going to do to you Remus? hmmmmm?
Cost me five questions on O.W.L.s.
Education disgusts me. As do you Remus...you and your learning.
Well then why don't you stop bugging me and write to someone else?
Maybe I will!
Jamsie! You'll write to me!
Of course Sirius, paying attention is over rated.
Exactly! So Prongs, how are ya buddy?
Just dandy. And you, Padfoot my friend?
I'm great! Thanks for asking. And do you know why I'm so great?
Because there's a whole bunch of Slytherins sitting in front of us, meaning that they are all within aim of our wands? And that McGonagall is distracted in her office?
Well actually it was because I ate pudding at lunch. But, your reason works just as well!
Detention
Culprit(s): James Potter and Sirius Black
Crime: For transfiguring five Slytherin students into chimpanzees.
Punishment: Two rolls of parchment on why transfiguring fellow students is dangerous.
Additional Comments: Why chimpanzees?
Signed: Minerva McGonagall
Detention once again Padfoot?
I thought you had to pay attention...
Sirius...
Yes Remus
Class is over
Oh...
Potions Class
Evans...darling...how are you?
Stop writing to me, Potter.
I'll stop writing to you if you'll go out with me
How many times do I have to tell you to leave me alone?
Come on Evans...what's one little trip to Hogsmead with me going to hurt?
NO POTTER! LEAVE ME ALONE!
You know you want to...
Come on Evans write back.
I'm not going to stop until you write something
Are you getting tired of me throwing this paper at you yet?
Now?
Now?
James, leave the girl alone...smoke is starting to come out of her ears...and we all know what will happen to you if she gets too mad.
She'll crack any day now and realize her true feelings for me.
That's what you said last time.
Your point?
That was the matchbox incident.
We needn't to mention that.
Excerpt from James Potter's Journal
Dear Journal,
Lily looked at me today, with those beautiful...mesmerizing...brilliant green eyes. Sure her eyes were filled with anger and fury...but deep down we all know she loves me. Remus is now reading over my shoulder. I'm telling him to go away but the boy just won't listen. Now Sirius is coming over too. They won't leave me alone. Sirius is trying to get this away– from–me– I like pudding! Ignore that. That was Sirius. He's a git. Anyways onto the other important things of my day.
Three Ravenclaws joined the OJPASBFC. That stands for the Obsessive James Potter And Sirius Black Fan Club. I'm not even kidding you...it's a real club...they have badges and everything. It's a little scary sometimes. I even think Remus has a fan club. He just doesn't like to admit it. I think it consists of the quiet girls in the library.
I'm working on a new technique to achieve ultimate hair scruffiness. It's the latest thing.
Defense Against The Dark Arts Class
Hullo Wormtail!
Hi Sirius.
Did you happen to take notes for History of Magic yesterday?
I think so
Would you mind letting me take an oh so tiny look at them?
What happened to copying off of Moony?
He hexed me...said something about me taking advantage of his brain...which is not true in the slightest way.
Sure you can barrow mine
Never mind Pete, I can't seem to read your handwriting
Don't worry, neither can I.
An excerpt from the assignment for Sirius Black and James Potter
Why not to transfigure slimy, gross, disgusting, and revolting, Slytherins into Chimpanzees.
By Sirius Black and James Potter
McGonagall we realized that you assigned each of us our OWN assignment however we found it pointless. You see Sirius and I share the same brain so in order to not waste parchment, we've decided to write the essay together. We suppose we shouldn't transfigure fellow students (even though they are utterly repulsive) because it's...um...against the school rules...and...it can cause a great deal of damage to the people (I wouldn't call them people...they're more like things) and...it's not nice. Now McGonagall we'd like to inform you of all the reasons we SHOULD transfigure them into chimpanzees.
1. Nobody likes them...not even you McGonagall...yes we've realized you don't like Slytherins.
2. They'd do it to everyone else, if they had the skill.
3. They look better as monkeys anyways.
Excerpt from Sirius Black's Divination Homework
Sirius Black
Describe Your Surroundings: I'm in Divination class right now, about 30 seconds before I have to turn this assignment in. I can see Remus; he's reading a book...figures. James is busy finishing up on this assignment too...what a coincidence. Peter is staring blankly at the ceiling. There are armchairs all over the place...wait...I have no need to describe this classroom, you're in it all the time, Professor Melina.
How could this affect your future? I'll die tomorrow? I don't know...is that what you want me to write?
Excerpt From Remus Lupin's Defense Against the Dark Arts assignment
Remus Lupin
Describe a Werewolf: R-E-M-U-S L-U-P-I-N
Excerpt From James Potter's Defense Against the Dark Arts assignment
James Potter
Describe a Werewolf: A really nice and smart guy who can do just about anything. I'm serious, he can...like this one time he was able to help Sirius conquer his fear of pixies. Now THAT'S a miracle. Sirius has always been afraid of pixies, ever since they stole his pocket mirror and broke it. So...yes... a werewolf is an unlucky person who is in the wrong place at the wrong time, like someone I know.
A/N: I hope this fanfiction has amused some of you. Feel free to read through my two other fanfictions. Oh, and reviews would be greatly appreciated. :)