Dan, the Tactician with the Master Plan(s)
By DarthMarth
A Disclaimer: I don't own Fire Emblem, or any part of it. That's right, I don't even have the game and with only a few hours of experience playing a friend's cart, I'm able to write fanfics about it. :P Go me. I do, however, own my stories, so hands off.
Chapter the First-Battle Preparations
Dan the tactician sat hunched over at his pine desk, intently studying his strategy manual. (Intently meaning both that he was absorbed and that he was alone in his tent)
He mumbled to himself as he read, sometimes repeating important lines over again, or just commenting. "Nintendo, I don't know who you are or how you know everything, but I owe you my life..."
With everything he needed to know at his fingertips in his official Fire Emblem player's guide, Dan had finished the tactical preparations for Cog of Destiny mission (as the guide called it-he didn't think the name made an ounce of sense) hours ago. To make sure everyone else didn't suspect anything, he had taken to gazing at the pictures of his female party members and seeing which one looked best. He had narrowed it down to Priscilla and Rebecca when an always-serious voice called at his tent door.
"Tactician Dan, everyone is ready and waiting for another of your amazing, seemingly clairvoyant plans!" Kent said from outside. Dan hurriedly stuffed the guide under his mattress, then went to the tent flap and met Kent.
"Okay, I'm ready," Dan said, slightly breathlessly. "So oblivious..." he muttered to himself.
"What was that, sir?"
"Shut up," Dan said. Kent's prying bugged him, especially since he was in a bad mood-he could tell immediately that chapter 27 was one of the hardest yet, and he'd wracked his aching brain for hours to come up with a plan. Soon, they arrived at the center of the camp, where everyone had gathered expectantly-except Sain, who was walking amongst the ladies of the camp, unsuccessful in his flirts as usual. Kent put his hand to his face and shook his head at his companion's behavior as Fiora slapped Sain hard. Dan stood on a crate the Paladin had set out for him and laid out his strategy.
"Okay, from what I can tell, there are three paths to the shrine from here. Each one is packed with enemy troops."
Marcus, his left leg still in a splint, shifted uneasily in his saddle. "Sir Dan, with all respect, could Sir Oswin or Lord Hector possibly act as a front guard in this engagement? I'm unfit for battle as of this moment, as you can plainly see."
Dan grew frustrated. He'd gleefully utilized Marcus' skill and strength to win engagements back at the beginning of his career with Eliwood, but after he'd failed to grow in strength at all, Dan had been trying to get him killed since chapter 13. So far, he'd failed every time, getting Marcus inordinate amounts of experience and several medals of bravery in the process. Regaining his composure, he continued. "Yes, I was getting to that. Marcus, you will ride unaided up the northwestern path and single-handedly crush the strongholds the enemies' main armor units are... suspected to be in."
Marcus managed not to say any one of hundreds of things he wanted to and just grumbled. "Will I at least get an anti-armor weapon, or an axe,like a Hammer?"
As ifto answer his question, Merlinussuddenly ran up to the gathering, right on schedule. "Dan, Dan! All of our axes have vanished!"
"Oh, that's too bad," Dan said, trying to sound remotely disappointed. The aging Paladin groaned and sunk lower in his saddle. Dan hoped he wouldn't see Bartre, now carrying at least a dozen various axes hung on his belt, giving him a thumbs-up to show the success of his plan.
Pausing to see this, Dan continued. "Heath, you'll take the Delphi Shield and fly over to the town on the other side of the western mountain range and alert the town there. Oh, and stop at the shops to pick up some staves and tomes while you're at it. Fiora and Florina, you'll be accompanying him to help dispose of the myrmidons they're sending-that is, suspected to have. About the ballistae, they probably won't hit you anyway." Young Florina flinched at the mention of the giant bows, and was unassuredly comforted by her also-nervous sister.
"Hector, Nino, Priscilla, Canas, Sain, and Erk will take the northern path and plow through the enemy's cavalry. Wil, Rebecca, and Lyn, you stay to the southeast and wait. Uh, something gonna happen there later. I honestly have no idea what. Eliwood, Ninian, you stand next to each other again doing nothing for a few dozen more turns-that is, a few hours." Grumbling at being ordered around like this, Eliwood was getting annoyed by Dan's last-ditch efforts to get an A support with him and Ninian, even with the promise of spending more time with her, but Dan was too busy wondering what their ending would be like to care.
Dan started wrapping up. "I...have reason to suspect that Lloyd, the White Wolf of the Four Fangs, is the leader of the troops here. Marcus will lead the preliminary charge, and Erk and Canas will team up on him after that. Let's move out!" With his closing words, everyone got up and left for their tents to prepare, Marcus muttering angrily to himself and glaring at the old, beat-up sword he'd been given, Florina practically trembling with fear, and Sain continuing to flirt, having already done his preparations by sleeping in his armor. Dan chuckled as he got slapped again by Rebecca, then went off to give some more last-minute instructions, hoping nervously that no one would get killed this time. No one besides stupid Marcus, anyway.
Coming in Chapter 2: Can Marcus cheat death yet again? How far will Dan go to kill him? Is he sending Florina and Fiora to certain death? How awkward can things get with Eliwood and Ninian? And what will happen when Nino switches Canas' staves around?
And that's the first chapter of my first fanfic ever! Please write some reviews (but no blatant flames) and tell me anything you thought could have been done better, or anything you liked.
...no one reads this part, do they?
Eliwood: And what's with having characters come in and say stuff?
Quiet, you. Go back next to Ninian.
Eliwood: I hate you.