Tomatoesand Labor

By:LivvyWriter

Rating-G or K

Summary- A hilarious telling of how Harry reacts when Hermione announces she's in labor. Includes an angry Hermione, a frazzled Harry, a bubbly Ron, and an insane adventure.

Disclaimer- I do not anything that I reference towards in here, nor do I own Harry Potter.

Thanks to the seven who reviewed the first chapter. I would write a response to each..but I figured you would rather just read the story, so gracias to you seven!

Computer Boy- I'm not a guy, and unfortunately I'm fully aware of the whole guys being complete imbeciles at times..Haha.


Harry sped to the front desk and back to the same bimbo.

"I need you to contact Fred, George, Ginny, and Ron Weasley. And Remus Lupin if you will." Hermione's parents had died in their 7th year at the hand of Voldemort.

Her eyes had just found his scar and her mouth hung open. He rolled his eyes.

"Yes I defeated Voldemort, yes I'm the boy who lived, or whatever they call me these days. But right now, my wife's in labor, and I need my best friend here, or I'll get testy. Don't make me get testy." Harry tried to look as menacing as possible.

Britney closed her mouth rather reluctantly and turned to the large fireplace behind her. Sticking her head in and out twice, she made the calls. She then turned back to Harry and continued to gape. Harry rolled his eyes again and turned around, waiting for Ron and everyone else to arrive.

With a "Crack", 4 people appeared seemingly out of the blue to the untrained eye. Ron, Ginny, Fred, and George stood there.

"Hello mate! Good day isn't it? The birds are chirping! The sun is sparkling! The ground..-" Ron said, his glazed eyes taking in the whole place.

"He's gone crazy.." Ginny said, interrupting her older brother.

Harry looked confused, why was Ron so happy? He looked over at Ron to see him examining his shirt hem.

"Sorry about that Harry, Ron accidentally ate one of our Blissful Bubble Balls." George said, not a hint of apology to his voice.

"He thought it was a normal bubble ball." Fred added.

"He's quite a nitwit." They said simultaneously.

Harry laughed nervously, wondering what would happen when Hermione found out that her best friend was incapable of giving her the support she needed. She would probably take it out on Harry.

"This is gonna be painful…" Harry said, thinking out loud.

Ginny looked at him quizzically. "Her labor I mean. We better get up there, it's room 453." He noticed Remus wasn't there yet.

"If Remus Lupin arrives, can you please tell him what room we're in?" Harry asked Britney. He then noticed she was preoccupied with Ron, who was behind her, twirling her hair and chatting about highlights.

"What did you say this color was? Caramel? It's simply gorgeous! I've been thinking about getting my hair done..maybe a rich brown.." Ron giggled, which brought stares due to the fact that a six foot four man was giggling.

"God Almighty..." Harry said, hitting his head. He motioned for the others to follow and they started walking to room 453.

"He sure is in touch with his feminine side.." Ginny remarked, making a face at her brother.

"That might be because he ate the Woman Blissful Bubble Ball." George admitted.

"Women and men get happy in different ways, so it requires different ingredients, and that results in a different product." Fred finished.

"That's discriminating against women! Not all woman act that way, at least the sensible ones don't." Ginny exclaimed, her hazel eyes lighting up at the insinuation that all women were that way.

"Well considering we based the woman's product on Lavender Brown.." George said, chuckling a bit.

"She gives bad names to women everywhere." Ginny muttered.

"I can't believe he would eat that.." Harry shook his head.

"Oh I do." Ginny laughed as she followed Harry.

They approached a door with the numbers 453 on the door. Harry looked in the small window and saw his wife breathing slowly. The nurse beside her bed held up 9 fingers and Harry mouthed 'Thanks' and then turned back around.

"She's dilated nine centimeters." Harry announced.

"Shouldn't you be in there with her mate?" Fred questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh yeah..that would be a brilliant idea. That way when she asks about Ron, I'll be within strangling distance." Harry began to pace from the doors to rooms 453 and 455.

"All I'm saying is that when Angelina had Ethan and Joshua she wanted me in the room." Fred added, shoving his freckled hands into his well worn trouser pockets.

"Same for me Harry. Alicia almost killed me when our game against Puddlemere United ran late. By the time I got there Emmy was almost born. She was so mad that she wouldn't let me hold her until I actually groveled.." George shook an untidy lock of hair out of his eyes.

"Yeah I know, I know I should be in there. But what if I screw up? I don't want to screw up my baby's first minutes!" Harry plopped down in a squishy chair directly between Hermione's room and the next. Putting his head in his hands, and with the tomato residue still on the side of his head, Harry looked a sorry sight.

Noticing that this was a male bonding thing, Ginny said, "I'm going to go see what Ron's up to and find Remus. I'll be back in a bit." Fred nodded in acknowledgment and then went and stood in front of Harry. George joined him and patted him on the back.

"It's okay mate! Fred and I have been through this. We know exactly how it feels to not want to fail your children, but common! You are bloody you, you don't fail. And especially with baby Potter, with someone that means this much to you." Harry looked up.

"Yeah Harry, if Ron were sane right now, he would tell you exactly what we are. I mean, if Ron can do it, so can the rest of the male population." Fred gave him his hand and Harry grasped it, pulling himself up.

"You're right, thanks guys." Harry turned to go in but stopped at the last minute and said over his shoulder, "If you don't hear from me soon, send a rescue squad."

Laughing, George said "You're on your own mate; after all, it's your fault she's in there in the first place!"

With that Harry entered.


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