So sorry it took so long, but I have a tradition amongst my greater stories… that's right! A blooper reel! For the three or four of you that don't know, a blooper is a mess up or prank on the set of a movie. Bloopers are known for being dumb, funny, outrageous, and just plain weird sometimes. Were you paying close enough attention to get all of these jokes? Find out now! Here's the blooper reel! I don't own Teen Titans! Whoot!
BB Wakes up From Nightmare
Beast Boy turned with a startled sound. "Oh, Rae… I'm sorry I woke you." He quickly wiped his eyes, trying to force up a smile.
"Don't try to hide it." Raven whispered, a softness in her eyes. He hung his head shamefully. "You were dreaming about it again, weren't you?" By it, she meant the Dark Fall. He nodded silently, wiping the sweat from his brow with his discarded nightshirt. He slept in pants only, but now was not the time to think about that. "Come here…" she said soothingly, holding up the blanket so he would climb into bed again. When he got halfway into the bed she grabbed him by the collar and yanked him under the covers. "Gotcha, hottie!" she declared. Beast Boy screamed like a little girl, thrashing to get away. "Ohh… poo." Raven rested her chin on her hand.
"Not again…" The director moans. "Is this another one of those blooper reel things that the author is writing?"
Robin's Dirty Magazines"We're taking an inventory of all the stuff we keep in the attic, Beast Boy." Robin said, looking up from his clipboard. "Getting rid of anything we don't need, making room for other stuff that's gotten outdated."
"Spring cleaning." Raven mumbled from where she hovered. Beast Boy grinned at her dry joke, thankful that he'd rubbed off on her at least a little. "You might want to look and see if there's anything you want to save from the trash heap." She quirked a rather mischievous eyebrow. "I noticed Robin's dirty magazines aren't present here."
Robin turned so red so fast you could've fried an egg on his face. Starfire sighed aloud. "Yes. I was to appear on the cover of Cherri this month." She pouted. Everyone on set who had eyebrows lost them, for they'd shot up so fast. Robin's jaw hit the floor so hard it cracked the pavement, and Beast Boy started giggling like mad. Raven glared at him, but Cyborg was the first one to burst out laughing uncontrollably.
"Cut!" the director shouted.
The White Game Piece Moves By Itself"Raven!" Beast Boy whispered intensely. She turned and looked at the game board. All five Titans watched in silent shock.
The white game piece moved forward, all by itself. Then… it jumped into the air and went right up Raven's nose! "Arrrgh!" Raven flew backward with a scream. The other for Titans roared with laughter, pointing at her.
"Cut! Special effects are in so much trouble!" The director roared, throwing his shouting horn down as he stomped away.
Beast Boy Lectures Robin On the Danger"Let me go." Robin said icily, prying at Beast Boy's fingers. Raven stood, having collected herself at last. "I know we can handle it."
"Could you handle running through a room that's on fire, searching for something smaller than a baseball!" Beast Boy demanded. "Could you handle not knowing if you'll live or die at the turn of the corner! Could you fucking handle a soul-sucking monster all by yourself!"
"Could you handle a rape attempt?" Raven put in softly, drawing near and putting a hand on Beast Boy's shoulder. "Let him go. Ignorance could be useful at this point." He stared at her, then let go of Robin. "He'd gonna die later in the show anyway." She smirked at him.Robin frowned deeply and folded his arms, looking away. The director groaned, slapping his forehead.
Icy Princess?"It's cold…" she whispered in surprise. He entire body started shaking. "Its cold!" She sounded a little more desperate that time. The paleness was working its way up her orange-skinned arms. She staggered suddenly, shaking hard. The team rushed to steady her, but she fell near the board, shaking convulsively. "Friend R-R-Robin…" she whimpered. "It's cold… s-s-so… c-cold……" Robin touched her and recoiled with a cry!
"She's like ice!"
"Ohhh… kya!" An ice cream cone fell out of her shirt, splatting onto the carpet. Everyone cocked an eyebrow.
"Uhm… what the hell, Star?" Cyborg said, staring at it like everyone else.
"I was saving that for later! Do not touch it and get your cooties on it!" Starfire snapped, growling at all of them. Everyone sweat-dropped, knowing how crazy Tameranians got during meals sometimes.
Wrong Dice!"It's my turn." Cyborg said, reaching and picking up the dice. He rattled them in his hand for a moment. "I've got it!" He suddenly stopped. Everyone looked up. "Colonel Mustard in the library with the wrench!" The stared at him, and he frowned. "God, doesn't anyone play Clue anymore…?" he muttered, a little red in the face. He hadn't expected them all to burst out laughing, but still… He dropped the dice.
Clatter.
They landed on… S and H? "Uhm… why are there Boggle dice on the set?" Robin asked.
"Props!" The director shouted. "Where are the dice?"
Beast Boy and Starfire were in the corner, playing a dice game. "Alright…. If I roll a seven or lower I get your metal gauntlet thing." He rolled. Ten. "Damn it…" Starfire grinned at him evilly. "Fine! Fine…" he pulled off his shirt and gave it to her.
"I am victorious!" Starfire had a cat-like smile on as she strode away to sell the shirt on Ebay.
Flashback–Raven's Bra Scene"Raven!" Beast Boy whispered.
"What? What is it?" she picked herself up, wondering if she'd touched something she shouldn't have.
"Your.… your… uhm…!" he looked flabbergasted. He pointed to her breasts, of all things. Cocking an eyebrow and looking down, she let out a gasp. Her bra had SF written on one of the cups! "Those are Starfire's!" Beast Boy exclaimed.
"Ack!" Starfire said from behind camera. "What are you doing with my underthings?" she demanded, rushing onto the set and trying to pull it off of her.
"Quit that!" Raven screeched. "I don't have anything on under it!"
Beast Boy's eyes lit up. "You take it back Star! She's got no right to steal stuff from you!" A line of drool had already escaped his mouth with the girls wrestled back and forth.
"Wardrobe! Where's the white bra?" The director moaned, holding his forehead. Out of nowhere
Robin walked on set with a white bra on. "I borrowed it earlier." Everyone froze and stared at him. "What? What?"
Rhyme ProblemThe dice landed on six. A 2 and a 4. The green game piece slid along its little path on the gameboard. It stopped smoothly after it had gone the appropriate distance. Taking a deep breath and letting it out, Beast Boy leaned forward to see what fate had in store for them. He felt Raven's hand on his back, and he glanced at her briefly. The smokey letters were taking shape in the black circle of glass…
UHM… I CAN'T THINK OF ANYTHING TO RHYME RIGHT NOW,
TRY AGAIN SOME OTHER TIME, OKAY?
All five of them fell down anime style, as well as everyone else on set.
Slade's Torture Chamber"No! Please Nooooooooo!" It was a female plea for mercy from Starfire. One that Raven had never heard in that particular tone. Her eyes widened. Slade wasn't –! Gathering herself Raven launched to her feet and ran onward, both boys behind her. Robin was pounding down the metallic stairs in twos and threes, reaching the concrete floor at last.
"Slade!" Robin roared his challenge, drawing his bow staff.
What a horrible scene it was to behold. Slade had Starfire tied to a table in the starfish position, and had her boots off. At the moment, he was tickling the bottom of her feet with a large feather. "Give in!" He said with malice. All four Titans sweat dropped as Starfire squealed with laughter.
Raven Checks To See If Starfire Was Abused"Look away. Both of you." Raven commanded as gently as she could. Cyborg and Beast Boy obliged, and she bit her lip. Praying silently, the gothic girl reached and carefully pulled up Starfire's skirt. Gently tugging at the under-fabric, she looked at the girl's panties. Raven blinked in confusion, seeing the most psychedelic pair of rainbow tie-dye panties she'd ever seen in her life. "Uh… what the hell…?" she mumbled, trying not to laugh and ruin the scene. But, she ended up snorting anyway.
"Cut!" The director went ahead and said. "Starfire those are supposed to be purple to match the outfit! What the hell are those?"
Starfire opened her eyes and sat up, giggling. "But they are nice! Robin gave them to me!" She exclaimed. Off set, Robin put up to hands to hold back everyone's accusing glares.
"No! I swear! I –!" A boot came from God knew where and smacked right into his forehead. "Hey… no fair…" He fell over unconscious.
Cyborg is Possessed!
"What does it say…?" he murmured, leaning forward to read. Since it was angled his way, he read it aloud to the others.
MADE WITH METAL, SCREW AND BOLT,
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THEY ALL REVOLT?
Everyone's brow furrowed. What the hell was that supposed to mean? The four of them looked at each other for an explanation, but could find none. "Roll the dice again, and get your turn over with." Raven commanded. The others nodded, and Cyborg was still intently looking at the game board. There was a short silence. "Cyborg, roll again." Raven said in a firmer tone, elbowing him rather harshly.
The metal man was frozen in place! Cyborg's body was trembling, as though with effort. "Cyborg?" Beast Boy put a hand on his shoulder. "Cy?"
Cyborg suddenly jumped up on his feet and started doing the robot (dance). "Hey!" he shouted, clearly not in control. "What the hell?" he started disco dancing at that point. "Make it stop! Make it stop!" he wailed. Everyone started laughing when he turned about like a ballerina. "Help! Heeeelp! Cut! Director! Somebody make it stop!" Comical tears were dripping form both eyes. He fell down on his butt and started street-wise break dancing. "Whoa-huh-hoaaa!" He didn't look anywhere near done, so everyone called for lunch. "Not cool ya'll! NOT COOL!"
It was fun to watch, but deep in the shadows… Robin had a super Cyborg controller, and was grinning evilly as he made his 'friend' dance. "Kill me off in the middle of the show, will you?" he sneered, hitting the little pink button. Cyborg stood erect and started doing the Can-Can! "Mwahahahaha!" Robin said diabolically, lightning flashing in the background.
Beast Boy Coaches Raven While She Fights MalchiorBeast Boy's arms wrapped around her middle, and he tore her hood back quickly so he could see her face and hair. Her buried his face in the crook of her neck, coaching her with one last cry. "Show him! Show us all! WE KNOW YOU'RE A LESBIAN!"
"What?" Raven cried, accidentally dropping the shield. The flames consumed them and were shut off quickly so no one would be hurt. Raven, who was as black as soot like in a cartoon, glared at Beast Boy. He was giggling helplessly, slowly backing away. "AAAARGH!" she took off after him and he ran for his life, screaming like a little girl.
"Uh… take five, everyone." Said the director, cocking an eyebrow. Beast Boy went by again, still screaming, dodging black lightning. "Mmm… better make it ten."
Raven Blows the Dice Up
"What is it, friend?" Starfire fearfully watched Raven pull Jumangi over to their sitting circle. She gulped a little loudly as Raven pulled the doors open and picked up the dice. Starfire shrieked as she rattled them around for a moment. "It is not your turn, friend Raven! What if the Dark Fall punishes you for rolling when it is not your –?" Raven blew the dice apart by magic.
Pieces flew everywhere and Robin roared in pain from being the camera! "AAARGH! Right in my fucking eye!" He staggered on set and crashed, knocking the camera over.
Raven Blows the Dice Up (Take 2)
"What is it, friend?" Starfire fearfully watched Raven pull Jumangi over to their sitting circle. She gulped a little loudly as Raven pulled the doors open and picked up the dice. Starfire shrieked as she rattled them around for a moment. "It is not your turn, friend Raven! What if the Dark Fall punishes you for rolling when it is not your –?" Raven blew the dice apart by magic.
Beast Boy sneezed while they were all qued to remain silent for a moment. "Oops…" he flushed when everyone looked at him. Cyborg pulled a handkerchief out of nowhere, handing it over. The green Teen blew his nose, and it sounded like a fog horn! Everyone behind camera started laughing, except the director of course.
Raven Blows the Dice Up (Take 3)
"What is it, friend?" Starfire fearfully watched Raven pull Jumangi over to their sitting circle. She gulped a little loudly as Raven pulled the doors open and picked up the dice. Starfire shrieked as she rattled them around for a moment. "It is not your turn, friend Raven! What if the Dark Fall punishes you for rolling when it is not your –?" Raven blew the dice apart by magic.
Nothing happened. There was a long silence. "Well… bleep." Raven was bleeped out by the censor bureau. The other three Titans laughed. "What? I can't say bleep while I'm here? Robin dropped an F-bomb a minute ago…" She was bleeped out again, and the laughter got louder. "Bleep bleep bleep bleepbleepbleep!" she was denied again, making obscene hand gestures and getting ready to blow the camera up.
"Hahaha… Raven can't say bleep! Ah! They did it to me!" Beast Boy looked horrified.
"Hmmm… bleep!" Cyborg was censored as well, trying the word out for himself. Raven was still stomping and swearing in the background, making it sound like a loud and annoying version of Morse code.
"Ah… bleep?" Starfire tried the word, and everything went quiet.
"Starfire said bleep!" Beast Boy was censored, but he was pointing at her and laughing. Wanna know what word it was? Too bad. (Audience falls down anime style)
Dark Fall Menaces the WorldAfter more time had passed it decided to play one more game with the group. One of them had lost, but the others had figured out the secret. Three games were more than enough. It was time to start feeding again. It already had thousands of souls, and had recently added one more. It was time to purge the world… right after lunch, anyway. Starfire had made those nice chicken wraps, and there was that donut table off set… oh, what about the tea it had promised Raven it would try… hmm… it was hungry. Surely the world could wait for a few minutes to be swallowed in darkness. Yeah… "Hey!" The director shouted. "Where the hell are you going? Hey, what're you–! Ahhh!" It sucked him into the void, and all that was left was his cheap baseball cap.
Beast Boy Tears His Shirt off During the Battle
All the tears in Beast Boy's shirt showed cuts and bruises here and there. The main ones were on his back. His suite was getting heavy since it was all wet now from the rain. "Oh… what the hell." Turning his hand into that of a tiger, he used a claw to cut his spandex around the waist. Taking a handful of the chest area of his shirt, he tore it away.
Starfire gasped in shock. "Friend Beast Boy…" she said softly, staring at him. She watched his 'shirt' flutter to the ground in the cold wind. He was muscular, but that's not what she was looking at. Beast Boy's torso was covered with "I 'heart' Starfire" Tattooes!
Raven suddenly ran on set out of nowhere and roundhouse kicked Beast Boy in the face! "Eat your heart out, Chuck Norris!" She declared, stalking angrily away. Then, she came right back and Roundhouse kicked Starfire in the face! The redhead fell with a girlish yelp of pain. Both of them lay there with their eyes in swirls and Raven just glared at them. Beast Boy started to sit up and she kicked him in the throat instead. He fell, gasping, while Raven's comical forehead vein throbbed angrily. "Horny little string bean…" she muttered, stomping off set.
No one dared say a word, but two of the show's actors were now unconscious. "Uhm… everybody take five again." The director sighed, shaking his head as he rolled his eyes. SUDDENLY RAVEN FLEW OUT OF NOWHERE AND ROUNDHOUSE KICKED THE DIRECTOR IN THE FACE! "Arrgh!" He fell out of his chair with a cry.
"Shut up!" Raven was clearly PMS-ing or something, and stalked away. No one dared stop her, for fear of being roundhouse kicked in the face.
Like My Arsenal?Raven rolled quickly as untangled herself and spread her cloak wide. Very Batman-ish, if she did say so herself. She almost felt like she was flashing them, but quickly squashed the thought. Her motion revealed what must've been a dozen different guns! "Like my arsenal? I saw the first Matrix movie yesterday." Raven said.
"Holy shit…" Beast Boy declared from off set, watching her draw the first two as the world fell into slow motion. Raven went full auto with thousands of bullets. Why thousands? Well, that's easy. Everybody knows that guns in the movies don't run out of ammo. EVER. "Duck and cover!"
"Is she bleep-ing crazy?" The director roared over the gunfire. "That's not in the script!"
Beast Boy started laughing, pointing at the director. "You just got censored out! Hahaha!"
"Bleep bleepbleepbleep! BLEEEP!" The director had Beast Boy by the collar, shaking him back and forth while he laughed.
Starfire VS. Robin"Robin please – Aaaeeeeigh!" she tumbled away at his vicious attacks, slamming into a dumpster. "I cannot fight you!" Bowstaff to the stomach. "Friend Robin –!" Hit across the jaw. "I cannot fight you!" Blood from her upper arm. "I…" He leaned forward and kissed her. "AAAIEEEEE!" She squealed, falling backwards and wiping her mouth a hundred times. "I have contracted the cooties!" she writhed back and forth. SUDDENLY RAVEN FLEW OUT OF NOWHERE AND ROUNDHOUSE KICKED ROBIN IN THE FACE! For no reason at all the director burst out laughing.
Raven Summons the Soul Hurricane"The… joke's on you, Dark… Fall…" Raven actually smiled a little as she sagged forward. "Soul… hurricane…" The swelling in Raven's heart subsided for a moment, and everything went still. Dark Fall paused in its enjoyment for a moment. A tiny, white glow surrounded the girl it had killed. What was going on? What was that glow? The Backstreet Boys suddenly burst from Raven's body, singing Bye Bye Bye! Was that even their song? Dark Fall squealed, holding its ears and then exploded into a million tiny little blobs of black ink! "Argh!" Raven cried. "Make it stop! Please mother of God make it stoooop!" She fell over unconscious, her ears bleeding.
Questionable Background MusicBeast Boy wasn't sure what to make of her when she emerged from the wreckage. Raven walked amongst the split streets, the glass and rock and wood. Signs pointed the wrong way and stuck out of the ground at odd angles. Her cloak was back around her, though it swayed in the brisk breeze to show off her tattered clothes. "Y…Y…" He couldn't even say it.
"What?" Raven said after the director had cut for a new angle of camera. "What's wrong? You almost missed your line there."
"You realize you just fought with a Yu-Gi-Oh song in the background, right?" Beast Boy said somewhat timidly. Raven looked shocked, horrified, then angry. She turned towards the director, her eyes flashing red.
"You DIDN'T. Shadow Games is a Yu-Gi-Oh song?" Raven demanded angrily.
"Yup. Isn't that cool?" The director smiled at her.
"NO IT'S NOT!" She jumped into the air, hovered matrix style for a moment… and roundhouse kicked him in the face.
"Oooh…" Beast Boy winced when the director hit a wall and made it crack. Though, it sounded like he was trying to cover up laughter with a sudden coughing fit. Raven glared at him and he shrank away.
Beast Boy Checks on Raven Right Before Her Shower
There was a knock at the door that made her jump. Flushing and hiding herself behind the door, she opened it just a crack so she could peer out. Beast Boy stood there, looking a little embarrassed and rather nervous. He could see her naked shoulder, but what he had to say couldn't wait. "Raven…" he whispered, just loud enough to hear over the water in the bathroom. "Are you… okay?" he looked up at her with an indescribable expression.
"Yeeek! Pervert!" Raven squealed. Out of nowhere she slammed a pair of panties onto his head, covering his eyes.
"Aaagh! Who turned out the lights?" Beast Boy staggered and ran into the wall, knocking himself out. The pink, lacey panties remained on his head for who knew how long before he woke up with a large bruise on his forehead.
How Robin Healed Raven On the Battlefield
When they were done laughing at his expense, Raven was the first to speak. "So out with it. How did you heal me out there on the battlefield?" Everyone had heard that part of the story, and everyone was curious.
"Will the Titan couldn't think of anything after he'd hurt you so badly, so he made some crap up." Robin shrugged. Suddenly Will the Titan bounded on stage and roundhouse kicked Robin in the face!
"Nice…" Raven actually smiled.
"No one botches my writing!" Will the Titan proclaimed, shaking a fist at the now unconscious boy wonder. "No one!" His voice echoed, and everyone stared at him. "Do you wanna be roundhouse kicked in the face too?" He demanded, glaring at them. Everyone jerked back, shaking their heads quickly. "Good." He stalked away, leaving a lot of raised eyebrows.
END OF BLOOPER REEL
Ahahahaha! That was really great! What was with all the roundhouse kicks the face? Well, my school has been swept with Chuck Norris jokes lately, mostly involving that attack, and I find those as funny as anything I could make up. Raven doing that sounded funny to me, but you either loved it or hated it. So, what did you think about this blooper reel? Sorry it took so long to come back and do it! PLEASE review this part and tell me what your favorite blooper was! I want to know what my readers thought the funniest one was. Didja like my guest appearance, by the way? Tee hee! Well, see ya later!