"Lookit how cute he is!" Hiei said as he stared at the gecko on the wall of the reptile house.
Botan looked at the gecko in disgust. She was not a fan of reptiles.
"Let's get out of here," Botan said, "reptiles are ugly."
Hiei paid no mind as he visited the next window in the exhibit. The window displayed a reticulated python.
"Ew," Botan retorted.
Hiei walked around the curved window to get a better look at the huge twenty-foot serpent. He gave Botan a huge smile. A HUGE smile.
Botan was feeling VERY uncomfortable at the moment. Hiei's smile was not merely ear-to-ear but reached outside the confines of his face.
In one nanosecond Hiei dashed out of sight. Botan twisted her head around to see where he had gone. "Hiei?" she said nervously.
She looked inside the display and her jaw dropped.
"Hiei! Get out of there!" Botan saw him in the display with the snake. Though Hiei was very pleased that he managed to get into the snake's "natural" habitat, the python couldn't care less. He looked at Hiei, blinked, and fell asleep again.
"Lookit the widdle python!" Hiei said as the last drop of sanity flew gleefully out of his ear.
"Get your butt back here right now!" Botan demanded.
Hiei grabbed hold of the snake's middle and started picking him up.
"You is a big python! Yes he is!" Hiei said childishly.
Suddenly Jonathan stuck her head out of the bathroom door and said, "He's not even grammatically correct now." She then went back inside and resumed her business.
Hiei was squeezing the python around the middle. The snake was still asleep.
Botan was quite nervous now. A member of the "dedicated" zoo staff can come and find them any minute. Hiei can be charged with harassment of a zoo animal.
"GET OUT OF THERE, THIS INSTINT!" Botan yelled so loudly that Jonathan had to hold onto the toilet paper holder to keep from crashing onto the bathroom floor.
Hiei amazed the students. Not because he was brave enough to hug a big snake, but because they managed to find someone lower on the maturity scale than they are.
"WHEEEE!" Hiei yelled with ferocious glee. "This is so much funnier than the time Botan used a Smirnoff bottle, some duct tape, red food dye, some weird powder, and some uranium isotope 289 to create the worlds most awesome fire cracker ever!"
"Ahhhh, memories," Jonathan said as she finally crashed, face first, onto the floor.
Hiei looked at the snake. "You're name is Mikey McSnuzzenbee from now on. Innit such a cute name?!"
"No it isn't," said a member of the zoo staff as he shot a traquilizer dart straight into Hiei's ass.
Hiei tried to wake up but, considering his circumstances, it was best not to.
In fact, he didn't know where he even was. He remembered a sharp pain in his behind before crashing to the zoo exhibit floor. Was he dead?
He tried moving his feet. Nothing. His legs were, for a lack of a better word, noodles.
He tried to scream out something like this: "HELP, I'M PARALYZED!"
But it came out something like this: "MUSKIBBUH FIBBITAH NIGGAH!"
"Who you callin' "niggah", freak?" said someone beside him.
He tried to say something like: "It was just misunderstanding, I swear!"
But it came out like: "BEEEAAATTTCCCHHH!"
"That's it, punk!" said the man as Hiei was punched repeatedly in the face.
"Okay Hiei. You're free to go," said the guard as he opened the prison door. But something looked strange. It looked as if the entire room was covered with soot. "What happened here?"
One of the prisoners tried to say something but he was stopped when his shin met Hiei's foot. Hiei had full motion yet again.
"Yes officer?" asked Hiei, unusually polite.
"Uh, you're being picked up." The officer looked around. The prisoners looked strangely blackened.
"By who?" asked Hiei.
"By Botan," said the officer.
Damn! This was Hiei's only thought on the matter.
Botan was waiting in her humble Honda Civic. Her anger could kill an elephant.
The door to the police station opened as Hiei happily pranced into the warm arms of freedom, only to trip and fall into the hellishly tight squeeze of Botan's wrath.
"Um, hi Botan," Hiei said, cautiously as to not make her head explode in fury (who would clean up that mess?).
"Get in Hiei," said Botan. "We need to talk."
Author's notes: Why do I take so long? T.T Schoolwork get's in the way of EVERYTHING. Ugh. CSG