Author's Note: I don't own Final Fantasy.
A Day in the Life of Zack
At this particular moment in time, Zack's corpse had begun to rot a little. Fangirls avidly attempted to write fanfiction depicting him as alive, well, and clearly homosexual. Often with Cloud and/or Sephiroth.
Alas, in this particular story, the only action Zack received was a good skull fucking by a vulture's beak as it tore out one of his eyes.
The end.