Tears
Rating:
Pg-13 angst
Summery: A glimpse of Jack past.
Disclaimer: I
don't own this boy if I did…. Only if I did…..
My
dad always told me tears were for girl. That was nothing special.
Every boy hears it once before he's grown. I never believed a word
my dad told me. Not after I saw him beat my mom to death. They put
him away for that, sent me to live with strangers. I keep seeing it
in my head, my dad standing over my mom, broken bottle in hand. The
doctors said she could have lived if he had called 911 a few minutes
earlier. I think he knew that. I think he knew a lot of things he
never told me. Truths he never shared.
The nightmare started my
second week in the first of 12 foster homes. They got worse each
night. In my second foster home the lady took me to a head doctor.
They told me I suffered from a very vivid imagination and suffered
from nightmares. He never bothered to ask any of the important
questions.
I was 11 when Evelyn took me in. The first night I
woke up screaming she held me, told me it was okay to cry. So I did.
I cried till there was nothing left in me to let out. She gave me
milk and put me to bed. I fell asleep and for the first time in three
years I had no dreams.
Over the next 11 year I wasn't given many
reasons to cry. Flying home for Ma's funeral was the hardest thing
I had to do. Harder than prying the phone from my dad's hand to
call 911. Harder than closing my eyes and breathing in that scent,
his scent, harder than making myself not move fight push shove
against him… it …whatever. Standing over Ma grave broke my heart
the way nothing else ever did.