Authors Note: All characters are owned by the WWF/WWE, I don't own them at all
THE STORM IS OVER
The thunder rolls by. Rain beats on the window and lightning flashes. My heart starts to beat louder as the storm gets closer. I pull my blanket tighter around my shoulders. I've always been petrified of storms. When I was younger they always scared me. As I got older my fear of them started to disappear. But then the accident happened. It was a stormy night like this when it happened. Suddenly I felt a warm arm around my shoulders. It's only then that I remember I'm not alone. I look up into my husbands worried face. He asks me what I'm thinking about. I tell him it's just old memories. He sits down next to me and pulls me into his arms. We both sit there and remember how our lives changed forever.
I flew out to the states when I turned twenty one. My life long dream had always been to work for the WWF. I loved making documentaries and short films and I had graduated college top of my class. About three months ago I had designed a documentary on my favorite wrestlers. I sent off the plan to the media department at Titan Towers. I didn't think much else about it and started to get ready for my new job at Yorkshire Television. It wasn't my dream job but it gave me the experience that I needed to move up in the world of entertainment.
I had been working for YTV for just under a month when I received a letter from Titan Towers. I opened it eagerly and couldn't believe my eyes when I read the letter. It said that they had received my production plan and they were very intrigued. They thought my ideas were fresh and I would make an excellent addition to their family. They said they would call me in two days time at 8pm our time.
I must have read that letter thirty more times that day. I showed it to my parents and they couldn't believe it. They asked me what I'd do if they offered me a job. I told them that I wouldn't have to think about taking it because this was what I wanted to do. My parents told me not to rush things and think about whether I wanted to settle for this sort of job or do something more popular. My parents had never understood the attraction that wrestling had for me. To them it was just a bunch of pumped up men and women throwing each other around the ring. To me it was an art form, I could watch matches all day and night and not get bored. The skills amazed me and I knew that this was what I wanted to do.
I was called, as promised, a couple of days later by the head of New media department. They told me that they had loved my idea and would like to invite me over to Titan Towers for a proper meeting. I told them that I'd love to but I couldn't afford the air flight and cost of a hotel room. They told me not to worry because they would sort everything out for me so all I had to do was turn up at Manchester airport as soon as possible. I told them that I could fly out in a week if they wanted. We arranged everything and I was flying out from Manchester in seven days time, early in the afternoon.
At YTV I talked to my boss about getting some time off. They didn't want me to at first but I told them that I was still only a rookie doing odd jobs around the office. Eventually they agreed to give me a week off. I didn't tell them about the interview, just that I needed to visit family in the states. It wasn't a complete lie because if the interview went well, then hopefully I'd be part of the WWF family.
After work I went shopping to buy a new outfit for my interview before driving back home.
The day before I flew out I went shopping for a few things. I brought loads of batteries and a few films, just in case I had the chance to go sightseeing. I brought a few magazines and books for the journey, and a few more outfits.
The next morning I was up at six. My flight was at twelve noon so I was planning on leaving at eight so I would get there in enough time. I hugged my parents and asked them to wish me luck. They just told me to think before I said yes. I told them that I'd call when I arrived at Manchester and then when I landed in Connecticut.
I started up my car and pushed my tape in. I waved goodbye and set off for the airport. I had a new CD player in my car with a multi changer. I had put in Pearl Jam and Creed in the changer so I could listen to them on the way.
I got to the airport at about 10:30. I booked in and went to wait for my flight to be called. I was sat having a coffee when a couple of airport staff approached me. They asked me if I could follow them. I grabbed my bag and walked after them. They took me into a room and asked to see my ticket. I handed it to them and asked them what was wrong. They said nothing was wrong there had just been a change to my flight plans. I wouldn't be using this ticket anymore. They asked me to follow them through to a private lounge. I walked in and was introduced to Shane McMahon. He shook my hand and said that there had been a change of plan with my travel arrangements. I would now be travelling on the official Jet with him. Shane asked me if I minded. I told him I didn't mind anything. Shane took my bag and handed it to a flight attendant, who had the WWF log on her uniform. Shane told me that his dad had sent him to the UK to do some business and hey had decided that since we would both be leaving on the same day then we should travel together. We walked out to where the Jet was waiting for us. It had a huge WWF logo on the tail. Shane told me that his dad had decided that he wanted his own jet so he bought this one. During the journey Shane told me a bit more about the company and asked me about myself and my short films and documentaries. He told me that he had read my plan and he really loved it and hopefully it would become a reality sooner rather than later.
The journey was very tiring and when we landed I thanked Shane for the ride. He told me we weren't done yet because he still had to take me to my hotel. We both wearily climbed into a limo. Shane asked the driver to take us to my hotel. When we got there Shane said everything had been sorted and all I needed to do was collect my key. I thanked Shane again and told him hopefully I'd see him before I went home. Shane told me that he'd be in the meeting and handed me a large envelope and told me to read the things inside and he'd see me in a couple of days.
When I got to my hotel room, I couldn't believe how big it was. I dropped my bags near the bed and quickly rang my parents. I told them that I had landed and I was gonna crash for a couple of hours and I'd call them later.
I climbed onto my bed and crashed out. When I woke up it was early evening. I had a long hot shower before ordering room service. I was about halfway through my meal when the phone rang. I picked it up and was shocked to hear Shane's voice. He asked me if I had any plans for the evening, because his dad would love for me to attend the Raw is War taping in the next town. I told Shane that I'd love to and asked him how I should get there. Shane told me not to worry, all I needed to do was get ready and meet him down in the lobby in half an hour.
I quickly finished my meal before getting ready. I threw on a pair of dark jeans, a black top and my leather jacket. I casually walked down to the lobby even though I was jumping inside. Shane asked me if I was ready. I told him I couldn't wait. We climbed into a black sports car and set off for the arena. Shane told me that he liked to drive his own car to the arenas when they were near his home. We got to the arena about an hour before the show started. Shane took me to meet a couple of people. He was introducing me to Jeff Hardy when he got called away to discuss something. I was stood talking to Jeff for a while. He asked me if I was a friend of Shane's/. I told him that I had flown in for an interview about working for the company. Jeff asked me if I was wrestling. I told him that I was a documentary maker. Shane had received one of my plans and the company really liked it so they had flown me out for a meeting. Jeff was really interested and asked me what my documentary was about. I got a bit shy and told him that it was about my favorite wrestlers. Jeff asked me, I told him that it was him and his brother. Jeff was flattered and said he had heard something about a documentary plan that Shane had received. Jeff asked me if I wanted to get something to eat whilst we waited for the show. We both walked to the snack room and sat down. Before we could start talking Shane came back and apologized but said Vince would like to meet me. I told Jeff that it had been fun talking to him and wished him luck for his match.
I met Vince in his makeshift office. He shook my hand and asked how my journey had been. I told him it was fine and thanked him for going to all the trouble he did. Vince told me that from what he had read I was worth the little extra trouble. I thanked him again. We talked quickly about the business and Vince told me that he looked forward to really talking to me in the morning at Titan Towers. I shook his hand again and said I couldn't wait until the morning.
Shane escorted me to the gorilla pit and asked one of the backstage guys to escort me to my seat. I had a reserved seat at ringside right next to the ramp. The gentleman who escorted me to my seat told me that if I needed anything at all then to just ask one of the security guys. Consequently he would come back and get me as soon as the main event was over
The show was brilliant. Jeff and Matt were up against Edge and Christian. Whilst Jeff was running down the ramp he spotted me and came over and shook my hand. I wished him luck again before he jumped into the ring. During the match Jeff kept looking over at me and smiling. I couldn't help smiling back. I ended up with some brilliant pictures of Jeff smiling at me.
After the show I was escorted backstage where Shane was waiting for me. He asked me if I'd enjoyed the show. I told him it was great and thanked him for bringing me. Shane told me that he wouldn't be able to give me a lift back to the hotel for about an hour because he had a few things to sort out. I told him that I didn't mind waiting. I sat in the backstage area with a drink. Suddenly an idea came to my head. I grabbed my notebook out of my bag and opened it up to a clean page. I had a great idea for a new project. I started writing notes and I was very quickly engrossed in my project. I didn't notice anyone else until I heard someone clear there throat. I looked up and was shocked to see Jeff still there. He asked me if I'd enjoyed the show. I told him it was great and I really enjoyed it. Jeff sat down on the crate next to me and asked me what I was writing. I told him that I had had an idea of a documentary and I was just writing it down so I wouldn't forget. My notebook was full of different ideas and I never left home without it. Jeff asked me if he could wait with me. I asked him how he was gonna get back home. Jeff told me not to worry about it because he could always call a taxi, if his brother had left. We sat talking for about ten minutes before Matt came up. He asked Jeff if he wanted a lift back to the hotel with him and Amy. Jeff told his brother to go ahead because he was gonna wait with me. Matt told him that he'd see him back at the hotel. We carried on talking until Shane came back. He said hi to Jeff and asked him if Matt had left yet. Jeff told him that he had left with Amy about half an hour ago. Shane told Jeff to grab his bag and he'd give him a ride back to the hotel with me, since we were staying in the same hotel. Jeff thanked him and grabbed his bag. We all walked out to where Shane's car was parked. Jeff climbed into the back whilst Shane and I got in the front. Shane dropped us off outside the hotel and told me that there would be a car to pick me up at 10 in the morning. I thanked him again and told him that I'd see him in the morning. Jeff asked me if I wanted to get a drink. I told him that I'd love to but it could only be a quick one so I was feeling alright for the interview. We sat in a quiet corner of the bar with a drink. Jeff asked me if I was nervous about my interview. I told him I was a bit but I knew that I could do the work so that helped. We finished our drinks and Jeff wished me luck again. He walked me up to my hotel room and said he had had fun tonight. Before we said goodnight he asked me if I'd have lunch with him the next day. I told him that I'd love to and I'd see him later. Jeff gently kissed me before saying goodnight.
The next morning I was up bright and early I ordered room service and had a shower whilst I was waiting. I ate my breakfast and finished getting ready. I collected all of my pares together and went down to the lobby to wait for my ride. A black limo pulled up and the driver got out. He asked if I was waiting for a ride to Titan Towers. I told him I was. The driver opened the door and ushered me in.
When we got to Titan Towers I walked through to the reception. A security guard was behind the desk. I told him my name and who I was there to see. He checked my name and handed me a visitors pass. He told me where the lift was and which floor I needed. I rode all the way to the top floor where I found another reception. I told them who I was and who I was here to see. They asked me to take a seat whilst they announced me. I was sat there only ten minutes when Shane came out. He asked me how I was feeling today. I told him I was fine just a little bit nervous. Shane told me not to worry because I'd do fine. He walked me through to his dad's office and asked me to take a seat. Vince walked in a minute later and shook my hand. He asked me how I was and how my journey had been. I told him that everything was great. I showed Vince a few of my other ideas to show him what I could do. Vince was amazed at my ideas and told me that my ideas were fresh and that was something that they wanted. Vince asked me if I'd be willing to do videos and promos for WCW as well, since he had not long ago purchased it. I told him that if I could sit and watch a few of their videos and shows then I could more than likely make some new ideas for him. Vince told me that he wouldn't normally do this, but from my first piece of work he could tell that I had something special. He asked me if I would be willing to work for them. I was about to say yes when Vince continued. He told me that he would give me an advance so I could get somewhere to live in Greenwich and so that I could sort everything out. I told Vince that it had always been my dream to work for him so my answer was yes. Vince shook my hand and welcomed me to the family. He said that he would leave me in Shane's hands to sort everything out. We walked through to Shane's office and sat down. Shane told me that I should really enjoy working for them. We sorted everything out and Shane asked me if I wanted to tell anyone about my job. I told him that I'd tell them when I got home. Shane asked me if, since I wasn't flying home until the weekend, I would like to go house hunting with him. I told him that I'd love to but I had promised I would have lunch with Jeff. Shane told me not to worry because we could always go tomorrow. I told Shane that if he knew how to contact Jeff then maybe he could come house hunting with us as well. Shane found Jeff's number and let the office whilst I rang him up. Jeff answered on the second ring. I asked him what he was doing this afternoon before our meal. Jeff said that he had just finished working out at the gym and he didn't have anymore plans because it was his day off. I asked Jeff if he wanted to come house hunting with me and Shane. Jeff was quiet for a minute and then asked me if this meant I had been offered the job. I told him that not only had I been offered the job but I had accepted as well. Jeff told me that he'd meet us outside the hotel in half an hour. Shane came back in and asked me what Jeff had said. I told him that Jeff would meet us outside the hotel in half an hour. Shane told me that he had sorted everything out so we could go. We walked outside and Shane told me that since it was a nice day he had drove his black convertible Jeep to the office. We walked over to where it was parked next to his dads. We both climbed in and set off for the hotel. Jeff was stood outside waiting for us. He was in a pair of shorts, a T-shirt and a baseball cap so people wouldn't recognize him. He jumped into the back and we set off. Jeff had a paper full of properties and we pulled over the car to look at them. We circled the ones that were nice and close to Titan Towers. Shane read the address and we set off for the closest one.
We ended up looking around twenty houses that day. I fell in love with a small two bedroom house. It had it's own pool in the back and a room where I could put a gym. Shane told me to think about it and if I decided that I wanted this one then we could put a deposit on it first thing in the morning. Shane dropped me and Jeff off at the hotel and said he'd see us in the morning. I asked Jeff to give me half an hour to get ready before we went for something to eat. I had a quick shower and got changed. Jeff knocked on my door and asked me if I was ready. I took hold of his outstretched arm and told him I was always ready. We climbed into the elevator and went down to the restaurant. The meal was gorgeous and we must have spent three hours sat eating and talking. By the time we had finished we were the only people in the restaurant. Jeff asked me if I'd like to get some coffee with him. I told him I'd love to but the restaurant looked like it wanted to close. Jeff said we could always order room service. I thought for a moment and told him I'd love to. We ordered our coffee and went up to his room.
It was two am when I finally looked at my watch. I told Jeff that it was getting late, or early as the case may be. Jeff told me he was sorry for keeping me up and asked me if I was tired. I told him I was fine I was just wondering if he had an early morning. Jeff told me that they were travelling out for the next show in the afternoon but that was all. Jeff asked me when I was flying back home. I told him that I was only here until the weekend but I'' be flying back as soon as possible. He smiled when I said I was coming back soon. He asked me if I would go out with him again when I came back. I told him that I'' love to. I smiled and Jeff asked me what was funny. I told him it wasn't anything funny I was just happy to have my first friend in the states. Jeff moved closer to me and said that he knew we had only just met each other but he'd like to maybe become more than friends. I was shocked, we had only just met each other. Jeff told me that he didn't want to rush me, we could take our time and see how we felt. I told Jeff that I'd love to be more than friends in time but right now I could only be friends. I explained that I liked him but I had only just split up with my boyfriend before I flew out and I didn't feel ready to start anything new. Jeff told me he knew how I felt he had not long since broken up with someone he thought he loved. We talked for about an hour longer before I started to feel really tired. I told Jeff that hopefully I'd see him before I left. Jeff walked me to the door and gently kissed me. He told me it was so I didn't forget him until I came back.
I visited Titan Towers a few more times before I left. Shane put the deposit down on the house for me and told me that everything would be sorted for when I returned. He even told me that they would sort me out with a company car until I got my own. I thanked Vince and Shane for everything and promised that it would be a month at most before I was back. Shane gave me his personal number and told me to call him when I knew a definite date that I could fly out. I promised I would before setting off for the airport. Jeff had called me every night since he had left. I promised to call him as soon as I got back. Jeff told me that he'd call me before then.
I was sat in a private lounge waiting for my flight. Suddenly I saw a single red rose in front of me. I looked up to see Jeff. He handed e the rose and told me that since he had the weekend off, he thought he'd come and say goodbye. I told him he didn't need to come all the way back. Jeff smiled and told me that he wanted me to remember him whilst I was back home, so I didn't find anyone else. Before we could say anything else my flight was called. Jeff walked me to the gates and told me to have a fun flight. We hugged tightly and I promised to talk to him soon. I was just walking away when he grabbed hold of my arm and pulled me back. He told me that he wanted to make sure I didn't forget him before he leant in and kissed me. I held the back of his head as we continued to kiss. When we finally broke apart I told him that I definitely wouldn't forget that.
During my whole flight home I kept thinking about the kiss. I sat there listening to my CD's and reading a magazine but all I could think about were his soft lips on mine.
Once we had landed I got my bag and everything and went to the café. I bought a coffee to drink before I drove home. I jumped into my car, turned on the CD player and started the two and a half hour drive home.
When I got there I said hi to everyone before going for a shower and unpacking. I fell asleep really early and slept until my mobile rang, waking me up. I grabbed hold of my phone and pressed answer. I was half asleep until I heard Jeff's apologetic voice. He apologized for waking me up. I told him that since it was him he didn't need to worry. Jeff asked me how my flight was, I told him it was tiring and I could barely keep my eyes open. Jeff apologized again and told me that he had only called to say he was missing me and to make sure I had gotten home safe. I told him that I missed him as well and I'd see him in a month when I flew back, for good. Jeff told me have a sweet sleep and he'd see me soon. I hung up the phone and fell back to sleep with a smile on my face.
When I got up the next afternoon I went down to see everyone. I told them all about my job offer and how I'd accepted it. My parents were a bit disappointed but eventually told me if it was what I wanted to do then it would always give me a bit more experience. I had given up trying to make them understand that this was more than experience. I had a really good tan from being in the hot sun for a week and I felt brilliant.
I went into work and told them that I was leaving. They told me that since I hadn't been with the company for long then I would only need a week's notice. I handed my notice in on the Tuesday. I called Shane that evening and told him that I'd be all set to fly out in two weeks. Shane told me that everything would be sorted and he'd send me my travel arrangements in a couple of days by recorded mail.
Jeff called me at the end of the week and asked me if it was true that I'd be back in a fortnight. I told him I would but I was gonna be based in Greenwich at Titan Towers when I wasn't filming a video. Jeff was a bit disappointed at first but then he told me that it didn't matter because I would be on the road when I was doing a video and he could always come and see me each week when he had a few days off. I asked Jeff if he was sure we could work it out. Jeff told me that if we wanted it to then it would. I told Jeff I'd see him in a couple of weeks and we could arrange everything then. Jeff told me he was still missing me and he'd see me soon.
On my last day at work, my boss wished me luck and said they'd keep an eye out for me. I said goodbye to everyone before driving home for the last time. I spent the rest of the week saying goodbye to my friends and family. I was just about to meet a friend for a drink when my ex showed up. He told me that we needed to talk. We both got in the car and drove for some privacy. Dave asked me if it was true that I was leaving at the weekend. I told him that I had been offered a job in the states and it was true. Dave asked me if I'' stay if he told me that he loved me. I stopped the car and told Dave that we had broken up a month ago because he cheated on me, he couldn't say or do anything that would make me change my mind. Dave pulled me closer and started to kiss me. I pushed him away and told him to get out of my car. I drove off without him and went to meet my friend at the pub. I only had one drink that night because I was driving.
I was getting worried because I flew out in two days and my travel arrangements still hadn't arrived. I called Shane that night and asked him if he had sent them. Shane told me not to worry because my details would get to meet for Saturday morning at the latest, maybe a day earlier. I thanked Shane and told him I'd see him in a couple of days.
I finished packing all my things up Thursday afternoon. Once I was done packing I went shopping for a few bits and pieces. On my way home I stopped at a Chinese for something to eat for everyone.
When I got up Friday morning there was no one else in. I jumped into the shower to wake myself up before getting dressed. I was just about to have my breakfast when the doorbell rang. I opened it expecting the postman. I was extremely shocked and happy to see Jeff stood there. He asked me if I was surprised to see him. I hugged him tightly and asked him what he was doing there. Jeff smiled and told me that he was my travel arrangements. Shane had convinced Vince to give him the weekend off to fly out in the company jet to pick me up because they knew how much stuff I'd have. The only downside was that we'd have to leave this evening. I told Jeff that if it meant I could fly out with him then I'd leave this morning. We both sat down in the dining room whilst I finished my breakfast. My mother got back at about 11am. She asked me if I could help her put the horse out. I told her that I'd love to once I'd introduced her to someone. Jeff walked into the kitchen and shook her hand. My mum was shocked to see him there. I explained that Jeff had flown out to help me with my things during the journey. I handed Jeff a pair of old boots to wear up to the farm. We all climbed into my mums land rover and set off for the farm. Jeff and my mum talked the entire journey there. They even kept on talking whilst I walked the horse halfway down the field. When we got back to mine we dropped our boots in the garage. I told my mum that if she was finished interrogating Jeff we were gonna go out for a while and we'd see her in a couple of hours. I took Jeff to the local shopping center. We went round the shops and got something to eat before going to get my things. I said goodbye to my whole family once all of my stuff was loaded into the car. I left my spare set of keys with them so they could pick the car up at the airport in the morning. We were flying out from Manchester again but this time at 10pm.
Jeff turned on the stereo and we listened to Pearl Jam and Creed.
When we got to the airport Jeff grabbed a couple of trolleys to load my things onto. We booked in and went through to the private lounge until the jet was ready to leave. We didn't have to wait long. It only took half an hour for them to load it up and finish filling it up with gas. Jeff took my hand and we walked out to the jet. We both got buckled in and waited for the plane to start.
The journey was more fun this time. We spent all of it talking through anything and everything. Jeff told me that if I still wanted to take it slow then we could. I told Jeff that this past two weeks without him had made me realize that I didn't want to waist any more time. Jeff took hold of my hand and said he didn't want to be friends either. He leaned over and kissed me softly.
When we landed there was a car waiting for us. We loaded all of my things up and set off for my new home. I asked Jeff if he wanted to crash in the spare room for the night. We put all of the boxes and bags in the main room and both fell asleep before our heads hit the pillow. The next morning I woke up to the smell of pancakes and coffee. When I walked into the kitchen Jeff smiled and said he wished he could take the credit for breakfast but he had run out and got it about ten minutes ago. I told him it didn't matter because it was food and I was starving.
We ate our breakfast before starting to unpack the boxes. We had almost everything set up by that evening. Jeff was just about to call a take-out when there was a knock on the door. I opened it to find Shane and his wife stood there with two bags full of take-out. Shane told me that he had thought we might be hungry so Marissa, his wife, had suggested a take-out. I invited them in and told them to take a seat. We set out all of the take-away whilst Jeff grabbed some plates. Shane had even brought some wine with him. I found the glasses in one of the boxes we hadn't unpacked and grabbed four of them. We talked about everything that night. Whilst Jeff and Shane were out getting ice-cream for us I sat talking to Marissa. She told me that Shane and Vince were very excited about having me part of the team and she couldn't wait to see some of my work. When Shane and Jeff came back with the ice-cream Shane asked me if I'd be ready for work on Monday. I told him that I had all of my work with me so I was more than ready for Monday. Shane told me that he would send my company car over first thing in the morning for me. I thanked him before Marissa changed the subject.
Shane and Marissa left an hour later. Whilst Jeff helped me to do the washing up he told me that he had to leave in the afternoon to fly out for the show. I put my towel down and said we'd have to have some fun before he left. Jeff took me in his arms and kissed me softly. He smiled when we broke apart and said he wanted to have fun as well but we hadn't known each other that long and he wanted to wait. I kissed him and told him I'd wait as well. We continued to kiss in the kitchen for a while longer. We both walked up to our rooms. Before Jeff went into his I took his hand and told him that since this was his last night for a while I wanted to feel his warm arms around me. Before he could say anything I told him that I just wanted to fall asleep in his arms. Jeff pulled his door closed and followed me.
I woke up in Jeff's strong arms. He was sound asleep and looked really peaceful. I reached up and gently kissed him. Sleepily he opened his eyes and looked down at me smiling. I reached up and moved a strand of hair out of his face and asked him if he'd slept well. He leant down and kissed me and told me it was heavenly. We laid in bed for as long as we could until Jeff had to eventually get up to pack for his flight. Whilst Jeff was in the shower I made us some brunch. We were just about to sit down to it when my car was delivered. It was a gorgeous black convertible Jeep, a lot like one of Shane's. I signed for it and asked Jeff if he wanted to take it for a spin before I took him to the airport. We quickly finished our food before throwing Jeff's bags into the boot and going for a drive. We drove around a little way before heading for the airport. I parked the car and helped Jeff load his two bags onto a trolley. Jeff booked in and we went to the departure lounge to wait. The flight was delayed by ten minutes so we got a little bit extra time together. When his flight was called I tightly held his hand. Jeff promised to ring as soon as he got to his hotel. I pulled him closer and kissed him and told him that I'd miss him. Jeff wouldn't let me go he told me that he couldn't wait to see me again and he couldn't wait until I was on the road with him for the video. We kissed once more before he had to board. I watched through the window as his flight left. Slowly I walked back to my jeep. It was weird, we hadn't known each other much over a month but I already tell that I was falling in love. I jumped into my jeep and cranked up the sound system whilst I drove back home. As soon as I got there I started to sort out the things I would need for work.
My first day at work was very eventful. Shane met me in reception and got me my ID tag and showed me where my office would be. He told me everything was in my office including a laptop, so I could take my work home with me. I thanked him for everything and sat down to go through my work. There was a note from Vince on my desk asking me if I could make a formal presentation of my 'Team Xtreme' video at a meeting on Friday. I asked Shane if I would have any help on this presentation. He told me not to worry because I had five people on my team who would all help me and show me around. I was scheduled to meet them after lunch so we could discuss the planning for the video. I spent all morning typing up bits and pieces and scouring the databases for more information on Matt, Jeff and Amy.
By lunch I had quite a file developed. I printed it all out and left it with my receptionist to make five more copies for after lunch. I went into the lunch room to get a drink and a sandwich. It was only a small room for the people on this floor. I quickly ate my sandwich and went back to my office. I found six copies of my 'Team Xtreme' file on my desk all presented in booklets. I thanked my receptionist and logged back onto my computer. I was just about to look at the video library database for the historical Hardy Boyz and Lita matches. Before I could really start looking my office phone rang. I answered it, expecting to hear Shane's voice. I was completely shocked when Jeff said hi. He asked me how my first day was going. I told him everything was fine and I was gonna be watching him on Raw tonight. I could hear Jeff smile down the phone. He told me he missed me and he hoped he could come and see me this weekend. I told him I missed him as well but I'd see him soon. Before he went he told me to listen to a certain radio show at 6pm. When I asked him why he told me it was a surprise. I promised I'd listen an I'd call him after the show.
That afternoon I was a bit nervous before I went into the meeting. I took a deep breath and knew I could do this. I introduced myself to them all and handed them a copy of the booklet. I explained what the video was going to be about and everything that we needed to do. Everyone was delegated a role to get a presentation together for Friday. We spent three hours in the meeting room going over everything. Eventually it was time to call it quits for the day.
It was five to six by the time I got in my jeep. I turned the radio on and listened until six. Suddenly I heard Jeff's voice over the radio. "Tara, my life has lots of ups and downs in it. Before I found you it was like a permanent black cloud over me and now with you the storm is over. I think I've fallen madly in love with you and I miss you. I'll be back soon but until then this song is what reminds me of you and what you do.'
I was in shock at first and I could feel the tears come to my eyes. Suddenly I heard the opening chords of one of my favorite songs.
I was in a tunnelAnd couldn't see the light
And whenever I'd look up
I couldn't see the sky
Sometimes when I'm standin'
It seems like I done walked for miles
And my heart must be cryin'
Dead in the middle of a smile.
But then I climbed the hills
And saw the mountains
I hollered help 'cause
I was lost
Then I felt the strong wind
Heard a small voice sayin'
The storm is over
The storm is over now
And I can see the sunshine
Somewhere beyond the clouds
I can feel heaven yeah
Heaven is over me
Come and set me free.
Now in the midst of my battle
All hope was gone
Downtown in a rushed crowd
And felt all alone
And every now and then
I felt like I would lose my mind
I've been racin' for years
And still no finish line.
But then I climbed the hills
And saw the mountains
I hollered help 'cause
I was lost
Then I felt the strong wind
Heard a small voice sayin'
The storm is over
The storm is over now
And I can see the sunshine
Somewhere beyond the clouds
I can feel heaven yeah
Heaven is over me
Come and set me free.
Somehow my beginning
Stepped right in
Then faith became my friend
And now I can depend
On the voices of the wind
When it's sayin'
Sayin'
The storm is over
The storm is over now
And I can see the sunshine
Somewhere beyond the clouds
I can feel heaven yeah
Heaven is over me
Won't you come and set me from
Won't you set me free.
The storm is over
The storm is over now
And I can see the sunshine
Somewhere beyond the clouds
I can feel heaven yeah
Heaven is over me
Won't you come and set me free
Won't you come and set me free
Hey looks like
Looks like I can see the light shinin'
Somewhere beyond the clouds
Look like I can see the light shinin' down
Down on me.
I pulled into my driveway as the song was finishing. I was in shock. Jeff had told me that he was falling in love with me over the airwaves. I knew that I had to repay him somehow. I sat and watched Raw tonight and never took my eyes off Jeff when he wrestled.
About an hour after the show had finished I called Jeff's cell phone. He asked me if I'd liked the song. I told him that I loved it and I couldn't wait until he came to visit me because hopefully I'd have some good news for him. Jeff tried for the remainder of the phone-call to get me to tell him but I wouldn't. Jeff told me that he wished he was with me so I could rub his shoulders because they were sore after his match. I promised him that if he waited then I'd rub his shoulders for him when he came to visit me. Jeff told me that he'd see me soon before we both hung up. I did a bit more work on my laptop before shutting it down and going to sleep.
For the rest of the week I worked with my team at getting the presentation completed. It was all done and dusted by 11am Friday morning.
My meeting with Vince and Shane was at 2pm. I collected all of my things together and went to wait in the meeting room. Vince and Shane walked in and told me not to worry. I handed them both a booklet outlining the entire project. My presentation lasted fifteen minutes and by the end Shane was nodding convincingly. Vince told me that he knew it was my first presentation but he thought I did brilliantly. He told me to tell my team that we had the go ahead for our video and we could start it as soon as possible. I thanked them both and promised to send the timetable to them as soon as it was ready.
I stayed at work late that night to sort a few things out. I had finished the schedule and had faxed a copy to Vince and Shane. Before I left I made a printout of all the matches Matt and Jeff had been in.
When I got back home Jeff was sat on my doorstep. I jumped out of the car and ran into his arms. I kissed him and told him that I had missed him so much. Jeff picked me up and carried me into the house. He let me drop my bag and laptop in the living room before carrying me through to the kitchen and sitting me on the worktop. He kissed me passionately and told me that at the beginning of the week he thought he was falling in love with me but now he had seen me again he knew that he wasn't falling in love. I was about to say something when he silenced me with a kiss. He told me that he wasn't falling in love anymore he had already fallen to hard. I kissed him and told him that I didn't think I'd ever fall in love with anyone, but now I had him and I didn't want to fall in love with anyone else. I told Jeff to carry me to my room so we could be more comfortable. Jeff picked me up and hurriedly carried me upstairs. We both fell onto the bed and started to kiss.
That night was one of the most gentle, loving nights of my life. When I woke up in the morning I felt happy and contempt. I looked up into Jeff's shining face. He leant down and kissed me and told me that he loved me even more this morning than he had last night. We spent most of the morning in each others arms. I told Jeff that we couldn't stay in bed all day because I had things to do. Jeff held me tighter and asked me if I really had to get up. I told him that I wished I didn't but I needed a shower. Jeff looked at me sadly and asked me to stay in bed with him. I told him I was sorry but that if he was good he could come and help me this afternoon. Jeff slowly climbed out of bed with me. I walked into the bathroom and turned the shower on. Whilst it was heating up I turned on my stereo to listen to some music. Jeff pulled me closer to him again and kissed me. I told him that I needed to take a shower and so did he. Jeff grinned at me and picked me up. Before I could protest he carried me into the bathroom and closed the door.
When we both climbed out of the shower an hour later I told Jeff that we really needed to go. We both got dressed and climbed into my jeep. Jeff asked where we were going. I told him I just had a bit of work to do at the office and then I'd tell him the good news. We pulled into a parking space and went inside. I said hi to security and showed them my pass. We climbed into the elevator and went up to my office. I grabbed what I need from my office and headed down to the video library. I selected a few of the tapes that I needed to look at. We went into one of the rooms and I put one of the videos in. Jeff was shocked when his first ever Match appeared on the screen. I told Jeff that Vince had given us the green light on the video, so I'd be filming him on the road in one months time. Jeff hugged me tightly and asked me how long I'd be travelling with them. I smiled and said I'd allocated a month's time for the interviews. Jeff puled me onto his lap and kissed me. Before we could get too carried away I told Jeff to wait until we got home. I ejected the video and put it in the case. I reserved all of the Hardy Boys videos for the next week so I could choose the footage I required
Jeff flew back out Sunday afternoon again. Until then we didn't leave the house once.
Monday evening I told Jeff to listen to the radio station he asked me to listen to. At six pm there would be a reply to last week.
I was working really late. I leaned over and turned on my radio quietly. My phone rang at five to six. It was the radio station asking if I was ready to make my dedication.
Suddenly it was my turn to dedicate a song. "Jeff, last week you told me that when I came into your life I made the black clouds leave. Well I want you to know that I fell the same. You made my life so much better and I want you to know that I have fallen madly in love with you and I loved being with you this weekend. I can't wait until we are travelling together and until I see you again. Until you come back I'll be waiting for you 'with arms wide open.'
I gently put the phone down and turned my radio up a bit as I listened to a song that reminded me of how I felt for Jeff.
Well I just heard the news todayIt seems my life is going to change
I closed my eyes, begin to pray
Then tears of joy stream down my face
With arms wide open
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
Well I don't know if I'm ready
To be the man I have to be
I'll take a breath, take her by my side
We stand in awe, we've created life
With arms wide open
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
Now everything has changed
I'll show you love
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
If I had just one wish
Only one demand
I hope he's not like me
I hope he understands
That he can take this life
And hold it by the hand
And he can greet the world
With arms wide open…
As soon as the song finished my phone rang. I picked it up and said hi to Jeff. He told me that he loved the song and he loved me. I wished him luck in his match and promised that I'd try and catch it. Jeff told me not to work too hard and he'd see me at the end of the week.
I was just packing up my things when there was a knock on my door. Shane walked in and asked if we could talk. I sat back down. Shane asked me how I was doing. I told him I was fine. He also asked how Jeff was. I didn't know anyone knew about us. Shane told me not to worry he just wanted to make sure I didn't get hurt by him. I told Shane not to worry because I wouldn't get hurt. Shane grinned and said he was just looking out for me. We talked about the video and other projects I had devised. I told Shane that I had a small concept for a 3 count video that I'd like him to look at once I had finished this one. Shane told me to just drop it in his office and he'd go over it. We talked about the Xtreme video I was working on at the minute. I showed Shane a few more of my ideas and we discussed them in detail. Suddenly an alarm went off. I told Shane not to worry it was just to remind me when Raw started so I could watch Jeff. Shane grabbed my arm and told me that we should be comfortable whilst we watched it. I followed him through to his office where we sat on the sofas and watched Raw. It was a great show and I had loads of fun watching it with Shane. During the show Jeff was in a match against HHH. It was a great push for Jeff because it put him in the main event. Matt and Amy were at ringside cheering him on. I asked Shane why no one had told me Jeff was going to be in the main event. Shane smiled and told me that they had decided he deserved a shot so he was gonna be feuding with HHH up until the next PPV. I was shocked at first but happy because he deserved a shot. We continued talking for another hour before we both went home. I told Shane that I'd see him in the morning.
For the remainder of the month I finished up all the pre-production for the video. We had it all set to go a week earlier than expected.
I flew out with Jeff on the Monday morning. We all had a meeting that afternoon to discuss what the video would entail. Matt, Jeff and Amy were all happy because they got to go home for some of the segments in the video.
We filmed for three weeks solid. We went backstage at the arenas and traveled with them on the road. Whilst we were down in Cameron I was introduced to Gilbert, Jeff's father. We all had dinner together and Gilbert asked me loads of questions. Jeff told his dad to chill out because I wasn't gonna hurt him. Whilst Jeff was doing the dishes later on I told Gilbert that I loved Jeff and I would never hurt him. Gilbert smiled and told me he was glad to hear that. Jeff smiled at me from the doorway. After dinner we drove back to Jeff's new house. Whilst we were laid in bed Jeff asked me if I was happy. I turned to look at him and asked him what made him say that. Jeff told me that I made him happy and he just wanted to know how I felt. I told Jeff that everytime I saw him I smiled, and everytime I was in his arms I was the happiest person in the world. Jeff leant down and kissed me and told me he was glad I was happy.
Whilst we were filming the video I got to know Matt and Amy a lot better. Jeff had asked me to travel with them to arenas and everywhere, instead of in the van with everyone else. I made sure it was alright with everyone else before saying yes. Whilst we were travelling I got to see a different side to Matt and Amy. When there were no fans or cameras around, and they could be themselves, they were so gentle and loving. You could tell by seeing them alone that they were madly in love. One afternoon whilst we were in the car I turned to them and asked why they had chosen to keep their relationship a secret. Amy told me that at first they were friends but the loneliness on the road had gotten to them both and they had fallen in love. They had decided to keep the relationship quiet because they didn't want the entire world knowing their business. I agreed with her and told her I was glad that I wasn't in the spotlight.
Before long we got to the final day of shooting. Our last day was at the beach. It was concentrating on Amy Jet skiing. Matt and Jeff were sat on the beach and we interviewed them as well. Once we had finished shooting I thanked everyone and told them that it was all done. It was a Friday afternoon and everyone had the weekend off. The rest of the production team drove back to the offices with everything. I stayed down at the beach with Matt, Jeff and Amy. We sat on the beach with a barbecue as the sun went below the horizon. Matt and Amy said goodnight not long after and went back to Amy's, which was only a five minute walk away. I sat leaning against Jeff for a while longer just enjoying the feeling of being in his arms. He told me that he didn't want this weekend to end because it was gonna be a month before he could see me again. We were both too busy with work and commitments to get any time off. I told Jeff that the month would go fast and we could still talk everyday over the phone. Jeff leaned down and whispered that he loved me before kissing me. We eventually made our way back to the rental car and drove back to Jeff's.
That weekend seemed to go by really quickly. Before we knew it, it was Sunday afternoon and we were headed to the airport. When we got to my terminal I couldn't stop the tears. Jeff promised to ring me in a couple of hours and that he'd ring me everyday until he could come home with me. I hugged him and kissed him. I whispered that I loved him and I couldn't wait for the month to be over.
The flight home was long. The closer I got to my home the further I got from Jeff. I grabbed my bags and climbed into a waiting cab.
As soon as I got home I climbed into the shower before going to bed.
I was up early Monday morning so I could get to the office early. The first day was spent logging all of the material. I spent the next two weeks locked in an edit suite with Rob, a guy who has become a good friend and my right hand man. We ordered take-away for in the suite and didn't leave until after midnight almost everyday. Spending all of my time in the edit suite made the time without Jeff go by quicker than I thought. By the time we were finished there was only two more weeks until I could be with Jeff again. I was sat in my office late at night watching the final copy of the video. I was just about to start watching it when there was a knock on my door. Shane walked in and asked if I was busy. I told him I was just about to watch the finished copy of the 'Team Xtreme' video if he wanted to join me. We both sat down and watched the video. By the end I was feeling really proud. For my first professional piece it looked brilliant. The graphics were bright and edgy and the music blended perfectly. Shane congratulated me on a job well done and said I should be very proud of my work. Before Shane left he told me that Vince wanted a meeting with me first thing in the morning. I told him that it was no problem because I'd be in bright and early.
When I got home there was a message from Jeff on my machine. He told me that he was really missing me and hoped I wasn't working too hard. He asked me to watch Raw on Monday because he had something very important to ask me. He whispered that he loved me and he'd see me soon. I had a quick shower before climbing into my bed. Before I went to sleep I drew a few rough sketches of the cover of 'Team Xtreme' to show Vince in the morning.
I was at the office for 8:30 the next morning. I asked my receptionist to call Vince and ask when he'd like to meet me.
Vince walked down to my office half an hour later. He came in and sat down. The first thing he said was that Shane had told him about the video and how good it was. I handed Vince the finished copy and all the paperwork to go with it. I also handed him the sketches I had done of the cover. Vince promised to watch it as soon as he got back to his office. Vince asked me if I had ever considered working in TV to get a bit more experience. I told him that I had started out in TV and I wouldn't mind going back to the right show. Vince told me that they had a placement come up as Assistant Producer on Raw and Smackdown. I asked Vince if I would still be able to work on the videos. He told me that when I next had an idea ready for a video then he would give me time off from TV to complete it. I told Vince that I'd love to work on TV and asked him when I could start. Vine smiled and told me to pack a bag because I was leaving for New York at noon. I thanked him and rushed home to pack my bag. By the time I got to the airport my flight had already been booked. I had decided not to tell Jeff that I was there.
When I landed in New York I was greeted by Amy. She told me not to worry because Jeff didn't know anything about this. I thanked her and we both climbed into her rental car. When I got to the arena I left my bags in her car and went to meet the producer in the production truck. He introduced himself as Dave and told me a bit more about what I'd be doing. He explained that Vince had faxed him asking him to keep me out of the way until the show started because no one wanted Jeff to know I was here until the right time.
I stayed in the production truck all afternoon watching the practice on the screens. I was given a sheet that told me exactly what would be happening on the show. There was a section in the show about halfway through where Jeff would be in the ring alone. For everyone else's promo there was notes to say what they would be talking about, but for Jeff's it was just left blank. I asked Dave about it and he told me that I'd have to wait and see. I was sat watching the screens when Matt walked in. he sat next to me and asked me how I was. I was shocked at first and asked him what he was doing here. Matt grinned and told me not to worry because Jeff still didn't know hat I was here. Matt told me to make sure I was in the pit when Jeff was in the ring.
It was just before 9pm when I was told to walk down to the gorilla pit. I had already heard Jeff's music start and watched him start to walk down to the ring. I stood in front of a TV screen and watched as Jeff was handed a microphone. "Tara, I hope you're watching this at home. Normally I wouldn't come out here to do this but it's been almost a month since I last saw you and this is something I need to do. I know we've only been together three months but I have fallen so deeply in love with you that my heart has ached all this time we've been apart. I see my brother and Lita backstage and see how much in love they are and I realized that this is something I need to do. I really miss you and I want you with me. Tara, I want to wake up with you in my arms every morning for the rest of our lives. What I'm trying to say is Will you marry me?" I was shocked at first. Matt walked up to me and told me that Jeff meant everyword that he had said, it wasn't scripted. I took a deep breath and realized that I needed time to think. I turned around and walked to Jeff's dressing room. I sat in the corner just thinking. We had only been together a few months but I did love him and I wanted to spend my life with him. I remembered the time we had spent together. Suddenly I heard the door open. Jeff walked in on his mobile phone. I could hear him muttering to himself. I suddenly realized that he was trying to call me. I slowly stood up and took the phone from him. I was stood just behind him so he hadn't noticed me. As soon as I took the phone away he turned around about to say something. As soon as he spotted me his jaw dropped. I said hi to him before he picked me up and kissed me. When we eventually broke apart I asked him if he meant what he said. Jeff put me down and got down on one knee. He pulled a ring out of his pocket and asked me again to marry him. I looked at the ring and then at Jeff before kneeling down and whispering Yes. Jeff gently slid the ring on my finger before kissing me. When we broke apart I smiled and told him that I loved him and I had really missed him. We kissed again before Jeff asked me what I was doing there. I told him that Vince had offered me a job as assistant producer for Raw and Smackdwon. Jeff grinned and said that meant I would be on the road with him. I told him that it meant we could be together more often. Jeff pulled me closer and kissed me again. He slowly started to lean me backwards until we were both laid on his dressing room floor. Suddenly the door opened and Matt and Amy walked in. Jeff broke away from the kiss and asked his brother if he ever knocked. Matt grinned and said it looked as though we were happy to see each other. Jeff took my left hand and showed it to Matt and Amy. They congratulated us before making there excuses to leave us alone again.
We eventually left he dressing room an hour later. I left Jeff to talk to Matt whilst I went to find Dave. Dave told me that he was happy for me and Jeff and told me that I would be starting work for real tomorrow night. I thanked Dave and told him I'd see him in the afternoon.
I climbed into the car with everyone whilst we drove to the hotel. Jeff carried our bags up to his room whilst I said goodnight to Matt and Amy.
As we laid in bed I kept looking at my ring. Jeff smiled down at me and asked me if I was happy. I rolled us over so I was laid on top of him and kissed him gently. I told him that I was happy because I was with the person I loved most in the world. I kissed him again and told him that I was in his arms and I would always be in his arms. Jeff pulled me closer and kissed me more passionately.
We decided to have a long engagement. We both agreed that we didn't want to get married straight away because we were in no rush. We decided to wait about a year and have our wedding next summer.
That afternoon Jeff climbed onto the coach with Matt and Amy whilst I traveled with Dave. When we all got to the arena I was ushered into a production meeting with everyone. I was given my instructions for the night. I grabbed everything I needed and headed to the pit. The staging was almost up and the cameras were just about to be set up. I checked everything was running smoothly out there before dropping off a copy of tonight's schedule to everyone who needed one. I handed one out to the backstage crew and then to the wrestlers. I got congratulated by a lot of people and they all wished me luck. I went by Jeff's dressing room last. He was sat talking to Matt and Amy. I handed Matt and Amy there sheets for the night. Jeff pulled me into his lap before I could say anything. He gently kissed me and asked me if I was having fun. I told him I was but I had work to do. Jeff looked sad at first. I kissed him again before handing him his sheet for the night. I told them all that if they had any problems that I'd be around the arena all night. Jeff looked up at me before I left and told me that he had a problem. When I asked him what he told me that I hadn't kissed him goodbye. I walked back up to him and kissed him before leaving the dressing room.
The show went fine that night. Everything ran smoothly apart from during Amy's match. One of her moves went wrong and she ended up landing on her wrist. Matt was in the ring straight away and you could tell by looking at it that she had broken her wrist. Matt gently picked her up and carried her backstage. Jeff followed behind them. Amy was rushed to the hospital. Jeff stayed whilst Matt went with her. The show finished five minutes early so we had to extend the main event at the last minute. We just added a bit more trash talking and more celebration to make up the time. I was really worried about Jeff by the time we got to the end of the show. He had looked really shaken up when Amy got hurt and I hadn't seen him since then. As soon as the show was finished I went to find Jeff. He was sat in his dressing room alone. I sat next to him and asked him how he was doing. He told me he was fine it was just a shock to see Amy get hurt like that. I told Jeff to grab his things and we'd go and see her at the hospital. We jumped into the car and drove to the hospital. Matt told us that her wrist had been almost shattered and she was gonna be out of action for four months. She was really upset about it and kept saying she didn't want to be at home alone for four months. She couldn't travel because she was going to have to have physio on it a couple of times a week for the next four months. They were keeping her in the hospital because they had to place a steel pin in her wrist to keep it together until it healed. Matt stayed at the hospital with her whilst I went back to the hotel with Jeff. Whilst Jeff was in the shower I called Shane at home. I apologized for calling him so late but explained what had happened. I also explained about an idea that I had had since Amy couldn't travel for four months. Shane listened to me and then told me he'd sort it out with his dad but there shouldn't be a problem.
That night for the first time we climbed into bed and simply fell asleep in each others arms.
When we got up the next morning there was a message from Shane telling me that Vince had no problem with my plan and he though it would be good for Amy and me. There was also a message from Matt telling us that Amy was having her operation first thing. I climbed into the shower with Jeff and kissed him good morning. When we got out I told him that I wouldn't be travelling on the road with him until Amy was back on the road. Jeff looked at me sadly and asked me why. I told him that I was going back to Connecticut to work on my videos and if Amy agreed she was coming as well. Jeff asked me if I was sure I wanted to do this. I told him that I'd miss him but I would like to work on my videos. He kissed me and told me that it was my choice and he'd stand by me.
We got to the hotel at about 11am. Amy was still in theatre and Matt was pacing the waiting room. Jeff grabbed his brother in a hug and told him to calm down. Matt told us that she should be out any time soon because she had been in over two hours already. I hugged him as well and asked him how he was doing. He told us that he was scared that Amy wouldn't wrestle again and that he was scared because she was hurt.
Jeff and I waited until Amy was out of theatre. We were all told that she was doing fine and everything had gone well. We left Matt to be with her and told him we'd be back in the morning. That afternoon Jeff and I went for a drive out of town. We found a small clearing away from everything and stopped there for a couple of hours. We were laid on the back seat of the car with the roof down. I was leaning against Jeff's chest listening to his heartbeat. Jeff asked me when I was flying back home. I thought for a moment and told him that I would be leaving at the end of the week so we still had two more full days together. He leaned down and kissed me gently and told me that he was gonna miss me when I went. I turned round and told him that I would miss him as well but we'd be together soon and we still had some time left before I left. Jeff pulled me closer and kissed me again. He grinned at me and asked me if I thought these seats were comfortable. I told him they were ok and asked him why. To answer me Jeff pushed the button to close the roof.
It was late by the time we got back to the hotel. There was a message from Matt telling us that Amy was doing fine and she was looking forward to seeing us in the morning.
We climbed into bed and Jeff quickly pulled me on top of him.
That night we didn't get very much sleep but neither of us were complaining.
We both had a shower and got dressed before going to visit Amy. She was sitting up in bed with her right arm covered. It was propped up on a pillow and was completely covered. She said hi to us and asked how we were. I told her we were fine but we had been worried about her. Amy told us not to worry because even though it hurt she'd be back soon enough. Jeff told her she wasn't gonna rush back because she'd only get hurt worse if she didn't fully heal. Amy smiled and jokingly said 'yes dad.' We all started to laugh at that. Amy moved her arm a bit and grimaced in pain. Matt was immediately at her side asking what was wrong and if she needed anything. She tried to tell him she was fine but he would listen. She grabbed hold of his collar and pulled him closer. She kissed him and told him that she was ok. He eventually calmed down and sat back down. Jef told his brother to go and get some drinks with him from the café. Whilst they were gone I sat on the edge of Amy's bed. I told her that I had spoken to Shane about her wrist and he had agreed that if she wanted to then she could come and stay with me until she was cleared to wrestle. Amy asked me what I would be doing about my producing. I explained how I was going back to Titan Towers to work on my videos until she was fit enough to wrestle. Amy asked me if I was sure I wanted to be away from Jeff for so long. I told her not to worry because Jef could always visit at weekend and we could talk everyday. I told her that I was sure I wanted to do this, not only did it give me more time on my videos but it also gave me more time to get to know her. She told me that in that case she'd love to. At that minute Matt and Jeff came back. Matt asked what we were planning so Amy filled him in on everything. Matt asked me if I was sure. I told him not to worry because everything was sorted out.
I flew back home the day before Amy was released from the hospital. Matt and Jeff had been given the rest of the week off so Jeff flew home with me and Matt was flying out with Amy. As soon as I got back home with Jeff I climbed into his arms and kissed him. When we broke apart he asked me what that was for. I smiled and told him that Matt and Amy were arriving in the morning and I wanted to spend as much time in his arms before then as I could. Jeff didn't say anything else he just picked me up and ran upstairs with me.
When Matt and Amy arrived the next morning, Jeff and I were exhausted. I got dressed and went to open the door whilst Jeff started to get up. Matt took all of Amy's bags up into my spare room. I made a coffee for everyone whilst we waited for Matt to reappear. Amy's arm was in a pot and a sling to protect it. We were all sat at the table drinking our coffee when Jeff eventually walked downstairs. I got up to get his coffee for him. When I turned round he was sat in my seat. He grabbed hold of my arm and pulled me down into his lap. Matt laughed at his brother and told him he looked like he had been up all night. Jeff smiled and told his brother that he had. I tried to slap Jeff but he took my hand and kissed it before kissing me softly.
That afternoon Matt and Jeff had to fly out for the show tomorrow night. Jeff ordered a taxi and we all sat and waited for it. Whilst the driver was loading up the car I pulled Jeff into my arms and kissed him passionately. I told him that I was gonna miss him and I'd see him as soon as he could come back. Jeff kissed me and promised to call as soon as they got to the hotel. Matt and Amy were saying goodbye as well. Just before they walked out the door Matt turned to me and asked me to make sure Amy got better. I promised I would. Matt hugged me and said he'd see us both soon. I stood in the doorway with Amy and watched as they drove away in the taxi.
That night I couldn't be bothered to cook anything, and Amy couldn't cook anything. We went through one of my drawers and chose a take-away. We ordered it and sat talking. I asked her if she had any plans for the next four months besides physio. Amy said she had a meeting with Vince in the morning about what she was gonna do.
The next morning we both got up and I gave Amy a lift to the office. I showed my security pass before we went up to Vince's office. Whilst Amy was in with Vince I went to find Shane. As soon as he saw me he congratulated me on my engagement to Jeff and my very first video being given the go ahead for release. I couldn't believe it until he handed me my very own copy. I looked at it before hugging Shane. I told him that I was gonna have to get a copy of the cover to frame for my office. Shane handed me a framed copy of the cover and a couple more copies of the video. He told me that one was for my office, one was for me and one was for whatever. I told him that I was gonna send it to Matt and Jeff straight away. Shane told me that I should be very proud because there was a big demand for my work in the business now. I told him that I had my portfolio and notebook in my office for him to look over for whatever video I could do next. Shane told me that he'd be through some time this afternoon to go over them with me.
I walked back down to my office and sorted through the post on my desk. I opened up a letter from England. I was shocked to see it was from my little sister. I picked up my phone and called her mobile. She was really shocked to hear my voice. I asked her how she was going and told her that I was sending her something through the post that should get to her in a couple of days. We talked for a while and she asked me if I was going out with Jeff hardy. I told her that we were engaged and I was madly in love with him. Sarah was happy for me and told me that she missed me. I told her I missed her as well before we said goodbye.
I was just going through the rest of my mail when there was a knock on y door. Amy walked in and asked if we could talk. I told her to have a seat. Amy told me that Vince had offered her a chance to spend her time at the office with me if I wanted to. I told her that it was her choice but if she wanted to then I'd love her company. Amy smiled and said she was glad I had said that because as of now she was gonna be working with me in the office.
I spent the rest of the morning going over what I did all day.
That afternoon Shane came down to go over my notes and ideas. We both decided to go with the 3 Count idea that I had. Once Shane had gone Amy helped me collect as much information on the 3 count members. It helped having Amy with me because she had trained with two of the members. We printed out all of the information and took a walk down to the video library. We booked out all of the 3 Count matches so we could go over them at home and choose what footage we wanted to use.
That evening we both sat around eating Chinese and going over the footage of 3 Count that we had. We highlighted all of the footage that would be good in the video.
The next morning we both presented our work to the rest of the team. Everyone was delegated there own work again and this time I left the directing duties up to my second. I worked on everything but decided to stay at home instead of travelling to do the filming. My team were sent out with clear instructions of what shots they needed and what question to ask.
As soon as the footage was all shot myself, Amy and Rob logged it all.
It took us just over two weeks to complete the video. I drew up some rough sketches of the cover again to show Vince and Shane. We entitled this one 'can't get you out of my heart – the story of 3 count.' It was the title of their entry music.
Over the next four months Amy went through all of her physio. To keep the fans interested they kept showing her updates as part of skits. This was fun for Amy because Matt was always shown at physio with her. About a week before Amy was set to return Vince granted Matt and Jeff the week off. We all traveled down to Cameron for the week. For most of the week Jeff and I didn't leave his house. A month earlier the first Team Xtreme video was released. It went straight to number one in its charts. The 3 count video was scheduled to be released in two weeks time. I was laid in Jeff's arms watching the 3 count video. Jeff couldn't help laughing when we got to the bit with Shannon and Shane dancing. Jeff had grown up with them both and he always fund there angle hilarious. I had to laugh as well because it was so corny. I was soon laughing so hard that I nearly fell off the chair. Jeff stopped the video and pulled me closer to him. he rolled us over so he was on top and started to kiss me. We were just getting into it when the phone rang. We ignored it and let the machine get it. It was Matt. "Jeff I know you're both there because you haven't left that house in a week. I'm guessing that you're a little bit busy at the moment so I won't keep ringing. I was just wondering if you'd both like to come out for a meal tonight with me and Amy. Call me as soon as you get time." I looked at Jeff and asked him if he wanted to go for a meal. Jeff smiled and said if I wanted to then he'd love to. I told Jeff that he could ring Matt in a bit but for now I wanted him to take care of me. I quickly pulled Jeff's shirt off and threw it across the room. I rolled us onto the floor where I continued to pull off all of his clothes. Jeff started to take mine off when he remembered something. He looked at me sadly and told me that we couldn't do anything because he had no protection. I thought for a moment and then asked Jeff if he loved me. He nodded yes, I also asked him if he'd slept with anyone since we got together. Jeff looked at me upset that I would think that. I told him that since we were in love and he hadn't slept with anyone then we didn't need anything. Jeff asked me if I was sure. To answer him I pulled him closer for a kiss. Jeff didn't have to ask me twice. He quickly threw the rest of my clothes along with his.
An hour later we were laid in each others arms. I kissed Jeff and told him that I loved him. He kissed me back and whispered that he loved me as well. Suddenly the phone rang. I reached up and grabbed the receiver. I said hello to Amy. She asked if Jeff and I wanted to go out for a meal with her and Matt in a couple of hours. Jeff was busy kissing down my neck, I quickly told Amy that we'd meet them at Matt's in about an hour. I said goodbye quickly before putting the phone down. I pulled Jeff closer and started to kiss him again.
We got to Matt's only five minutes late.
Matt kept on grinning at us both until I asked him what was wrong. He asked if we'd been having some fun. Jeff told him not to be so nosy. I told Jeff that it was ok and told Matt that I had only been having as much fun as him and Amy. Amy grinned and told Matt that I had him there. He took hold of Amy's hand and they both climbed into the back of the car. Jeff opened my door and helped me.
My new Creed CD was playing on the way to the restaurant. As we got there it started to rain. A storm was approaching really fast. I could hear the thunder rumbling whilst we were eating our meal. It made me feel a bit nervous. Jeff could see how nervous I was getting and excused us both for a minute. We walked to the toilets and Jeff asked me what was wrong. I told him that Thunder storms made me nervous. Jeff smiled and kissed me. He told me that I didn't need to worry because he'd be here to protect me. I kissed him back before we went back to our seats. Amy asked me if I as alright. I told her that I was fine. Jeff squeezed my hand under the table. The rest of our meal went fine. It was a gorgeous meal and we all had loads of fun being together. It seemed like ages sine we were last sat around able to talk. Jeff didn't drink because he was driving. I told Jeff that I'd only have OJ because it wasn't fair on him. Jeff told me not to worry because he didn't mind. I had a couple of drinks but drank OJ whilst we were sat in the bar.
On the way home the storm seemed to get worse. We were driving down the back roads listening to Creed when suddenly lightning struck a tree just in front of us. It all happened so fast that we couldn't do anything. One minute we were driving along and the next Jeff swerved the car so hard that it started to roll. It seemed to roll forever and I must have blacked out. The next thing I knew we were laid in our seats. I slowly looked over to Jeff and I could see all the blood. I heard something in the back. I said Matt's name. He asked if I was alright. I told him that I couldn't move my legs and I hurt all over. He asked how Jeff was. I told him I couldn't tell because there was so much blood. Matt leaned forward and checked on his brother. All he had was a cut down the side of his face. I asked him how he was. He told me that he thought he had broken his arm but apart from that he was ok. I tried to ask him about Amy but he told me to relax because he was gonna try and get help. I told him not to leave me. Matt told me not to worry because he'd come straight back. I asked him to hurry. Once Matt had gone I started to hear music. I realized that the CD was still playing. It was playing my song for Jeff. I listened to the words and couldn't stop the tears. Suddenly sensed Jeff move. I looked over and saw him start to move. I said his name. Jeff slowly looked over at me and asked me how I was. I told him I was ok but I was scared. Jeff slowly reached up and wiped away my tears. He whispered that he'd always be with me. I started to panic and told Jeff not to go. He whispered that he loved me. I grabbed his hand and told him he had promised never to leave me. Jeff quietly said he would always be with me before his eyes closed for the final time. The tears really started to come. I heard the last few lines of the song before my eyes started to close.
That he can take this life
And hold it by the hand
And he can greet the world
With arms wide open…
When I opened them again I was looking up at a bright light. I called for some help and suddenly a nurse was stood over me. She asked me how I was feeling. I told her my head was killing and I wanted Jeff. She looked at me sadly before going to get a doctor. The doctor came in and injected me with a painkiller. It made me start to feel really drowsy.
When I woke up again my head wasn't hurting anymore. I tried to sit up but my right arm was in plaster. I pressed my call button and asked the nurse to help me sit up. She called another nurse over and they both helped me to sit up. Once I was sat up I asked them what had happened to Jeff. When they wouldn't tell me anything I tried asking what had happened to Amy. Still they didn't tell me anything. I demanded that someone tell me something before I got out of this bed and found out myself. Suddenly I heard a voice telling me to calm down. I looked over to the door and saw Matt stood there. He had a huge plaster down the side of his face and his arms was in a sling. He asked the nurses to give us time alone. They both left and closed the door behind them. As soon as Matt was close enough I pulled him into a hug and told him I was so scared. I told him that Jeff had woken up not long after he had gone for help, and how he had told me he loved me and would always be with me before he closed his eyes. I looked up at Matt and could see the tears in his eyes. I asked him to tell me where Jeff was. Matt moved away from me a little way and quietly told me that his injuries had been too severe he hadn't made it to the hospital. I was in shock at first but then the tears came and I couldn't stop them. I begged Matt to tell me different but he couldn't. he held me tightly as I cried. I suddenly realized that he was on his own and asked him where Amy was. Matt tried to hide his tears but he couldn't. he told me that Amy had been killed on impact. Apparently when we had flipped the first couple of times her head had smashed into the window and she had died instantly. I grabbed hold of Matt's shirt and tried to pull him even closer. We just held each other as we cried for our loved ones.
That night the nurses gave Matt the option of staying or going back home. I begged him to stay. I told him that I didn't want to be alone. Matt promised that I wouldn't be alone. Matt held onto me until I had cried myself to sleep. The next morning the doctor came in to check on me. He explained that I had broken my left leg and injured the ligaments of my right knee. My right arm had been shattered when I used it to protect myself upon impact. He asked me how I was feeling. I told him I was numb and I just wanted to go home. The doctor told me that I could go home at the end of the week.
Matt was stood outside my room talking to the doctor. When he came back in he tried to smile at me. I asked him what was wrong. He told me that Jeff and Amy were gonna be buried on Wednesday and the doctor had given me a day release if I wanted to go and say goodbye. I asked him if he'd come and get me Wednesday morning. Matt promised he would.
Tuesday night I was laid in bed looking through a couple of wrestling magazines. I came to an interview with Jeff. I couldn't help the tears as I looked at his smiling features. I couldn't believe that I was never gonna see that smile again. I read the interview and he made me smile for one final time. He was asked a question about If he had ever been in love. Jeff's answer was that before he met me he was disillusioned about love but now that he had found me he knew that love exists and he was madly in love with me and couldn't wait until we were together forever. He also said that the happiest day of his life was gonna be the day that he woke up with his wife in his arms and his child in mine. I smiled and wished that his dream could come true.
Matt came to pick me up at 9 Wednesday morning. He helped me into the car and we drove to Jeff's house. I grabbed Matt's hand as we walked inside. The memories hit me when I stepped through the door. The last time I had been here I was laid in Jeff's arms after spending all day and night making love. I looked over in the corner of the room and saw Jeff's shirt still in a pile. I hobbled over and carefully picked it up. I could still smell Jeff on it and I couldn't believe he was gone. Matt asked me if I was alright, I looked at him and told him that I didn't know what I was gonna do with out Jeff in my life. Matt told me that he didn't know what he was gonna do without Amy. I apologized to Matt for being so selfish. He took my hand in his and told me that it was ok because we could help each other. With Matt's help I went upstairs. I took a deep breath before walking into Jeff's room. I asked Matt to give me ten minutes to get changed. I opened the closet and pulled out a black skirt. As I was looking for a top I found one of Jeff' shirts. I took it out and gently laid it on the bed. I eventually managed to get changed. I put on Jeff's black shirt and then my black leather jacket over the top. I grabbed his sunglasses from the bedside table and looked for something in Jeff's drawer. When I couldn't find it I shouted for Matt. He came running upstairs and asked me what was wrong. I told him that I couldn't find Jeff's cross. Matt told me not to worry because he had it. I told him that if he wanted to keep it then he could. Matt told me that he didn't want the cross he had gotten it for me because Jeff was always telling him how much I liked it. I hugged Matt and thanked him for getting it for me. Matt carefully put it around my neck and asked me if I was ready. I told him that as long as he was with me then I would be.
We slowly walked down the stairs and climbed into the waiting car. On the way to the church I started to feel lonely. I felt someone squeeze my hand and I looked over at Matt. I leant against him until we got to the church. I held onto Matt's arm whilst we walked into the church. Matt hugged Amy's parents and I told them how sorry I was. Suddenly Gilbert was there in front of us. Matt hugged his dad tightly and they both started to cry. Gilbert pulled me into his embrace gently and asked me how I was. I couldn't say anything I just held onto him. Matt helped me walk down to Jeff's casket. I gently stroked his face. He looked so peaceful. I looked up at Matt who was stood looking at Amy. He leant down and whispered something before softly kissing her lips for the last time. I gently touched Jeff's cheek and kissed him softly. I whispered that I was gonna miss him and I wished he was holding me in his arms. I took one last look at Jeff before walking over to Matt. I looked down at Amy and said goodbye to my friend. Matt helped me to our seats. I spent the whole ceremony in Matt's embrace. Near the end I was helped up to the platform with Matt. "I know I haven't know Jeff as some of you but the time that I have known him I fell in love with him. Jeff taught me to be myself no matter what anyone thinks. Everytime I watched him do anything he inspired me. I just can't believe that he's gone. We were supposed to be married next year and now I will never get to see his smile or feel his warmth when I am lying in his arms. Jeff was the love of my life and without him my life's empty.' Matt squeezed my hand. "Jeff was my brother and Amy was my girlfriend. Our dream was to wake up one morning in our bed with the sun shining down on us whilst we hold our first child in our arms. That dream is never gonna come true for me and Amy now. For some reason she was taken away from me and us all. To add to my pain my brother was taken as well. How are we supposed to feel anything but pain when life does this to us. I'm sorry but I don't understand how two bright stars like Jeff and Amy had to be taken, why couldn't it be me. I want to go out and have fun with my brother again and come home to the loving arms of my girlfriend.' I took Matt's hand and we slowly sat back down. Matt was crying now and he just kept asking why. I held onto him whilst the service finished. We slowly walked outside behind the coffins as they were taken to the graveyard. I felt a hand gently touch my shoulder. I turned round and saw Shane. He had been crying and his eyes were red and puffy. He asked me how I was holding up. I told him that I was numb and I didn't know what to do. Shane told me that he was here for me whenever I needed him. I thanked him before he went back to stand with Marissa. I put on Jeff's sunglasses because it was a bright day. I sat down next to Matt and watched as Jeff and Amy were placed on their final stand. I stood up and carefully placed a red rose on Amy's casket and a purple rose on Jeff's. Purple was the color that reminded me of him because this was what color his hair was when I had last been in his arms. I sat down with Matt and watched as our loved ones were lowered into the ground. I wanted to jump in their with him. I couldn't believe that Jeff was really gone. I tried to stand up but I couldn't move. Everyone started to leave and I just sat there. As I sat and watched Jeff get lowered into the ground I remembered a poem I had heard when I was younger. It was called 'To An Athlete Dying Young.'
'The time you won your town the race
We chaired you through the market place
Man and boy stood cheering by
At home we brought you shoulder high
Today the road all others come
Shoulder high we bring you home
And set you at your threshold down
Townsman of the stiller town.'
Matt helped me back to the car and I just sat there numbly until we got back to Jeff's. I asked Matt to give me a bit of time on my own and I'd call him later. Matt wanted to make sure I was alright. I told him I was fine I just wanted to be on my own for a while.
I sat in the living room. I put in one of the home videos Jeff had and pressed play. I couldn't help but smile as I watched Jeff playing around backstage with Matt. They were play fighting and just playing up for the camera. He always liked to play around in front of a camera and it was something I loved the most. I left the video playing whilst I went upstairs to get changed. I pulled on a pair of Jeff's cut-offs and one of his old shirts. I always used to walk around in his cut offs because they were so comfortable. I suddenly heard someone calling my name. I wondered who it was until I recognized Jeff's voice. I walked downstairs and looked at the TV screen. It was silent. I heard Jeff call my name again. I looked around and had to sit down when I saw him behind me. He looked real as anything and I could swear he was in the room with me. Jeff sat next to me and took hold of my good hand. He told me not to cry because he was still with me. I told him he wasn't with me, he had left me alone. I had spent the morning watching him in his casket and saying goodbye to him. Jeff told me that he was always in my heart and he was always looking down on the both of us. I looked confused until Jeff gently touched my stomach. He grinned at me and told me to take care of myself. I promised I would and asked him to stay with me for a while. He told me he couldn't because he was only given a short time to be with me. I told him I wanted to say goodbye but I couldn't, Jeff kissed me softly and I could feel the sparks as his lips touched mine, then as soon as he appeared he was gone. Before I could move there was a knock at the door. I slowly got up and opened it. Matt was stood there. He told me that he knew I wanted to be alone but we had promised the hospital that I'd be back in an hour. I told Matt it was ok. He helped me to climb into the car and we drove to the hospital.
I booked myself back in and told Matt that I'd see him in a couple of days.
I was released Friday morning. I was given painkillers and my appointment for a check-up and physio.
I climbed into the car and was driven home. When I got there I went inside Jeff's house and turned on the lights. The house seemed strange without Jeff there. I hobbled around the house on my crutches turning on the lights. There was a vase of flowers on the table. I hobbled over and read the car. 'Tara, don't be a stranger I'm always here for you, Shane'
I put the card back and hobbled through to the kitchen. I got myself a drink before hobbling back to the living room. I couldn't face sleeping in the bed I shared with Jeff. I spent all night sat in the living room watching home videos and my first video on him. Whilst I was watching the videos I spotted a small wooden box next to one of the chairs. I reached over with my crutch and dragged it towards me. I picked it up and put it on the chair next to me. Inside it was full of photos, scrapbooks, letters and notebooks. I looked through the scrapbooks, they were full of magazine and newspaper cuttings of him, Matt and Amy. There were loads from their independent days to their time in the WWF. The photos were old and new. I found one of two young boys and a woman. I guessed that this was their mom before she died. I turned it over and read on the back that it was taken two months before she died of Cancer. A bit further down there was another picture of just him and his mum. His mom looks really thin and Jeff's looking up at her. On the back is a poem he wrote for her. I read it slowly to myself and it made me realize just how much he loved his mum. I carefully placed the picture down and looked through the rest. Near the bottom was one of me, him, Matt and Amy. It was taken backstage at an arena. We were all smiling. Matt and Jeff were playing around putting two fingers up behind mine and Amy's heads. I smiled as I remembered that day. There were loads of pictures of us backstage and of me and Jeff. At the bottom of the box I found a picture of me and Jeff. It was in a silver frame with our names and date engraved on the bottom. The picture was of just the two of us. I was leaning against Jeff's chest in his yard. We were both smiling and Jeff had bright purple hair. I tenderly touched his features before putting the picture on the mantelpiece. The letters were what I used to send him whilst he was on the road. I told him how much I was missing him and how I couldn't wait until he came home at the weekend. I can't believe that in less than a year I have fallen in love with the man of my dreams planned to marry him and lost him for good. I put the letters back into the box and opened up one of the notebooks. They were full of Jeff's poetry and short stories. As I read them I realized how Jeff felt when he was travelling. He always sounded so lonely. Just reading them made me want to reach out and hold this man. In the front of the second notebook there was a small quote that Jeff had wrote. It reminded me of how I felt for him.
"Every now and then creates a good relationship. It doesn't let your water run dry...nor does it flood you. It surrounds you with the perfect peace." Jeff Hardy
At the back of the book there was another quote that he had written and it just described Jeff's outlook on life.
Control me...Release me...Forget about me" Jeff Hardy
It was his outlook on life when he first started travelling. Since then he had realized that no one would ever forget about him. I read through all of the poetry but this one really made me think.
Empty Tank
Here I am again...tired from not sleeping...Sad from not loving.
I feel miserable again...here on this plane...Here on this earth.
I've done it again...I stayed out all night.
I feel it again...I dread this flight.
Why?
Because I'm sick...Sick of being owned...
I write because I'm sick...Sick of being known.
If I was normal...Would she like me the same?
If I was just a stock boy...Would she still enjoy my name?
I'd like to think she does and would...I believe in her and believe in me she should.
I'm gonna lean my head against this window...Close my eyes and go to sleep.
I'll wake up in the next town...With thoughts beyond deep.
The days will go by as I will just act.
As the days go by I can only look back...At the good times...the fun.
At the bad times...the fun.
I wonder if she misses me as much as I miss her...I wonder if she waits to see me...I wonder if she waits?
I'd like to think she did and would...I believe in her and believe in me she should.
My hear is so curious...My mind is so blank...Without you I'm lost...
I am an empty tank.
I sat in the chair remembering my short time with Jeff. We had some tears and we had laughs, but we always had love. I remember not long after we got together we were laid in bed one night talking. Jeff was telling me about his childhood and how he felt when his mum died. He told me that when he found out he ran and hid up a tree, he wouldn't come down for the rest of the day because he thought the higher up he was the closer he was to his mum. That made me smile when he told me and it still make's me smile when I remember now. Another time we were backstage at an arena. It was whilst Amy was out with her wrist. Matt had been given a week off and so had I. Whilst Matt flew back to be with Amy I flew out to be with Jeff. We were in his dressing room one evening after his match. We were both laid on the sofa watching the show. Andrew was in the ring against Eddie Guerrero. Just watching Andrew wrestle made us laugh. He was good but he had a tendencies to pull some weird faces. Jeff spent all of his matches pointing out the faces he was making and he kept promising to copy him in one of their matches. The next night he had actually got into the ring and started imitating Test. The fans ate it up and everyone in the back, including Andrew, were in stitches. We had some good times and looking back on them now I realize that the good times are over. The tears start up again and I can't stop them this time. I spent a week refusing to answer the door or the phone. I wouldn't see anyone I just wanted to be alone. Matt tried to talk to me but I just shut him out. I had lost Jeff and I didn't want anyone else. I only needed to be near Jeff.
I was laid up on Jeff's bed one afternoon. It had been four weeks since the accident. I still refused to see anyone I just couldn't face it. I felt so lonely and fragile without Jeff by my side. I laid on my bed listening to music. Suddenly the Creed song that came on the night Jeff died. I closed my eyes and listened to the powerful lyrics.
Well I just heard the news todayIt seems my life is going to change
I closed my eyes, begin to pray
Then tears of joy stream down my face
With arms wide open
I could see the tree crash down to the ground. The accident was being replayed in my head. I saw us getting closer to the tree and then I heard the brakes. It was as if everything was going in slow motion.
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
Well I don't know if I'm ready
To be the man I have to be
I'll take a breath, take her by my side
We stand in awe, we've created life
With arms wide open
I could feel the car flipping over and over. I felt every inch of the impact. I could hear Amy screaming behind me before she went deathly quiet. I heard Jeff's sharp intakes of breath. I felt my own heart beating faster until I thought it would burst. I heard Matt shouting for Jeff and then everything was still and quiet.
Under the sunlight
Welcome to this place
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
Now everything has changed
I'll show you love
I'll show you everything
With arms wide open
I was out of my body. I could see Matt's face and feel how scared he was when he saw Amy next to him. I could see the tears in his eyes as he realized that she was gone. I could see Jeff in his seat not moving. He looked so peaceful. He was always my angel. He would get up from all of his falls in the ring but he didn't get up from this one.
If I had just one wish
Only one demand
I hope he's not like me
I hope he understands
That he can take this life
And hold it by the hand
I heard Jeff's breathing get lighter and slower. I could sense the peace that was enveloping him. He was surrounded by a bright light and I could sense him leaving me.
And he can greet the world
With arms wide open…
'JEFF.' I woke up with a start calling out his name. I lid back down trying to control my breathing as I realized it was only a dream. I heard someone run up the stairs and I thought maybe the entire thing was a nightmare. I called Jeff's name again. Matt walked through the door and told me that I was dreaming. I asked him where Jeff was. Matt sat next to me and asked me if I remembered the accident. I realized that I hadn't been dreaming. I started to cry and told Matt that I really missed him. He held onto me and told me he missed them as well but we couldn't change the past. I looked up at Matt and asked him how he'd gotten in. Matt told me that Jeff always left a spare key in the plant pot and he had been so worried about me that he had come to investigate. I told him I was alright I just wanted to be alone for a while. Matt told me he knew what I wanted but I wasn't gonna get it. Matt told me that I wasn't the only person who had lost someone that night. He had lost his brother, his girlfriend and there unborn baby. I was shocked and asked Matt why he hadn't told anyone. He started to cry and said he had only found out a week ago when he read a letter that Amy was going to give to him. I pulled him closer and told him I was sorry. He told me that we both lost people that night and we should help each other through this time. That night Matt held me and I held him as we started to come to terms with losing Jeff and Amy.
Matt didn't feel strong enough to wrestle yet. He had talked to Shane and had told him that he wasn't sure he'd ever be able to wrestle again without his brother. Shane told him that he'd understand but hoped that Matt would think it over before he made his final decision. I had been given time off from work to properly heal. We both had our casts taken off on the same day. I still had to keep my right knee strapped up because the ligaments still hadn't healed properly. I also wore a support on my arm because of how badly smashed up it was. I was told at the hospital that there was a possibility that I would have a permanent limp if my knee didn't heal properly. I was booked into eight weeks of intensive therapy for my knee and arm.
Those eight weeks were hell. The only good thing was that whilst I was in therapy I didn't have chance to think of Jeff and Amy. Matt came to everyone with me. He was always by my side whilst I was there. He encouraged me to keep going when I wanted to give up. After eight weeks I could walk normally and I had rebuilt enough strength in my arm to lose the support. My ligaments still weren't 100 so I still wore a knee brace if I was spending too long on my feet.
When I was finally released from physio Matt suggested that we celebrate. We went out for a meal that evening. It was a small quiet restaurant so we could talk. I told Matt that if he hadn't been with me then I wouldn't have survived losing Jeff. Matt told me that I had helped him as well. Helping me had made him realize that Amy would want him to go on. We both decided that night that we weren't going to give up and we would do something to make sure Jeff and Amy were never forgotten.
On our way home Matt asked me if I would be willing to go with him if he started to wrestle again. I told him I'd love to but I needed to get back to work myself now I was fit again. He was a bit upset at first but then asked me if I would just stand by his side for his first match back. I promised him that I'd be there to hold his hand when he got back into the ring.
The next morning I woke up and immediately had to run to the bathroom to throw up. Matt came by a while later and saw how dreadful I looked. He told me to get dressed because I was going to the doctors to get checked out.
When we got there the doctor did some checks and took some blood. Before I left I asked him if he thought I could be pregnant. The doctor promised he would test me and that the tests would be through in a couple of days. Matt was anxiously waiting in the waiting room. He asked me what he had said. I told him to calm down because my results would be through in a couple of days.
Matt drove us both back to Jeff's. I told him that I'd see him later and thanked him for the ride. I went upstairs and laid on the bed. Suddenly I felt a warm presence next to me. I looked over and saw Jeff laid on the bed. He smiled at me and asked me how I was doing. I told him it was still hard but Matt was helping me a lot. Jeff told me not to worry about the doctors because deep down I knew what the results were gonna say. Jeff gently placed his hand on my stomach. I asked him to keep us both safe. Jeff kissed me softly and promised he would. I asked him if he was happy. He smiled and said that he was with his mum again and Amy was with him, but until I was with him he wouldn't be completely happy. I told him that he was gonna have a long wait. Jeff smiled and told me he knew but he'd be waiting for me. I gently stroked his cheek and asked him what his mum was like, he told me she was wonderful and she couldn't wait to meet me. Jeff told me that he had to go but before he did he wanted me to know something. Matt was there for me and I shouldn't be scared about how I was starting to feel for him because we needed each other. I told Jeff that I didn't want to find anyone else because I didn't want to hurt him. Jeff held onto my left hand and pointed to my engagement ring, he told me that this wasn't where I kept him, I kept him in my heart and nothing would ever change that. He would know when I took the ring off that I had finally accepted that he wasn't coming back and that I should move on with my life before it was over. Both he and Amy wanted me and Matt to be happy until we were all reunited. Told him that I wanted him to be happy as well. Jeff promised that he would always be happy because he was in my heart. He kissed me once more before he disappeared.
I laid there for the rest of the afternoon just thinking about what Jeff had said. I carefully took my engagement ring off and looked at it. I whispered that I would always love Jeff but he was right I needed to move on. I carefully put the ring on my chain and placed it round my neck. I whispered that I loved him but I had to move on. I slowly got up and went to sit downstairs. I picked up the phone and slowly dialed Matt's number. The phone rang and rang but no one answered. Suddenly there was a knock at my door. I opened it and was shocked to see Matt stood there. I told him that I had just tried to call him. Matt didn't say anything he just leant in and gently kissed me. I didn't do anything. When we broke apart Matt apologized and was just about to leave. I pushed the door closed and asked Matt what made him do that. He wouldn't tell me because he thought I'd laugh. I told him that I wouldn't laugh. Matt still wouldn't tell me. I stood in front of him and told him that I had just tried to call him to ask him to come over because we needed to talk. I had only realized we needed to talk after I had spent some of the afternoon talking to Jeff. Jeff had told me that he could make me happy and Jeff wanted us to be happy. I told him how I had finally taken off the engagement ring Jeff had given me because I held Jeff in my heart not in the ring. I pulled Matt closer and whispered that when I lost Jeff I didn't think I'd ever meet anyone again. But I started to fall in love with the last person I dreamed of falling in love with. I began to fall in love with him because he was there for me after we lost Jeff and Amy, and because he knew how I felt. I thought we were good for each other and I wanted to see how good we were with each other. Matt told me that he didn't feel as stupid. He told me how he had driven out to where we had crashed the car. He had sat in his car alone for almost an hour before he felt a presence beside him, when he looked over Amy was smiling at him. At first he didn't want to believe it but she promised that she was there and not in his head. She had told him that she wanted him to be happy and she wanted to move on. He had asked her everything he wanted to know. She had promised to watch over him and wait for him at the end of it all. He had kissed her one last time before she disappeared. On his drive home he had realized that he was falling in love with me and no matter how hard he tried to fight it he couldn't and he didn't want to anymore either. I pulled him closer and kissed him again.
We both spent the rest of day discussing our feelings. We decided to take it slow and no matter what happened we would always be friends.
A couple of days later Matt drove me back to the doctors office to pick up my results. I found out that in just over five months time I was gonna be a mom for the first time with Jeff's child. When I told Matt he was almost as excited as me. He couldn't believe that he was going to be an uncle. I told Matt that I couldn't do it on my own and I wanted him to help me raise the baby. Matt asked me if I was sure. I told him that he had lost his child when he lost Amy, by some miracle I hadn't lost mine and I wanted Matt to feel some of the joy he would have felt with his own. Matt hugged me and gently kissed me. We drove back to his to get something to eat. I sat in his TV room waiting for him. On top of the TV I noticed a video. I picked it up and read the date. Matt came in and told me that it was the Raw from the week after the accident. The entire show had been dedicated to Jeff and Amy and he was trying to find the strength to watch it. I put it in the video and told him we could watch it together. We both sat down and pressed play.
The show opened with an image of Jeff and Amy. It had there names and date they died written along the bottom. I took hold of Matts hand and gently squeezed it.
All through the show the matches were dedicated to Jeff and Amy and the wrestlers talked about them both. Shane was the third person on the screen. He talked about the first time he had met Jeff and Amy and how talented they were. He talked about the fun they had backstage and how much they had changed over the years. Shane told me and Matt that if he could do anything for us then all we had to do was ask.
By the end of the show we were both crying. I told Matt that I needed to get back to work. I couldn't sit around any longer. Matt asked me if I remembered my promise. I smiled and told him that when he had his first match back I'd be by his side. Matt told me that was good because he was hoping to get back on the road at the end of the week. He told me he had already spoken with Shane and everything was cleared. We would be meeting up with them in Florida for Raw on Monday. I told him that I should pack my bags then. Matt told me that there was no rush because h liked the feel of lying here with me in his arms. I smiled and said I liked lying here as well.
That night for the first time since lost Jeff I fell asleep in someone's arms. Matt held me all night and it made me realize how much I had missed being held.
We flew out to Connecticut on Sunday afternoon. The show was being filmed in Stamford on Monday. When we landed I called Shane up and told him we were back. I invited him and Marissa over for something to eat so we could talk.
Shane and Marissa arrived two hours later. Shane hugged me tightly and told me that he had missed seeing me at work and so had the rest of my team. I told him that I'd be back Tuesday morning to get started on a new idea I had. Shane asked me what it was gonna be but I told him he was gonna have to wait. I asked Marissa how she was doing. She told me that she was just waiting for the next five months to be over. I asked her what was gonna be happening in five months. Shane couldn't hide the grin on his face as he told us that he was gonna be a dad for the first time. Matt congratulated them both and so did i. I told Marissa that I'd be joining her at anti-natal classes because I was having Jeff's baby in five months time. Shane was shocked and congratulated me. He asked me what I was gonna do once the baby was born. I told him to calm down because Matt was gonna help me raise the baby. Shane told Matt that it was gonna be fun for them both. Marissa and I went into the kitchen whilst Shane and Matt sat talking. We started to carry the dinner through to the dining room before Shane and Matt jumped up and told us that they'd get everything.
Over dinner we talked about all sorts. Shane wanted to make sure Matt was really ready to get back in the ring. He told him that since I was gonna be by his side tomorrow night he would be fine, he just wanted to have a couple of minutes before the match to say something to everyone. Shane told him it was no problem and he'd sort it out.
When Shane and Marissa finally left I was absolutely exhausted. I told Matt to leave the washing up because I'd do it in the morning. Matt told me to go up to bed and he'd finish it. I took hold of his hand and dragged him upstairs. Matt tried to protest, telling me that it was no problem. I told him that it was a problem because this was my first night back in the house since we had left for Cameron. Matt suddenly realized that the last time we had been here there had been four of us and now there was just the two of us. Matt walked down the hall and opened the door to the spare room. He walked in and turned on the light. On the bedside table was a picture of him and Amy. There were also a couple of her bracelets. He sat on the bed and gently picked up the jewelry. He looked at it and then up at me. He had tears in his eyes and he told me that he didn't think he could do this. I told him not to worry because I would be there for him. I went to sit next to him but he jumped up. He told me that he had to get out of there. I tried to stop him but he told me he needed time alone. Before I could do anything he had run downstairs and out the door. I ran down behind him but I was too late, he had already pulled out of the driveway.
I sat up all night just waiting for him to come back. I must have fallen asleep because I was awoken by my phone ringing. I groggily got up and answered it. It was Shane he asked me if I'd seen Matt. I started to cry and told him that he had run out last night and I hadn't seen him since. Shane told me not to move because he'd be right over. Ten minutes later Shane walked in the door. He immediately pulled me into his embrace and told me it was alright. I told him that Matt had found a picture of him and Amy and some of her jewelry in my spare room, from when she had been staying with me. He had freaked out and run out. Shane handed me a fax. It was from Matt.
Shane.
I'm sorry to do this to you at the last minute but I can't do this. It's too hard for me to get back in the ring without my brother or girlfriend. I don't think I'll ever be able to wrestle without them because I'm not strong enough. Please tell Tara that I'm sorry but I can't be with her. I can't forget about Amy o move on. Take care of her for me and make sure the baby's alright. I know this is only short but until I can sort through my thoughts I can't explain any better.
I know this isn't very professional but as of now I would like to dissolve my contract with the WWF. I can't wrestle again and I hope you understand. Tell my friends goodbye and tell them that I wish them luck.
Maybe one day I'll see you all again but until I can sort through my head and my heart I can't be near anyone.
Matthew Moore Hardy
I started to cry again as I read Matt's fax. I must have done something to scare him. He seemed to be so much stronger than me. Shane told me that it wasn't my fault, he just had to deal with losing two people close to him. I told Shane that I had lost the same two people, one was my best friend the other was my fiancée but I wasn't running away. He tried to calm me down but I was heartbroken. Not only had I lost Jeff but now I was losing Matt. Shane held me tightly and told me that he'd be here for me.
I spent the afternoon sat in my room. Shane had gone back to his office to sort everything out. I just sat in my room looking at my pictures. I got the bottom of the pile and found one of me and Matt playing about. It was taken the day that Amy broke her wrist. That was one of the last times we were all together in the arena. I couldn't believe that Matt was gone now as well. I went downstairs and switched on my laptop. I ordered a Chinese before sitting in front of my computer and started to type. Matt leaving had made me realize that I had to do something so I didn't lose all of my memories. I started to type as fast as I could, all these ideas and memories that had been locked in my head and y heart just came pouring out. I only stopped to get my Chinese and pay for it. I must have been up all night just typing away. By six am I had created an idea for a new video. I printed it all out and went to have a shower. I grabbed a pair of black jeans and a black top. I threw on my leather jacket and Jeff's sunglasses. I jumped into my jeep and drove to the office. Shane was sat in his office. I walked straight in and saw the look of shock on his face. I handed him the printout and told him that I'd be back at work on Monday but I had to go and do something before then. Shane told me that if I was going to find Matt then it was going to be a long search because Gilbert had told him that Matt had grabbed some things and left his home without telling him when he'd be back. I sat down shocked. Shane told me that Matt needed some time alone before he contacted anyone, but he was sure that Matt would come back one day. I told Shane that I still needed to go down to Cameron to see for myself. Shane told me that he understood and he'd be waiting for me when I came home. I told him to read the idea and tell me what he thought.
I left the office and climbed back into my jeep. I drove home and grabbed my already packed bags. I turned on the CD player and set off for Cameron. I finally got there Thursday night. I went straight to Jeff's and fell asleep in our bed.
I woke up the next afternoon. I had a shower and got dressed. I grabbed some orange juice and left the house. I drove to Matt's and looked for the spare key. I found it in the pant pot. I opened the door and went in. there was no sign of him. Most of his clothes had gone as well as his photos. I walked through the house just searching for any clues as to where he might have gone. I couldn't find anything. I looked in his room but all I could find was an old photo of Jeff and his dad. I placed the picture on the desk and went back downstairs. As I was leaving I spotted an envelope on the side. I walked up to it and read my name. I grabbed the envelope and took it with me. I locked the door and put the key back. I sat in my jeep and started the engine. I put the envelope on the seat next to me and looked at it before I drove away. I was just about to drive past the graveyard when I put my foot on the brakes. I parked the jeep and climbed out. I walked down to where Jeff and Amy were buried. I spotted someone running away from the graves. He was wearing a baseball cap and he was too far away from me. I thought I recognized him but it couldn't be Matt because he had gone. I walked down to the graves and crouched in front of them. There was an envelope against Amy's gravestone. I recognized Matt's handwriting on it. It gently touched the letters of her name and told her that I was missing her. I said I wished she was here to tell me what to do because I was confused and I missed having someone to talk to. I asked her to keep Jeff safe for me until I could be with him. I moved over and looked at Jeff's gravestone. I gently kissed my fingers and touched Jeff's name. I told him that I was so scared and lonely without him, and now I had lost Matt. I asked him what to do because I didn't have anyone now. Suddenly I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up and saw the angelic vision of Jeff. He crouched next to me and took hold of my hand. He guided me up and told me not to worry. I wasn't alone because he was always with me. I asked him what had happened with Matt. Jeff told me not to worry because his brother just needed to sort out his feelings. He was so confused about losing Amy and how he felt for me that he was scared. I asked Jeff to tell me what to do. He gently kissed me and said only I could tell me what to do. He touched my stomach gently and said that our children would be as strong as me. I asked him if they'd be like him, because if they were at all like him then we would all be ok. Jeff smiled and told me that I would bring them up right. I kissed him again and told him I'd see him soon. Jeff smiled and told me that Matt was getting the guidance he needed from two people who loved him. He told me that Amy and his mum were guiding Matt in the right direction and he would be back one day. I felt Jeff squeeze my hand before he disappeared. I looked back at the gravestones of my friend and loved one. I whispered goodbye and said I'd see them soon.
I climbed back into my jeep and drove back to my home with Jeff. I sat in the back yard with a drink and opened the envelope. Inside was a letter from Matt.
Tara.
I know I've hurt you and I'm sorry.
That night when I went into the room that Amy stayed in it brought back all the memories. I couldn't deal with them and I had to get away. It's nothing that you've done it's me. I need time to sort out my head and decide what I want. I was so scared that if I fell in love with you that I'd forget Amy. I know you've always told me that you keep Jeff in your heart and you'll always keep him there. But what if I fall in love with you as much as I was and forget Amy and how much I loved her. I can't take that risk, I've already lost her I can't lose her memories.
Maybe one day I'll come back but I can't promise anything. I know that I won't be getting back in the ring for a longtime to come. If I do ever come back I can't be with you. I can't risk losing another person I loved. I've lost too many people in my life. I'm twenty six years old and I've lost my mum, my brother and my girlfriend. The night that Amy and Jeff died I had a surprise waiting for Amy at home. That night I was going to ask Amy to marry me. I was with her for over two years and I know that we should have been together for the rest of our lives. Because of the accident I never got to tell her how much I loved her or how much she meant to me. I never got to tell the one love of my life that I was happiest when I woke up with her in my arms. I'm sorry to be telling you this but I can't forget the feel of her in my arms. That first morning I woke up with you in my arms, I started to feel happy. Your warmth reminded me of her and that scared me. If things like that reminded me of Amy, what about when we got more serious and you took the place of Amy.
I'm sorry for doing this. I started to fall in love with you so I've got to leave. Shane has been given my notice and it could be a long time until I ask for my job back. Until then I need to be alone so I'm leaving. I'm leaving the WWF, my home and the place I grew up.
Love
Matt….
It was my fault. If only I hadn't started to fall in love with him, maybe he wouldn't have felt so scared and he'd still be here. I'd be watching him in the ring remind me of Jeff and Amy. Now he was gone and I'd never get to hold him again or see him again. I had hurt him by brining back memories of Amy.
I packed my bags and drove back home.
When I got there I called Shane and told him I was back. He asked me to meet him in the morning for a meeting at his office.
I unpacked my bags and had a shower before going to bed. I couldn't sleep peacefully because I just kept thinking about Matt.
When I eventually got to the office I was exhausted. I went into Shane's office and said hi. He told me I looked awful and asked me how I was. I told him I hadn't slept very well last night because I was worried about Matt. Shane told me not to worry because he had something to show me. He pressed play on his video and I watched as Smackdown started. I was shocked to hear the Hardy Boyz theme start. Matt walked down to the ring dressed in black. He looked as though he had been crying. I watched as he grabbed a microphone and waited for the crowd to calm down. He took a deep breath before he started to talk.
"I came here tonight, not to wrestle but to say goodbye. A few months ago I lost my brother and girlfriend in a car crash. Since then my life's been turned upside down. I really miss Jeff and Amy and I can't do this without them. We always wrestled as a team and now that they've gone the team is over and so am i. I'm sorry but I am retiring from active wrestling. I can't fight without my brother and girlfriend. I want to thank you all for your support over the past couple of months. I won't forget any of the letters you sent to me, it meant so much to me. I am really going to miss everyone and maybe one day I will come back. Until I feel strong again I am leaving everything behind." I watched as Matt placed the microphone down and was about to climb out of the ring. He stopped when he spotted people at the top of the ramp. The entire roster was stood there watching him. Suddenly they all started clapping. Andrew, Jason and Adam were stood at the front. Andrew had a microphone. "Hey Mattie, you didn't think you were gonna be able to leave without us saying anything. That night that Jeff and Amy died I was sat at home. When Shane rang me up I couldn't stop the tears. We're all family and I felt as though I had lost a member of my family. I feel for you Matt, I do. I know you've got some stuff to sort out but when you feel ready I'll be your partner. I'll stand by your side and fight with you. I want to promised you that none of us will ever forget Jeff and Amy. They both changed my life so much. If it wasn't for Amy knocking some sense into me I wouldn't have realized that I was madly in love with Trish. If it wasn't for Jeff I wouldn't have laughed so much. He made my life better and I know that I'll always remember them both. Matt you're like my brother and I'm gonna miss you." Andrew started to walk down to the ring and climbed in. He hugged Matt and told him that he would always be here. They both walked up the ramp and everyone disappeared backstage.
Shane stopped the video and told me that Matt had come up Tuesday to do that. He was given the freedom to say what he wanted and so was everyone else. Shane told me that Matt had made him promise to keep me safe and make sure I knew that it wasn't my fault. He promised to come back one day when he felt ready. I thanked Shane and told him I knew he'd be back. Shane told me that he had read the idea I had left him and he had discussed it with his dad. They both agreed that it would be a perfect way to keep Jeff and Amy's memories alive. I thanked him and told him that I'd get right on the case. Shane told me that if I needed anything then he'd be here for me. I hugged him and told him that I'd be alright now I had something to do.
I sat in my office and collected more information. I told my team exactly what was needed and how it was all gonna work.
I worked as much as I could on the video. I took loads of work home at night. I chose the footage I wanted and included some of the home movies I had of them both.
I made a list of the people I wanted to interview about Jeff and Amy. I was going to include there memories in the video. I chose the people who I thought knew them best.
Andrew Martin, Jason Reso, Adam Copeland, Devon Hughes, Mark Lamonica, Shane, Monty Sopp, Joanie Laurer, Paul Levesque, Mark Callaway, Glen Jacobs, Mick Foley, Michael Hayes, Dwayne Johnson, Terri Runnels, Stephanie McMahon, Trish Stratus, Shannon Moore and Shane Helms. The questions were simple, 'What are your memories of Jeff and Amy?' and 'Do you remember the day that they died?'
I ended up with some really good answers from them all. I really wished that I could have spoken to Matt about losing Jeff and Amy but I knew it was too hard. To end the video I went to see Vince. He agreed to write something for the end.
I was sat at home watching the footage I had from the interviews. There were some really touching memories from them all.
Andrew Martin (Test): 'I remember a match that Jeff was in. He was about halfway through when he started to imitate me. He started pulling the faces I pull and copying my moves. I couldn't help laughing especially when he dropkicked his opponent and then pretended he had scored a field goal. I'll never forget how much he could make us all smile. I lost my smile though the day that I found out him and Amy had left us. I was sat at home with Trish. We were talking about something when the phone rang. I picked it up and was shocked to hear Shane. He told me about the accident and that we had lost them. I remember just dropping the phone. I felt numb after that. I knew that part of my smile had gone with them.
Adam Copeland (Edge): My first memory of Jeff was not ling after him and Matt had signed there contracts. He must have only been about21. He was so quiet backstage that a lot of people didn't notice him. I spotted him in the corner one evening and I decided to go and say hi. As I got closer I realized that he was writing something. I introduced myself and asked him what he was writing. He looked up and told me he was writing some poetry. Now if you saw him in the ring you wouldn't believe he wrote poetry, but if you ever got the chance to read it you could see how deep and thoughtful he was. The day that I found out I had lost my friend is a black day for me. I was at home with my fiancée. We were discussing our upcoming wedding. I knew Jeff couldn't wait for his own wedding and I couldn't wait for mine. When Shane called me I thought he was playing a sick joke on me. When he told me that if I didn't believe him I should turn on the news I knew he wasn't lying. I put the phone down and turned on the news. Suddenly on the screen was a picture of the car .It showed a picture of Jeff and Amy. It was in that moment that my heart broke. I started to cry for my friends. Not only Amy and Jeff, but for Matt and Tara as well.
Jason Reso (Christian): I remember the first time I met Amy. I was talking to Matt backstage when she snuck up behind him. She was debuting that night and none of us knew about it. When Matt saw her he picked her up and refused to put her down. I could tell from the way they were looking at each other that they were in love. I know that Matt's dream was to marry Amy and be with her forever. It is a tragedy that at such a young age he not only lost his girlfriend but his brother. All of them are my best friends and I know that our lives will never be the same again. Amy and Jeff brightened up mine and everyone they met. Our lives are so much better having known them. I heard about the accident on the news. I was watching the headlines when it came up. At first I didn't think it was them until I spotted Matt sat there. I just went numb. I don't remember anything else from that day and it's a day that I don't want to remember. I'm keeping the good memories I have of my friends locked in my mind and they'll always be there.
Devon Hughes (D-Von): Do you know what I remember best about Amy, she wasn't afraid of anything. In the ring she used to get up and have a go at us. No matter how often you tried to keep her down she kept getting back up. Jeff was the same. He would never stay down. I think that's what I'll remember about them. They never gave up on anything or anyone. I know that Matt and Amy were madly in love and they were hoping to settle down. Jeff had fallen in love with a girl he had met and he really calmed down when he met her. Even though Jeff's gone he will live on, because he's gonna be a dad. The day that Jeff and Amy died I was just coming back from spending the evening in the gym with Mark. I got home and my wife was sat up waiting for me. At first I thought I had done something wrong but then she told me about the accident. Me legs went numb and I had to sit down. Two bright sparks were taken from us that day and I wish they would re-ignite.
Mark Lamonica (Buh Buh Ray) My memories of Jeff are from being on the road. Everyone would be talking about a load of rubbish and he would jut be sat there writing something. He was always writing in his notebooks. He wouldn't let anyone read them because they were his thoughts and feelings. The day that they died I found out that I was gonna be a dad. So in one day I went from extreme happy to feeling lost.
Monty Sopp (Billy Gunn): Jeff was possibly one of the best flyers in the business. He used to amaze me when he got into the ring. He would get so much height on everything. It was like he was immortal. If only he was immortal than we wouldn't be here today. The day that Jeff and Amy died is a sad day in the WWF. We've all lost so many people in this business it's jut that none have been as young as Jeff and Amy. They had only just begun and it's unfair for their time to be over already.
Joanie Laurer (Chyna): I remember not long after Amy debuted we were in a feud. That feud was fun because she kicked my ass. I know I got my revenge but it was fun while it lasted. I was hoping to work with her again one day, only on the same side as her. Twenty six years old, and already she's gone. She never had a chance to do anything. She never got the chance to have kids with Matt. We used to talk backstage about what we'd do if we ever left wrestling, her answer was always the same. She always smiled and said she would be with Matt with their kids. I was at home with Paul when I found out about the argument. We had been arguing about something when Shane called us. He told u about the accident and I just went silent. I told Paul and it really put everything into perspective for us both.
Paul Levesque (HHH): I remember a match I had with Jeff a couple of months ago. He beat me for the IC belt. I won the belt back the next week but we had some good matches. He always kept up with me in the ring and really made me move. I've wrestled a lot of people in my career but none made me work as much as Jeff. You could blink and miss him he was that fast. He was someone who made me realize that wrestling wasn't the be all and end all of life. I watched him backstage when he asked Tara to marry him. I saw the happiness they shared. Watching them made me realize how much I love Joanie and how short life could be. The night they died I was arguing with Joanie. Since then we haven't argued once. When Jeff and Amy died they made me realize that life is too short to leave anything out
Mark Callaway (Undertaker):Backstage I'm one of the old guys. I've been here for over eleven years so I've seen my share of talent. When Jeff first joined the team with his brother I knew that he would go somewhere. Jeff was someone who would sit backstage and watch all the matches. When I asked him why he watched them all, he just smiled and said he was a fan of wrestling and loved to watch it even now.. It's not very often you hear that from someone backstage so I knew that he was going to last a long time. The accident was terrible. For someone so young and talented to be taken from us is awful. I'll always remember him and how he shined in the ring.
Glen Jacobs (Kane): Amy joined the team in 2000. I remember I was sat backstage during her first match. At first she was just like the rest of the women, standing there cheering on her man. Suddenly I watched as she climbed to the top turnbuckle and executed a perfect Moonsault. From then on I watched her wrestle quite a few more times. She always amazed me that she could get up from anything. No matter what they did to her she got up and got her revenge. I'll never forget that. The day she died was a day I'll never forget. I was at home with my family when Mark called me. He asked me if I'd been watching the news because there had been an accident. I immediately switched it on, and I'll admit when I saw what had happened.
Mick Foley: I've been in this business over fifteen years now. I thought that I was the only crazy dare-devil in the WWF before I watched Jeff and Amy. They both seemed to be suspended in the air. They spent more time diving off insane heights than they did on their feet. When my kids came to visit they always used to go and find Jeff. In his credit he always made time to play with them and talk to them. The day that they died I was at home. I was just reading my kids a bedtime story when my wife shouted me. I ran down stairs and saw the news report. I didn't want to believe it. My son came downstairs and asked me what was wrong. I told him gently what had happened. He cried at first but then he looked at me and asked me if that meant he could wrestle with Owen Hart in heaven. I told my son that he would and Amy would be keeping the peace like she always did.
Michael Hayes: A couple of moths after Matt and Jeff joined the federation I was instructed to take them under my wing. I was told them to teach them about everything. They were given a new image and really began to show people what they could do. Even though we split up I continued to watch them develop. When Amy joined them it wad the best to happen to them. Not only did she make happy but she completed the team. I don't remember where I was when I found out that they had died, and I don't want to remember. As far as I'm concerned that was a black day. All I know is that they are watching down on us all and hopefully they are peaceful.
Dwayne Johnson (Rock): you know in this business people come and go. You see so many people that after a while they all blur into one. Jeff Hardy is someone who stands out in my mind. He was one of the great ones. In a couple of years he could have easily been holding up the heavyweight gold. I'm gonna be a dad for the first time soon and if my child grows up to be anything as loyal as Jeff and Amy then I know that they'll be alright.
I fell asleep whilst I was watching the video.
I knew from the footage that I did watch that it was going to be a good video.
I worked on the video for a month solidly. I edited it all together with Rob. He knew I wanted it to be perfect so we spent even longer getting it perfect. We added soft graphics and music. Towards the end of the video we edited together a montage of their final moments in the ring. Over the top Vince had recorded a small memorial speech for them both. At the very end of the video were some shots from various reports. We had scanned news paper headlines to put over the top of an image of the car. The final image was from one of Jeff's poems, over an image of Team Xtreme.
So it's day by day until the body dies.
Who controls the soul, who leads the way?
Has it paid off?
Remembering to pray.
Once it was finished I took it to Shane. I told him that I wanted him to watch it with me.
By the end we were both in tars. Shane told me that Jeff would be proud of me because I had preserved his and Amy's memory well. I thanked him and told him that he could have a copy as soon as the paperwork was finished.
By the end of the week I had designed a cover and handed in the finished production.
A couple of days later Shane gave me a box with ten copies of the video in. I looked at the case. It was Jeff and Amy posing in their Team Xtreme shirts.
I kept a copy for my office, a copy for me. I sent one to Amy's family and one to Gilbert. I sent a copy and a letter to my sister in England and then had to think who else would want one. I decided that Andrew, Adam and Jason, and Shannon and Shane would want one. I placed them all in envelopes and sent them to the post room to be sent out. I sat in front of my computer with my final copy. I wrote a letter to Matt telling him that I want him to see the video and explaining that Jeff's baby was due in a couple of months and I'd like for him to see his nephew. I put it all into an envelope and posted it to Matt's address. I prayed that he would get the video.
Jeff's son was born three months later. Shane and his wife were with me when I went into labor and they stayed with until the end. I looked down at my baby son and I could see so much of Jeff in him. Shane came in an hour later with some flowers and teddies. He asked me what I was gonna call him. I smiled and looked down and whispered Jeffery Matthew Nero Hardy. Shane told me he was gorgeous. I handed Jeff over to Shane and watched as Shane cooed over him. Marissa had had a baby girl a couple of weeks earlier. She named her Christine Amy McMahon.
I was allowed to go home the next morning so long as I rested. Shane picked me up and took me home. When I got there I found a bunch of flowers and a note. I gently placed Jeff in his crib and opened the note.
Dear Tara,
I know it's been a long time. I received your video a couple of weeks ago. It made me remember why I fell in love with Amy and why my brother was one in a million. These past months alone have really made me sort my life out. I'm not ready to find anyone new yet but I am ready to start seeing people again. I want to tell you in person how much I loved the video. I know that nobody will ever forget Team Xtreme now and how close we all were. All four of us. Thankyou for honoring them this way I know they would have enjoyed it if they were here to see it.
I was sat the other day watching some old home videos. It was from when we all went to the beach with Adam, Jason, Shannon and Shane H. I was watching you and Jeff play about in the water. I could see how much you loved my brother but you've managed to move on. I loved Amy more than I loved life but nothing will bring her back. I understand now that I need to go on. But I also understand that I will never be as strong without them andi need to go slow and careful. Maybe you could call me when you have time and we could talk.
I miss you Tara and I do want to see you again.
If and when you decided to call me I have some news to tell you. Hopefully you will be happy for me and give me some support.
See you soon…
MattI had to re-read the letter twice. I couldn't believe that after all this time he had finally contacted me. I read the number at the bottom of the page a couple of times before picking up the phone. I quickly put it back down. What was I going to say to him. Do I act mad or hurt or casual and pretend like he didn't run away and break my heart. Suddenly I heard Jeff over the intercom. I walked upstairs to his room. I looked in and noticed the window was slightly open. I walked closer to the crib and watched as baby Jeff smiled up at a light. I could feel the presence of Jeff before I saw him. I turned to where my son was looking and smiled slightly as I saw the faint outline of my fiancée. He started to get clearer until he was stood in front of me clear as day. I asked him what he thought of his son. Jeff smiled at me and told me he was perfect. He gently reached down and touched baby Jeff's cheek. Jeff told me not to be scared because Matt wasn't going to hurt me again, he was here to stay now. I told him that I didn't know how to talk to him because it was partly my fault he left. Jeff pulled me into his arms and told me that it wasn't my fault, Matt just found it hard losing people, he had always been the same. I looked up at Jeff and asked him if he was going to keep baby Jeff safe. He gently kissed e and said he had a guardian angel, but it wasn't him. I asked him why he wasn't his guardian Angel. Jeff kissed me again and told me because he was mine. I smiled slightly and asked who Jeff's guardian angel was. He pointed behind me to a picture of Jeff, Matt and their mom. He told me that his mom was looking over our son and her first grandson. I told him to tell her thankyou. He kissed me once more before I whispered goodbye. Jeff pulled away and told me that I had never said goodbye before. I told him that it was time for me to say it. He promised that he was only a name away always. As he appeared he disappeared until I was left in the room with just our son. I went back downstairs and dialed Matt's new number. He picked up on the third ring. I listened as he said hello a couple of times before I found my voice. I softly said hi, Matt said my name asking if it was me. I told him it was and asked him how he was doing. He told me that he wanted to talk to me properly so we could sort things out between us. I told him that I was gonna be in all week if he wanted to come up. Matt told me he couldn't yet and asked if we could meet at the park. I asked him to give me a couple of hours and I'd meet him there. As soon as I had put the phone down on Matt I picked it up again and called Marissa. I asked her to watch Jeff for me for a couple of hours because I had something to do. I dropped Jeff and some things off at Marisa's before going to the park. Matt was already sat waiting when I got there. I said hi to him before we started to walk. We were silent at first until Matt asked me how I'd been. I told him I was fine and I'd been working a lot to get my mind off of things. Suddenly Matt seemed to realize something. He turned me to him and asked me what happened about my pregnancy. I told him I wasn't pregnant anymore. He was about to ask me if I'd lost the baby when I stopped him and told him that everything was fine. I told him about his nephew and watched as his eyes lit up and he smiled for the first time in a long time. Suddenly Matt changed the subject. "That night that I ran away. I got scared. When I went into your spare room and saw some of Amy's things I was scared that I was losing my memories of her. I thought that if I stayed with you Amy would think that I had never loved her and I was just forgetting about her. I couldn't handle the guilt so I just ran away. I know you followed me. I saw you, do you remember when you went to the graveyard after going to my house, I was there. I heard you coming so I ran, but I know you saw me. I didn't want to see anyone so I left you that note. I know it didn't make sense because my head didn't make sense. I packed up a bag and jumped onto one of Jeff's bikes. I've been driving up and down this country all the time trying to clear my head. About two weeks ago i ended up back home. i stopped the bike at the exact same place the car stopped rolling. I gently placed two flowers against the tree and for the first time in years I prayed. I prayed for some direction and help because I was scared. I got my answer whilst I was riding back to my home. I felt Amy's loving arms wrapped around my waist. She was there keeping me safe. I saw her again in our home. She was just standing in the light coming from the kitchen window. She just stood there watching me until I couldn't take it anymore. I ran into her arms and cried. I told her that I needed help. She just held me and told me that she was here for me. She told me that I had to say goodbye because I was hurting everyone by not letting go. "There's someone who is just as scared and lonely as you and she really needs you. I'm gone Matt and I can't come back. I'll always be waiting for you but you have a life to live. Please let me go Matt you need to." I asked him if he thought I didn't go through the same agonizing argument with myself. "Do you think that I had just forgotten about Jeff, he was the love of my life and it's taken me nine months to say goodbye to him. Even after nine months I wake up every morning hoping it's a dream and Jeff's gonna be smiling at me. Every morning I feel the coldness of waking up alone, he's gone and no matter how much I pray he's not coming back. We were supposed to be married in a bout five months but now I'm alone with a child to bring up." Matt told me he was sorry. He didn't mean to hurt me. "I made a decision that day that Amy was right. She wasn't coming back and that was the day that finally managed to start to let go. I stayed up all night just thinking I picked up my memories of Amy and placed them in a box. I put the box away and it was then that I knew I could go on. I went down to their graves the next day and finally said goodbye. I promised to rejoin them both again one day. I prayed that you would see me so I could explain and someone heard my prayer. I know it's just been as hard on you as it was on me and we could have helped each other through this if I hadn't been so scared." I took his hand and gently silenced him with my finger. "We still can help each other. It's gonna be hard moving on, even now we've started to say goodbye. I've still got Jeff's son to raise and I would love for you to help me raise him. Maybe one day we'll both be ready but until then we can be friends." Matt pulled me into a huge embrace and thanked me for understanding and just being me. He asked me if I remembered what I promised him a couple of months ago. I told him that if he ever got back in the ring then I would be there with Jeff at ringside. Matt told me he was glad about that because he would be back in a month. I hugged him tighter and congratulated him. We both went back to Marisa's to collect Jeff. Shane was happy to se Matt and asked him how he'd been. Matt told him he was fine and getting ready for his comeback. I hugged Shane and Marissa and thanked them for all of their help. As soon as Matt saw his nephew he fell in love with him. He was the spitting image of his baby brother and he just couldn't believe he was Jeff's. Matt climbed into my car with me and refused to take his eyes off Jeff. When we pulled up at my house I climbed out and told Matt that it was ok if he wasn't ready to come in. Matt smiled and said that he thought he was ready to overcome his fear and pack up Amy's things from here. I handed Jeff to him and we both walked into my house. Matt smiled when he saw the picture above the fireplace. It was one that had been taken by one of the photographers. It was me, him, Jeff and Amy. Jeff had his arms tightly around me and Matt was doing the same to Amy. Jeff and Matt had their backs to each other and we were all smiling at the camera. I told him that I'd found it in Jeff's closet at home. It was wrapped up in a box with my name on it. Matt told me it was great and it reminded him of happier times.
I took Jeff from Matt and carried him up to his cot. Matt followed me up and I had to stop him. I told him that I had had to pack all of Amy's things into a box a month ago so I could do Jeff's room, I asked him not to be mad with me. Matt told me that he was ok with me packing up her things because it saved him from doing it. When he walked into the nursery he was amazed. It was covered in pictures of him, his brother and Amy. There were framed photos and pictures all over the place. The wall's were a light purple color. Matt smiled and whispered that it was his brothers favorite color. I told him I knew it was that's why I'd painted it like that. I gently placed Jeff in his cot. I watched as he smiled in his sleep. I turned on the monitor and went back downstairs with Matt.
We were up all night talking. We both decided to take it slow and be friends. Matt made me promise that I'd be by his side when he went back into the ring. I promised I would be there for him.
Matt bought himself a small apartment about half a mile from mine. He went to the gym every morning to get ready for his comeback. He was really bulking up so he could survive on his own. Most evenings he'd come over to mine and we'd have dinner together. Jeff always came to work with me. He stayed in the crèche all day whilst I did my work. It was a week before Matt's return. I was sat in my office going over some video ideas. I was also reading through some new angles that I was working on. Vince had offered me the chance to work in the storyline department because I enjoyed writing. I had come up with some decent angles and at the minute I was thinking of one for Matt. I was having a meeting with Stephanie about what we could do when there was a knock on the door. Shane walked in with Jeff in his arms. Shane doted on Jeff like he did his own daughter. They were both in the crèche and he spoilt them both rotten. Stephanie stood up and took Jeff from her brother. She started pulling faces at him making him laugh. She looked up and told me that it was obvious that he was Jeff's son, he was as handsome as his dad. Shane told me that he wanted to see his mom because he was bored in the crèche. I laughed and asked Shane if it wasn't that he was bored. Shane admitted that I was right. He made himself comfortable and asked what we were talking about. We explained that we were trying to put the finishing touches to Matt's angle before he interrupted. Shane acted hurt but then he laughed and said that we knew we didn't mind him interrupting us with Jeff. Shane took Jeff back and told us that he'd see us in a while because he was going for a walk around the building with Jeff. I told him to be careful. Shane grinned and promised he would. Once he'd left we went back to discussing Matt's angle. It was decided that he would challenge for the Intercontinental Championship at his first PPV, No Way Out. It was the first PPV that he was involved in since Jeff and Amy died, not long after Judgement Day.
I went over his angle with him that evening when Matt came over for something to eat.
His first match back was in Stamford, Connecticut. This was in the next town over so we didn't have far to travel. Marissa had offered to look after Jeff for the night but I told her that I was gonna take him with me.
The day of his re-entry Matt was really nervous. He was over at mine at about 8 in the morning. He was so scared that the fans wouldn't react to him. He kept asking me what he'd do if they didn't like him now he wasn't with Jeff and Amy. I told him to calm down because everything would be fine. He asked me what he'd do if he couldn't do it without Team Xtreme. I turned him to look at me and told him that Jeff and Amy were with him right here, I gently held my hand over his heart. He looked down and touched my hand. He thanked me for everything and told me I was right. I smiled and told him I was always right. At about 11am we jumped into my jeep and set off for the arena. On the way we stopped for breakfast. We ate it on our way to the arena. Matt had a small trolley that he put his carry on on. He also put Jeff's things on it. I was just about to pick Jeff up when Matt asked if he could hold his nephew. I handed him over and took the trolley off of him. As soon as we walked in we were both swarmed by people. Andrew, Jason and Adam ran over and asked him how he was. Whilst Adam and Jason were talking to Matt and cooing over Jeff, Andrew walked over to me. He hugged me tightly and asked me how I was doing. I told him I was fine and asked why he never came round to see me anymore. He apologized but promised to come over in the morning. We were busy talking when Matt approached us. He apologized but asked Andrew if he could pinch me for a while because he wanted to ask me something. He handed me Jeff and took the trolley from me. We went to his locker room and put everything down. Matt went to sign in whilst I sorted some things out. When he came back he asked me if I'd do something for him. He pulled out a bottle of red and purple hair dye. He asked me if I'd do him a red streak and a purple streak in his hair for Jeff and Amy. Whilst Matt wet his hair I got everything ready. I did both of his streaks and decided to do two in my own hair whilst I was at it. Matt hung his ring gear up and I was shocked to see one of Jeff's old shirts. I asked Matt if he was wrestling in Jeff's shirt. He told me he had brought it for me to wear if I wanted to. I carefully pulled on Jeff's basketball shirt and asked Matt what it looked like. He told me I looked great, suddenly Matt was called into a meeting with Vince. I was sat in the locker room playing with Jeff when there was a knock on the door. Andrew walked in and asked me how I was feeling. I told him I was a bit nervous but I'd be ok. We sat talking and catching up before Matt came back. He wished Matt luck in his match and told me he'd see me later. Matt's first match back was against Chris Jericho. He had gone over the match with Chris a couple of times and he was ready to go. There match was third.
Before we went out I went to find Andrew. He was sat in the snack area talking to some of the other boys. Terri and Trish were in there as well. I asked him if he'd mind watching Jeff whilst I was out in the ring. Andrew stood up and told me it'd be no problem. I handed him Jeff and told him to wish me luck.
I stood in the back area with Matt waiting for his music to hit. Suddenly I heard the first beats and listened as the crowd started to go wild. Matt grabbed my hand and we both ran out onto the stage. Matt did his old pose whilst I watched him, then we both ran down to the ring. I was happy to just stand at ringside but Matt pulled me in with him. He grabbed a microphone and waited for the crowd to calm down. When they finally calmed down he started to speak. "Now for those who don't remember me, I'm Matt Hardy. I was one third of Team Xtreme but now I'm just me. I haven't been here for about nine months but now I'm back. Tonight I'm here to let everyone know that even though I've lost Amy and Jeff, I'm not out of it. This lady with me was Jeff's fiancée when he was killed. Now I know she's not used to being in front of the camera. She spends all her time behind them. It's been almost ten months to the day since we both loved the people we love most in this world. When my brother died I thought that I would never have anything to remind me of him, but a month ago I became an uncle. Tara had Jeff's son and he's the spitting image of my baby brother. Tonight's for you Jeff, I miss you brother. Amy everything I do is for you, I love you baby and I'll make you proud." With that he dropped the microphone and waited for Jericho to come out. I hugged him and told him he did well. I wished him luck before climbing out of the ring. Jericho had a microphone in hand as usual. "Now normally I come out and insult the moron I'm gonna wrestle but tonight is different. Matt you're making your brother and girl proud and everyone's proud of you. Welcome back sonny." Jericho dropped the microphone and jumped into the ring. The match wasn't about winning it was about putting on the best show of their skills for everyone. Matt shocked the audience by not only performing a perfect Moonsault, for Amy, but he also perfected a Swanton Dive, for Jeff, to win the match. He looked up to the ceiling and whispered 'I miss you guys. I'm gonna do you proud.' He looked down at me and whispered 'Team Xtreme forever.' He jumped out and hugged me tightly. We both walked backstage where we were greeted by a huge round of applause. I was just looking for Andrew when I was cornered by Joanie Laurer. She told me that she was glad to see me back and looking better than when we had last seen each other. I thanked her and asked her if she'd seen Andrew. She told me that he was in the snack area playing with Jeff. I said goodbye to her and walked to the snack area. I looked through the doorway and watched Andrew doting over Jeff. He was talking to him and showing him off to everyone. I walked in and asked him if he was having fun. Jeff had a huge grin on his face and was laughing. Andrew told me that he was showing Jeff the match and he thought it was funny. I thanked Andrew and kissed him on the cheek. I took Jeff from him so he could go out for his match. I wished him luck before going back to Mat's locker room. I was just about to open the door when Andrew came running back, I asked him why he wasn't in the ring. Andrew told me he was going he just wanted to see if I'd like to have dinner with him after the show, just as friends. I told him I'd love to be for he ran out to the ring. Matt was laid on the sofa when I walked back in. He jumped up and hugged me. And told me I was great. I told him that it was only because he was there as well. I placed Jeff in his carry cot and got changed. Matt changed as well and asked me if I wanted to go out to celebrate. I told him I'd love to but I had already promised to go and have dinner with Andrew. Matt looked a bit hurt at first but then he told me that it was fine and we could go out for breakfast. I told him that I'd love to.
I dropped Matt off at his house before dropping Jeff off at Marisa's. I quickly got changed and waited for Andrew. We went to a small restaurant just out of town. It was a gorgeous meal and I had loads of fun with Andrew. On the drive home we talked about Music that we liked. Andrew put on Creed's new album and I told him I loved this band. I told him how I used to curl up with Jeff and listen to them whenever we were together. Andrew asked me if I missed Jeff. I told him that I'd always miss him but it was getting easier, especially now I had my son. When we arrived back to my home I invited Andrew in. He told me that he needed to go back to the hotel because it was getting late. Andrew told me that normally he'd kiss the person he went out to dinner with goodnight, but he didn't want to ruin our friendship, and he knew I was still getting over Jeff so he was just gonna say goodnight. I hugged him and thanked him for a great night. I watched as he started to walk down to his car. Suddenly I realized that I needed this. I ran after Andrew and turned him around. Before he could say anything I reached up on my tiptoes and gently kissed him. He was shocked and I told him that it had been ten months and I had to move on for Jeff's sake. Andrew pulled me closer and kissed me again. When we broke apart he told me he'd call me in the morning. I watched as he drove away before I went back inside. Marissa and Shane were looking after Jeff for the night so I had the house to myself. I sat in my living room and put on my Creed album. I closed my eyes and started to fall asleep. The next thing I knew I was in a hall. 'With Arms Wide Open' was playing and I was the only person in the room until Jeff appeared behind me. He took me into his arms and we started to dance. He held me tightly in his arms as the song played. He asked me if I was happy. I thought for a moment and told him that I was. He said he was happy I was happy. I asked him if he was upset I kissed Andrew, he told me that if Andrew made me happy then he wasn't upset. We danced for ages in each others arms. Before he disappeared Jeff told me to break it to Matt gently because he was fragile. I promised I wouldn't hurt him.
When I woke up the next morning I felt happy for the first time since my son was born. I called Shane and told him that I was coming over for Jeff if it was ok.
I picked Jeff up and went to get Matt. We went to a small café for breakfast. Matt asked me how my dinner had gone. I told him it was fine and I had fun. I asked Matt what he thought of Andrew. Matt told me he was a great friend and he was supportive. I asked him what he would think if I went out with Andrew again. Matt looked a bit hurt and asked me if I liked Andrew. I told him I wasn't sure, I just wanted to find out. He told me that if there was a chance I could be happy with Andrew then I should go for it. I hugged him and told him he was great. Matt told me that he was gonna walk home from the café because he needed to go and see someone. I told him that I'd call him later to talk.
When I got home there was a message from Andrew telling me he hadn't been able to stop thinking about me and last night and he wanted to see me again. I had to be at the office in half an hour so I quickly called him back and told him that he could come and see me at the office.
I got changed and grabbed all of my notes for work. Our latest video was one of Chyna and her career with the WWF. It featured her with Triple H and without him. The end of the video was scheduled to show her and Triple H reuniting in one months time. I sorted through all of the material I had T THE OFFICE. We were half way through the pre-production and I had a group out on sabbatical choosing different locations. We wanted it to be different and unique. The locations had to show a bit about the person. I was just going over my final proposal when Andrew arrived. He sat opposite me and asked me how I was doing. I told him I was fine. I stood up and told him it felt too formal sat at my desk. We sat down on the sofa and talked. I told Andrew about my dream. He asked me if I was sure this was what I wanted. I lent closer and kissed him. He took that as a yes and kissed me back. We decided to take things slow until I felt ready. I asked Andrew if we could keep it quiet for a while until we were definite about our feelings. He promised he would. He asked me if I'd told Matt. I said I had and he said he was happy. I didn't tell Andrew that I knew I had hurt Matt because I didn't want to worry him. Andrew had to leave not long after because he had to go and see Vince. He kissed me goodbye and said he'd call that night.
About five minutes after Andrew had left Shane came in, we had a problem. Matt had called him about ten minutes ago and told him it was too hard to be here and he was leaving again. I grabbed my car keys and told Shane that I was gonna stop him. I ran out of the office and got into my car. I raced over to Matt's and ran into the house. At first I thought I was too late but then I found him in the back yard. I got angry when I saw him and demanded to know what he thought he was doing. He told me he couldn't do it and he had to leave, this time he wasn't coming back. I grabbed hold of his arm and asked him why he had promised he would stay when he knew he was gonna leave. He told me that he thought he would stay but now he knew he couldn't. I told him that he was talking bull, he couldn't change his mind in the space of a few hours. Suddenly it hit me, I asked him if it was because I was seeing Andrew. He tried to tell me that it wasn't that but I knew him as well as I knew Jeff, I could tell he was lying. I asked him why he was bothered when he had told me clearly hundred's of times that we could only be friends. Matt was silent which made me really angry. I asked him again why it bothered him. He was starting to really piss me off. I couldn't help crying, I was so mad that he made me cry. He tried to hug me but I pushed him away. I sat down and asked him why he was doing this. Matt crouched in front of me and told me that he was sorry. He cared for me and he didn't want me to get hurt. I pushed him away and told him he couldn't care for me if he was running away again. He stood up and pulled me into his arms. He crushed his lips against mine for what seemed like forever, when we broke apart we were both breathing heavily. He told me that he had to leave because he cared for me too much and he couldn't stand the thought of seeing me with Andrew. I was shocked and just stood there dumbfounded. I realized that he was leaving so I grabbed his arm. I pulled him back towards me and kissed him. I had to know if I felt anything for him. There it was the feeling of fireworks on 5th July. I asked him to give me some time before he left because I had to think some things over. He told me that he would give me a week but then he was gone. I walked away from him and drove back to the office in shock. I went straight into my office and shut my door.
I was in there for two hours not talking to anyone just thinking. I didn't hear the knock on the door until Joanie walked in and sat before me. It took me a moment to realize she was there. She asked me if I was alright because I looked as though I was a million miles away. I told her I was fine just thinking. I started to go over the video concept with her when I suddenly stopped. I looked up and asked her if she had ever had to choose between two people. "When Paul and I first broke up I started dating a guy who worked for us. He was a good friend and I started to like him more. He was there for me after Paul left and really helped me through. I was seeing him for just over a month when I received a phone call from Paul. I went over to his and we got talking. He told me that he had made a mistake and he was madly in love with me and didn't want to lose me again. I loved Paul but I had feelings for the other guy. I must have spent a week just thinking, in the end I chose Paul and I was happy, until we broke up again. Why who've you got to choose between?" I didn't want to tell her at first but I eventually told her. "I went out to dinner with Andrew last night and we kissed. He came to see me again this morning and we decided to take things slow and see how we felt for each other. He helped me after Matt left me and he's a really good friend. But about three hours ago Shane told me that Matt was leaving again. I went over to ask him why and he told me it was because he had too many feelings to watch me with Andrew. He kissed me and it confused me. Matt was like my Rock after Amy and Jeff died. I started to fall in love with him a couple of months ago but then he ran away. When he came back I started to get the feeling in my stomach again. I needed to see how I felt for him so I kissed him, I felt fireworks and everything. The only problem now is I'm so confused on who to choose." Joanie told me to just follow my heart, that's what she did. I thanked her before we got back to going over her video.
I was just packing up my things when Shane came in. He asked me if I'd managed to catch Matt. I told him that he had given me a week to convince him to stay. Shane asked me what I had to convince him of. I told him that I couldn't explain yet, he'd have to wait until I'd chosen.
Six nights later Andrew came round to see me. He was on injury leave for a couple of weeks because his left elbow was playing up. We were sat watching a film. I was still confused and trying to sort out my feelings. I didn't notice Andrew stop the video until I felt him take me hand. I tried to smile at him but I couldn't. He wanted to know what was wrong. I was silent for a moment before taking a deep breath and telling him everything. He asked me what I felt when I kissed him. I had to be honest. I felt friendship and warmth, but no fireworks. Andrew told me that he was still my friend more than anything else and he wanted me to be happy. If I chose Matt then he'd be happy because he knew how much I cared for Matt. I hugged Andrew and thanked him for being so understanding. He pulled me into a huge bear hug and told me that he would always be my friend and he'd always be here for me. I looked up at him and told him that he was like my big brother, he was always protecting me. He hugged me again and told me he'd rather be like my best friend because then he wouldn't feel weird hugging me. I reached up on tip toes and gently kissed his lips before moving out of his embrace. Andrew told me to go and find Matt and tell him how I feel. I started to walk out but then I turned around. I asked Andrew if he was sure, he told me he was positive, and besides it was a bit weird kissing his best friend. I ran back into his arms and thanked him again. He threw me my car keys and told me he'd look after Jeff for me. I ran out and jumped into the car. It started to rain and I couldn't help remembering the night of the crash. I put a tape in my player and listened to the same Creed album that had been playing that night. I tried to push the memory of the crash out of my mind but it kept on coming. I had to replay the impact and watching Jeff die right next to me. Thankfully I pulled up to Matt's house. There were no lights on and his car was missing from the driveway. I ran round to the back hoping that he'd be there. I found a note to me on his back porch. I picked it up and ran back to my car. I unfolded it and started to read.
Tara
I gave you a week to make your decision and since I haven't heard from you I guess you chose Andrew. I've faxed a note to Shane telling him I'm going home. I hope Andrew makes you happy and I wish you all the best.
I will be at home until I decide what to do with my life. Take care of my nephew and make sure he learns all about his Aunt and Uncle, please. I'll always love you but you've moved on.
Love Matthew Moore Hardy…
I put the letter down and switched on my engine. I put my foot down and sped off to the airport. I ignored the rain and just concentrated on getting there.
Have you ever seen those movies when someone is running though the airport trying to catch a loved one, but they miss them by seconds.
I got stuck in a traffic jam on the way and I was really starting to get scared that I'd miss him. As soon as I got away from the traffic I sped up and pulled into the airport. I jumped out of my car and ran inside. I quickly scanned the departures and found the gate for the North Carolina flight. I got to the gate as it was being closed. I begged them to le me through but they wouldn't. I stood at the window and watched as Matt took off in the plane.
Now in the movies when the person turns round, their loved one is stood behind them. When I turned around all I saw were hundreds of strangers. I sadly walked back to my car and drove home.
Andrew was waiting expectantly for me. I collapsed into his arms in tears. I told him that I had missed him and now I had lost him for good, just like Jeff. Andrew held me until I fell asleep.
When I woke up I was laid in my bed. Andrew was downstairs feeding Jeff. I sat down and quietly sipped my coffee.
Andrew asked me if I was going into work. I told him I had to or else I'd miss my deadline.
I thanked him for staying before I packed up Jeff and left for work. Shane was waiting in my office when I got there. He wanted to know how I could let Matt go. He seemed really angry and I just broke down in tears again. Shane was immediately at my side and apologizing saying he wasn't really angry. I eventually managed to tell him everything that had been happening. He told me he was sorry and asked if there was anything he could do. I asked him to let me transfer onto the logistics team so I could check out a couple of locations in North Caroline. Unfortunately I couldn't get out until next month.
I eventually managed to get to Cameron a month later, just in time for the one year anniversary of the accident. It had been one year since me sweetheart Jeff had last kissed me and held me in his arms. It was one year since we had last made love. I took some flowers down to the graveyard and placed them on the graves. I sat in front of Jeff's with his son in my arms. I sat there and told Jeff Jnr all about his dad and Aunt. I sensed someone behind me but when I turned around there was no one there.
I must have been in the graveyard for about two hours just talking to Jeff Jnr about his dad. I got back into my jeep and drove over to Gilberts. As soon as he set eyes on his grandson tears started to from. He couldn't believe how much like his son Jeff looked. I handed Jeff to his granddad whilst I went to get us a drink. We sat on the back porch talking. I asked Gilbert if he'd seen Matt. He told me that he had only stayed in two for a week before packing everything up and going off somewhere. This time it was for good because he had put his house up for sale as well. I still kept Jeff's house so I would have somewhere to stay when I visited.
That night I asked Gilbert to look after Jeff whilst I went for a drive to clear my head. I got into my jeep and started driving. I ended up back at the crash site. A year ago this was where my true love's heart had taken it's last beat. Where one of my best friends had broken his brothers heart, and where I had lost almost everything. I felt as though I had lost all three people that were in that car with me. I gently a red rose for Amy, and a purple rose for Jeff. I asked them to look after Matt and keep him safe because I couldn't. I asked Jeff to look out for our son and me and keep us safe now we were alone. I slowly got back into the jeep and drove back to Gilberts.
I went back home with Jeff that morning. It was a three day drive and I was happy to be home.
It's been nine months since I last heard from Matt. When I got home there was a letter from him telling me that he was leaving Cameron to start a new life. Since then I had released Chyna's video and completed one on Test. Without Matt though, I didn't feel like doing anything. I had all these plans for videos I could do on Matt and his journey back to the top, but he was gone. A couple of months later Andrew introduced me to his new girlfriend. Trish had been a good friend of both of ours and Andrew had found himself falling in love with her. Trish had always loved Andrew and she was happy that he felt the same. They were great together and really happy.
It was Jeff's 1st birthday. I had a small party for him. Shane and Marissa came with Christine. Adam and Jason came. Shannon and Shane brought him a cuddly teddy bear. Andrew and Trish arrived. Andrew handed me Jeff's gift. When we opened it I was almost in tears. It was six small bears. They were different wrestlers. There was Jeff, Matt, Lita, Test, Edge and Christian. I hugged them both and thanked them. I showed them to Jeff and he immediately grabbed the one of his Dad and refused to let go.
We were inside talking when the first crack of thunder hit. I watched as the rain started to pour down. I stood up and walked to the window. I thought I saw someone but decided it was only my imagination. I wished Matt was here with me, because then Jeff's birthday would be complete. The doorbell rang knocking me out of my reverie. I opened it to find only a small box. I brought it inside and placed it on the floor. Jeff crawled over and sat in my lap. He helped me to open the box. I was in shock when I opened it to find a gorgeous hand crafted frame with a photo of me, Jeff, Amy, Matt, Andrew, Adam, Jason, Joanie, Paul and Shane in it. I turned it over and found a note attached. It said simply 'Wish my nephew a happy birthday and tell him I miss you both.' I quickly handed Jeff over to Jason and jumped up. I ran out of the door into the pouring rain. I looked around but I couldn't see anyone. I was just about to walk into the house when I heard someone. "I saw you that day at the airport." I spun around to see Matt stood there soaking wet. "I was sat on the plane and I saw you looking out of the window. I thought you were coming to say goodbye. I saw you again on the anniversary. I watched you as you sat in the graveyard. I wanted to go up to you and take you in my arms but I couldn't. Two weeks ago I read an interview with you in RAW magazine. I never realized how much I hurt you until then. I knew I had to come back for you and my nephew." I ran into his arms and kissed him. He pulled me closer and kissed me back. We just stood there for ages when we finally broke apart. Matt smiled at me and told me he loved me. I whispered that I loved him as well. Suddenly we heard clapping from the doorway. We slowly turned around to see everyone stood there.
Whilst we were sat in the house Matt asked Shane if he could come back. Shane made him promise that he wouldn't leave again. Matt took hold of my hand and pulled me into his lap, he looked into my eyes and told me that he didn't need to leave because he had found his heart and he was back. Everyone cheered but me and Matt, we were too busy kissing. Shane cleared his throat and told us to get a room.
About an hour later everyone started to leave. They all congratulated us and told us to have fun.
That night Matt stayed with me. We talked more about what happened between us and decided that we loved each other to waste however long we had left. Matt kissed me again and picked me up into his arms. He carried me upstairs and laid me on the bed. He looked into my eyes asking if I was sure. I pulled him closer and kissed him passionately.
EPILOGUE
It's been four years since that night. Matt never left me again. So we could spend more time together I took back my job of co-producer. I get to travel with my family now. A year ago I married Matt. We had a small ceremony down in Cameron, only friends and family. We own a house in Cameron, even though I still own Jeff's. We also brought a small Condo down in Tampa, Florida. Andrew and Trish have one about five minutes down the road from us. It's a great vacation spot. Six months ago we found out we would be having our first child together. Jeff's all excited about getting a baby brother or sister. We've decided that if we have a girl we're gonna call her Amy Christine Hardy, after our dear friend. If it's a boy it's gonna be Andrew Matthew Shane Hardy, after our friends and the love of my life.
Tonight we were both curled up in bed talking softly. I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew I heard a storm start up. I slowly climbed out of bed and grabbed a blanket. I wrapped it round my shoulders and walked out to the balcony.
The thunder rolls by. Rain beats on the window and lightning flashes. My heart starts to beat louder as the storm gets closer. I pull my blanket tighter around my shoulders. I've always been petrified of storms. When I was younger they always scared me. As I got older my fear of them started to disappear. But then the accident happened. Suddenly I felt a warm arm around my shoulders. It's only then that I remember I'm not alone. I look up into my husbands worried face. He asks me what I'm thinking about. I tell him it's just old memories. He sits down next to me and pulls me into his arms. We both sit there and remember how our lives changed forever.
Watching the storm in Matt's arms made me think back to the song Jeff played for me over the radio about six years earlier. It described how I felt now.
I was in a tunnelAnd couldn't see the light
And whenever I'd look up
I couldn't see the sky
Sometimes when I'm standin'
It seems like I done walked for miles
And my heart must be cryin'
Dead in the middle of a smile.
But then I climbed the hills
And saw the mountains
I hollered help 'cause
I was lost
Then I felt the strong wind
Heard a small voice sayin'
The storm is over
The storm is over now
And I can see the sunshine
Somewhere beyond the clouds
I can feel heaven yeah
Heaven is over me
Come and set me free.
Now in the midst of my battle
All hope was gone
Downtown in a rushed crowd
And felt all alone
And every now and then
I felt like I would lose my mind
I've been racin' for years
And still no finish line.
But then I climbed the hills
And saw the mountains
I hollered help 'cause
I was lost
Then I felt the strong wind
Heard a small voice sayin'
The storm is over
The storm is over now
And I can see the sunshine
Somewhere beyond the clouds
I can feel heaven yeah
Heaven is over me
Come and set me free.
Somehow my beginning
Stepped right in
Then faith became my friend
And now I can depend
On the voices of the wind
When it's sayin'
Sayin'
The storm is over
The storm is over now
And I can see the sunshine
Somewhere beyond the clouds
I can feel heaven yeah
Heaven is over me
Won't you come and set me from
Won't you set me free.
The storm is over
The storm is over now
And I can see the sunshine
Somewhere beyond the clouds
I can feel heaven yeah
Heaven is over me
Won't you come and set me free
Won't you come and set me free
Hey looks like
Looks like I can see the light shinin'
Somewhere beyond the clouds
Look like I can see the light shinin' down
Down on me.
THE END