The globe span violently as she smashed her hand against it, spinning on its axis, continents blurring, sea's spinning, metal creaking. The screeches of metal on metal making her teeth ache.
Books lay strewn across the floor, by the small table by the left of her bed, useless in face of the current predicament. Pointless when faced with the king size reality check, that had been the last thirty minutes.
Picking up the last reminder of the hurt that ran through her veins, she picked up the small silver picture frame and threw it with all her might against the poster-covered wall that was Lavender Brown's bed.The glass smashed and the silver buckled, the small moving picture floating down and landing in the centre of the circular room.She stared at the shards of glass that littered Lavender's bed. Glittering against the scarlet bed sheets.
Her wand lay discarded; she did not need it here.
Well not right now at least.She wanted to break stuff; she wanted to destroy everything she could lay her hands on, anything to stop the burning hurt that raged in her chest at the thought of the sight that had met her down in the common room.
She suppressed the urge to look up violent jinxes in the many books that she would normally find comfort in.She would not let him get to her like this; she would not let him make her cry.
The curious looks that had followed her across the fire lit common room had burned her skin, people wanting to know what had happened, Harry following her silently.
She wondered if Harry was still down there, waiting for her return, waiting for the eventual fight that this was going to lead too.
Tonight he would have to wait; if she faced him tonight, she would not be responsible for her actions.
She kicked the table hard, she cursed as Crookshanks shot out from his hiding place, turning his bottle brush tail to her angrily as he stalked off downwards to the fifth years dormitories and no doubt in search of Arnold.
"Stupid, ugly, ginger-"
"Who could you possibly be talking about?" Hermione made a point of reaching out and stopping the spinning globe.
She did not turn; she knew that Ginny would have the same pitying look that Harry had worn.She did not want sympathy, she just wanted to search down Ron and hurt him.She heard Ginny walk across to Lavenders bed and clean up the broken glass. The tinkling sound as it hit the metal bin was the only one in the quite room.
She glared at the globe, her hand lay across Europe, and her finger traced Bulgaria.
Maybe she could just run away, start a new life in Bulgaria, and never have to see the cause of this infeasible pain.She felt betrayed, it was as if a much cherished pet had suddenly rounded on her biting her when she least expected it.
"Are you ok?" Ginny asked.
Hermione felt Ginny's hand on her shoulder; she turned slightly and looked n to the face of the worried looking red head.She was still dressed in her quidditch robes, hair still looking slightly windswept from the match.
"Ginny I-" Hermione could not finish the sentence; words had for once escaped her.
Hermione found herself pushed down on to the bed with Ginny passing her handkerchiefs from the bedside table of Pravati.
"I can go kick him for you…really, really hard …" Ginny made an over the top gesture with her foot and momentarily lost balance on the bed, Hermione looked down at her friend and laughed.
"That's better." said Ginny from her sprawled out position on Hermione's bed. "You really shouldn't get yourself upset, especially not over little Ronikins."
"I know it's just-" Hermione started but Ginny cut her off.
"He caught you by surprise. I told you all of my brothers are brainless morons."
Hermione sighed; maybe it was all just her over reacting. However, Ginny did not realise how much Lavender actually liked Ron. How many times had she lay here in this very bed listening to Lavender go on about how fantastic Ron was, secretly agreeing as she talked about the way that he looked in his quidditch robes, wondering out loud what it would be like to kiss him.Minor observations Hermione thoroughly agreed with, but still would hang back from joining in the conversation.
Hermione still remembered the first day back from the holidays as she had unpacked her trunk, Lavender wandering over and asking about how the summer had been.
Hermione had known fine well she wanted to know about what had happened between her and Ron.
Although Hermione had wondered the same thing a million times, all the time's she had caught him staring at her absentmindedly with a content look upon his freckled face.Hermione had told Lavender that it was none of her business, Ron was her best friend and what they did together was between the two of them.
"So you are just friends then?" Lavender had asked, her voice oozing with sweetness.
"As far as I know yes." Hermione had said making a point of placing the silver photo frame with the picture of her and Ron in the garden of the burrow delicately beside the large globe on her bedside table.
Lavender had given it a dismissive look. Then looked back to Hermione.
"Then is it ok if…"
"Lavender if you fancy my best mate then just tell him, I'm sure he would enjoy the ego boost."
Lavender had gone red.
"I don't want to you know…I mean I know you like him." Hermione paused with her book halfway to the shelf.
"What do you mean?"
"It's really obvious…and I don't blame you I mean Ron is, for lack of a better word hot…" Lavender had gone a little red in the face.
"Oh please once you've seen him at three am, with bed hair and in pyjamas that don't fit, you might think again."
Lavender looked at her. "And when did you see this?"
Hermione rolled her eyes.
"I've spent the last two summers and all of last Christmas with the Harry and Ron, I think between me and Ginny we could put you off the two of them for the rest of your lives."
"So you don't fancy Ron?"
Hermione looked at the book in her hand. A present from the man in question, she knew the untidy dedication inside written in his trademark scrawl of by heart. Yes, ok maybe she did fancy Ron, but only a tiny, little, almost microscopic bit.
"No." Hermione said despite the fact she knew what it would do.
"Well in that case can I-"
"Do whatever you want. You don't need my blessing last time I checked Ron was a free agent." Hermione placed the book down on the shelf.
Lavender understood herself to be dismissed. Hermione made a resolve to stick to Ron like glue until Lavender's unfeasible crush wore off.
And she had stuck to Ron; she had even moved things on, asking him to Slughorn's party.
Not that they had mentioned that at all, not since the day in greenhouse five.
She had not mentioned it to anyone; she could not deal with the' I told you!' That would be emitted from almost every sixth year's mouth.
It wasn't until last night as she had sat in the stands watching Ron flounder yet another easy save and wincing to herself as he crashed in to the post, had the subject come up.
"So I hear you're taking Ron to Slughorn's party." a very board looking Pravati had asked, Lavender having dragged her to the training session yet again.
"Who told you that?"
"Neville. So is it true?"
Hermione nodded, and Lavender snorted.
"Yes?" Hermione had said looking from Pravati to her friend.
"I thought you didn't like Ron?"
Hermione shrugged and turned her eyes back to Ron who waved at her dejected from the goals.
"It depends on what you class as like…"Hermione said quietly.
"You know, when you go on like that you sound like Peeves, stop talking in riddles."
"Lavender, Ron is my best friend. Who else would I invite?"
"Well you could always invite Krum?" said Pravati.
"Victor's really busy at the moment, he's training…and in any case I wanted to go with Ron." Lavender and Pravati exchanged smug looks. "As friends!" Hermione said getting to her feet, the other two following her out of the stands.
"Whatever you say." said Lavender waving to a confused looking Ron, who narrowly managed to dodge a bludger that had been aimed at Dean.
The conversation had lasted well in to the night, only stopping when Ron and the others returned from practice, Ginny storming in dragging Dean by the hand followed shortly by a dazed looking Harry and a viciously angry Ron who nearly bit her head off.
As the conversation had moved up stairs to the dormitory, the same question kept rearing its ugly head, when do you stop being friends and become more than that. In addition, for once Hermione had joined in the conversation.When she finally fell asleep in the early hour's her mind was resolved, she would do it tomorrow, if she didn't someone else would, Lavender was right, Ron was way to attractive for his own good, and soon he was bound to notice and if he did, what would make him want plain old boring bookworm Hermione?
Ginny picked up the picture from the floor.
"You know it's not as if it's the end of the world! I mean you can still be friends." but Ginny knew it was a fruitless attempt. She could see it in the red head's eyes. This would be the death to any relationship that Hermione and Ron had.
"He knows exactly what he's doing, it was his choice." Hermione said in a shallow deadpan voice.
There was a quiet knock on the door and Pravati came in.
"Are you ok?" she said quietly as she picked up Hermione's discarded books. Placing them neatly on the desk.
"No." Hermione really didn't see the point in lying.
"I thought you would want to know…Ron instigated it." she said looking away from Hermione.
"Thanks." Hermione could feel the burning pain running through her veins now, a vicious searing pain.
She could not be mad at Lavender, this was not her fault, this was all Ron's, or maybe it was hers she should have done something sooner. She had no one to blame but herself.
As she sat there Ginny's arm around her, and Pravati speaking words of disgust at their two best friends behaviour Hermione couldn't help but wonder how things could get any worse.
ach young love you have to adore it right...