Disclaimer: This is a work of fan fiction. The characters, settings, places, and languages used in this work are the property of the Tolkien Estate, Tolkien Enterprises, and possibly New Line Cinema. The author will not receive any money or other remuneration for this work.

Part 4

"What's so funny?" asked the customs agent whose name-badge read 'Galdor'.

"Those aren't Silmarils," said Celeborn, "they're... Well, let's just say they are fairly obvious forgeries."

"Can you prove that?" asked Gelmir, the other agent.

"Try breaking them. If they smash, then they can't possibly be Silmarils."

"What an excellent idea!" said Gelmir, "Why didn't I think of it?" He set a 'Silmaril' on the ground, picked up a large rock and smashed the crystal, which shattered with the impact, leaving only shards of glass and a strand of hair.

"Well done sir!" said Galdor, "Did you know that the penalty for manufacturing a fake Silmaril is sixty thousand years, compared to only thirty thousand for importing one? You've helped us to find enough evidence to keep those two criminals locked away for a very long time!"

"Might there be some kind of reward?" asked Celeborn, "Do you think that your superiors would be grateful enough to grant my grandsons a trial in the near future?"

"I don't know about that," said Gelmir.

"What was their crime?" asked Galdor.

"They've been charged with entering Valinor illegally," said Celeborn.

"Oh dear, that's a very serious offence," said Galdor.

"They aren't guilty," said Celeborn.

"No-one ever admits that they are," said Gelmir, shaking his head sadly.

"It was all a terrible mistake," protested Celeborn.

"It always is, according to the criminals," said Galdor.

"But it was! They drank too much at my farewell party, then fell asleep aboard my ship, and when they woke up we had already docked in Alqualondë."

"It's an original excuse," said Gelmir.

"We'll do what we can to get them a trial," said Galdor, "If they're lucky, and the judge believes their story, they might only be sentenced to one century, but if it's a right-wing judge..."