Loss

Hey everyone Phenix here(ppl also call me Kikki) neways wats up this is my first Naruto story like ever i have only seen a few episodes of Naruto so thats why any one in here might be out of character. So review and I will give you a cookie for your troubles. (Be nice or evil mutant furbies will eat your brains) I'm so pleasant lol.

DISCLAIMER: Its not mine SO SHUT THE HELL UP ALREADY!

After the death of Sasuke Sakura slips into despair, Kakashi brings her back only to lose her and gain something more.

Sakura stood there numb. Sasuke had succeeded in his goal to destroy his brother, but in the process his hatred and rage destroyed not only his brother, but also Sasuke himself.

Her pain was numb, gone now were the tears that were no longer there. She remembered he always used to smile when she was there. His smile was subtle but it was always there, for her and only her. She was frozen and cold as the rain poured down. Tsunade-sama had come to pay her respects earlier. She and many others had also grieved for his death.

Naruto was inconsolable. He had not even eaten the ramen that Hinata had made for him. The gesture was Hinata's attempt at comfort. She had tried everything short of slapping him but Naruto still stared at the wall his eyes ghosts of their former cheerfulness. Ever since he had received news of Sasuke's death.

Naruto at first denied that Sasuke was dead how could a member of Team 7 possibly have been killed. His denial came to an end at the sight of 'her' crying over Sasuke's mangled remains of what would to some still be considered to be a corpse.

Sakura now returned her eyes to the monument. He was now one of the many whose names were upon it. Those whose lives were spent, and then lost serving Konoha. It didn't seem right that he be there, some had even said it aloud. He had died as a result of his own selfish vendetta. Kakashi along with Tsunade-sama silenced all of them who objected to Sasuke receiving this 'honor', they might have threatened them if they didn't shut their mouths Sakura did not know, all she knew was that the rain was there to keep her company and give her comfort.

It was dark when Kakashi came to retrieve her from the cold. She was stiff and her lips were blue. She was no longer standing only kneeling there her head bent staring at the ground no longer able to look upon the monument. Her former Sensei did not ask questions merely picked her up and began the slow trek back to her and Ino's shared apartment. He didn't say a word. He did not think she would hear him even if he did. Her once vibrant and happy green eyes now showed nothing, he vaguely noticed they looked the same as Naruto's own. Cold and shocked with a hint of shattered denial and pain. There was no longer the carefree innocence in those eyes.

'Yes they are exactly like Naruto's.' Kakashi thought as he carried the young female kunoichi.

He then wondered if his own set of mismatched eyes mirrored theirs. He was indeed shocked to find that one of his former students was killed. Though probably his shock and pain were lessened because he was so used to the loss, and the emptiness that followed the death, of a loved one.

He was so lost in his thoughts that he did not realize he had finally reached her and Ino's apartment. He knocked, as well as can be expected from a man who was carrying a 17 year-old emotionally distraught, not to mention catatonic young woman. When Ino opened the door she looked slightly surprised, but not as surprised as she could have been. She had apparently been on her way out. He briefly noted that her eyes also had lost some of their bright and cheerful glow. Sasuke's death had made it clear to many of his classmates and also to his teammates that they were not unbeatable. They were mortal flesh and bone that would one day rejoin with the soil of this earth and go to a world that they would eternally call their home.

"I was just going to look for her I was getting worried." Ino said as she put down her umbrella.

"I found her kneeling in the rain."

Ino's only response was to nod and allow him in. Sakura had not moved since he had removed her from the ground. If he didn't know better he would say she was dead, but the steady rise and fall of her chest said differently as did the occasional blink from her now empty green eyes.

Ino left to fetch a blanket and Kakashi sat down. He now noticed something he had not noticed before in Sakura's eyes. There was only one slight difference between her and Naruto's eyes one still carried the will to live while the other did not. Sakura's eyes had no will left in them. She was a broken shell a work of art that was nearly complete then smashed with a hammer and burned before it was viewed by the world. He had seen it before and had no power to stop what happened to the person who once held those lifeless eyes.

Sakura he refused to let go though. He did not want her to succumb to the pain. Deep down he also knew that he himself could not stand the loss of another student. They were as Naruto once put it one sunny afternoon 'a family'. He had lost his blood family only to gain another. He had lost his best friend only to gain three young people who he could trust unconditionally. He would not allow himself to lose this time he would not fail Sakura.

What did one say to someone who had just lost someone who she considered every bit as important as the air she breathed? How did he comfort the girl who had once called Sasuke 'her hope for the future' though not in as many words? This girl had loved Sasuke unconditionally since the day she met him. He could see that even now that truth shone through the dark abyss. Her love was still there even in death.

Ino returned with a blanket a moment later. She looked worried as she gazed at her friend's prone form. She looked at him and he looked back. She was looking for answers, Ino for probably the first time in her life, was at a loss for words. They stood there looking at each other. Kakashi also noticed that Ino's eyes were red she had been crying. This death had struck them all deeply, but Sakura seemed to suffer most.

"I would like some time to speak to her alone Ino I suggest you go and get yourself a drink or go to Hinata and Naruto's."

Ino nodded she seemed glad to have an excuse to leave. It seemed that Ino was very distraught over the condition of her former rival, and now her best and most trusted friend. There was also Tenten, but Ino seemed to prefer Sakura when it came to keeping her secrets, and also to her emotional concerns safe and away from Konoha's gossip hounds.

Ino looked down at Sakura then left the room. She returned with an umbrella and then left.

Kakashi looked down at the woman before him. He noticed her eyes were now focused on him although unseeing they seemed to look straight at him and not through him.

"Sakura." He whispered his voice was gentle and kind.

Sakura vaguely noted that he seemed to be searching her eyes, the window into her soul. Though the saying was quite common according to Naruto and many others her eyes were truly a 'direct path to her soul'. She watched him stare at her for what seemed like hours, his usual stoic features were the softest they had ever been. Though his mask was in place she could see his mouth set in a grim line. She could not have spoken if she wanted to she felt trapped and the more she struggled against this force that pulled her down the harder it was so she had given up trying. If she didn't know better she would have said he looked like he was about to cry. Kakashi would never cry though he was too strong to let the death of Sasuke affect him so. Then why was he so sad? Why did he look as if he was desperate for something she could not name? Not being able to sort her thoughts well enough to understand she just lay there and waited.

Kakashi knew she was not going to respond. She needed to be shocked out of it somehow. He had an idea but he did not know if it was the best thing to do at this point in time. Sakura would not understand but at least she would no longer wander through her abyss of despair lost as he had once been at the death of his best friend.

'I should at least try this if it doesn't work I at least tried.'

Sakura just lay there staring. Her mind began to race as she saw him move towards her. 'What is he doing?'

Kakashi kneeled beside the couch. He did not know how to approach this, but he needed to show her that she could trust him. So with hesitant fingers he lowered his mask. It felt odd to show her like this when the situation should have been more relaxed not as tense.

Sakura could feel her heart racing as feeling returned to her limbs. 'His mask he took it off, but why? Is it because of me did he take of his mask for me, why would he do that?' Her eyes were wide with shock as she looked upon his face. His skin was flawless his jaw was perfectly shaped as was his nose and his lips looked so soft and were perfect for kissing, his features seemed to fit him perfectly. 'He's beautiful.' She could not believe her eyes. She reached up her hand and touched his cheek with something akin to childlike wonder.

"Kakashi."

She said his name without the honorific. She did not know why, but without the mask it seemed different. This man before her could not be the same man his expression was too open so very human. This handsome man before her could not be her sensei. The same man who read perverted novels during their training sessions, or whenever he was bored. The same sensei that walked with a slouch that would make any chiropractor cringe. This could not be him.

What he did next shocked her beyond reason. He lowered his face to hers and kissed her. She felt paralyzed. His lips were not Sasuke's this couldn't be right. She went to push him away but felt herself drawing him in. She needed this. She needed him now. Kakashi had somehow known what she needed and now he was giving it to her in the form of a gentle and chaste kiss. Which she now returned placing all her pain and sorrow within it, everything for those few moments was bliss the pain was gone all she felt was the comfort he gave and the feel of his kiss.

He felt her respond and he could feel her tears on her face. Somehow it had worked the human comfort she craved and needed now he gave to her. His arms wrapped around her small form while his lips moved with hers. This was what they both needed. As they pulled apart, she clung to him, like a small child, and he held her in his embrace as her eyes bled her pain in the form of the tears upon her beautiful angelic face.

He could feel her body shake as she sobbed. He could hear her anguished cries. She was broken but he held her still. She would maybe always be broken, but he would hold her together and put back the pieces as best he could. He owed her that much. He looked down into her tearstained face. This was what he would live for. This was what he must protect. This small broken woman with green eyes was his meaning in life now. He knew her secret what she had hidden from everyone but Sasuke. He would protect her and her unborn child no matter what the cost.

EPILOGUE

He remembered that day so many years ago, eight if he wanted to be exact. This day was like that one. Rainy days always made him remember her smiling face. She had passed not long after Sasuke. Her death had been caused by her broken heart, and from the complications of childbirth. She only lived long enough to say her son and daughter's names, then her soul passed from this world. He knew that day she was reunited with Sasuke; the sun had never shone so brightly and the heavens had never been so happy on that day when one of their own an angel that had fallen to the earth was welcomed back into the arms of her cherished one. Small footsteps and a little voice interrupted his thoughts. His gaze moved away from the window to the doorway.

"Sasuke and me wanted to know if we could go play with Kikyo Uzumaki today?"

"Well Kira I don't know you two have been causing trouble lately." He said it with a straight face but his voice betrayed his joke.

Two innocent but intelligent green eyes stared up at him and showed their laughter at his 'secret' joke.

"Please I promise not to put Sasuke in mortal danger for another three weeks if you let me go."

He smiled now that was something that would never happen, but he merely nodded his head and the small blue haired and green eyed girl ran off to meet her twin and best friend.

His thoughts returned to Sakura. He still wondered if he had failed her even to this day. The pain she was in during her final hours had broken his heart. With every cry and every push she had stepped closer to death and to Sasuke. She was close to the end when she had voiced her request. The knowledge that she was going to die was clear in her eyes. She asked him to keep her children with him and raise them as his own. His heart for what he hoped was the last time in his life shattered in his chest as he voiced his promise to always protect them. She then smiled at him one last time and one hour and so many cries and screams later and countless tears shed she died the only evidence of her existence lay in two separate cribs in the nursery crying their eyes out almost as if they knew of their mother's passing. He never told her that he had come to love her. He refused to make her feel guilty for leaving this realm to be with Sasuke. He would never do that to her. The many times he wished to hold her and make everything better, how many times had his eyes spoken the truth of the turmoil he was in as he watched this shattered doll live her last months of life. How many silent tears had he cried when he realized the meaning of the word 'daddy' when her children said it for the first time. He could never understand why this world insisted on taking from him so harshly and then reminding him of it every time he saw her childrens faces.

As his thoughts returned to the present he watched two small children race down the street. He smiled maybe his purpose was to allow her too pass without fear, he would always protect them. Those two small children with their father's dark hair, and a pink haired angel's green eyes that were so full of heavenly grace. As he watched them run the pieces of his heart that were so broken began to mend once again. He was not their father by blood but in spirit he knew the bond was there. He knew that every time they thought of him as their father he was being given something back for his loss. He knew she was watching. Her green eyes so full of happiness as he realized what a precious chance he had been given. As he watched them disappear around the corner he felt his heart whole again because he knew no matter how much he had been robbed of in his past these two children with their innocence were in a way more then anything he had ever had before. They were heavens compensation as their mother left this earth instead of just taking they had given back at the moment of their birth. They were their mother's worthwhile sacrifice one she gave her very life for. Her hope is what she had called them. He smiled despite himself as he saw them round the corner with another girl now with them. Their footsteps were now in the house with their laughter joining them. Yes he had truly been given something that he may have never had if it hadn't been for the tragic events that preceded it. He heard a crash and the resounding cry of 'It wasn't me' he rolled his eyes yes he had received more than he bargained for.

-Kikki-