About the "Project A-ko: The Next Generation" Fanfiction Series
by Atana
Project A-ko was a popular Japanese animation film series begun in 1986. It featured a rivalry between two schoolgirls – Eiko Magami (A-ko) and Biko Daitokuji (B-ko) over the friendship of a third student, Shiiko Kotobuki (C-ko). It was a parody of existing anime series of the day. For example, the super-strong A-ko is the daughter of Superman and Wonder Woman. B-ko is a mechanical genius who whips up huge mecha (enormous humanoid machines) overnight. C-ko turns out to be an alien princess.
The last half of the first movie parodied the Captain Harlock anime series. Piloting the alien craft sent to find C-ko is a female version of Harlock, one Captain Napolipolita (pronounced Nap-oh-lee-po-LEE-tah). Unfortunately, she is an alcoholic who surely would have come to a bad end had it not been for the support of Spy D, another Alpha Cygnan soldier who watches over her.
The series ending shows the Captain lying in an alley, her ship and self-confidence destroyed. I decided to sober her up, give her a billionaire husband (her former rival), and a family of amazon daughters. Originally appearing as a graphic novel, my stories include new characters as well as the old -- so dig in and spend some time in my wacky little Project A-Ko universe!
Thanks for visiting and happy reading!
"Project A-ko – The Next Generation" 1 – "Captain's Revenge"
by Atana
Opening scene of Graviton City Girls High School... A-Ko Magami -- the super-strong daughter of Superman and Wonder Woman – and C-ko Kotobuki – her ditzy friend and alien princess – are standing on the lawn of Graviton City High School for Girls.
Caption: "Six months have passed since the alien fleet left
Earth..."
Ako: It was really nice of your mom to let you stay here in
Graviton City until your 21st birthday, C-ko!
Cko: Yeeeaaahhhh! That's five more years from now! I'll
have lots of time to finish school and everything ...Maybe
you can come and visit me...we'll have lots of fun! Ya-ho,
A-ko!
Bko (spying from afar): What are they talking about? They
never include me. I feel so lonely all the time, even when
I'm with my "friends" -- if you can call them that. If I
didn't pay them, they'd leave.
Ine, Ume, Asa: C'mon B-ko...aren't you taking us out to
eat?
Mari: Grunt.
----------
Caption: "Meanwhile, the remnants of the thrice-battered
alien spaceship are being salvaged by the Daitokuji
Corporation to construct a super high-tech office building
in Tokyo."
Shot of Daitokuji mansion.
Hikaru: Finally, I got my hands on that ship!
Bko: Of course, Father, you had to reduce it to a pile of
rubble first.
Hikaru: Don't rub it in, B-ko.
----------
Caption: "Things have gone from bad to worse for the former
residents of the ship (well, for some of them, anyway)..."
Shot of wimpy bespectacled guy, with two enormous but not
unattractive Cygnan soldiers in body armor, arm-in-arm with
him -- he is beaming and cannot believe his luck.
Guy: Sure -- I'd LOVE to show you the city, ladies.
Shot of D driving. Disappointment is evident in her face.
D: All those years of training as a spy and bodyguard...and
all I could get was this lousy truck driver's job.
Shot of Captain on a barstool. She wears an off-the-
shoulder top, a ratty skirt, and a 99-cent pair of rubber
zoris. She also has a black eye and is bruised; someone
obviously mistook her for a punching bag within the past few
days.
Cap: (Slurring her words, spoken only to herself) I won't
last another five years on this rock. Wish I'd just have
gone down with the ship, like a captain is supposed to ----
maybe they forgot to pick us up when the fleet landed.
(Hopeful, downing a shot.) Yes, that's it. Once the fleet
commander notices I'm not on board, she'll turn around and
come back. All I have to do is wait for a rescue.
Shot of bouncer, grabbing her and yanking her off the stool.
Cap: (Indignant) LET ME GO, EARTHLING PIG! DON'T YOU
KNOW WHO I AM?
Bouncer: Sure...commander of the deadbeat brigade! No
money, no booze, weirdo! OUT!
Shot of Captain, missing a shoe and on hands and knees in
the adjoining alley, rubbing her head.
Bouncer: I'll get the cops on you, alien freak!
Cap: Great Mother, I hate this planet.
----------
Caption: "And in TV Land ---"
TV reporter Yukiko Kado speaks into her microphone: The
demolition of the Spaceship Hotel has brought prosperity to
Graviton City business leaders -- I'm interviewing tycoon
Hikaru Daitokuji.
Hikaru, looking smug: Thanks, Yukiko. Since the Spaceship
Hotel went bankrupt, my Daitokuji Gorgeous Hotel has enjoyed a significant increase in business.
Yukiko: I'm sure that you appreciate it.
Hikaru: Yes, I certainly do. In fact, I wanted to send a
thank-you note to Captain Napolalita -- er, Natolika -- uh, Napolitia -- um, Napolipolita --- but Icouldn't decide whether to address it to "Sir" or "Madam!"
Hikaru is convulsed with laughter at his own wit. Since Napolipolita is a parody of a male character and she is a big girl to boot, she is not exactly the picture of delicate femininity!
----------
Shot of the aliens' shabby room. Captain is delivering a
vicious left hook to the television screen, smashing it into
a million shards.
Cap: AARRRGGGGHHHHHHH! I hate that little creep!
D recognizes that Captain is deeply wounded by Hikaru's
remark.
D: Will you just RELAX. (Sigh...that's the third TV this
week.)
----------
Caption: "The next day --"
A-ko and C-ko are studying (e.g., A-ko is studying, C-ko is
coloring in all the "o"s in her English book).
D (entering the room): May I have the honor of speaking to
my Princess?
Cko: Come in, D!
D enters, wearing her very worn spy outfit. She is in
tears: Oh --(sniff)-- your Majesty --(sniff)-- my poor
Captain is very sick.
Cko, not getting it: Why don't you take her to the doctor?
D: We can't afford a long hospital stay! And we can't get
her free care because she doesn't have something called
"Birth Certificate" --(sniff)-- (sob) ---!
Cko: Oh D -- that's SO sad –
Cko's eyes begin to water. A-ko sees what's coming, but is
powerless to stop it.
C-ko's mouth opens to a size roughly equivalent to the Grand Canyon: WAAAAAAHHHHHHH! DON'T CRY D...WE'LL HELP!
D leaves.
Ako: C-ko -- neither one of us have that kind of money.
Don't aliens believe in health insurance?
Cko, clinching it: Well, I know someone who does -- our pal
B-KO!
Ako, wincing: (No -- not her.)
----------
Shot of high school courtyard. B-ko and her entourage are
present. C-ko bounces over.
Cko: Ya-ho, B-ko-san! Can I ask you to help me out with
something?
Bko, delighted to be asked: Anything, C-ko. You can count
on me!
C-ko relates her tale of woe.
Bko (in thought): Sweet unselfish girl. Always thinking of
others. (Speaking) Don't worry, my friend. I'll do it.
B-ko is now silently figuring out the angles. She thinks to
herself.
Bko: Hmmmm -- we're talking some money here. If I can
convince Father that it's in his best interest to help, maybe HE'LL spring for it. But HOW?
----------
B-ko is rifling her father's computer database. Secret passwords and firewalls are no deterrent to her.
BKo: It's a little sneaky -- breaking into Father's computer is child's play for me. Wonder what I can dig up from these alien service records that Father "captured" and had translated?
Shot of Captain's record appears on monitor. The following
information appears:
NAPOLIPOLITA, AYSHEIA LISIA.
Age: 28.
Height: 5'10".
Weight: 140.
Service History: Cadet, Cygnicity Space Academy - age 12.
Fighter pilot, Egota Pallas Athena - age 16.
Assistant Ship Designer, Egota Pallas Athena- age 18.
Assistant Navigator, Egota Pallas Athena - age 19.
Navigator, Egota Pallas Athena- age 21.
Assistant Engineer, Egota Pallas Athena - age 23.
Chief Engineer, Egota Pallas Athena - age 25.
First Officer, Egota Pallas Athena - age 26.
Captain, Egota Pallas Athena - age 27.
Medical:
Laser wounds.
Alcoholism.
Alcoholism.
Alcoholism.
Fall from landing platform.
Alcoholism.
Dependents: (asterisk: Ever hear of shore leave?)
Alia Makita Napolipolita
Alana Atola Napolipolita
Atina Lisia Napolipolita
Arisa Teria Napolipolita
Akana Tuzoia Napolipolita
Bko: Hmmmm -- there's just a possibility here that you MAY
be as smart as I am, Captain... (Light dawns on Marble Head) Ah - HAH! I've got a way to hook dear Father's interest!
----------
Caption: "The next morning --"
Shot of B-ko at breakfast table, gazing at her father over a
bowl of fresh fruit. Actually, she sees only his Japanese
edition of the Wall Street Journal, in which he is deeply
engrossed).
BKo: Oh, Fa-ther.
Hikaru: Hmmmpphhh?
Bko: Did you know that Captain used to be a ship designer
and engineer?
Hikaru: I thought she was dead by now. Anyway, so what?
Bko, slyly: We-l-l-l-l -- your company COULD hire her to
build a ship that travels four times the speed of light.
Hikaru (light dawns on Marble Head): WHAT?
Bko: Of course, you'll have to have her dried out first. I
understand that she's kind of a mess.
Hikaru, exhilarated: That's EASY -- I'm Chairman of the
Board of the Graviton City Hospital -- I'll make THEM pay
for it --! (pause) B-ko -- that's the best idea I've --
er, you've -- ever had --!
Bko, to herself: HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE. I'm SO clever!
----------
Daitokuji in his office, no longer wearing his pajamas but
his tacky business suit with the bolo tie. He is talking on
the phone.
Hikaru: Hello, D? Daitokuji here. When can I come over to
see your Captain?
D (a classic enabler): Uh, sir, she's not seeing visitors.
Hikaru: Come on, D -- just sober her up and I'll be over
around three o'clock. (Phone clicks, breaking the
connection)
D: Sigh!
----------
Captain is passed out face-down on her bed, a nearly-empty
bottle of G'nazian gin still clenched in her fist. D is
anxious about the task at hand.
D: Wake up, my Captain! (to herself) It will take a
miracle to pull this off!
D drags Captain off the bed. She still bears the black eye
and bruises.
D: Come on, you have to get cleaned up! Daitokuji is
coming here -- maybe he can help us!
Cap: (beyond groggy) Am I on the ship?
----------
Caption: "Later that very same day!"
Captain is wearing jeans and a t-shirt. Her Cygnan shades
serve to cover the bruised eye.
Hikaru enters the room bearing a bouquet of cheap flowers.
Hikaru: (gleefully, rubbing it in) Ahhh, my dear Captain.
How GOOD of you to SEE me. I know what a busy schedule you
have, since your hotel went bust and your fleet took off
without you!
Captain tries to keep her shaking hands from slopping her
drink out of its glass.
Cap: I'll demote D for letting this fool in.
Hikaru: (laying it on thick) Why don't you come work for
me? You can design your own ship. I'll pay for it and hire
you the finest Earth scientists money can buy. Of course,
dear Captain, there IS one little catch -- NO BOOZING!
Cap: Oh, great. Terrific. You jerk.
Hikaru: C'mon Captain. This is your LAST CHANCE to return
to your home. (Thinking) Of course, after I grab the patent
rights after the ship is built, I'll dump you like a hot
rock! You can get smashed in your sleazy bars on your
SEVERANCE PAY! HEE HEE HEE! I'm SO clever!
Captain realizes she really has no choice.
Cap: It's a deal, Daitokuji -- but I have a few conditions
of my own. First. I want at least as much money as your
Director of Development. Second. I want complete autonomy
over my team, my budget, and my timetable. Third. I need
one of the ships to fly back to Alpha Cygni, on my own...NO
Earth crew. Fourth. You will stay OUT of my face at all
times. Do you understand? Are we TOGETHER on this?
Hikaru: Agreed. Except no ship for you. It'd cut my
profit by millions, and I intend to make a fortune.
Cap: That one is NOT negotiable. I have my reasons.
(reluctant pause) There's a holograph on the bureau, next
to what's left of the TV. Look at it.
Hikaru, doing so: Yeah, yeah, OK, sure --- (thinking) Is
she deliberately trying to waste my time, or is she just
wasted?
He looks at the image, which is of Captain in better days,
in her uniform. She is seated, surrounded by five little
Cygnan girls with green hair.
The oldest, Alia, wears a cadet's uniform and has one arm
thrown around her mother's neck. Her other arm is engaged
in pushing down on the head of Arisa, Daughter #4, who is
none too pleased about it. Alana, daughter #2, stands
behind Cap's left shoulder. She is a lovely girl with
slanted eyes and closely resembles her dad (but we won't run
into him for quite a few episodes). Daughter #3, Atina, is
at Ma's knee, playing with baby Akana, who is on Cap's lap
and holds a stuffed toy representing some bizarre breed of
multi-limbed animal.
Hikaru: Oh-h-h-h-h-h boy. Are all of these yours?
Cap: No -- I just hired them for the picture. You idiot!
Hikaru: (prying) Uh...no man in the family?
Cap: (aghast) COHABITATE -- WITH MEN? ARE YOU MAD?
Hikaru: Whoops -- sorry!
Cap: I need that ship.
Hikaru, knowing when to back off, agrees reluctantly: You
got it. (Sigh!)
He walks away.
Hikaru: Well, glad we could reach an agreement. It's off
to detox for you -- report to work in two months. (To
himself) It's hell to develop a conscience at MY age...
He exits, feeling magnanimous.
Captain is left alone. Her emotional pain is evident on her
face.
Cap: I'm so scared. I don't think I can do this.
----------
Caption: "B-ko throws a party at the ridiculously opulent
Daitokuji mansion ---"
B-ko looks fetching in a plaid sundress with flower bow, a
coral necklace, and matching headband. She is smiling and
eyeing Keisama, who is walking away from her.
Bko: Help yourselves, everyone! (To herself) I spared no
expense on this little bash -- I can't believe Kei accepted
my invitation!
Kei (who has a crush on C-ko): Where's C-kosan?
Ako (who has a crush on Kei, drooling): Sigh.
BKo: (alone, with her back to the banquet table) Do I tell
him how I feel about him? I DARE me!
She walks over to Kei, who is none too happy to see her as
she distracts him from his primary goal, which is to seek
out airhead C-ko.
Bko: Keisama -- I forgive you for that awful business with
Miss Ayumi. I know our parents put you up to it -- and I'm
NOT sorry that I wrecked the wedding because -- I -- LOVE --
YOU!
Kei (overwhelmed): Oh! (Gathers his composure) I am
terribly sorry, Miss B-ko -- but I must suffer from an
unrequited love for C-ko--- as you must suffer from an
unrequited love for me.
B-ko, furious, delivers a vicious kick, knocking Kei butt
over teakettle into the petunias.
BKo: LIKE HELL I MUST -- FLYING CRESCENT KICK!
Kei: Oof!
Caption: "The evening doesn't go well for B-ko -- "
Mari, dressed in a sweet ruffled party dress with puffed
sleeves, bends over the banquet table, mouth agape,
preparing to make short work of a beautifully-decorated
layer cake. B-ko is clearly annoyed and disgusted.
Bko: GOD, MARI, WHY DON'T YOU JUST SUCK DOWN THE ENTIRE TABLE?
B-ko wanders over to another group of friends.
Bko: C-ko! Oh, C-ko!
Cko (reflecting the intelligence of a sea cucumber, and laughing at nothing): HA HA HA YA-HO! YA-HO! HA YA-HO!
B-ko, becoming increasingly depressed, goes over to Asa,
Ume, and Ine, who are chatting amongst themselves.
Ume: At first I didn't want to come tonight because I have
this big zit—
Ine: BLEAAAHHHHHHH!
Asa: SO GROSS!
B-ko, in tears now, to herself: Ohhhh I can't stand it! My
friends are disgusting pigs, C-ko really is from outer
space, and the man I love is a dork! All the money in the
world won't help when you have no life. (Sob!)
----------
Caption: "Two months pass, and life for Dear old Dad
becomes less boring --"
Hikaru welcomes Captain, placing his hand on her left
shoulder. She is sober but still shaky, wearing an Earth
woman executive's suit, which she hates. Her hair is quite
long but still in the growing-out-shag mode.
Hikaru: How does my new Director of Strategic Planning
feel?
Cap: Don't ask.
(Shot - closeup of her shades, the intelligence is back in
her eyes)
Cap: Although it's amazing, how clearly I can think.
Hikaru: Now -- let's go to work.
----------
Shot of the Board Room at the headquarters of the Daitokuji
Financial Group. Captain is rubbing her hands together and
smiling, trying to hide her fright.
Cap: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF THE DAITOKUJI CORPORATION -- WELCOME TO THE 23RD CENTURY. (To herself) This is only slightly less hazardous than when I fell into that pit of Terran sanddogs on Rigel VII –
Pan around the table. Everyone is lost in his or her own
thoughts.
Director of Development: Will I lose my job?
Director of Finance: How much is this broad costing us?
Executive #1: Why does she sound like a guy?
Executive #2: Isn't she a drunk or something?
Executive #3: She'll have to do something about that green
hair.
Hikaru (delighted): Great opening, kid!
----------
Caption: "In the land of Japanese management, Captain makes
a splash --"
Shot of a frowning Daitokuji being harangued by his Director
of Development, who is ranting.
Director of Development: Sir, she's like the proverbial
bull in a china shop! She intimidates other executives –
(shot of Captain in her executive chair, clearly pissed off,
addressing several colleagues who stare at her in
astonishment: "Disagree if you like, but remember --I blew
away your space station.")
Director of Development (continuing his harangue): -- uses
excessive force –
(shot of Captain slamming the Director of Finance up against
the wall: "MESS WITH MY DEPARTMENT BUDGET AND DIE, YOU LITTLE WORM!"
Director of Development (concluding) -- and she can't
tolerate the technical limitations of Earth.
(shot of Captain in front of a computer, sweat beads flying
off her head, shrieking "MEMORY! I NEED MORE
MEMORY! ARRRGGHHH!").
Hikaru (doing a slow, lethal burn): So -- you think we
should have sent her to charm school. You think that she
isn't a team player. (He explodes, spraying the Director of
Development with spit) YOU FOOL! SHE'S A SOLDIER, NOT A
BUSINESS EXECUTIVE! PLUS -- SHE'LL MAKE ME MORE MONEY IN ONE DAY THAN YOU'LL MAKE IN FIVE YEARS! LAY OFF!
Director of Development (terrified): YIKES!
----------
Caption: "A few weeks later --"
Daitokuji comes up behind Captain, who is staring at her
computer screen.
Hikaru: Do me a favor, Captain? Will you come home with me
tonight?
Cap: EXCUSE ME? (To herself) Cheap S.O.B. could have least
bought me dinner.
Hikaru: Oh, no, no, I want you to meet my daughter. She's
been very depressed and upset lately, and I thought –
Cap (to herself): I already know your daughter. She's a
lunatic. (Aloud) Do I get combat pay?
Hikaru (getting right in her face): IS THAT A JOKE?
Cap (getting right in HIS face): I wish it was -- that kid
is armed to the max!
----------
Shot of the limo heading for the Daitokuji mansion later
that evening.
Mutual thought balloon: Well --THAT could have gone better.
Hikaru: Actually, Captain, I thought you could show her
some of your engineering wizardry, and maybe give her some
advice –
Cap: The only advice she'll want from me is where she can get one of my beam cannons. (To herself) Gee..I guess I won't get dinner...sigh.
----------
They enter the foyer of the mansion, which is magnificent.
Hikaru: Welcome to the Daitokuji mansion, dear Captain!
Captain is awestruck but refuses to show it.
Cap (to herself): Great Mother! The largest living room I
ever saw was the bridge of an Egota! (Aloud, to Hikaru) By
the way -- please call me Aysha.
Hikaru (not to be outdone for a moment): Call ME Hikaru.
They approach the back of a huge sofa. Sitting on it, in a
high state of annoyance, is B-ko.
Hikaru: Ahem. B-ko -- we have a guest.
Cap (to herself): YOO HOO YOU LITTLE BRAT -- MUMMY'S HOME!
Bko (to herself): WHY DID HE DRAG HOME THAT BURNED-OUT
DRUNK?
Hikaru leaves the room, in order to expedite the flow of
conversation between the two females. The fact that one is
a six-foot Amazon and the other is a high-school girl
doesn't seem to bother him.
Hikaru (as if this is unplanned on his part): Well. I'll
just go and see if I have any messages, and let you ladies
talk –
Cap (leaning against the back of the couch, to herself) Oh
goody.
Bko (greatly annoyed, to herself): Father, I could just
KILL you!
Cap: Build any killer death machines lately?
Bko: What's it to you?
Cap (who has already had enough of her attitude): LOOK HERE, MISSY. I'M TRYING TO BE NICE HERE! AND FOR ME,
THAT'S AN EFFORT!
Bko (with both barrels): LOOK HERE LADY -- OR WHATEVER IT
IS THAT YOU ARE -- DON'T GO TO ANY TROUBLE ON MY ACCOUNT! YOU'RE EVEN MORE OBNOXIOUS SOBER!
An obvious standoff. Hikaru is nowhere in sight. Captain
sighs and turns her back on B-ko.
Cap (thinking): I give up! I'll have to tell Daitokuji that this kind of duty isn't in my job description.
Bko (knowing she's made a mistake): Oh, oh.
Cap: B-ko. My daughters would NEVER treat a guest as you
have treated me. Your father forgot to teach you manners!
Bko (under Captain's withering gaze): Ulp. Look -- I was
rude. I'm sorry (sotto voce) and I don't want my father
mad at me...! Did you say you had daughters--? Hmmm-- you must not get to see them much.
Cap: My current orders are that I can't return home unless
I bring our lost Princess. Such is the life of a soldier.
Bko (now sort of intrigued): That's awful. Were you raised
like that?
Cap: No. My mother was the Cygnan commander. She raised
me right on the bridge of her ship. She taught me
everything. When I was twelve, we were attacked and boarded
by Kirlian renegades headed by General Tokuro.
(Memory shot of Commander Alia Napolipolita watching her
monitor, with her daughter behind her command chair. Tokuro
demands that she give up the ship or die.)
Commander Alia: Never.
She lifts the girl and helps her into a duct in the ceiling ventilation, thus saving her life.
Back to the present. Captain is holding her glasses in her
hand, which partly covers her face. Bko stands next to her,
directly under a framed photograph of her father and her
deceased mother.
Cap: I was the only one who survived because I was small
enough to hide. I've missed my mother every day since --
ah, well, that was a long time ago. What sad thoughts I
have tonight!
Bko (in thought): I still miss my mother, too.
----------
Hikaru bounces back into the room and he and Captain head
for the door. B-ko is watching them from the inside
hallway, at a distance.
Hikaru: So, what's bugging my daughter?
Cap: She's lonely, bored, and misses her mother. But THAT
ship took off years ago... you should have had a woman in here. (Giving him a dig for his obvious neglect) But I suspect that even Earth women
would grow tired of your incessant yammering about money after about five minutes –
Hikaru (testy): Yeah -- well -- never mind about that. What about B-ko's obsession with mecha, weapons, and all that destructive stuff she cranks out? I mean, isn't that weird?
He has obviously addressed this question to the wrong
person.
Cap: Oh, leave her alone. ALL my girls carry assault
rifles.
Hikaru (thinking): Yes -- but you're all a bunch of crazy
militaristic Amazons –
Bko (sotto voce, from out in the hallway) Assault rifles!
They could fit into my book bag! What an idea!
----------
Caption: "As construction of the spaceship progresses, only
a select few have knowledge of the top-secret project --"
Shot of a cocktail party. In attendance are Hikaru, Captain
(sober), Shogun Zuma, and Colonel Yashida. Captain is
speaking emphatically.
Cap: My decision was final from the beginning. The only
weaponry on board will be for defensive purposes only. This
is a transport cruiser!
Hikaru (thinking): Oh no -- is she drinking again?
Mr. Director Zuma (head of the Earth Defense Force): ---- ?
Colonel Yashida (thinking, not quite daring to say): Good
for you, Captain –
Mr. Director Zuma (finally getting it): WHAAAAT? DO YOU
MEAN THERE WON'T BE ANY MILITARY APPLICATIONS? HAVE YOU FLIPPED?
Captain (who has definitely NOT flipped) is furious that this little dink dares to challenge her decision. She grabs Zuma by the tie, her biceps bulging, leans over, and shouts in his startled face: DON'T FIGHT ME ON THIS, CUTIE PIE! I'M BIGGER THAN YOU!
Hikaru clearly feels that Captain has overstepped her bounds, and knows that Zuma is secretly terrified of her. He immediately gets right in her face.
Hikaru: WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT THE DECISION IS YOURS, ANYWAY?
Cap (not in the least bit intimidated, and right in HIS face): DON'T TRY TO PUSH ME AROUND, PAL -- YOU DESTROYED MY EGOTA STARCRUISER -- YOU OWE ME PLENTY!
The situation is tense, with Hikaru and Captain nose to
nose, fuming, and no end in sight.
Mr. Director Zuma (quietly, not wanting to irritate his
alien nemesis): There's GOT to be something in this project for ME! (Visions of kickbacks dance in his head, calming him somewhat)
Colonel Yashida (who is rather taken by Captain): Outstanding!
Shot of Captain, her hands clasped over her ears, losing
control.
Cap: I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU GRAVITON BONEHEADS! FOLLOW MY ORDERS OR I GO PEDDLE MY EXPERTISE TO THE AMERICANS!
Shouts of horror: "NO!" "NOT THAT!"
Cap (thinking offhandedly, before her grand exit): Men are
weird the universe over.
She strides out of the room, the mini-cape on her white
catsuit flapping behind her.
Daitokuji, realizing what is at stake here, actually runs
after her.
Hikaru: PLEASE COME BACK!
Cap: Drop dead, Daitokuji -- go listen to your stupid Elvis
recordings.
He slows down and walks behind her. She is appalled at herself, but she begins to cry in front of him.
Hikaru (genuinely concerned): What is it?
Cap (who has taken off her glasses and is wiping her eyes):
What have you done behind my back? Under the Cygnan code,
the penalty for disclosure by an officer of military technology to a foreign nation is execution.
Hikaru is horrified at the ramifications of such an
announcement.
Hikaru (to himself): Oh, no! That was the point of
BUILDING the lousy thing! (Addressing Captain) Look. I
made an executive decision. I planned to sell the ship to
the Earth Defense Force.
Cap (despondent): Then I'm as good as dead.
Hikaru thinks and rubs his lower lip.
Hikaru: Well, this is a mess, Hikaru -- . So what will you
do -- make nearly a billion in military contracts, or continue to try to salvage our alien friend? A crisis of conscience -- I HATE when that happens!
Shot of Hikaru and Cap in a clench. She is smiling. He is
musing.
Hikaru: Oh, what the hell -- so I only make 150 million!
----------
Caption: "Life goes on for the girls at the prestigious
Graviton City Girls High School --"
Shot of Miss Ayumi, wearing her usual dopey expression.
Miss Ayumi: Good morning girls blah blah blah ---
Shot of A-ko, B-ko and C-ko sitting in a row, each in her
respective desk. A-ko is barely capable of containing her
contempt for the weasel sitting to her left.
Ako: STUCK-UP, MANIPULATIVE, WHACKED-OUT TWIT!
Bko (thinking and wearing an expression of distaste beyond
description): EAT FLAMING DEATH, YOU SILLY COW.
C-ko is oblivious to it all. She is thinking happy thoughts
-- like sunshine, and lollipops, and fuzzy slippers, and --
(are you ready to blow lunch?).
Cko: I'm so glad they're friends at last! (In an effort
to include Mari, who is an absolutely immense schoolgirl) Let's all go shopping after school. You too, Mari!
Mari: Grunt.
----------
Shot of boutique featured in Project A-Ko 3 - Cinderella
Rhapsody. The saleslady with the geometric haircut attends
to Mari, A-ko, B-ko, and C-ko. She is trying to be tactful,
which is difficult because Mari stands before her and the
mirror, resplendent in a daisy-print party dress. Unfortunately, the buttons are strained to the point of bursting and Mari has already
popped the seams covering her upper arms.
Saleslady: OOPS! My, my -- looks like you'll want to check
out the shop down the street for big-boned gals.
Mari (thinking): I like the flowers.
Ako (sweating): Help me.
Bko: Mari, maybe you can go shopping there with D --
Cko (clueless): Mari! You look just like a princess, like
ME!
Shot of A-ko in a pretty sleeveless scoop-neck dress. She
is admiring herself in the large oval mirror. B-ko is
looking on, a snotty expression on her puss.
Ako: B-ko -- do you think Kei would like me in this?
Bko (with an evil smile): I don't think Kei would like YOU
if you were wearing the Hope Diamond.
----------
Shot of Central Astro Agency headquarters. Colonel Yashida
and several of his subordinates hover over various screens.
The air is full of tension.
Technician #1: Colonel Yashida, we have a blip on the
screen -- it's heading right in.
Colonel Yashida: Full alert.
Technician #2: Visual sighting by one of our AC1-20
Ospreys. It's some sort of spaceship, but has a different
configuration than the Alpha Cygni vessels -- they think.
Colonel Yashida (brightens, in spite of himself): Hmmm.
Contact the Daitokuji Corporation and see if they can spare
the Captain for a while.
----------
Captain is on the scene, in full command mode. She can't
help herself. She scrutinizes the monitor screen in front of
her and speaks to Yashida.
Captain: I can't believe it -- it's Kirlian. Old enemies
of Alpha Cygni. They must have intercepted the fleet's
transmissions -- (with dawning concern) they're after our
princess!
She walks toward the door.
Cap: I know that ship and that captain. He killed my
mother and her entire crew. (Pause) It's time for me to stop being a coward. I'll take out his craft, and then him.
Mr. Director Zuma has wandered onto the scene, cowering. He
can't believe he's actually about to offer the assistance of the Earth Defense Force to this giant scary alien woman.
Mr. Director Zuma: Do you need backup?
Cap (declining but appreciating it): No thank you. This is
my fight, not that of Earth. But would you have your people
clear me some airspace?
----------
Shot of Captain tearing through the clothes in her closet.
B-ko comes up behind her.
Bko: What are you doing?
Cap: Got to find my old uniform. Call D and tell her the
Princess is in danger.
Bko (horrified): C-Ko's in danger? And you're going to
protect her...? WAIT!
Bko runs out of the room, later returning with an armload of
heavy clothing and accessories.
Bko (psyched): Captain! Wear this Akagiyama 23 Power
Biosuit underneath your uniform...it will give you an edge!
Captain eyes it with serious misgivings.
Cap (to herself): Like -- I could even THINK of cramming
myself into that teenage thing – (speaking to B-ko) Aah -- sure. Thanks --
----------
Shot of Captain in her old Cygnan uniform.
Cap: Well -- it's been a long time. OW OW OW -- THIS LOUSY
BIOSUIT IS KILLING ME!
----------
Shot of the interior of an Earth Defense Force hangar.Shogun Zuma and Colonel Yashida are looking at one of the last remaining Omni "spider" fighters, which Captain intends to fly very shortly.
Colonel Yashida: It's ready to go. What a beautiful craft.
Too bad we Earthlings couldn't figure out how it works!
Cap: Ah, wish me luck. I've never piloted sober in my adult
life.
Mr. Director Zuma (beyond magnanimous at this moment): Good
luck, Captain. We mean that.
----------
Shot of the Omni flying toward a hideous ship, which is
covered with barbs reminiscent of a reptile's skin.
Captain (in cockpit): What an ugly heap of space junk.
Good thing my Omni has a cloaking device. Almost there --
(the target is directly in front of her) Bye bye baby
((BOOM!))
There is a tremendous explosion, noticed on the ground by
Miss Ayumi, who associates any loud noise with fireworks.
Miss Ayumi: Is there a festival today?
Unfortunately, the plasma lines of Captain's ship have been
severed by flying debris. She tries desperately to bail out
before her ship is blown to chopsticks.
((BLAM!))
Captain finds herself hovering magically, some three
thousand feet over the Bay. She watches with amazement as the pieces of both ships falling in the water...ker-plop.
Cap: Huh? I am alive! B-ko's biosuit propelled me
clear ---!
She loops in a double-barrel circle, just for grins.
Cap: This is unbelievably fun! Looks like some sort of commotion at Graviton City Hall. I wonder if that murderer Tokuro transported himself down before the ship blew...
----------
Shot of news announcer: This is Hideo Moriyama, reporting
live from Graviton City Hall, where an alien invader
threatens to detonate major downtown office buildings unless
his demands are met. He insists that C-ko Kotobuki, the
fabled Alpha Cygnan princess, be turned over to him
immediately. City Council members are deadlocked at this
hour –
-----------
Tokuro and his henchmen are holding a group of people under
restraint. Captain, looking rather buff in her nice uniform
and her B-ko jet propulsion "wings", snickers at Tokuro.
Cap: Tokuro, you filthy old sack of spacedung. Why are you
bothering these people?
Tokuro: Ah -- it's Napolipolita, the drunken disgrace of
the Lepton fleet! I wish your dear mother was here to see
just how badly you turned out! We heard you disabled your
own ship!
Cap: And I destroyed yours.
Tokuro: It's much too late for redemption, you skinny,
gravel-voiced, green-headed Cygnan tart! I'll steal your princess with or without that ship. (To his henchmen) Throw me a sword -- I'll cut her up in traditional Kirlian style!
Shot of the two combatants, en garde.
Tokuro: Cheer up, little girl! You won't live long enough
to face a court-martial!
Cap: Sayonara, as they say.
Tokuro's sword cuts through the air that seconds before was
filled by Captain's body. She is about eight feet in the
air, hovering.
Cap: Thank-you, B-ko!
Tokuro: HUNH? None of the Cygnans I've gotten rid of have
THIS kind of strength!
Captain is fully into it now. She whirls the sword over her head because she is a show-off and it feels nice.
Cap: GET OVER HERE! Are you afraid?
---------
Caption: "As the battle rages at City Hall, Director Zuma
gets a surprise --"
Colonel Yashida: Shogun, more extraterrestrial company. An
Egota is requesting our permission to disembark. Granted?
Mr. Director Zuma: I wish they'd let me know they were
coming -- it upsets my stomach when they just drop in!
-----------
Shot of battle scene. Captain is kicking Tokuro, who is astounded.
Cap: YAAAAAAAAA HAAAAAAAAAA! This is GREAT! I LOVE it!
A group of people, including "Colonel Sanders", D, A-ko,
Hikaru, B-ko, and Mari-chan, are watching the action.
D (stricken): MY CAPTAIN!
Hikaru almost, but not quite, comprehends the Cygnan
mystique of cruising hyperspace, having tons of kids, and
blowing away enemies.
Hikaru: WHAT DOES SHE THINK SHE'S DOING NOW?
Yukiko Kado: This is Yukiko Kado, risking life and limb to
bring you live footage of the titanic alien battle being waged over C-ko Kotobuki right here at City Hall –
Tokuro: NOW I'M MAD!
He shatters Captain's sword with his own and knocks her
backwards, where she hits her head on the floor.
Yukiko Kado: Citizens of Graviton City will lose some of
their downtown office buildings if General Tokuro wins.
Mass evacuations continue. (Notices Captain on the ground)
Looks like a knockout punch for the General!
Tokuro (standing over her): Let's end this farce.
Cap (struggling, to herself): Get up, get up, get UP...
Ako: Let's get that creep.
Bko: Right.
Hikaru: Let's rock!
Suddenly, a Cygnan in body armor breaks through the crowd,
shoving him and D aside.
Cygnan: MY TURN!
D: A Lepton cadet! Is the fleet in?
The soldier swings her sword and knocks Tokuro into the air.
Cygnan: Back off, you scumsucking Kirlian pig!
Yukiko Kado: FLASH! A new player on the scene! Graviton
City asks: WHO IS SHE?
The two continue to fight. Captain has the chance to get
back on her feet.
Caption: "Graviton City is saved from certain destruction
with the arrival of the mystery warrior and the defeat of
General Tokuro!"
Crowd cheers wildly.
Cygnan (still swinging): HAD ENOUGH?
Tokuro (lying on the floor, covering his head with his
arms): I surrender! Take me away!
As Captain recovers her bearings, Yukiko Kado sticks her
microphone into her face.
Yukiko Kado: Uh -- Captain ---? Oh, good, you're not dead.
In that case, how about a few words?
Cap (still holding her head in her hands): Sure. Take - a hike - honey.
The Cygnan lifts her blast shield and removes her helmet.
She and Captain embrace. Both begin to cry.
Cap: This brave girl is Daughter #1, Alia Napolipolita.
Yukiko Kado: And there you have it, folks -- Graviton City
was saved today from certain disaster not by our illustrious
Earth Defense Force, but by an alien mother-daughter team!
This concludes our coverage. Thanks for watching!
Captain and Alia are surrounded by their admirers. Alia
seems extremely upset, however.
D: Great job, little one!
Bko (fascinated by the new arrival): Wonder if she'd like
building mechas?
----------
Alia: Ma -- we've got to get out of here -- the Commander's
ship has come to ARREST you!
She pulls her mother away from the crowd, but their escape
is blocked by a phalanx of Cygnan soldiers, headed by Commander Itisia Maldekai, who has apparently waited for some time to make her little speech.
Maldekai: Aysheia Napolipolita. We have orders from the
Military Council to arrest you for gross dereliction of duty
and to return you for trial –
Captain (to Alia): It's too late, baby.
Hikaru Daitokuji, bristling with indignation, muscles his
way through the crowd.
Hikaru: JUST A MINUTE COMMANDER. YOU HAVE NO JURISDICTION HERE. (To himself) I've got quite a few troops in MY back pocket too, sweetheart –
Maldekai (no more threatened by Hikaru than by a fruit fly):
My beam cannons are pointed at Beijing, Tokyo, and Graviton
City. That's all the jurisdiction I need.
Hikaru grabs Captain and pulls her close.
Hikaru: WELL, YOU CAN'T HAVE HER!
Captain appreciates his gallantry, but feels quite capable
of handling this herself, thank you very much.
Cap: (To Hikaru) Shut up, shut up, shut up! They can
always shoot me on sight!
Suddenly, C-ko -- heretofore hidden out of harm's way by D -
- arrives and begins to wail. Her mouth is roughly the size
of Lake Superior, as is her water output.
CKo: BWAAAAAAAAAAH HAAAAH HAAAAAAAAAAA booooOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOO! STOP ALL THE YELLING! AND I HATE GUNS!
The entire Cygnan battalion, including Commander Maldekai,
fall to their knees with a gasp. Here at last is their beloved lost Princess!
CKo (in a huff, and getting a taste of the power she has
over these women): You'd BETTER bow to me, after being so
MEAN!
C-Ko addresses the multitude, in her whiny baby voice.
CKo (all in one breath): GEE, COMMANDER, THE CAPTAIN DIDN'T MEAN TO GET DRUNK AND WRECK THE SPACESHIP! AND SHE DID TRY TO KIDNAP ME A WHOLE BUNCH OF TIMES TO TAKE ME TO ALPHA CYGNI BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO GO, AND, AND, ALL SHE NEEDS TO BE HAPPY HERE IS HER DAUGHTERS AND PROBABLY MR. DAITOKUJI TOO
AND B-KO PROBABLY WOULDN'T MIND HAVING A BIGGER FAMILY AND I DON'T WANT YOU TO TAKE HER AWAY AND DID YOU KNOW THAT SHE DOESN'T DRINK ANY MORE
WHEW!
Maldekai (smiling, happy for the chance to suck up to royalty): If that is your Imperial command, I will be very glad to rescind the order for arrest! However, Captain, may I suggest that you RETIRE (OH PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE)?
CKo (pleased that things are settling down, and that all these big ladies are groveling at her feet): YA-HO!
Captain jumps in Hikaru's arms.
Hikaru: With this crowd, how many more should we expect at
the reception?
Cap: (smooching him) Oh -- about 12,000.
BKo (astonished): FATHER?
Alia (ditto): MOTHER?
Captain disengages herself and kneels before Commander
Maldekai, who places her hand on Captain's head.
Cap: Commander, I have decided to retire and stay here.
Commander Maldekai remembers, and not fondly, Captain as an
out-of-control cadet who was untouchable because her
martyred mother had been the commander.
Maldekai (under her breath, but just barely): Whew! You
always were a handful!
Tokuro is led away by two beefy Cygnan soldiers.
Maldekai: I will happily exchange transportation here of
your children for transportation home of Tokuro.
Cap: We got him.
Shot of the crowd. Cygnan soldiers are commenting "Any cute
guys?" "Nice place!" and "Where are the men?"
Meanwhile, B-ko and Alia have hit it off. B-ko, uncharacteristically, is delighted to have a new friend.
BKo: I don't have any sisters.
Alia: You can have mine.
Captain and D hug.
Cap: I can't believe my luck!
D: Congrats, my Captain!
Hikaru walks with Commander Maldekai, giving her a real snow
job.
Hikaru: By the way, Commander, as long as you people are in
town, I'd like to explore the potential long-term economic
and business possibilities between our two worlds...for
example, how about a joint military effort? I'm sure the Earth
Defense Force ----
Maldekai (to herself): Ooh, aren't YOU the charmer.
-----------
Shot of the Graviton City Sports Arena. It is crammed to
the rafters. The thousands of beautifully-adorned Cygnans
in the audience are making it known to the Earth men that
they would like -- uh, to get to know them better after the
reception. Captain is in her Cygnan uniform; Hikaru is
dressed in a silk kimono.
Cap: Earth's only filled-to-capacity wedding.
Hikaru: Sorry -- I had to rent the arena because we had
those 12,000 Cygnans, then we had to invite at least 12,000
Earth Defense Force male soldiers, then your friends, then
my friends, then business associates, then...
----------
Caption: "Absolutely EVERYONE (Cygnan and Earthling)
attends the wedding reception on the grounds of the
ridiculously opulent Daitokuji (er, Napolipolita-Daitokuji)
mansion ---"
A sea of people extends as far as the eye can see. Some
Cygnans are drinking, some are carousing, all appear ready
to raise a little hell. Everyone else appears to be having
a perfectly marvelous time.
Hikaru: Those Cygnan soldiers are really crazy!
Cap (now wearing a lovely embroidered kimono): They've been
on a ship for six months –
D greets the couple. Captain stands up and waves her hands,
showing off her iridescent green nail polish.
Cap: To celebrate this occasion, I'd like to sing a song I
wrote...
D races over and claps her hand over her mouth. Hikaru
looks puzzled.
D: NO! (To Hikaru): Sorry, sir, but you've never heard
her sing!
Cap (wounded): D HAS NO APPRECIATION FOR FINE MUSIC!
Hikaru (aside): Maybe she does... (Aloud) Never mind --
come see your present!
He takes Captain over to a plot of land behind a large grove
of trees. There, in all its restored splendor, is the temple which provided the place of worship on Captain's late- great Egota.
Cap (elated, waving her arms): MY TEMPLE!
Hikaru (pleased that she is pleased): I had it salvaged
from the wreckage of the Spaceship Hotel, and reassembled
here for you. (And boy, did I ever have to grease palms at
the Zoning Board!)
Shot of the younger set at the reception. Alia and B-ko
both wear traditional long Cygnan dresses and wear
chrysanthemums in their hair.
CKo (playing the big shot, a new experience): Alia, you'll
have to go shopping with us, and to the movies, and you can
buy Earth clothes...
Alia (excited, but a little overwhelmed, to herself): I
can't believe my Princess is talking to ME!
Ine, Asa, Ume, and A-ko smile. C-ko whips out a square luncheon box, filled with the most disgusting and unidentifiable members of the animal and vegetable kingdom that one can imagine. Everyone screams. It is obvious that the Little Lost Princess is a terrible cook.
CKo: And since you're B-Ko's sister now, I made you a
special lunch of EARTH DELICACIES!
Shouts from the crowd of girls include "RUN!" "Don't touch
it!" and "It's lethal to aliens! D almost died!"
Alia: I'd be most honored, my Princess.
Alia is eating the food with chopsticks, and has a grin on
her face. The girls continue to warn her, shouting "She's
still alive!" "Drop it on the floor, NOW!" and "She may be
OK now, but the poisonous effect is cumulative!"
Alia: Ummmm -- this is GOOD! I LIKE it! Is there any
MORE?
CKo: I LOVE YOU!
Fadeout.
----------
Caption: "Our story's happy ending is really just a
beginning."
A-KO:
A-ko is pictured, in a construction worker's clothing and
hoisting a beam. Caption: "A-Ko marries Kei and has two kids, neither of whom seem anything but normal. Runs her own construction company (guaranteeing that a building will go up in five days or less), and because she's the boss, sleeps late every day."
C-KO:
C-Ko is shown with her mom. In her arms is a howling brat
in pigtails who looks (and acts) like both of them. Caption: "C-Ko returns to Alpha Cygni. Marries Prince Sokar of the nearby (only
1/2 light-year) all-male planet of Thessalonika and a daughter every bit as ditzy as she is. Visits Earth occasionally, bringing lunches for everyone, driving Cygnans crazy."
B-KO:
B-Ko sits at her executive-sized desk, with her feet up and the phone in her hand. She absentmindedly examines her nails. On the desk before her is a list of things To Do: "Take over IBM" "Take over Kodak" "Take over Coca-Cola" and "Take over Kentucky Fried Chicken (remember the "Colonel"?). Some wag has also written at the bottom,
"Remember Pearl Harbor!" Caption: "Becomes Japan's premiere woman executive. Expands her dad's empire to the manufacture of mechas, and successfully markets the Captain's light-speed cruiser to
every powerful person or country on Earth."
HIKARU DAITOKUJI:
Hikaru Daitokuji listens to "Love me Tender" and wears his
1976 Elvis suit. He says, "Wonder if I should buy
Argentina?" Caption: "Still heads his empire, but has passed much
responsibility to B-Ko. With the Captain's help, he forged
a commercial and military alliance with the Lepton Kingdom
of Alpha Cygni. Still likes hostile takeovers and Elvis."
CAPTAIN AYSHEIA LISIA NAPOLIPOLITA-DAITOKUJI (whew!):
She is shown on the bridge of one of her light-speed ships
(formally known as the Napolipolita-Daitokuji Silver Edition
Classic Lotus Blossom Special, aka ENDY), with daughters
hanging onto her. Caption: "Finding the cockpit more comfortable than the boardroom, Captain heads the Central Astro Agency, had even more kids (all of whom have an unusual shade of blue-green hair), and manages to stay sober."
HER DAUGHTERS:
Four of her children are posing in their totally stylish Earth clothes. They carry heavy shopping bags. All wear Cygnan shades. Caption: "Alana, Atina, Arisa, and Akana Napolipolita happily come to Earth and are adopted by Hikaru Daitokuji. They attend Graviton City girls' schools and -- being rich -- shop until they drop. Alia is appointed Commander of the Cygnan forces by the Princess because Alia liked her cooking."
SPY "D":
D, her short hair grown out to a pageboy, is seated. Children are
crawling all over her. Two are howling. One is wearing a crash helmet. One sucks her thumb. D thinks, "GREAT MOTHER!" and appears totally overwhelmed. Caption: "Torn between her desire to go home and her loyalty to her Captain, D decided to stay on Earth. She is Chief of Security at the Daitokuji Financial Group but spends a lot
of time babysitting."
B-KO's PALS:
B-Ko's former cronies are shown together. Mari is wearing a gi and appears ready to kick butt. The others appear quite normal, which is nice.
Caption: "Mari owns a florist shop and teaches karate at the Okugi school. Ine heads a cable television station, Ume is a noncommissioned officer in the Earth Defense Force and specializes in covert operations. Asa is on the local school board and works as B-Ko's executive secretary."
THE MILITARY GUYS:
Mr. Director Monty Zuma is depicted wearing a Hawaii-print
shirt, festooned with palm trees. The buttons are ready to pop. Colonel Larry Yashida beams at his new military insignia, proud of his promotion. Caption: "Despite his many foul-ups, Director Zuma finally
retired with his pension benefits intact. He was succeeded by Colonel Yashida, who runs the EDF very happily."
KEI YUKI:
Keisama is combing his hair. The comb holds more hair than
his scalp. His daughter sits on his lap, oblivious to her
dad's personal crisis. Caption: "Married to A-Ko, he runs his father's company but devotes himself to his chain of Harley-Davidson dealerships. He isn't the way-cool dude he used to be since his hairline
started to recede."
AYUMI SENSEI:
Finally, Miss Ayumi is shown lighting a giant firecracker. She says, "Now be sure to cover your ears, girls – this will make a big scary BOOM Tee Hee..." Caption: "Miss Ayumi worked up the ranks and is now principal of Graviton City Girls' High School. She invests
her excess capital in a fireworks company."
THE END
Stay tuned for the next exciting narrated adventure in "Project A-Ko The Next Generation 2: 'Singing the Time Warp Blues' or 'My Babysitter was an Alien.' "Atina, Arisa, and Akana Napolipolita-Daitokuji are rich, spoiled, and bored, bored, bored! When their mother gets them a babysitting job, they really go into orbit -- will A-Ko, C-Ko, and Mari see their little darlings again? How did the dinosaurs die? Did they really smoke all that dope at Woodstock? Why DID Kamikaze pilots wear helmets? Does anyone care?