Disclaimer: I don't own the Justice League, or Batman Beyond, or ANY of the D.C. universe for that matter.

This Ain't the Golden Years

Chapter One

September 22, 2058

My lovely, beautiful (and still incredibly sexy) wife Linda seems to think I need to keep a journal to remember things. I don't know what she's talking about. My memory's the model of perfection. Now if I could only find my cell phone.

I don't know what I did with it. I tried calling it, but no luck. I think it got sucked into some black hole. Either that or the damned cat made off with it. I swear he's evil, he's like one of those kids off The Children of the Corn or something. I can see him now, staring at me with those little black beady eyes.

The cat's name is Obi-wan, oddly. My granddaughter named him. He lives to torment me.

Anyway, as I was saying, my memory's perfect. Now John, he's another story. For an ex-Marine and former Green Lantern, he's sure turned into a crochety old guy. (Although not as bad as Bruce) His memory's not too good either. Just the other day I was telling him how I'm the Fastest Man Alive and you know what he did?

He laughed at me! It seems that apparently my daughter and grandkids are faster. (That may be John, but I said MAN, not woman and children!) Oh and Linda seems to think that I need to write a memoir or something. How boring is that? Apparently I'm supposed to record all the noteworthy things that have happened in my life. Hmmm...

I think I'll procrastinate and start tomorrow.

Oh yeah, Linda and I are going to Metropolis on Tuesday to meet the new kids at the Justice League. I've already met Rex Stewart, I spoiled him rotten as a kid. When John and Shayera weren't looking of course. Haven't met the others though. I wonder what the new Batman's like? Next to stealing J'onn's oreos, bat baiting was always one of my favorite hobbies. I wonder if he's anything like Bruce?

Anyway, I've got to go. There's a big football game tonight between KU and K-State. I bet Clark 25 credits that K-State would win. The big blue boyscout said we'll see.

Hah! KU's going down! Stupid Jayhawks.

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September 23, 2058

HAH!

HAH!

KU LOST! EAT THAT CLARK!

The boyscout owes me 25 credits now, which I need to pay off the bet I lost to Virgil. I'm still convinced that he cheated.

Either that or Richie rigged the online game for him. I wouldn't put it past them. That electricity happy superhero is going down the next time we play Speed Racer 3000.

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Author's Note: So what'd you think? I was going to wait a few weeks before doing this since I'm doing another JLU story, but I couldn't resist. For those of you that don't know, KU is the University of Kansas and K-State is Kansas State University. They're huge rivals.