Chapter 9: Journey to the Past

10 years ago

ThomaThomaThoma

Thoma stood by the doorway staring at the half-dead young man in the hospital bed. "What have you done to yourself, Ryu?" he muttered softly. In reality, there was no questioning just what Ryuichi had done. The empty Vicoden bottle and the drained fifth of Jose Quervo didn't leave any doubts. Thoma just couldn't believe that it had come to this.

"They tell me he should be awake any time now," a voice said from behind. K was holding out a cup of coffee for his friend/employer.

Taking the coffee, Thoma nodded. "All the more reason I should go."

"He still loves you."

"No," Thoma said flatly. "Ryu doesn't give a damn about me or you, or anyone in the living. I wish you'd stop telling me that."

"Fine," K agreed. "Do you want me to stay with him then?"

"Your our manager. Do what you think is best. It doesn't matter," Thoma lied. "I have a meeting with Atlantic records. I might just be able to salvage something out of this whole mess. If he wants all the rights to Grasper, their his."

end flashback

It was like a bad memory. The pair standing before his desk made Thoma want to scream. He had made his wishes known to Sakano--he really didn't want anything to do with any of them. But here they were. Thoma focused on a paper before him. "I don't have time for either of you today."

"I'll be good!" Ryuichi blurted out.

Blinking in surprise, Thoma let the page fall. Ryu looked pale. His large violet eyes looked haunted. It was impossible to deny the worry building inside of him. "What's going on here, K?" Thoma demanded.

The blonde man shrugged. "We were discussing how Ryu here will be taking his medication if he wants to help his band mates. Nothing too serious."

Thoma sighed and rolled his eyes. "Did you agree to this?" he asked Ryuichi.

"I don't want to take them. They make me feel all numb. They make Kumagoro be quiet. I have to keep him company. I have to..." the brunette mumbled incoherently.

"And what about Bad Luck?" K prompted. He put a hand out when Thoma moved to protest, and the executive was left to watch. "What about Shuichi and Hiro? Shouldn't you help them?"

Ryuichi looked conflicted. "Both. I can do both. Kumagoro likes Shuichi. I like Shuichi. He draws with me."

It took all of Thoma's will power not to scream at his former lover. How could Ryu be so detached? How was it that he couldn't see the effect he had on people? The childishness in Ryu's voice made Thoma sick. This was stupidity. He never should have agreed to this.

K broke Thoma's train of thought. "You came here to say something to Thoma, didn't you? Say what you have to say, Ryuichi. Help Shuichi."

Ryu closed his eyes, and his lips trembled. Finally, he looked Thoma dead in the eye. "You can't sink this band."

Thoma was complete thrown off guard. "What?"

"You can't sink us. We're too good for that, and you know it. Don't let what happened between us ruin this. I...I...Shuichi doesn't deserve it. He's every bit as talented as you or I ever were, and maybe even better," Ryuichi said clearly. That voice was the voice of Ryuichi Sakuma, the grown man, the intelligent musician. "You've got bands with less talent on the charts right now floundering at 30 and 40. You don't have a new hit maker in your stable. ASK will never do any better than what they've got right now. You know we could out sell them ten to one. Don't let this slip away."

"Why shouldn't I?" Thoma asked swallowing hard. "You have a nasty talent of running and hiding. How do I know you won't sink yourself and take them with you?"

Ryu nodded. "You're right. I'll take your fucking pills and talk to who ever K wants, but don't think for a second that I'm doing it for you."

Coldness built up in Thoma's gut. "Who are you doing it for?"

Ryu the man disappeared. "I like Shuichi...so does Kumagoro. We want to stay with him."

Thoma looked away. "I'm sure you do."

"I'm going home to Kumagoro. I promised we'd get ice cream if he was good while I was gone." With that, the brunette left Thoma's office.

K cleared his throat. "I'd still call that an improvement. I knew he was starting to come around when I saw him here."

"This band's good for him," Thoma admitted sadly. "I'll promote the band, but you have to keep him on the level. We can't have him hurting himself again. The singer that he loves so much is fucking another man."

K raise a golden brow. "How do you know that?"

"Yuki Eiri just happens to be my brother in law. Be careful with this, K."

ShuichiShuichiShuichi

Shuichi sighed as he read over the text messages Hiro had sent him. Maybe he should have told HIro where he was going. It wasn't that he didn't want to tell his best friend about Yuki; he just wasn't sure what to say. What was Yuki to him really? His boyfriend? He hoped, but he really wasn't sure.

Yuki was seated at his desk across the room typing. He looked soooo sexy with his glasses on, and so smart. Just looking at Yuki made Shuichi happy. Even Yuki's moodiness didn't dim Shuichi's enthusiasm. Did he see that? Shuichi wished he could just tell him--say the words--how much he cared. Yuki didn't know the sign, and writing it just seemed wrong. You should be able to tell the person you cared for. Yuki meant so much to Shuichi that he just couldn't seem to figure out how to say it.

Shuichi tapped on Yuki's shoulder.

"I thought I told you to leave me alone for a while?" Yuki growled.

Shuichi held up his note pad. I have to go. My roommate is worried about me.

"The redhead?"

Shuichi nodded. Hiro.

Yuki frowned. "Giro?'

Close. Hiro. He's been texting me, and I haven't returned any of them.

"Fine. Go home," Yuki said roughly. He turned back to the computer screen, but Shuichi wasn't so easily ignored. He pulled the blonde into a kiss. Yuki laughed huskily. "You really are a demanding little brat."

Shuichi smiled and waved goodbye.

HiroHiroHiro

Hiro played on of his favorite songs on his guitar as he sulked. Even after all of Shuichi's explanations, he was still pissed. How could he not be? They had just had a huge break, and Shu had to kill the mood by disappearing without a word. Shuichi knocked on the doorframe to get Hiro's attention, but Hiro ignored him. It was a rotten thing to do, but Hiro was still too angry to accept Shuichi's apology. The knocking got louder, and Hiro gave in.

"Can't you take a hint?" he asked sullenly.

I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to worry you.

"You said that already."

Shuichi nodded. I mean it.

"Don't ever do that again. I mean it," Hiro warned.

I promise, Shuichi signed.

"So?" Hiro prompted. Shuichi looked confused. "Tell me about him. This Yuki guy had better be worth it."

Shuichi's grin was huge. He is.