Just a short little humor piece I was working on awhile ago. Standard disclaimers apply: nothing and no one mentioned belongs to me, all characters are property of Disney. Hope you enjoy.


Jack was in the common room when he heard the scream, and he dropped his comic book to go and find the source. He knew it was Syd, he could tell it was in the vicinity of her room, but it was too terrified to be the result of a fight with Z, and he happened to know that Z had gone out to a movie, anyway.

Syd was standing in the hallway in front of her door, looking pale. "Syd? Syd, what's wrong? Is everything okay?" the Red Ranger asked urgently, putting his hand on her arm to try and get her attention. She looked at him with wide eyes.

"It's... in there," she said.

"What is?" he asked, wondering what could possibly have her so spooked. A monster, a killer robot, a giant gopher?

"The world's biggest spider," she said in a shuddery voice, and Jack grinned. Syd glared at him. "What's so funny?"

"You're scared of a spider?"

"I hate spiders," she said plaintively. "Stop laughing! You're the big man, you go in there and get rid of it."

He rolled his eyes, still smirking. "Fine, whatever." He strode into Syd's room with a purpose, and instantly spotted it on the wall. How could he not? It was black and enormous — much bigger than he was expecting, or was entirely prepared to deal with. He held back his nervous cough, and looked around for a jar. "Okay, big guy," he said, finding an empty glass on Z's bed stand. "This won't hurt a bit." But when he looked up, his prey was off of the wall. And he didn't know where it had gotten to.

Behind him, Syd squeaked, and he heard the door whoosh closed. He spun around, and the creature was on the floor. The room suddenly seemed a lot smaller. "Hold still, buddy, and this'll all be over soon..." He stepped forward slowly, and the spider scurried out of the way. Jack jumped back a bit; the thing was fast. He swallowed. "Okay... new tactical plan." He feinted to the left, hoping to convince the spider to go to the right, but it had the opposite effect. The spider charged at Jack.

"Plan abandoned," said Jack, tossing the useless glass onto Syd's bedspread. He hopped over the speeding spider and rushed out the door.

"Did you get it?" said Syd, descending upon him with a hopeful smile.

Jack shook his head, hoping he wasn't breathing too rapidly. "Nope. Sucker is fast."

"Well, what am I supposed to do now?" she asked.

"Do about what?" They turned to look at Sky, twirling a pencil in his fingers.

"Hey, Sky, you doing anything?"

Sky cocked an eyebrow. "What."

"We have a bit of an arachnid issue to take care of," said Jack.

"You're kidding, right?" laughed Sky.

"Cadet Tate, as your superior, I am ordering you to go and deal with a little extermination in Syd's room." Jack puffed out his chest, and fixing his teammate with a glare of authority that he knew Sky would ignore.

"This is one situation where you can't fall back on your Zord, huh, Jack?" Sky rolled his eyes at his teammates with a thoroughly annoyed expression, one that was too often seen as far as Jack was concerned.

"Sky, it is an order," said Jack, but he'd lost the commanding tone. Sky glanced at Syd, who was biting her lower lip and not meeting anyone's eyes.

"You guys," sighed Sky, and entered the room. The doors shut behind him, and Jack and Syd looked at each other. "Well," said Syd.

Sky came back out immediately, moving a little too fast. He regarded them with wide blue eyes. "You know, this isn't really my area of expertise," he began.

"Sky," whined Syd.

"Syd," he mocked back. He glanced to Jack. "It's a little..." he began, gesturing futilely.

"Large?" supplied Jack.

Sky nodded, looking a little shell-shocked. "Yeah. And fast."

"Okay, so, we need a battle plan," said Jack.

"I'd like to sleep in my own bed tonight," added Syd.

"We could get Bridge," said Jack with a shrug.

Sky and Syd shared a look and started laughing.

"What? What is it?" Jack demanded.

"Bridge is even more arachnophobic than Syd is," said Sky.

"He'd probably start crying," giggled Syd.

"Who'd start crying about what?" asked Bridge, coming into the hallway. "I was looking for you guys; RIC wants to go for walkies."

"You do realize RIC's not a real dog, right?" said Jack.

"'Course I do," said Bridge. "But he doesn't. What's up?"

"Syd's got a pest problem. The eight-legged sort."

Bridge's eyes widened very slowly as he came into understanding, and it was all Jack could do not to laugh in his face. "Um..." stammered the Green Ranger, "that..." He gestured wildly.

Jack finally let it out, a quick laugh that didn't sound mean. "It's okay, Bridge," he said, patting the other man's shoulder with a grin. "We're not going to send you in."

Bridge relaxed visibly, but Syd still looked a bit tense. "Well, what am I supposed to do? I need a place to sleep..."

"We could blast it," said Bridge.

"Right, Bridge, and we could destroy Syd's room while we're at it," said Sky, rolling his eyes.

"I know I came in late and everything, but how come you haven't come to our rescue yet?" said Bridge, raising an eyebrow. Sky was effectively silenced, and Jack was quietly impressed at Bridge's hidden ability to purposefully annoy Sky, when normally all it took was Bridge just being Bridge.

"This was not part of my training," said Sky shortly.

They stood in a semi-circle, each looking a little stressed. "Seriously, though, what are we going to do?" said Jack.

"Get it a uniform?" offered Bridge.

The four cadets exchanged glances for a few very long moments. Sky opened his mouth once or twice, ready to offer suggestions, but seemed to realize they had no merit, and closed his mouth again without saying a word.

"We could..." said Syd, then shook her head. "No, we couldn't."

"Maybe if we..." attempted Bridge, then bit his bottom lip, frowning. "Nope, wouldn't work."

"You guys practicing to be statues or something?" Z asked, coming up behind them. "If you're gonna do that, could you do it slightly out of the way of my door? Thanks." She brushed past them, opened the door, and plowed into the room she shared with Syd.

It was a wonder that, over the sounds of the Rangers all protesting in incomplete sentences, any of them hard the squish. Yet, the four Rangers in the hallway heard the distinct sound, and slowly, their gazes dropped to Z's boots. Her foot shifted slightly, and there was an unmistakable splotch of ick on the ground. Z looked up. "What're you guys staring at?"