Title: Sensitivity
Author: cinderalex (with some help from my Best Friend Becky on the storyboard end)
Disclaimer: I don't claim ownership of anything you recognize. The plot, however is mine.
Chapter Title: Nymphadora's Burdens (Double)
Chapter Summary: Remus and Sirius (try to) help Tonks deal with her mother.
Dedication: I dedicate this chapter to every woman who has ever tried to communicate with a man while PMSing and found him to be utterly useless and terribly annoying. Damn men, idiots all. They'll never understand. Even after three years, they still expect you to be rational. I mean, you'd think– sorry. A bit of personal vehemence seems to have seeped into my writing. Don't know how that happened.

Love and hugs to my beta, Bridget!

let it go–the
smashed word broken
open vow or
the oath cracked length
wise–let it go it
was sworn to
go

let them go–the
truthful liars and
the false fair friends
and the boths and
the neithers–you must let them go they
were born
to go

let all go–the
big small middling
tall bigger really
the biggest and all
things–let all go
dear
so comes love

-e.e. cummings

January 1996

Kitchen of Number Twelve Grimmauld Place

Sirius rued the day that the Daily Prophet had begun theming its crossword puzzles. It made them too predictable. He liked his puzzles with a little more variety, same as he liked his Christmas Pudding with currants.

"HELLO? REMUS! SIRIUS!" Tonks' emerged from the fireplace, shouting.

"No need to yell. I'm right here." He turned towards her, setting his puzzle down.

Her face was red and her lips were pursed. "Well, I didn't know that, did I? You could've been anywhere, couldn't you?"

He nodded agreeably and, after a moment, returned to his crossword, mostly to avoid getting sick from watching her pace up and down the kitchen.

This puzzle's theme was 'The Court System.' Sirius only had one more square of words to fill and he'd only begun the puzzle an hour ago. He knew altogether too much about 'the court system' to be tricked by some pretentious prat's riddles.

"Do you know if Remus is around?" Tonks sounded exasperated, but Sirius wasn't sure why. He hadn't said anything to set her off, or at least he didn't think he had.

Maybe a joke would get her to stop pacing and have a laugh. So he said coyly, "Depends on who's asking."

"WHO DO YOU THINK IS ASKING?" Apparently joking was not going to calm her.

"He's busy at the moment."

"Oh... busy. I see." She sounded skeptical. And surly. He didn't think she saw at all.

"Yes. Busy. He'll be down in–" –he looked at his watch–"--ten minutes."

"What's he doing then?" she asked, still appearing quite unconvinced.

If she wanted to know, he figured he might as well tell her. "Usually, after dinner, Remus goes upstairs to the loo. But he's pretty habitual, so I'm sure he'll be back down in the next ten minutes."

"You know his bowel habits?" Tonks was definitely disgusted.

Returning to his puzzle, he answered, "We live together."

Tonks huffed, still pacing.

He should know the first name of the wizard who started the Wizenmagot. William or Wallace or Raymond. That name was the key to the rest of the still empty box.

Tonks huffed again.

He was fairly certain that William was not the answer, because the second letter was probably 'a.' He was also fairly certain that the fourth letter was an 'l,' which ruled 'Raymond.' Before he could pen the 'w' of 'Wallace,' the paper was snatched out from in front of him.

"Hey! I was working on that!" If she insisted on invading the privacy of his kitchen to pace like a lunatic, the least she could do was leave him his puzzle to work on. Apparently her mother had failed at teaching her the courtesies of being a houseguest.

"Exactly."

He raised his eyebrows questioningly. "Exactly what?"

"Can't you see I'm a little upset?"

"Well, yes. What I can't see is what your being upset has to do with me."

He thought she was going to smack him with the newspaper. Instead, she shoved it into the overflowing rubbish bin.

"My mother, your cousin–" –she sounded accusing– "–asked me if I had a boyfriend tonight during Sunday Dinner."

He wasn't why this question would upset her. "Do you?"

"No. But that's not the point. The point is my mother wants me to settle down and make grandchildren for her."

"Sounds reasonable."

"I'M TWENTY-THREE! There is nothing reasonable about me settling down. And, like I said, I don't even have a steady boyfriend."

"Is that what you told her?"

"Yes." She stopped pacing. "Well, no, not exactly."

"What did you tell her, then?" She whirled around to face Remus, who had just entered the room.

Tonks was not in the mood for surprises. Remus' sudden arrival into the kitchen had surprised her, as had his very impertinent question.

"WHEN DID YOU COME IN?"

"Just now." He sounded truthful, but he was a man and she could never be sure with men.

"You didn't hear anything?"

"Well, I overheard quite a bit from upstairs, probably the whole exchange."

She'd thought better of him. "It's not polite to eavesdrop."

Sirius had the audacity to smile as he said, "Will you listen to yourself? Maybe then you'd realize that you're about to wake up my mother."

She wasn't about to take his lip. Or Mrs. Black's. So, she lowered her voice to spit, "Just what I've always wanted." She paused for dramatic effect. "Another mother to harass me about my failures as woman."

Remus moved toward the table. He pulled out a chair and gestured for her sit. Eying him suspiciously, she threw herself into the chair and crossed her arms over her chest.

Sitting down carefully next to her, he said, his voice irritatingly even, "You need to tell your mother that you are not interested in settling down right now. She'll understand that you have other things going on in your life right now."

"How do you know what my mother will and will not understand?" He had never even met her mother.

"Andromeda's a reasonable woman." She shot Sirius a sour look.

"You haven't seen her in years. She continues to become more and more unreasonable with every moment that passes. I can't stand it when she's unreasonable. Like, for example, when she suggests that I settle down."

"You could always pretend to be settling down," Sirius began. His tone of voice was patronizing, as if he believed this was the obvious solution, one that she should have thought of and already put into action. "Tell her you have a boyfriend. One that you really like. One that you think has engagement possibilities."

"I wish that would be good enough."

"And why wouldn't it? Sounds like one of Sirius' better ideas to me." Tonks glared at Remus. Sirius being patronizing, she could understand, but such condescension from Remus was unexpected and unacceptable.

If they were going to be patronizing, then she would be patronizing right back. "Because," she paused deliberately to glare at Sirius, whose eyebrows were raised with curiosity, "she would insist on meeting him immediately and I can't very well bring an imaginary man to Sunday Dinner, now can I?"

"No, I don't supposed you can," Remus conceded.

"Now wait a second," Sirius murmured, his eyes lighting with what was obviously already a horrible idea. "There is a way you could bring an imaginary man to dinner." He was looking at Remus now, who seemed to have picked up on his idea and was shaking his head emphatically.

"Whatever it is, it won't work. My mother is meticulous about background checking my boyfriends. If he were imaginary, he would have no background to check, and she would find out."

Sirius was grinning now, and his amusement irked Tonks almost as much as the fact that he thought he could solve her problem.

"Sirius..." Remus warned, and for the first time that evening Tonks was grateful for his presence.

Sirius spoke anyway, blatantly ignoring Remus' warning. "You could tell her you were dating Remus. He's alive to do a full background check on. And he's available for Sunday Dinners."

"No."

Remus spoke before she had a chance to voice her protests. Even though his initial response was the same as hers, his snappish answer had nettled her, so she said, "You're not the kind of man I want to bring home to my parents anyway."

He flinched, visibly, and then nodded. "I'm far too old and far too poor and far too dangerous to gain the approval of your parents."

"But that's not the point!" Sirius burst. "You're not trying to gain their approval. You're just trying to pacify them, trying to keep them off Tonks' back for a while so that she has a chance to find someone she really does want to settle down with."

For a brief flicker of second, the idea made sense to Tonks, though she would never admit it to Sirius. Then Remus asked, "What makes you think I wanted to volunteer as some kind of stand-in for her eventual boyfriend?"

"Like I said, it would never work anyway. My mother would see right through you." Tonks felt deflated. She wanted nothing more than to curl up in a ball and cry. She couldn't understand why she had been gifted with such an annoying mother. Or such disappointingly gay friends.

Rubbing her temples, she left the room in search of somewhere comfortable to collapse without another word to the two men left gaping in her wake. She'd had a long day.

A moment after Tonks' departure, Sirius rose and moved to follow her.

"You're going after her?" Remus asked, incredulous.

Sirius snorted. "No. I'm leaving that to you." He reached into the rubbish bin and pulled out the newspaper.

"That's unsanitary."

Remus rose, intending to find and comfort Tonks. Sirius was a cad and she deserved some sympathy. And empathy.

"Don't follow her just yet. Give her a couple of minutes to calm herself."

"Yes sir, Mr. Ladies Man." He shot Sirius a wry smile and continued toward the door.

"You should let her be for a bit. I'm serious."

"Exactly," he called over his shoulder.

He climbed the stairs and went to the drawing room where he knew she would be. But when he looked into the room, he didn't see her.

"Tonks? Are you in here?"

Perhaps she was lying on the couch. Quickly, instinctively, he surveyed the room. Not finding her, he turned to leave.

And then he saw her, launching herself at him.

He was about to die. And he knew it. She was still crazily, even homicidally, angry at him.

Her fingers descended ominously to his ribs. He didn't have time to be confused by her change in mood before he was out of breath with laughter.

She was quick, dancing her fingers up to his armpits and laughing madly, but he was stronger. Within seconds, he had her pinned against the wall, their fingers interlocked above her head. They stared at one another grinning widely and breathing heavily. Her lips were slightly parted and very close to his, so close he could taste the chocolate cake she must've eaten earlier.

To break the silence he said, "You're certainly in a better mood." He realized it might be a mistake to bring up her fit after he'd spoken.

Her smile twisted and she shrugged. "I realized I really don't give a damn what my mother thinks about my love life. It's fine just the way it is."

"Good attitude. I feel the same way," he agreed, although when her tongue darted out to wet her lips, he wasn't so sure he'd told the truth.

Her smile disappeared, and she pressed her lips together. Swallowing, Tonks deep brown eyes lowered to stare pointedly at his mouth. He wondered if she was conscious of the invitation she presented.

"I think you can let me go now," she suggested softly.

"Alright," he replied, voice hushed, unsure why they were whispering. He released her hands, but she didn't move, continuing to stare disconcertingly into his eyes.

Remus had made a mistake, letting her hands go, but he didn't know that. Yet.

Suppressing a shout of laughter, she took advantage of his lowered guard by grabbing for his wrists. Though she was successful in trapping one wrist, he threw the other one up and back, out of her reach. Jumping at it, she knocked him off balance. He grabbed at her shoulders, probably in order to steady himself and keep her back, however he only succeeded in bringing them both to the ground, Tonks spread out on top of him and their faces, again, imperceptibly close.

Remus squirmed beneath her for a several seconds before letting out a low, frustrated chuckle.

Tonks laughed with him, "Looks like I've gotten the best of you after all." She spoke the words against his lips. It only seemed natural that she should follow the statement with a playful smack. On the lips. His lips. Which were warm and wet and pressed lightly against her own.

Wanting to test their texture, she increased the pressure hesitatingly. Smooth lips yielded under her gentle insistence and she sighed against them in relief. For a moment they were both still. His breath, minty and moist, mingled with hers.

He moved slightly, perhaps to untangle himself, and suddenly they were kissing again. The hand holding his wrist drifted up, brushing over his pulse, to intertwine their fingers.

Her tongue she explored the contours of his lips, while the fingers of her free hand discovered the softness of his hair. Gently, he pressed his padded fingertips against her cheek.

Urgency and frustration flooded her. Arching into him, she attempted desperately to gain access to his mouth with tongue. Her fingers threaded in his hair, tugged slightly. He made soft, unintelligible noise.

She was kissing Remus. Remus Lupin. Incredibly Intelligent in a Sexy Way Remus Lupin. Sweetly Ticklish Remus Lupin. Gay Remus Lupin. Dating Sirius Remus Lupin.

Oh Merlin.

Horrified, she pulled back and rolled off of him.

She felt guilty. And aroused, which only made her feel more guilty. She didn't want to look at him, but she was certain he hadn't moved. He was probably still in shock, disgusted with her forwardness, with her femaleness.

"Well." Apparently he wasn't suffering from a loss for words.

Wanting to avoid further awkwardness, Tonks rose and headed for the door.

"Tonks, wait. You don't understand."

Without turning around she said, "I do. And I'm sorry."

Author's Note(s):

This was a short chapter. Maybe the long author's notes will make up for it.

I apologize for the lateness of this post. No excuse. (Except for there are actually a lot, but I'd rather not write a six page author's note.)

Now, I have really bad news. Schoolwork continues to be a burden. And I am Honors College Failing My Intro to Social Relations Class, which is very bad because Social Relations is (one of) my major(s). This means I need to put effort into that class and actually read the hundred pages assigned a night. Yuck. Here's the bad news: I am only going to be able to update every other week from now on. For the same reason, I have 'grounded' myself from reading fanfiction. It's terrible.

I send my love out to anyone who is NaNo'ing. I'm an Official Supporter and Encourager, though I am not participating. YAY FOR WORD COUNT!

I've been posting massive amounts of drabbles on my LiveJournal (link on my profile page). I am also researching what people actually think about when kissing there as well and would appreciate any feedback you're willing to give concerning that subject.

Reviewer Responses:

Now in alphabetical order thanks to a wonderful suggestion by Kerichi.

bri007: Laughter is good exercise. I am glad to help you keep in shape. I am also very fond of the scene with Sirius and Molly in the kitchen. For my job, I have to cook large meals with several other people and nobody ever agrees on anything.

Celi: Yes, Sirius baking in the kitchen makes a lovely picture. Very homey. And hilarious.

ellieo: Thanks so much for your review!

hesterlester: Why thank you, I am glad my writing is improving. I think that ch07 has more... voice, than the other chapters and that makes all the difference. As for the scones, your review sent me into a panic. I assume it is quite clear that I am an American for I make these British characters do unforgivably American things like have 'favorite colors' instead of 'favourite colours.' However, I used chocolate chips scones, because, I thought at least, scones were something we shared with the British, and chocolate chip scones are my favorite (not favourite lol). After your comment, I did some research and found that chocolate chips are not traditional scone ingredients, but rather something that we uncivilized brutes in America added to them, along with pecans. (I love I am considering changing the flavor (oh dear not again) of the scones, but I am leaning towards laziness.

KatieBell70: I completely understand the crazy balancing act one must make to read fanfiction, write fanfiction, and fulfill more pressing obligations, in your case, your children and in mine, college. Damn classes, expecting me to attend like I paid for them or something! I just figured that Lupin had to join Greyback between the beginning of the fifth year and the beginning of the sixth, and, for my story, him going right then seemed like a great plot device. However, now that I speculate further, you might be right about him joining later, like in the summer between the two years. Oh well, it works for my story this way. As for me developing it, I hate to disappoint, but, as I am only writing about one moment a month, I am picking and choosing ones which most pertain to the Tonks/Remus relationship. Thus, Remus' assignment will only be mentioned in passing and not dealt with in depth. I'm a cop out, I know.

Kerichi: First, I want to apologize for my lack of reviews to your story. I really, really want to read it, but my roommate told me she'd throw me out of the window on a burning futon if I read any fanfiction before I get my grade up in Social Relations. Soon (which means eventually, but probably not anytime in the next two weeks), I promise. Second, I believe that there's truth in JKR's Harry/Ron loving jealousy. Best friends can rarely avoid such feelings. Portraying deep social truths in fanfiction makes me incredibly happy. I'm such a pretentious geek. Thirdly, I'm glad to give you an excuse to eat chocolate. Go eat chocolate in honor of... me eating chocolate... right now. Fourthly, and you thought last chapter was a cliffie... LOL.

Kwala: I'm so glad you like this story. I know exactly how Tonks is going to find out Remus is not gay. I've known since the beginning. Hopefully, it will turn out as brilliant as it seems in my imagination. Thank you for your suggestions.

Lupin-n-Tonks101: So many fangirls think Remus and Sirius are gay that it seems entirely plausible Tonks would have this same misperception. Yay.

redremwhoozie: Thank you very much for the reviews. I would appreciate if you leant me back my Sirius and Remus so that I can write the next chapter, in which they are key players, or they would be, if they weren't rubber.

slightly so: It's a bit harder to justify Tonks' continual confusion now, eh? After that kiss, she must be blind (to what she's afraid wouldn't be there) or numb or at my whim to control...

zan189: About not letting you review, it's hard to explain and all my fault. So sorry. I'm glad you think Tonks is a liar for telling Remus that she figured out the werewolf thing on her own because I totally agree. However, it's a noble lie, as she's trying to protect Sirius from the wrath of his lover.