Disclaimer: I don't own G-Gundam, pout
A/N: Sorry if anyone is out of character or if I don't really use the names of certain people. Andrew rings familiar as to the name of Neo-Canada's fighter, but I wasn't 100 sure and was too lazy to look it up, so many apologies! I'm a little rusty with the details and truly just desire to get emotion across from who's important (Domon and Rain!) and that's about it. This is my first G-Gundam fic, so don't bash me too hard!
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Complex Simplicity
Chapter 1: Mad World
By: ABeautifulDisgrace a.k.a. Jamie
Rain stood before an open window, her hair bobbing in the soft breeze that sifted through the portal that separated her from reality. All that was behind her was forgotten, except for all the memories shared with one man: Domon Kasshu. The window stretched from floor to ceiling, the great double doors swung open wide, the curtains whipping around her as the wind picked up. Her eyes were large, a faded blue and bordered by streaks of red. An expression of grief, guilt and hatred twisted her once pretty facial features into a scowl. Her left arm was curled tightly around her middle while her right arm was bent at the elbow. The said elbow was tucked against her hip, while her hand was stretched out, palm upward, fingers curled somewhat to her palm. She didn't seem to be reaching out for anything, but it looked as if she had just froze. The hotel room was empty besides the normal furniture and a single bag which held her medical supplies and other necessities. There was a small metal rail settled upon rusted bars in front of her. It represented the barrier that feebly guarded the room's occupant from falling to their death.
---Flashback---
"Why did you place yourself in danger, Rain?" Domon's face was flushed a bright red, his teeth clenched as he growled the question toward the woman who cowered on the opposite side of the hotel room.
"I-I-I...couldn't just stay there and let him-" Rain began, but was quickly interrupted by him before she could even complete the sentence in full.
"Yes, Rain, yes you could have. How hard is it to do what you're told?"
Oh, so hard, her mind whispered deep within her conscious, when I know you'll be in danger, Domon. Do you expect me to sit idly by, watching when I could help you? Rain kept her eyes adverted to the worn carpet, tracing the faded paisley patterns mentally while tears burned unshed at the corners of her eyes. Despite the rebellion that built up within her, she kept herself quiet. She knew that if she would talk back, it would only make the situation worse. For once, Rain Mikamura did not argue with Domon Kasshu. If it hadn't been a serious situation, Domon would of called her on it.
But Domon was far from finished, as he began yelling at her again, "Do you realize that you could have died? What were you thinking, if you were thinking at all? Was it fun, Rain?"
Rain recoiled, leaving herself with nowhere else to go. Deep down, she wished she could materialize into the planks of wood that made up the wall behind her. Instead, she lifted her eyes to his line of gaze, hers showing the large amount of turmoil that twisted her heart into a knot. She knew very well that she could of died many times that day. She had been talking to Neo-Canada's Gundam fighter when he had announced his departure, to go find Argo and confront him about his wife's death. She knew also that nothing could stop him, for the desire to avenge a loved one's death was stronger than any emotion a human could feel. But anger, that had begun when she had fought with Domon earlier that day and continued when the Neo-Canadian had kidnaped her, had fueled her determination when she made the choice to leap onto the shoulder of his Gundam and come along for the ride. She hadn't stayed outside long. Her skills in mechanics had easily granted her presence inside the cockpit and she had immediately begun shouting lectures about his choice in actions. Lectures that had rewarded her with a swift punch in the abdomen as well as a horrific ride inside a cockpit which was participating in a Gundam duel. She remembered Domon's face on the vid-screen as well as his tone of voice when he had pleaded to his opponent to spare her from being punished for something she had nothing to do with. He had sounded like he cared at that moment, but where did that side of Domon hide? Or was it just my imagination? Had I seen and heard it through a haze of wishing rather than simple reality?
A tear slipped down Rain's cheek as she mumbled an apology - an apology that caused a reaction she would never forget. Domon had quickly advanced on her, grabbed her shoulders and shook her hard. He then dropped his hands from any contact with her, stared her directly in the eye and stated in a tone that revealed no emotion toward her, "You're fired, Rain. I will not have a team member who is so willing to both risk her own life as well as act impulsively on her emotions and interrupt a Gundam battle." And with that, he had leapt from the window, landing safely on the concrete below to disappear into the shadows.
---End Flashback---
As Rain recalled the event, she bowed her head until her chin rested against her chest and she felt the warmth of tears slip down her cheeks, a soft sob choking out from between her chapped lips. What am I going to do now? How can I live without him? Even if he doesn't want me the way I wish he would, at least as his partner, I could keep him safe...She tilted her head back now, more tears dashing across her temples and into her hair. Her breathing was ragged and her mind void of rational thoughts. Instead, they were irrational and emotionally impulsive.
One step forward would bring Rain straight into the night. She would fall fast, down many stories and land in a heap on the same spot of concrete that Domon had previously landed gracefully upon. Her heart constricted in her chest for the umpteenth time, causing her once motionless hand to curl against her breast, as if she wished her touch alone to stop the beating of her breaking heart. She thought of their other memories. Some happy, most sad. Memories which made her swell, for only a moment, with warmth that rushed down her toes and up into her cheeks as well as memories that dashed away all emotion and returned her to the empty shell she had become throughout the course of the day. How long she had been standing there was unknown, but she had not moved since he had exited angrily from her life.
Several hours passed by as she simply stood, staring out into the night as if some answer would appear before her. She squeezed her eyes closed, biting down into her bottom lip as her heart continued to race, feeling as the night air teased her cinnamon tresses with invisible fingers. If only it were Domon's fingers that caressed my hair and face, she thought bitterly. If only I knew why one moment he looked at me with so much adoration and the next with so much hate. Eyes still closed, she let out another sob, straining to hold control, but losing it before she could grasp it. Before her eyelids, she saw him speaking kindly to her, consoling her and then it switched to the many times he had literally and figuratively shoved her away as well as yell down at her and curse her for her existence.
All around me are familiar faces, worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head, I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow
An answer did show itself and Rain lifted her right foot from its previously glued spot on the floor and stretched the leg forward so that her boot actually reached into the vacant air. The many lights of the skyscrapers around her glittered like fallen stars and beeping horns from multiple cars could be heard from way down below. She took in a deep breath and held the position, hands now at her sides clenched in tight fists. Seconds passed and she exhaled loudly, bringing her foot back to the floor.
"No," she stated clearly, crossing her arms over her chest. "I will not be a stupid girl and jump out of a window to my death over a boy." Her head sagged, she losing the sudden surge of pride she had just felt and she sighed heavily, shaking her head to herself. "I will find Domon tomorrow and make him talk to me. I will not leave him be until he explains himself. I will confess-"
The door flying open behind her sent her hurtling forward, statement lost in the wind, her arms whipping around in circles to catch her balance. Her abdomen smashed against the railing that hardly stayed put after such force and she dangled forward, arms reaching outward. With any movement, the metal would groan with her weight and detach. She would be lost to the world, unable to tell Domon that she loved him. Yes, Rain Mikamura loved Domon Kasshu. It was then that Rain truly panicked and allowed fear to flood every cavity of her heart and soul.
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very, very
Mad world
Mad world
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Lyrics from "Mad World" by Gary Jules
A/N: R&R pretty please :) I don't know where this is going, just felt like whipping out some drama. This song inspires me to write angst, sadness and all that yummy goodness that hopefully hooks readers into digging further into my work! By the way, the song's from Donnie Darko, if your brain couldn't place it! Fantastic film. Anyway, like I warned, this is my first G-Gundam fic and it's rather an experiment. I felt that Domon and Rain felt these lyrics more accurately than Hilde and Duo. Hope you guys enjoyed it! And sorry about grammatical errors and the likes, it's rather late and I wanted to get it posted so perhaps, before I wrote any more (I am already dabbling on Chapter 2), I could have an idea where it stands. XOXO, Jamie.