A story written purely because I didn´t want to write Mary Sues and had to see how they work - here, you´ll find both humor AND Sue, so do consider this a Parody!Sue - two girls that are complete anti-Sues are sucked into the Sued world of the PotO movie!
Certainly my most Sued piece of writing, but simply
because I wanted this to be Parody!Sue. Really, the two main characters
are anti-Sue. If you knew us, you´d agree :-P .
I should note that this story has an unusual sense of humor, a mix of sarcasm and parody, so if you don't find it amusing, it's not your fault. Please remember that this is simply humor - not to be taken very seriously. However, it will be following the storyline of the movie for quite some time, I guess chapter 21 or so is the first after-movie chapter, so you can just skip to that one, if you like. Also, feel free to suggest changes, point out missing stuff - (Heather - thank you for pointing that out, I changed it to make it more believable. I´ll try to do something with the romance part, though I'm not sure how much I can change), but please, no flames. If you don't like it, why bother reviewing?
Anyway, enough is enough, I'm done, so enjoy.
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Chapter 1 – Just the average phans
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"I'm bored. Let's watch Phantom."
Amanda had uttered the phrase for about the zillionth time in the last hour, according to Regina's math. It was a stormy afternoon, they were in Regina's room – whose parents were away, working, even though it was a Sunday – and had watched the aforementioned movie two hours ago. Frankly, Regina wondered if there really was something else they could do, since the other DVDs seemed strangely boring – or, at least, she had seen them more often than Phantom.
Regina, who had just returned from vacation in Italy, returned with a DVD of the movie Phantom of the Opera, which both of the girls had been hunting all around the town, but always failed to catch it. The best they got was the soundtrack, and, as they both agreed, that would simply not do.
The pair had both recently turned sixteen, Regina being about two weeks older than Amanda. Both were friends from school for the past six years, both were home for that part of the holiday. In short, one was visiting the other and it was getting immensely boring.
Amanda was tall for her age, tanned and had semi-long brown hair. The hair was an intriguing part of her visage – no one, including her, knew what the original color was, other than the assumptions that it must have been a shade of brown, lighter than it was now. Bespectacled because she read far too many Stephen King books and stayed up late into the night (or, at least Regina assumed that had to be part of the reason), brown-eyed and sharp-tongued, she was funny in a slightly morbid way at times, sarcasm was her middle name, and generally, was a great person to hang around with, no matter what your mood was.
Regina was her opposite when it came to the physical – she was also tall, taller, perhaps, but the similarities ended there. Her hair was long and blonde, and she was often annoyed how her grandma constantly ranted about what a Goldilocks she was. It was one of the reasons she had dyed her hair months previously, as Amanda advised would be fun, but it remained blonde, not the rather drastic black some of her friends were suggesting out of fun. Then she would really look like a vampire, she told them. And it was true. She was so pale that she almost blended with walls at times, blue, green and hints of gray mixed in her eyes, so no one could ever identify their true color, and it was common knowledge that she was the local bookworm extraordinaire, sharp-witted but shy at times and rather proud.
When it came to their "Phantom characteristics", both had certain obsessions normal for a POTO phan – Amanda was quite the phan of Gerard Butler and always had interesting remarks of Christine's possible blindness or simple mental illnesses. Regina loved the story in every way and was convinced that the Kay backstory was the only real backstory. In short, both were normal obsessed phans.
The obsession came to the level when Regina announced she would learn to sing – partly because of Phantom, partly because she was really bored just doing schoolwork and surfing the internet. Amanda's idea of moral support was reading the textbook of musical theory and laughing her head off at what her "poor, poor" friend would have to get into her head.
Tonight, however, they simply wanted to watch the movie, for the x-th time. Not that it mattered. You could always find something new in the movie. So Regina lazily got off the couch, followed by a rather excited Amanda, whom every reasonable psychiatrist would now identify as insane, judging by the maniacal gleam in her eyes. It was time to bring out the DVD.
The plus of having an Italian copy was the Italian version – you had two versions of the singing, thus you could compare, mock, learn by heart and so on and so on. The sad thing was that the pair had perhaps exhausted all options already, and it was just the second day Regina had the DVD.
Regina slouched and Amanda hopped into the living room, where the former managed to start the TV and the DVD player by pressing a few buttons. In a few seconds, the main menu of the DVD appeared, the pair selected the desired language and began watching the film, making remarks about the flying nun accompanying the – as Amanda noted – perverted old Raoul on a wheelchair and began listing methods of fop-extermination.
After a while, though, it wasn't so funny anymore. Regina closed her eyes when the overture nearly blasted the TV in half and happily ignored the neighbors in the flat above them, who were, to be polite, rather unhappy with the noise.
By the time Think of Me ended, the singing managed to soothe her enough to almost fall asleep. Her eyes were closed, she didn't even register Amanda's frantic excitement. After a few minutes, however, even that seemed to fade. Amanda calmed down somewhat, half-closed her eyes and once she had found a comfortable enough position on the couch, she fell asleep with thoughts of a PONR scene involving her rather than Emmy Rossum.
Regina stirred when Music of the Night began to play and absent-mindedly opened her eyes just a little bit. The soothing voice of the Phantom sounded through the entire room and she ignored the crackling of the TV as a figment of her already over-active imagination. She also fell asleep, with a scene not unlike Amanda's in her head, although it involved the MOTN scene.
The TV continued to crackle somewhat, but the sleeping girls didn't really register it. Then, suddenly, it flashed with light for a moment, completely unnaturally, but – fortunately for the pair, for they would have been a sleeping toast if it would have – didn't explode. It simply switched off… with it came the lights of the room, the flat… the nearest ten blocks… and by the time the power returned, the couch and the throne-like chair were no longer occupied, though they looked like after World War III.
Both sleeping phans were gone… and not because they wanted to be.
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Regina woke up in the morning, expecting a sharp pain in the back, because her damned good memory reminded her of falling asleep on the wooden chair her dad favored so… and she was used to her bed. That would hurt. She groaned quietly, but discovered herself in a lying position, in bed. Inwardly, she thanked her parents – they were always so nice, so they probably moved her to her bed. Thank God.
However, the covers and the pillow weren't as soft as she remembered. She tried to roll over, but nearly fell off the thin bed. Sitting up, she frowned and sharply opened her eyes. she nearly fainted at the sight. Many small beds, old-fashioned furniture, a large room… this wasn't her bedroom. This was some kind of… museum? No, people didn't sleep in museums. Besides, the other beds were occupied.
Her nightgown was also different. It was a soft, flowing material with little flowers – it was completely white and… damn! Low-cut! She got up from the bed and walked to the nearest mirror – it was king-sized. It was as if cold water had penetrated her lungs. The person staring out of the mirror was many things, but it definitely wasn't her.
The height, age, and pale skin remained the same, but that was all she was able to recognize as herself. Her prized straight golden hair was now deep dark brown, chocolate-like, falling in gorgeous curls for which one required a whole team of hairdressers to maintain. The blue of her eyes was gone, replaced by light coffee brown. She frowned. She didn't like brown eyes much. But her entire face had a different bone-structure.
Being smart, she put two and two together, but she still didn't get where she was or how she got there. Regina rushed to the window and looked out. There was a large, 19th century-ish town out there, with people dressed to fit with the set. Alright, so it wasn't a prank played on her by Amanda. But still…
How the hell did she end up looking like Movie Christine in such a place?
A gasp from the left caused her to jump and turn sharply. Someone looking very much like Movie Meg was looking at her own hair, then noticed that someone was watching. Raising her fearful gaze, the blonde ballerina frowned and uncertainly asked: "Gin?"
"Mandy?" Regina responded with a question of her own.
The blonde in the bed sighed in some relief, if such a thing was possible in their situation. Amanda went through a similar chain of reactions as Regina seconds before, but then regained her calm. "Why the hell do we look different? And where the hell are we?" You could trust her to remain calm.
One of the other sleeping ballerinas stirred at the loud sounds. Regina luckily noticed this. It was almost morning, about five o'clock, but she didn't know how much time they had. If she was right (and she usually was) they had just come across one big mess and landed right in it.
"Bathroom. Now."
"Now? In this situation, you need to…?" Amanda demanded angrily.
"No, you idiot. We need to talk." Regina hissed, "If you wanna wake them up and explain that you aren't Meg Giry or whoever the hell you're supposed to be, they'll send you straight to the madhouse. Now c'mon."
Sulking, Amanda hopped out of the bed and followed the other girl out of the ballet dormitories, to the only place where they probably wouldn't be disturbed by anything. She didn't really know what this was about, but the frantic gleam in Regina's eyes she had only when she forgot about something as trivial as an essay that affected fifty percent of your grade made her think that the situation was serious. She groaned out loud. This was one hell of a morning.
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Read? Review! And tell me your thoughts if I should continue! This is fun!