Moonlight

A/N: This piece is a follow-up to my previous scene-filling pieces, 'Sacrifices' and 'Anxieties', and JenniGellerBing's fic, 'Blissfully Blank'. However, it can be read without knowledge of the aforementioned works. This fic is a one-shot to be inserted between the hospital wing and funeral scenes in HBP. Thanks to JenniGellerBing for the beta! Reviews would be greatly appreciated! Contains HBP spoilers.


And our world comes alive at night,
And like the stars, we shine so bright,
As long as you are mine.

- 'Vampires', Fastball

He could only see her silhouette in the distance, but he knew it was her. He told himself that was not a sign, that his ability to recognize Tonks merely by her outline demonstrated his keen perception skills rather than an undeniable attraction to an addicting yet unobtainable woman. But she was in his thoughts, all the time, forever...

He watched her from afar as he leaned against the cold castle wall. Her light robes rustled beneath the cool breeze and she wrapped her arms around her slight frame, shivering. His long legs closed the distance between them before his mind could even register the movement. And then he was standing beside her, looking down at a pensive Tonks as she stared morosely into the depths of the dark lake. He could just barely make out her pale face illuminated by the moonlight that bounced off the water's surface, but he could tell she had been crying.

Remus knew he should leave. He had far too much experience with grief in his life; he knew Tonks would want to spend the first night alone. But grief is a tricky emotion; it forces you to isolate yourself, yet the only way to fight it completely is to find companionship and even, possibly... love.

And he was... in love with her. He hadn't the faintest idea of when he realized this or what to do with these feelings, but he knew they were there. And she loved him, too, didn't she? Yes, she had told him months ago, after hearing rumors of a werewolf attack and thinking Remus had been hurt... and he had admitted it then, too, but realized long before that night that he loved her. And, even though he wished it could have been different, that the situation didn't require him to walk away, the knowledge that she knew allowed him to sleep just a little easier that night.

She loved him; he loved her. A revelation. They could help each other.

So he slid the worn cloak from his shoulders and draped it over hers. Perhaps it wouldn't warm her all that much, but it was more than she had; it was all that he could give. Startled, she turned, wand pointing up at him in a menacing way. He noted the traces of shock on her face when she registered who was standing over her. She gripped her wand even tighter at the sight of him, but her hand was shaking.

He knelt down beside her, eying her wand with mild curiosity. She glared at him before finally lowering her weapon, and turned away to look out at the lake instead. His eyes followed hers and the pair of them stared at the still water for a few silent minutes. Remus struggled not to shiver against the cool night air.

"It's cold out here," he finally stated, giving her a sideways glance.

She shrugged, his cloak slipping off her shoulders when she did so. He picked it up and draped it around her again. She didn't acknowledge the gesture.

"Dangerous, as well."

"I couldn't stay inside," she mumbled.

He found himself nodding sympathetically. He couldn't remain inside the castle either - it was why he, too, had slipped past the front doors of the castle long after the rest of its occupants had at least attempted some sort of tainted sleep. Every room, every wall, every stone held memories – good and bad alike. For each memory, Dumbledore had been alive and powerful. But now… He shook his head, unable even to think about it.

"What's going to become of us?" She finally looked at him. "The Order, rather?"

"We will mourn… and then we will persevere." He paused contemplatively for a moment. "We'll have to appoint a new leader, I suppose… and a new secret-keeper for Headquarters, but… Dumbledore will not have died in vain. We'll bring Snape to justice. We'll bring them all to justice."

"Good," she agreed forcefully, a flash of determination illuminating her gray eyes. But just as quickly, the look was gone, replaced by that same sad, hollow look as she turned back toward the lake. "I can't believe it – that he's –" Her voice broke – "dead. I always thought Dumbledore was, well, invincible."

"So did I. Tragedies like this… they serve as harsh reminders. He was… well, mortal… in the broadest sense, anyhow."

"If he can die, well…" She trailed off, and Remus was grateful for this. He didn't want to hear the words he'd been thinking – that if Dumbledore could die, then what hope did the rest of them have? But that wasn't the way to think – not with the war still going strong; not with Harry to look out for; not with the entire world to protect.

Remus' knees were beginning to ache, so he gingerly lowered himself onto the blanket that Tonks had transfigured from what had formerly been her cloak. He stretched out his legs and grimaced when the joints cracked.

"I am far too old to be sitting on the ground."

Tonks looked at him and rolled her eyes grandly before turning away again. "It's nice out here."

He allowed his eyes to glance up at the night sky, and noted that the stars seemed especially bright. However, the waxing moon and the warnings it brought caused him to tremble slightly and hastily look down. "Cold, but nice," he agreed.

"I've never been out here at night before. Didn't have much of an interest in breaking the rules to go stare at the sky when I was younger, I suppose," she said with a shrug.

Remus nodded. "Me neither. I wasn't quite myself when I roamed the grounds at night."

She seemed confused for a moment before saying, "Werewolf. Right."

"Yes. The beast tends to have more of an eye for human flesh than the scenery," he replied with a wry smile.

Tonks fell silent for a few moments, playing with a strand of grass beside the blanket. "I made a right fool of myself, didn't I?"

"Excuse me?"

"In the hospital wing earlier. Fleur - the most selfish creature on the face of this earth - doesn't care, Remus," she began in an exaggerated tone. "I don't care, Remus, let's just bloody shag already, Remus! Merlin," she groaned, "what was I thinking?"

"It wasn't –"

"And now everyone knows! I mean, Molly and Arthur already knew, but now - " She grimaced – "Fleur, McGonagall, and – oh gods, even Harry knows that I've been pining away for you like a school girl with a crush!" Tonks buried her face in her hands. "I really humiliated you, didn't I?"

"Not at all."

"Right. You hate me now."

Remus scooted closer to her and rubbed soothing circles against her back. "I could never hate you," he admitted quietly.

Tonks snorted.

"I mean that, Tonks. You're beautiful, intelligent, brave, and, above all else, you're not afraid to do things your own way."

She raised her eyebrows. "So, I'm stubborn?"

He smiled softly at her. "Those are your words, not mine. But who says that has to be a bad thing?"

"You didn't seem to be very smitten with my stubbornness last Christmas," she remembered, referring to their stint in the Hog's Head.

"I could say the same about you."

She frowned. "Well, you are stubborn. You won't even listen to me…"

"Wouldn't," he corrected. "I wouldn't listen to you."

"And now?" she asked, unable to hide the hopefulness in her voice. It killed him to think he could have ever squandered that beautiful optimism of hers.

"And now… I'm thinking about it – about what you said."

"Well…" She began, a grin forming. "That's a start."

"Indeed."

Remus leaned back, legs stretched out in front of him as he supported his upper body weight on the palms of his hands. The moonlight was quite hypnotizing, he decided as it bounced off the dark surface of the lake and framed Tonks' pale face. Like an angel, he thought. My angel.

After a few moments, Tonks stretched her limbs, curling upward like a cat before settling in a position mimicking his own. She turned to find him staring at her, and returned the attention warily. Remus lifted his hand to her face and brushed a mousy-brown lock behind her ear, watching reverently as her eyes drifted shut.

When he removed his finger, it continued to tingle at the memory of her soft skin beneath his.

Remus had missed that feeling - missed the feeling of her - during their time apart. Even before their first kiss in her flat, both of them drowning in grief and regret and the memory of Sirius, he had cherished the opportunities he'd had to touch her, replayed with keen accuracy each time he had caught her before she fell. He had felt something for this vibrant woman long before he had admitted it. She had brought color into his ever-gray world and he hadn't even noticed… until he left her. He had realized then that gray wasn't enough. Not anymore.

Tonks' body was close enough to his that he could feel her heat radiating, but she was still agonizingly far away. He yearned to move just a few more centimeters until their bodies were welded together. But he wouldn't, he couldn't… not yet. Not until he was sure he wouldn't lead her on any longer. Not until he was sure that this was what she wanted.

Merlin, he wanted to touch her.

She gave him a smug smile, and Remus thought fleetingly that she could read his mind. But when she climbed over his body, hovering above him, he could tell by the look in her eyes that she felt the same way he did. She wanted to be as close as possible to him. He flattened himself on his back and trailed his hands over the sides of her thin robes, remembering how the curves of her body felt beneath his palms, how sweet her lips tasted against his own.

She pulled away just before his hands could run through the softness of her hair.

He squinted at her teasing face. Gods, he thought painfully, she's going to make me wait just as I made her wait. She grinned down at him, her fingers tracing the faint outline of stubble on his face, and he struggled to breathe. He had been waiting so long for this. Too long…

She leaned toward him and whispered, "I thought you were thinking about what I've said."

"I am," he replied in a rough voice.

She pressed a kiss against one corner of his mouth and then the other, before pulling away again. "Then you should think."

"It's rather difficult to think with you…" He swore inwardly when he felt his cheeks burn. "Where you are."

"Why, Lupin, I do believe you're blushing."

He glared at her, but, in actuality, the teasing proved that he hadn't scarred Tonks permanently, that the war hadn't stolen away her optimism. She could still be happy; he felt alive again. She climbed off him and pulled his cloak tighter around her body as she huddled beneath it.

Remus studied her absently as his mind drifted. Why, suddenly, after months of refusals and hiding and unbearable yearning, did he believe what she said? Why could he finally accept that maybe, just maybe, Tonks knew what she was getting herself into and really, truly didn't care. She wanted him, beast and all.

Maybe it was the grief, the knowledge that life could end in a split second and in the most surprising of ways; maybe it was McGonagall's promise that Dumbledore would have wanted more love in the world; maybe it was just the hypnotizing moonlight. But whatever the reason, Remus couldn't fight against the magnetic pull Tonks seemed to have on him. He sat up on his knees and only gave her a few moments to register the pleading look in his eyes before his lips covered hers.

The embrace began tentatively, but the crackling power surrounding him – that ancient potent magic of lust - was pushing him forward, urging him to lower her onto the blanket without breaking their kiss. His fingers made their way through the silky strands of her hair and he could literally feel her hair growing beneath his touch.

Remus' hands dragged along her body, smoothing paths down her arms, her back, her hips. He could smell her sweet floral scent, the grass surrounding them, the cool spring breeze as it washed over him, and it became almost too much to bear. He pulled away from her lips, panting, and stared down at her.

Her lips were bright and swollen from their shared kisses, eyes dark beneath hooded lids, and her skin… He leaned forward and pressed a series of kisses against her exposed neck as it glowed a marble white beneath the pale moonlight. He let the tip of his tongue drag along her burning skin, trailing patches of heat in its wake. She moaned and threaded her fingers in his hair, pulling him down for a slow and brief kiss before releasing him.

"Remus Lupin," she whispered breathlessly. "Did you know that I fancy you?"

He laughed genuinely – a glorious feat that only Tonks could elicit - for the first time since he had left her to live with the werewolves. "Nymphadora Tonks, I fancy you, too."

"So then we're…?" She gestured between their bodies, his still hovering above hers. He attempted to move, but she grabbed his robes determinately. He didn't fight her.

"Together?"

"Yes."

"I hope so," he responded anxiously. "That is to say, if you still want –"

"Don't be daft, Remus."

He couldn't hide the boyish grin that crossed his features. "All right then."

"So what exactly does 'together' entail?" she wondered aloud, staring resolutely at his chest. "I mean… considering our whole situation with the war and the Order and all…"

"I don't know, exactly. But I know it means we won't be apart."

"That sounds good to me," she replied with a smile. "So what happened to thinking about what I've been saying?"

"I've thought too much throughout my life… I've decided that it's best to let the heart do the talking, once in a while."

She pulled him down for another breathless kiss. He chuckled against her embrace and she swatted playfully at his chest. "I've been telling you that for ages, Remus."

"Well, I am nothing if not stubborn."

Tonks laughed and let go of his robes, smoothing her hands down his chest sheepishly to reduce the wrinkles her grip had caused. Remus shifted to lie beside her, looking up at the sky in a contented silence.

"The sky's really beautiful tonight," she whispered, and he could almost detect a sense of awe in her voice, as if she hadn't expected such beauty to exist anymore.

Remus turned on his side to face Tonks. "You are beautiful." With a satisfied smile, he watched as she blushed and bit her lip. He had been longing to admit that to her for so long, and suddenly he felt younger and freer than he had in ages.

Tonks returned her gaze to the sky, but not without taking his hand in hers and squeezing it reassuringly. He, in turn, gaped at her and wondered just how a young, clumsy, carefree soul could summon such strong feelings of ease and safety in a poor, war-weary werewolf like himself.

He turned toward her and noticed the way her dark blue eyes shimmered against the reflected light of the stars, and how her skin glowed a striking white beneath the dark sky. She was exactly what he had needed all along.

For the first time ever, Remus Lupin appreciated the moonlight.

Fin