A/N: Konnichi-wa, minna-san! Well, look what we have here... A new story from me! I actually came up with the idea while I was lying in bed this one night, thinking up different quotes and this just popped into my head. I must admit, I am a little nervous posting it but I hope that all of you enjoy it.
Disclaimer: As you know from my other story, I don't own Inuyasha or the characters affiliated with him. They belong to the remarkable mind of Rumiko Takahashi and any one else that might have rights to them.
Dedication: This fanfiction, like my last one, is dedicated to a very special friend of mine. She is my older soul sister, my best friend, the other half of my soul. She moved away a little while ago back in September, but we have kept in touch since then and now are closer than ever. It has been tough to not have her by my side, though each day I remind myself that I am living and surviving every day for her. She brought me out of my shell and for that she will always be in my heart and soul. By the time that this story is posted she will have already gone back to Fresno and will be even farther from me... But hopefully someday she will be able to visit and for that I look forward to the future though it holds many uncertainties. "Blissful Suffering" is dedicated to Shoni for all that she has done for me and all that she has been to me. I love you lots, sweetheart! May you soar above adversity always on the winged flight of angels.
Summary: The time had finally come. The time in which Inuyasha would defeat Naraku once and for all. But what will happen afterwards? What does the Shikon no Tama have planned when Kagome finally pieces it back together with the last shard? And can her deepest wish, a wish from the darkest chambers of her soul be granted?
Life is ours in vain
Lacking love, which never
Counts the loss or gain.
But remember, ever
Love is linked with pain.
Light and sister shade
Shape each mortal morrow
Seek not to evade
Love's companion, Sorrow,
and be not dismayed.
Grief is not in vain,
It's for our completeness.
If the fates ordain
Love to bring life's sweetness
Welcome too its pain.
- Oodgeroo of the Noonuccal
Parted Souls
"We can do this, Inuyasha," Kagome whispered softly, looking up at Inuyasha with the strength she had left. They had been fighting for so long and now there seemed to be no hope for them. One by one they had fallen: first Sango then Miroku and now Inuyasha and Kagome were all that remained of their small group. But the both of them were injured and close to unconsciousness, their very blood was soaking into the Earth. What else could they hope to do? What could stop Naraku that had only grown stronger in his absence?
Kagome refused to give up. They had come this far and survived, she refused to die at his hands. Not now and not ever.
"If we combine powers we can defeat him," she explained, drawing on the miko powers that she was born with. They swirled around her in thick waves, both beautiful and dangerous as her hair was whipped away from her face. Inuyasha had never seen her like this. The Kagome he knew- No, the Kagome he thought he knew was not bound by what he made of her. There were so many sides to her and it made him feel like he could never fully know the real Kagome. She was strong- Inuyasha believed her to be the strongest of all of them- yet she was vulnerable at times. Standing beside him now Inuyasha realized that he was catching a rare glimpse of Kagome in the purest form: beautiful and everlasting as the sweet snow that melted into spring.
Her resiliency infused him with a new glow and he found himself nodding. He flashed Kagome a half smile as one of his pristine fangs glimmered in the fading light of day. He would believe in her light for it would guide and protect him as it had always done. Drawing the Tetusaiga forward to point it directly at Naraku's heart, Inuyasha unleashed his own store of energy: a powerful and deeply crimson color that contrasted sharply with the gentle blue that was Kagome's. The powers intertwined with each other's and wrapped their way around the large sword, the ground beneath their feet cracking with the immeasurable force.
Inuyasha pulled Kagome to his side for he needed her solidity, her presence as he swung his sword down with one mighty sweep that sent the mingling powers skimming across the fragile ground. The sheer velocity ripped long streaks through the dirt and was much too fast for Naraku to dodge; he stood in fear of what was to come next and to emphasize his stance, Naraku's mouth hung agape. He had underestimated Inuyasha and his wench and that mistake would cost him dearly.
"Die, you bastard!" Inuyasha's scream echoed around the whole castle, it seemed to resonate through the Earth itself. The sound was bone chilling as the graveyard soil that had reeked from the Band of Seven. Only this voice was bent on revenge, on justice for what Naraku had done to ruin so many lives. The wide blast hit the sinister half demon at full force squarely on what should have been the place where his heart resided but all of them knew that he possessed none. There was only an empty cavity that was now being torn in two as the blast sliced through Naraku's body.
Pain. So much thrummed within him that it dappled in front of his crimson eyes. He opened his mouth to scream out his anguish but no sound came, the air pushed from his lungs brutally. Each breath he did manage to take was an agonizing experience that caused the blood to trickle forth from his mouth in a lone stream. Before Inuyasha and Kagome's eyes, the force of the impact tore through his body and ripped Naraku completely in half. His bodily fluids spewed over the Earth in hot, thick droplets that swirled with black wisps that was unlike human blood. It was not red but a dulling mix of both darker than red crimson and a blackness that soaked into the Earth and spread its darkness throughout. Whatever substance it touched, such as the plants, they wilted quickly.
Pieces and chunks of the half demon ruptured into the air, falling gradually to the floor with one last burst of sickening miasma. Naraku's head was the last thing to touch ground, his eyes staring disbelievingly at the hanyou before him. How could he be defeated? How! He was a mere half demon and Naraku was surely more powerful than he could ever be.
"Damn... you, Inuyasha" he managed to utter with his dying breath. Crimson eyes glazed over in death no matter how he tried to fight its grasp upon him. For a few more moments, the blood gushed forth from Naraku's neck, twitching as it did so but then it gradually faded into a trickle. Naraku was dead. Inuyasha quickly covered Kagome with the long red sleeve of his haori. The miasma was poisonous to all that inhaled it, especially if they were mortal such as the girl that stood by his side. Kagome was already weak from the blood loss she had sustained and a single inhale could be her last one, something that Inuyasha was not willing to risk. Kagome was grateful that Inuyasha held her so close to his body as she leaned into him, closing her azure eyes for a moment to rest. The energy she had transferred to Inuyasha had taken much out of her body and her spirit. His protection offered her the greatest happiness that nothing else could replace inside of her heart.
The moon's rays broke through the purple clouds with a resiliency that warmed the soul of those that beheld it for it symbolized a new hope. The bringing of Naraku's death that each had waiting for for years on end. And that end had made it on that cool summer night that no one would forget as long as they lived. The story would be passed on to the generations to come and would go down in history as a legend. Naraku, the one creature that a demon could not seem to kill, was defeated by a half demon.
"The last piece..." Sango whispered, as she picked up the remaining shard of the Shikon no Tama. Could this really be it? Could they have...? Yes. They had done it: defeated Naraku after all of these years of chasing and fighting, of heartache and pent up anger. But now... now it was over and done with. Miroku's curse could be lifted, Sango's brother Kohaku could finally rest in peace. Inuyasha had avenged Kikyo's death. Every sliver of vengeance evaporated from their bodies.
Miroku hurried toward her as soon as her soft words registered in his mind slowly but surely. He couldn't believe what he was hearing and had to make sure that what Sango was said was true. "Are you sure, Sango? Is that really the last piece?" he asked cautiously, reaching out a hand to clasp over Sango's that was holding the jewel shard. The cool wind blew past them in a gentle whisper, causing the monk's purple robes to billow around the two of them. It served as a somewhat cruel reminder of Naraku's poisonous miasma that always exploded from him when he was injured. Even now that he was gone, especially for that short of time, it still brought shivers up and down the spines of whoever saw them. Sango's eyes met his, the uncertainty clearly etched into her delicate features and it brought an equal anxiousness to Miroku's face.
They had spent the last day after defeating the sinister half demon sitting in awe. Shocked, if anything. They had recovered from their extensive injuries but that was not what they were focused on. Their goal had never seemed reachable no matter how the group of them had believed that it could be done. No words were spoken, only the sound of breathing resided in their ears and it was broken only by the sound of the crackling fire and the chirp of the crickets as they sang their night songs. It was heavenly to sit near each other and not worry. Not have to worry about who was to come after them, who would come for their lives. They were safe but as much as the joy filled their hearts, it did not sit well within. How could, after all of this time, could they be... safe?
Naraku's defeat... the task had been a miracle in itself. Inuyasha still did not know how in the all of the seven hells they had finally killed him. The battle was epic, lasting and it had truly frightened him. For one of the few times in his life, Inuyasha had truly been afraid of what could happen if he- if he did not possess the strength to kill the bastard. That would mean losing Miroku, Sango, Shippo, and... and Kagome. The only person that truly mattered to him. The one person that he... loved. He repeated the words over and over in his mind, his heart soaring with the realization. No, with the admittance of it after all of these years of watching her. Being by her side, sitting close by as she slept with the moonlight streaming down upon her.
Those thoughts aside, the awkward group began their final search. However this small journey was for the jewel shards that Naraku had left behind. Digging through what was left of the castle that he had made his shelter in Inuyasha, Sango, Miroku, Shippo and Kagome gradually came across each shard of the much sought after jewel. Some were chunks and some were single pieces but despite that each one brought a great comfort to whomever found it because now the jewel would be put to good use. And when that would happen it would be no more.
"Yes," was Sango's simple answer, holding the glowing shard up to the moonlight for all of them to see. Shippo leapt onto her shoulder, staring up at it with a mixture of awe and slight foreboding. He wanted to touch it, hold it to see if it were real and in the end he stopped himself. If he were to touch it Shippo was sure that this would shatter, end up destroying this long awaited dream.
Sango looked to their reincarnated miko for guidance as all of them had done for so long. Kagome had become the glue that held the group together, their anchor when the world seemed to be turning upside down. Her smiling face lit up the darkest of hours with its brilliance. But with the remaining shard that she held came the painful realization that they had all put off for the longest time. They had never before come this close to achieving what all of them shared but now that Naraku had been killed, the thoughts came sprinting back mercilessly. What would become of Kagome? Would she be able to stay with them? Come back to this time and place like she had been doing for so long? Or... or would the Gods send her back to her era?
Sango did not want to think of that possibility as she walked to Kagome's side and handed her the jewel piece. She was trying her best to smile happily but the attempt ended in failure when Kagome's azure eyes met hers. She knew as well what could happen now that the Shikon no Tama could be completed and the fear was evident in her eyes. Kagome stared at the nearly finished orb in her hand that glowed with a heavenly lavender light then shifted her gaze to the shard in her other hand and then back again.
She seemed to debate whether to actually allow the last piece to fuse with the others. What she wanted was to remain with her friends, with her son Shippo and with the one she loved. A slight brush of her side startled Kagome from her thoughts, turning her head to see amber orbs that were Inuyasha's eyes. But instead of the hard glint they usually carried the golden color was softened with concern and with an emotion that Kagome had never seen in Inuyasha's eyes before. Not even when he looked at Kikyo. Strange... it almost looked like... love... But that possibility seemed so foreign to her mind even as Kagome's heart longed for it to be true.
"Go ahead, Kagome. Finish this," Inuyasha urged in a quiet tone, trying to sound aloof despite the conflicting emotions coursing heatedly through his veins. Some part of him knew what was to happen and that part of him longed for it to come true. He had no place by Kagome's side because he was just a lowly half-demon. He could never hope to make her happy. But the other part wanted to scream for all of this to stop so that Kagome would not have to leave to her bizarre world, probably never to return again. That thought clenched around his heart mercilessly. He desired her there by his side because he could not imagine a day without her anymore. Inuyasha couldn't pretend that he could be alone, not like he used to.
The fact that he was so close to her, that his hand rested against her hip with such care, brought Kagome a strength that she didn't have before. With him there by her side she would be able to go through with this and she still prayed that she would be able to stay with them because they were her family in this era. She refused to give them up for anyone. Kagome tore her gaze away from the shard in her hand and met each of their eyes, smiling softly. But to the rest of the group it was as if she were trying to memorize their faces, each smile and each light that was sparkling in the depths of their eyes.
Sango's eyes filled with tears involuntarily when Kagome's eyes swept over her and at that moment Kagome had already left them. Why couldn't she protest then? Why when it mattered most did her voice suddenly disappear? With nothing said, Kagome fingered the jewel once last time, the weight of it heavy in the palm of her hand. Drawing in a deep breath she brought the jewels together and in response the group crowded around Kagome's slender form, wondering what would happen. The jewel of four souls had never been used before since its creation, making this the very first time that it would grant someone's wish. And the last time as well.
Shining light accompanied the melting of the shard into a full jewel, its full power enveloping Kagome's body like an embrace as she was lifted into the air. Silence hung like a suffocating grasp over their forms for short minutes that felt more like an eternity that could never end. Shippo was the first one to react out of all of them as he scrambled forward. When he tried to jump to catch her body he encountered a strong, invisible barrier that flung him away with a sharp crack of lightening. Inuyasha's heart leapt into his throat when he saw that she was being taken away, leaping up in order to stop her from leaving.
"Kagome!" Inuyasha screamed loudly, frightened of what was happening. She just kept getting farther and farther away from him. Whatever that light was it was the one that was stealing her and he wouldn't stand for it. He drew his sword, something that he thought he would never have to do again, and made a hit at the barrier surrounding her. But he expertly avoided any part of Kagome's body, knowing that the blast from his weapon could injure her, or worse, kill her. But the barrier hugging Kagome's body absorbed all of the power that the Tetusaiga had within it and it retransformed until it no longer looked like a fang.
Inuyasha stared at it in frustration before tossing the damned thing aside and going after her himself, claws raised to rip to shreds what dared to take what was his. Growling profusely, his claws hit the barrier one last time before it disappeared, stealing Kagome with it.
There was nothing below her and nothing above her. Just the beautiful atmosphere of a varying rainbow after the rainstorm. The colors shifted around Kagome subtly but with a beauty that stole Kagome's breath away from her. She didn't know what this place was but the feeling she received from it calmed her initial panic of being taken away from her loved ones in such a way.
Where am I? The question repeated itself in Kagome's mind as she turned her head from side to side. It puzzled her that she was slowly being lowered down through the dimension that she was in. But what was happening she didn't know. The jewel was supposed to grant her wish, not take her away from Inuyasha and her friends. Her ebony expanse of hair swirled around her with the rippling current of wind but oddly enough Kagome could not feel the wind's touch like she should have. She could feel nothing. What kind of place was this?
"Welcome, Kagome," a voice greeted her, soft and velvety as it drifted to Kagome's ears. She looked down to see a single woman standing in a patch of forest green grass. She awaited the moment when Kagome's feet touched the blades of grass, watching as she struggled to right herself once more. It felt strange to be back on solid ground when she had been floating for what seemed like days. Kagome looked to the woman once more as her hair drifted around her for one last time and settled upon her slim shoulders and school uniform.
Before Kagome had even the chance to ask, the woman continued to speak in soft tones that seemed to echo around the whole world. "I am Midoriko, the woman from whence the Shikon no Tama had first come. And you are the one that has merged the last shard."
Kagome merely blinked stupidly, uncertain of whether she was dreaming or not. But from what she could see, Midoriko was real. She never thought she would meet the first priestess, the one that battled evil until her body could take no more. All four parts that make up the soul were combined into the Jewel of Four Souls and forced from her body. Every demon and human desired it for their own but none had succeeded in getting it except for Kagome and Inuyasha.
Midoriko stood there before her in all of her pure glory, dark hair and eyes shining with a heavenly light that seemed too good to be true. Too sweet to be upon the earth that they lived in with its wars, bloodshed and evil. Yet, at the same time, she was at home amongst the beauty, the stars and the blushing sunsets. Her soul was the purest and strongest among life for there was evil and there was goodness. One could not survive without the other.
"Then that means that the jewel will grant me anything I want, right?" Kagome ventured, drawing a deep breath as she studied the orb clenched tightly in her hand. With Midoriko close by, it was even more radiant than it had been in Kagome's presence. Their mingling spirits brought out its brilliance, its ability to grant whatever desire resided in the heart. Capable of wondrous things and capable of bringing chaos to an unsuspecting world.
Midoriko's face was suddenly sad, the emotion weighing heavily on her delicate features. She answered slowly, picking her words carefully, "Yes and no." When she saw the confused expression on Kagome's face she sighed. She didn't want to explain the hindrance, the limits of the jewel. Most believed that the Shikon jewel's power had no bounds. That it could grant any and everything.
"You will be able to have anything you desire from the jewel while at the same time you will not," Midoriko started, seating herself on the grass. She patted the place across from her in a clear invitation for Kagome to sit down. Her slender hands crushed the shining blades of grass even as they repaired themselves. Kagome sat down with her legs tucked beneath her, all of a sudden anxious. She didn't care for the look in Midoriko's eyes when she stared at her.
"The one thing that you cannot have is the one thing that your heart and soul wants the most: to be able to remain with Inuyasha in this world. You see, if you were to remain then another soul must die to open a space for you in this world. But even then it will be a cursed life, a half-life. One that is wrought in agony because the soul that died will never rest in piece, will haunt you, and that is something that the jewel cannot give you," Midoriko whispered. She was watching the play of emotions across Kagome's angelic face. Anger, betrayal, loss. Pain. Pain of the heart and pain of the mind. Something that no medicine can heal.
Tears came swiftly and in great numbers. They fell on Kagome's clenched hands like raindrops from a winter sky that missed the shining sun. It hurt, everything hurt so much that she was unable to draw in a breath. An invisible hand was squeezing her heart mercilessly and ripping it in two at the same time. It tore away the tender flesh and the strong defenses she had put up, exposing her vulnerable side for everyone to see. Kagome had never wanted to feel such pain, it was overwhelming and powerful. Much too powerful to be kept inside of her for so long. She had harbored it since the moment she had realized that she had fallen in love with Inuyasha.
She wouldn't be able to stay with him. She couldn't be with Inuyasha like she had hoped, and why? Because the jewel could not grant her such a wish, but could grant the wishes of demons that only needed it to gain more power. Would anything ever end in happiness? Kagome turned her pain outwards and dropped her head to hide the tears and her shame. Her ebony hair fell past her shoulders and cascaded heavily to the floor, as heavily as her heart was falling to the floor. She clamped a hand quickly over mouth to force back the small cry that threatened to burst from her.
Midoriko could only watch with growing lament as Kagome's shoulders shook in her grief. She wished to comfort the girl but knew that no words that she would say could ease the anguish. Time would heal the wounds or, at least, she hoped they would.
"I will bring him to you so that you may say your farewells," Midoriko said gently.
"Damn it, Kagome!" Inuyasha howled at the surrounding trees. He dug his nails into the dirt and scraped backward, creating deep wells within the ground. Just when he thought that she was out of danger, he had gone and allowed her to be captured once again. But he didn't know by whom. Why couldn't he protect her! The others had gone around to look for her, to try and find what could have dared take her. But they weren't so sure that she was even here in Feudal Japan any longer. That was what they dreaded most of all.
He cracked his pinched-closed eyes and saw that his form was glowing. Inuyasha's golden eyes widened considerably and he felt himself being lifted away from the ground. And yet Inuyasha did not panic as he should have. Somehow he knew that this would lead him to Kagome. And to something that he had never wanted to say to her.
The scent reached him before anything else. That prickling wisp of salt and anguish that he could not handle. Kagome was crying. His Kagome was crying. As always it turned his heart over and made his insides mush. He had always believed that it was a moment of weakness, that he couldn't love Kagome because that would only slow him down. Seeing her now, Inuyasha didn't want to feel that way anymore. He couldn't believe it anymore.
"Kagome?" he called out gently, his voice sounding foreign even to his own ears.
Kagome's head snapped to the side, drinking him in with water-drowned eyes. "Inuyasha," she breathed and her tone was a healing balm upon him as she stumbled to him. Her arms enclosed him in her blessed embrace, wound around his neck gently but firmly. It was as if anything less might mean chancing him disappearing beneath her fingertips. That was something that she did not want to risk, not when the possibility was looming so close. Kagome thrilled when his own strong arms caught her and held her as sweetly as she did him.
"I can't stay with you, Inuyasha," Kagome sobbed into his neck, "The jewel can't grant me that but I'm going to stay no matter what. I'm going to try and find a way to stay with you. I love you, Inuyasha!"
Her tears streaked down the skin of his neck, burning him with their anguish. If only he could stop them. If only he could take away the pain that plagued them both and make it disappear. But he couldn't and that hurt most of all.
He had no kind words to offer her, not like Kouga could. Kagome deserved the best that a man would offer. That was something that he could not give even though Inuyasha could easily capture Kagome for his own and hold her to him for he could see that she loved him without her voicing the words. And he loved her with all of his being. She was his life, his reason to live that life. So many times he had wished for death, never having the strength to enter that world but he did not have the strength to live among the living, either. But with Kagome, with her by his side, smiles seemed to be a natural part of him, and laughter, something that he had not done since his mother had died, flowed past him as easily as breath. And because Inuyasha loved her, he could not do that to her.
"Kagome," he murmured softly, cupping her cheeks with his clawed hands. He ran his thumb over her soft flesh, mindful of the talons on the tips of his fingers. So smooth, silken to his touch even with the tears that graced her cheeks. She looked up at him hopefully and closed her eyes when he leaned closer to her. They met in a bittersweet kiss that tasted of tears, of sorrow, and of love. It told of his undeniable anguish at their parting, of the happiness she had given him so unconditionally. A small spark spread between them at the small contact as Inuyasha plundered her honeyed mouth with his, savoring her taste slowly. Deliberately. She tasted of everything that he had imagined and so much more. Inuyasha was robbing Kagome of breath while at the same time he was giving it to her and Kagome sighed into his mouth, causing his arms to tighten around her small form. Bringing her closer to his body when it seemed impossible that he could.
The world underneath their feet seemed to shift and twirl endlessly and that was how Kagome and Inuyasha wanted it. They desired for that precious moment to never end so that they could stay in each other's arms. But it couldn't. Like the rest it was slowly drifting apart and Kagome sensed that as she did what neither of them thought that they could do: Kagome pulled away. Inuyasha leaned his forehead against hers for a long moment to regain the breath she had stolen from him, the one that he had so willingly given to her.
With grace, Inuyasha lifted Kagome in his arms like she was no more than a child and walked her to the pillar of shining light that awaited her. It had appeared when the time for Kagome to leave was drawing near. He placed her inside of it so that she floated upwards slightly, looking like an angel without her wings, glowing golden and radiant. The tears were continuing to fall down her cheeks as she gazed at him. Kagome couldn't gather the courage to speak so she reached out slender fingers to trace the contours of his face, memorizing every inch of his face so that she would see it always. His eyes fluttered closed as if in a dream, taking pleasure in the feathery soft brushes of her fingertips. She was his to keep, his to love and cherish, but not his to hold.
He caught her hands in his gentle ones and pressed a fleeting kiss to each palm, holding her to the ground for just a little while longer. "Promise me that you will live happy," he pleaded to her in shattered beats of his strong voice. There were no traces of arrogance now, only his desire to know that she would live and be free. He could continue if she was happy. "Promise me?"
Kagome nodded silently, not trusting herself to answer him or say anything. But in her heart she promised him, with every fiber of her soul she would live life and think of him with her every waking breath and through the watches of the night.
Inuyasha smiled as she gradually slid away from his grasp to be taken upwards. He held his hands up for a moment, praying and hoping that she would come back when he knew in his heart that it was impossible. A tear made its way down his cheek but he made no move to stop its descent. It was shed for the anguish in his soul, for the part of him that was being stolen forever. But also for the happiness she had given him, for the light she had brought, for the unconditional love she had bestowed him. For as long as Inuyasha lived he would never love another as he loved Kagome.
Midoriko's voice weaved its way around Kagome's heart when she was watching Inuyasha become smaller and smaller. Make a wish, Kagome. Make a wish from the bottom of your heart.
A watery smile curved Kagome's lips as she once again closed her eyes. "Please let them be happy. I wish all of them were happy." Her words drifted up to the sky, to the Heavens in sparkling flecks of gold and silver and were lost in the pristine clouds.
A/N: So how was it? I have some thoughts in mind about continuing it but I really don't know... So it's up to you. Do you think that this should be a one shot or should I continue on with the story? I already have it planned out but I'd like to know your opinion. If I do continue it will be only three chapters long. So tell me when you review! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it! Now press the tempting purple button and review if it's not too much trouble.