Colorless Heart

Chapter One Reunion

For the Soul is Never Colorless

She remembered that day well. Very well, it had just stormed the night before and the air smelt clean and fresh. The clouds remained a light grey and filled the whole sky in its hazy blanket, people walked by slowly as if there was no hurry left in the colorless ninja village of Konohagakure. But one young lady amongst the crowd stood out from the dull grey around her. Haruno Sakura's pastel locks caused even those who knew her to look twice. It was the only spot of bright color in the grey village.

Sakura had just celebrated her 24th birthday but she didn't feel any different from when she was 17 and first lay with Sasuke. Her long lasting chase for the Uchiha's heart had finally paid off after his return to Konoha. During the war against the sound Sasuke had rounded on Orochimaru and killed him by his own hand. He disappeared from the battlefield and when he returned he had a bloodied Akatsuki cloak draped over his shoulders. Sasuke had used Orochimaru, as his own test to see whether or not he had the strength to kill his older brother was what he told the Hokage during a meeting to decide whether or not he should be allowed to return to Konoha.

After the meeting the broken Uchiha came to her. Her of all people she had thought as he walked into her apartment. First it started out with a small conversation mostly Sasuke asking about their team and Konoha. Then he began to ask about her and after answering his question of whether or not she was with a man already began to kiss her. Sakura had been so startled she had pulled away and asked why he was doing that. Sasuke did not answer as Sakura hoped, he had said in his cold voice, "Because I want you, Sakura. And you want me!" Sakura gave herself to him that night; she gave him herself because she thought she knew what she wanted…she thought it would be wonderful. So she gave herself to a cold-hearted man with a colorless soul. And thus began the relationship that would numb her down to her very soul, and rip her spirit down until she was no more then a zombie with a soul as colorless as the village and the man she had thought she loved.

So as the people on the streets saw her as a beacon of happiness amongst the grey sadness Sakura slowly was decaying inside where no one could see, her scars hidden under the long sleeves of her blouse. Sasuke had once again left without a word on a mission and wouldn't be back for sometime, but that didn't stop the two other members from Team 7 from meeting. Sakura had a lunch date with Naruto and no amount of rain would stop her from seeing her one true friend.

Sakura turned off from the streets and walked towards the Ramen Stand. Pushing back the cloth that hang down she saw Naruto had beaten her there. He turned and smiled his famous cat grin.

"Konnichi wa Sakura-chan! Don't worry I only ordered two bowls of ramen, plenty of room to spare! C'mon sit down, we've got lots to talk about."

Sakura couldn't help but smile at the older and some what mature Naruto. He was one of the strongest shinobi in the village and was well on his way to his dream of being Hokage.

"Konnichi wa." Sakura said plainly and took the seat next to him. "So, where have you been lately?"

"Oh you know, around. Went on some missions with Neji and Lee. Oh that's right!"

Naruto began to shuffle through his pants pocket and then produced an envelope with a strange array of heart stickers on its front.

"Heh, Lee said to give this to you. That guy doesn't give up! I mean you've been going steady with Sasuke for what? Seven years? I'm surprised you guys haven't gotten hitched yet!"

Sakura took the letter and pushed it into her skirt pocket and sat up without a word towards Naruto's final comment.

"I've been helping around Konoha. Mostly work for Tsunade-sama. Nothing really has happened around here—"

"Except the rain." A voice from behind finished her sentence. Naruto looked startled for a minute then turned around, and as soon as he saw the person behind him he lit up like a light.

"KAKASHI-SENSEI!" Naruto said so loudly his voice became as high pitched, as it was when he was a child.

"Ne, Naruto lower you voice."

Sakura watched Kakashi with interest; she had not seen her ex-sensei for years really. Sasuke had basically forbidden it all together.

"Konnichi wa Sakura." Kakashi said in his normal lazy tone and suddenly it made Sakura want to tell them everything, about Sasuke, and about her own recurring need to take a kunai to her arms. For a moment all of her walls had come down.

Naruto was asking Kakashi a boatload of questions about where he had been and why he never visited. While doing his best to ignore the hammering sounds of Naruto's voice he caught glimpse of Sakura watching him. He turned lazily a little ways to look at her better. She had grown up quite a bit since he had left the three of them, but that wasn't what got his eye. Her eyes…the once bright jade and dissolved into a cloudy color. Under his mask Kakashi's expression was changing rapidly to worry.

'Those eyes…something's wrong…I have to get Naruto out of here. Hmm."

"And you never EVER WRITE!" Naruto had finished his yelling and was about to start again when a third bowl of ramen was placed in front of him. "RAMEN!"

Kakashi smiled and took the stool next to Sakura. She no longer stared at him but instead stared blankly forward.

'What is going on?' Kakashi furrowed his brow and decided to wait for her to be alone before he confronted her…but should he even try?

The reunion had ended and as Sakura got up to leave Kakashi stopped her, "I'll walk with you." Sakura had a mixture of relief and her now blank expression on her face at the thought of possibly getting everything that weighed on her out in the open.

They walked side-by-side down the darken alley. It was deathly quiet, which was somewhat a good thing from Naruto's yelling. Her apartment came into view but Kakashi tugged on her arm towards a different direction.

"We need to talk, Sakura." Kakashi said without warning as he led her behind a couple of trees obscured from sight.

"Something is wrong—"

"It's nothing." Sakura said flatly and somewhat in defense. Talking seemed like a good idea a few minutes ago but now shame had silenced her.

Kakashi gave her a stern look, "Don't lie to me. I know something is wrong…you…have changed Sakura, and not in a good way I might add."

Sakura was split in two, part of her wanted to pour her soul out to Kakashi but part of her thought about Sasuke…and what he might do to her.

"I can't…" Sakura's voice broke and she could feel the tears welding up behind her eyes.

" Yes you can…" Sasuke's hot breath ran past her ear as he began to take off her skirt.

"No…Sasuke please."

"Sakura…" Sasuke slid his hand through her lengthened hair. "I like that you grew out you hair for me."

Sakura was becoming more terrified by the second, "Sasuke…I know you're hurting but I don't—" It was too late. Sasuke had want he wanted and all Sakura could do was go with the feeling that had entered her.

She stood alone in the bathroom…a kunai in her hand. She didn't understand what she had done as she looked at the long cuts on her arms. Had she done this? Fearing Sasuke would see the cuts she bandaged her arms and told him a fairy tale about being attacked during a mission. But the ritual continued every time she felt dead after having sex with Sasuke.

Sakura's soul was crushed under the weight of the memories of Sasuke, and she burst into tears that shook her whole frame. Slowly she began to fall to the ground, Kakashi helped her to sit down on her knees. As soon as Sakura was down she reached out a little ways to Kakashi who wrapped his arms tightly around her. She clutched unto his jounin vest soaking it with her tears, she could barely hear Kakashi's voice as he tried to sooth her.

Finally Sakura was silent. She felt numb inside and as though nothing mattered. She felt the urge again to slice open her arms…to see color come from her. Then with a feeling of emptiness Sakura fell asleep in Kakashi's arms.

Kakashi had then picked her up bridal style and taken her not to her apartment, because he didn't know that Sasuke was gone, but to his.

He lay her down on his bed and covered her with a blanket. He sat down on a nearby chair and waited patiently for her to wake. There was much he knew Sakura had to tell him. 'Especially about those scars…if Sasuke is hurting her I think I might just kill him if Naruto or Lee doesn't get him first.'

Sakura moved a little and a faint whimper came from her. Kakashi frowned with agonizing worry. Sakura didn't wake up after several hours so Kakashi got comfortable in the chair and fell asleep himself.