My "Lovely" Family

Chapter Three: Meet Your New Neighbors Boys!

Kids are bratty, annoying, little hideous munchkin creatures from hell! I hate the looks, the smell, the taste, ARGH! EVERYTHING ABOUT THEM! I didn't even like myself as a kid...! So why the hell God chose today to invite them into my home!

Shishio stood there with tears flowing out, "WHY GOD!!! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING TO DESERVE THIS!" He fell to the floor sobbing, entrenched in his misery and pain.

Yumi stood there a bit shock. She didn't think he was going to take the news this harsh and so she rushed over to her husband's side and comforted him. "Anata... It'll be ok. You can get through this! It's not that bad..." Yumi said as she tried to sooth him by patting gently on his sobbing back, "It's not as bad as the time you thought you caught AIDs."

However, this was all such a weird scene to the five boys. They had no idea why he was crying nor did they even care a bit.

"Hey old man!" The boy called Sanosuke called out to Shishio. Sanosuke stood there laughing at him, making Shishio rise up in anger. "You know," Sano said between his laughter, "Real men don't cry, only gay sissy men and women cry. Don't tell me you're gay!"

"I'm Catholic!" Soujirou shouted joyfully!

"..." --- Everyone

The three other boys laughed out loud while Aoshi silently nodded. "Gay sissy! Gay sissy! Gay sissy!" Little Yahiko repeated after his older brother. Yahiko-chan had always enjoyed imitation of people, especially his cool, older brothers.

SMACK!

"Oh shit!" Sanosuke screamed!

The five boys ran away as Shishio had gone crazy and ran after them with Yumi's kitchen mop. "GAY?! You wanna call me gay! GO AHEAD, I DARE YA!" Shishio shouted as he ran on a rampage after the boys. The boys all rushed and scrambled to a safe place away from their new angry father figure. Suddenly...

DING DONG!

Yumi opened the door. To her surprise, it was Okina! Which was strange since Okina never visited them before. He was always a grumpy old man to Yumi and Shishio, the two families never got along.

The conflict started when Yumi and Shishio first moved in. Okina had been living in the neighborhood much longer before they had. The problem Yumi and Shishio discovered on the first day was that Okina raises chickens. His whole life. So it was not an easy thing for Yumi and Shishio to try to convince him to get rid of it. However, the problem was not because Yumi and Shishio hated chickens. Well, Yumi didn't hate them; Shishio did. But anyways Okina raised hundreds of chickens in his yard. Often, some of the chickens had crossed Okina's territory and into Shishio's. Even though there was a fence between the two households, they would "fly" over. (Maybe it was because they were practicing their escape route. Okina's living quarters for them were a little cramped.) But as the chickens continued to hop or "fly" (whatever you would like to call it) over the fence and into Shishio's backyard, Shishio got extremely pissed off.

One day Okina's favorite chicken disappeared. How he could tell that one was missing out of the hundreds, is still enigmatic. Shishio was Okina's prime suspect. No one ever hated Okina's chickens like Shishio did so he marched over to his house and complained. Shishio denied everything. Okina left angrily, still in disbelief that Shishio would not done such a thing.

The next day the door bell rang. Okina went to the door and opened. On the footsteps in front of his house was a brutally murdered...fried chicken!

They never talked since that day.

"Good evening Yumi-san! And how are you today!" Okina greeted with a sweet voice.

Yumi knew that he wanted something from them. It was not usual for him to nice to them. "Good evening... I am doing well." Yumi raised a brow, "What brings you to our house?"

"I want to invite you over for dinner. I hear you have kids now!" Yumi jumped at the thought that Okina just found out. But how? That was really quick. Does the whole neighborhood know now? That just made it worse since their neighborhood was so gossipy all the time.

"It's nice that you and Shishio decided to settle down with a family but adopting five poor African boys is a little bit much huh?" Okina laughed.

"Wha-?" Yumi was shocked, "Okina-san, they are no--"

"Well anyways! BRING THEM OVER!" Then Okina quickly left down the steps. Yumi couldn't say anything else.

"You better come! I still remember about the chicken! I can still sue you for it!" Okina left that as a blackmailing farewell...

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DING DONG!

Kaoru quickly ran to the door, "I'll get it!"

She opened the door slowly. Then she peek her little head out the door. In front stood Yumi and behind her were five boys. "Yumi-san, come in!"

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It was awkward.

It was the first time Yumi had ever entered Okina's house. She had never even stood in the fronts of his doorsteps even until today.

Now they were having dinner. It was awkwardly quiet and still as Yumi sat at Okina's table. On one side sat Aoshi, Kenshin, Sanosuke, Soujirou, and Yahiko-chan. The opposite side facing them was Tomoe, Megumi, Kaoru, Misao, and Tsubame-chan. Okina sat at the head of the low rise Japanese table.

"So where is that Makoto Shishio?" Okina asked Yumi with a grin.

Yumi lowered her head and nervously replied, "He's...feeling under the weather today Okina-san. It's best to have dinner without him."

A vein popped on Yumi; she knew the real reason why he's not here.

"Okina wants to have dinner with you! You better come! Now is the best time for enemies to make up!" Yumi screamed at Shishio, hitting him with a pillow. The five boys were running, yelling, and playing in the background.

"Never! I don't ever want to see that old wrinkled butt face!" Shishio whined as he blocked the pillow attacks.

Yumi sighed. She knew Shishio could be immature but if he goes on like this for ever, Yumi definitely won't stand for this.

"I bet he's faking it!" Okina cried. He stood up from the table with his fist in the air. Holding his prodigious fist of pride, Okina cried, "Shishio, I won't let you mock me!!!!!!" Okina ran out of the house and into Shishio's house. Yumi and the kids stood up and looked outside from the window facing her house.

They couldn't see what was inside but heard something breaking and shattering and from time to time, some screams.

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It was still awkward.

Now that Shishio was at the table, with a few bandages, and Okina there, with also some bruises, things got even quiet.

"So what are we having," Shishio asked with a grin, "Are we having...some...fried chicken?" he chuckled. Okina, on the other hand, still was stone cold.

Trying not to let Shishio's insult get to him, Okina replied back calmly, "No. No fried chicken today I'm afraid. In this household we are not coldhearted, bloodthirsty, chicken murderers...unlike someone," he mumbled the last part under his breath.

Yumi had enough of his, "My God! You two act as if you're in a Japanese soap opera and YOU OKINA," she pointed at him, "Act as if you had an affair with the chicken and SHISHIO," she pointed him also, "found out and killed it!"

"For the hundredth time, I DID NOT KILL THE DAMN CHICKEN! God smite me if I had Okina as a wife..." Shishio yelled.

"OH YES YOU DEAL YOU SAD PATHETIC MAN!" Okina yelled back.

Luckily the dinner table was not awkwardly quiet anymore; however it didn't get any better. Actually it got worse. Then something happened that made the whole night go from bad to chaotic.

Being born as a trouble maker, Sano flicked some rice from his spoon at Yumi. The rice fell down into her chest.

"AHHHHHHH!" Yumi stood up screaming, thinking a bug went down her shirt.

Yahiko-chan, thinking that it was a cool thing to do, took his bowl of HOT soba noodles and chucked it randomly. Unfortunately for Shishio, it fell on his head and he instantly had second degree burn.

"Hey don't do that!" Misao angrily stood up and threw ton-katsu (pork cutlets) at Sano. The chunks of pork hit him but also at Kenshin and Soujirou.

That was when a huge food fight occurred.

Tomoe held Tsubame in her arms as she rushed for safety! No where! It was a war zone and women and children did not matter! How are they going to survive!!! Oh kami-sama!

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"GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!! AND DON'T COME BACK!" Okina shouted as he slammed the door in their faces.

Standing there miserably, Yumi and Shishio were drenched in water and groggy food. The boys didn't seem to mind, considering they were boys. They love food fights.

The reason why they were wet was explained with Aoshi-kun thought he could end the food fight by shooting everyone with water from the hose outside. Now Okina's house was a mess.

"This is why I hate children..." Shishio said bitting against his jaw.

"God! I didn't ask for children! I'm a good girl! Why me!?!?" Yumi cried out loud.

The boys just laughed.

Soujirou looked at Shishio and said, "Shishio, you're so cool! Can you teach me how to fight like you!" he looked at him with adorable, glinting eyes.

"Don't speak. Your voice makes my ears want to bleed." Shishio replied. Soujirou just laughed and smiled, "Haha! Shishio, you're so funny!"

"What are we gonna do... Okina's house is a mess. We have to clean it up for him, it'd be the polite thing to do," Yumi looked at Shishio.

"I'm not cleaning that rotting old corpse's house. I've had enough fun time at his house already."

"Well then... Maybe the boys should do it. It was their fault for the food mess," Yumi thought to herself, "No... They're all troublemakers. They'll make even bigger mess!"

Then Shishio stopped, "No... That's a great idea! The boys SHOULD clean up Okina's house. They have to.. THEY HAVE TO!" He grinned.