Chapter 4: Awareness

Author's note: Hi again everyone and apologies once again for taking so long to update. Truth is that I got caught up in writing other fics (including another two Fruits Basket ones) Should hopefully get some posted up soon so you can see that I haven't just been doing nothing! Hope you enjoy this chapter and thanks for reading!

Last chapter:

Tohru wasn't stupid; Yuki knew she could feel that there was something going on and that she would worry about both himself and Kyo.

She would worry and she would try to fix things and she would end up being hurt by Akito.

It was inevitable. Therefore they couldn't afford to let her know what was going on.

Yuki didn't even have to ask Kyo to know that he felt the same; he had already seen it in Kyo's eyes that very morning; the pain and the desperation and the protectiveness that he thought he kept so well-hidden.

They couldn't tell her...instead they would live out this fantasy until the end and he just hoped that the memories they created could keep them warm in the bleakness that would surely follow.

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I tried to earn my way

I tried to change this mind

You had better believe that I tried to beat this

Sick Cycle Carousel, Lifehouse

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Tohru opened her eyes slowly, squinting against the sunshine coming through a crack in her curtains.

She smiled; she had always liked sunny days but she had come to appreciate them even more since moving in with the Sohmas.

A sunny day meant that Kyo would smile more and he would be more easily persuaded to accompany her on a walk or help her with the shopping. A sunny day meant that Yuki could spend time at his secret base and he would invite Tohru to come with him. A sunny day seemed to bring all of the zodiac out of themselves a little and Tohru knew that she could always look forward to visitors.

She had always liked sunny days but now she loved them as they invariably made her feel as if she had been adopted by a large, dysfunctional family.

She glanced at her clock as she sat up and stretched; the alarm wasn't due to go off for another half an hour but she was wide-awake now. Standing she stretched again and flung her curtains and screen door open.

The air was still crisp with the chill of early morning and Tohru inhaled deeply while turning her face up towards the sun in appreciation of its warmth.

She dressed quickly, trying to ignore the tiny frission of excitement that set her heart speeding...she was most definitely not hurrying because she knew that Kyo would be the only other person up this early, most definitely not...

Tohru knew he trained every morning in a clearing near the house; she could see it from the kitchen window so getting up early to make breakfast or prepare bento lunches was the perfect excuse to watch him.

Not that she really needed an excuse but she had an uncomfortable feeling that Shigure would tease her about it or Kyo would train elsewhere if he thought he was being observed. She didn't want that because watching the way he moved fascinated her...he was so graceful where she was clumsy, each movement an exercise in controlled strength.

Sometimes she had even considered asking him to teach her or tried out some of the movements from the martial arts books she had borrowed from the library...but even the basics seemed to elude her and she didn't want to ask Kyo for help until she was sure that she wouldn't completely embarrass herself in front of him.

She measured and washed the rice more thoroughly than usual, anything to prolong the moment before she would have to turn away from the window.

Kyo paused suddenly, mid-way through a routine, and turned towards the house as though he could feel her eyes on him.

Flustered, Tohru ducked below the sink and counted slowly to ten before daring to peek outside again...after all the rice could do with being washed one more time...

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Kyo could feel a prickling between his shoulder blades as if he were being watched but when he had turned to look there had been no-one there.

Logically it could only be someone who lived in the house... if not for school Yuki would be nocturnal and Shigure was loath to leave his futon until the morning chill had long since dispersed...which only left Tohru and he had no idea why she would be staring at him with enough intensity to draw his attention.

Even the thought of her watching him at all made him feel uncomfortable, embarrassed... yet at the same time proud that he was able to hold her interest.

Tohru, the girl who had turned his life upside down and back to front so many times that he still wasn't quite sure which way he was facing...the person who had given him back something he had lost many years ago. Her acceptance gave him hope for a future which he had never dared to dream of before. She gave a new purpose to his training...it was no longer a distraction from the inevitability of his imprisonment, but a possible escape.

He glanced sidelong at the house once again but his peripheral vision caught no movement so he moved into the final routine, his focus settling as he thought of the future that he would soon have to fight for.

No matter what it took he would win.

He would win because the only other option was no option at all.

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Yuki frowned at the sun sneaking into his room; he could tell without even looking at his clock that it was far too early for any sane person to be up and about. Turning over he snuggled back into his futon and surrendered himself back into the grips of his happy dream.

Shigure took one last look in the mirror, allowing himself a rakish grin at his reflection. Looking good could only improve his persuasive power and he would need all of it today. Akito was growing restless as the time limit for Kyo defeating Yuki drew nearer. She didn't seem to doubt that Kyo would not win...but the continued presence of Tohru in the house was making her nervous.

Tohru was a wild card...and she had already managed to do so much that others could not; sometimes it seemed as if everyone was just holding their breath, waiting for her to do the impossible. Something about her somehow made the impossible seem possible...and it was that something that had made Shigure ask her to stay, all that time ago.

And Akito, knowing Shigure, was suspicious about what he might be planning.

It wasn't only that; Tohru herself made Akito uncomfortable, though she tried to hide it as best she could. As tempted as he was to say he could read her like an open book, Akito could be dangerous so first he would have to find out exactly what it was about Tohru that put her on edge.

Shigure knew that Akito already felt threatened by the amount of loyalty that Tohru commanded within the cursed Sohma members; perhaps even more than she did as their God.

The truth was that Tohru was too successful in making those cursed with the zodiac animals believe that they could live normal lives...and if they could live normal lives there would be no reason for them to stay with Akito.

Shigure straightened his tie needlessly once more; he refused to be frightened of Akito...and he refused to back down no matter how often she pushed him away and told him that she had no need of him. He would make sure that she wasn't left alone and he would continue betting on Tohru being able to change things.

There wasn't much time left...and perhaps it wasn't fair to rely so much on her without even letting her know just what the risks were...but if not for her, there was no hope for any of them.

If Tohru couldn't break the curse...well, Kyo's imprisonment would be the least of their worries.

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Tohru was on the balcony outside their bedrooms, humming as she hung out the laundry, like she always did. Kyo felt a sudden flash of irritation; why was she always working? He knew that she saw the housekeeping as her way of paying rent, but between cleaning up after them, schoolwork and her part-time job, sometimes it seemed as if she never had any time to relax.

"Oi", he called gruffly, shaking his head when Tohru nearly jumped out of her skin. How someone could be so completely unaware of their surroundings he had no idea.

"Y-yes!"

She turned around quickly, getting herself tangled in the sheet she was just hanging on the line.

Kyo sighed, then stepped closer to help her with it, "Have you had breakfast yet?"

She shook her head, just as he had expected her to; as usual she wasn't taking proper care of herself.

"Leave this and come and get something to eat."

Tohru shook her head again, "I'll eat something after I've hung these out to dry."

Kyo frowned, "Fine. Hurry up then!"

He sighed again as Tohru immediately rushed to follow his instructions, putting herself in danger of getting tangled up again. Without saying anything he stepped in to help. When Tohru looked at him questioningly he couldn't meet her eyes.

"I'm hungry, that's all"

She simply nodded, but she didn't stop smiling for the rest of the time they spent hanging out the laundry.

Kyo flushed, thinking of Tohru; recently, whenever she was around he found himself wanting to reach out and touch her, sometimes just to confirm that she was there...and sometimes to almost mark her as his.

The possessive instinct was strongest when he saw her around Yuki. He wasn't sure when exactly it had started.

From the first day he had met her something about Tohru had made him want to protect her; she was so deceptively strong yet fragile at the same time. Sometimes he thought she was stronger than him, sometimes he wanted to scream and tell her to stop smiling and admit when something was bothering her. Sometimes he wanted to be the strong one for her...after all she did it for him everyday without even seeming to realise just how much it meant to him...to all of the cursed Sohma. So the protectiveness was nothing new...but the awareness; when had that started?

Maybe with the physical contact that Tohru had brought into their lives.

It was all so natural for her to rest her hand on someone's arm when she was talking to them or to touch her hand to their forehead if they looked unwell...but for Kyo and the rest of the Sohmas it was unusual. The first person with whom Kyo had had any real physical contact with was Kazuma and between learning to avoid physical contact to prevent accidental transformation and the fact that his parents avoided it as much as possible, it had become something rare and precious. Kagura's touch was unpredictable, caring one moment and murderous the next but Tohru...unconsciously he had accepted her touch and even come to expect it at times.

She was always hesitant, as if expecting rejection but even that small, light touch could calm his temper in a way he had never thought possible...because it reminded him that she needed protection and reassurance as well, even if she always tried to put up a strong front. It made him feel...needed somehow.

It wasn't the big things; Kyo knew that it was the little things that he would remember about Tohru.

The way her eyes would light up with her smile, the feel of her hand creeping into his or the weight or her head resting on his shoulder. The way she would hum as she made riceballs for breakfast and sometimes sing aloud while hanging out the laundry. The way she would chew on her lip when she was worried or really concentrating on something; the way her apron tie would always come undone when she became flustered or the way she struggled to fold the sheets...he would remember all these things and more.

"Kyo?"

He looked up to find Tohru watching him curiously. A second later her hand was pressed against his forehead.

They were sitting at the table, rice balls and miso soup in front of them. Tohru's plates were almost clean while Kyo ahd barely touched his. Usually he would be finished long before her.

"Are you feeling okay? You've just been holding your rice ball without eating it."

Kyo flushed and Tohru leaned closer, "Your cheeks look red...could you be getting a fever?"

Her eyes were incredibly blue this close and Kyo couldn't help but stare, just a little.

Tohru caught his eyes and quickly sat back down on her heels, her own cheeks a little flushed. They both looked at anything but the other as the atmosphere was suddenly awkward.

"Um, Kyo, is something the matter?"

Kyo shook his head quickly, "Nothing, nothing at all."

Without anything else being said, they went their separate ways, neither caring to explain exactly why they were blushing.

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Author's note: Far too long since the last update as always, but thanks for sticking with me and this story anyway! I have the next three chapters completely written (just need to be edited before uploading) and the rest drafted so I promise to continue, no matter how long it takes.

Thanks again for reading and all reviews are very much appreciated!

Just wanted to ask my readers how they feel about the use of Japanese in fanfics? I generally try to avoid it as it is often overused/incorrectly used in fanfics. However, there are certain things that don't translate very well such as, for example, kotatsu tables – a small coffee table with a fitted blanket and heating element underneath it, often used in traditional Japanese houses. I imagine that a lot of readers will have seen these kinds of things in the anime/manga, but I wanted to ask how you feel about their use in fanfics? Should I provide an explanation for things such as these?

Please let me know, thanks!

Individual thanks to reviewers below:

Fading Noctis – Thank you very much for taking the time to review each chapter and sorry that it took so long to update – hope you enjoy it!

Serena Scarlet – Thank you for reviewing again! And no problem about being mentioned – you took the time to give me some feedback so the least I can do is say thank you and try to update more regularly in future! Hopefully see you again before long!

Hatake Kai – Thanks for reading and reviewing and sorry that my update rate is rather sporadic!

Racquella – Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it but hope that you don't get in trouble for reading it in class!

Kazumi-with-blue-wings – Happy you enjoyed it and sorry that it took so long to update – more coming as soon as possible!

Love-to-write-01 – Thank you and I'm glad you are enjoying the story so far. I will keep writing even if it takes me forever!

XpeanutButterX – Will try to update more often – happy you enjoyed it!

xcatloverx – Thank you – glad that this story has become one of your favourites despite me being terrible at updating – more coming soon! (P.s - had to remove the dot in your name as this website kept deleting your entire name? Weird, huh?)

Thanks again to everyone for reading and hope to see you all again soon for chapter 5!

Chrikaru