Title: Be Fine

Author: Sparklehunter

Warnings: Light shounen-ai, sequel to "Ways to Die" and "Expendable" and "Miracle"

Summary: Iruka's trying to make himself believe he's okay, but real life keeps intruding.

Author's Note: Fourth in a series of snapshots about the aftermath of an almost-death. Review if you want more? Review anyway? Sankyu!

Be Fine

by sparklehunter

"I'll be fine," Iruka says.

His voice is raspy from disuse, and he moves his hand – the one not strapped to a board – toward his glass of water. Naruto makes an oh my god sound and grabs the glass. Iruka grinds his teeth, but lets the boy press the straw to his mouth.

He's still in the hospital – they're both still in the hospital, but Kakashi's snuck out so Iruka can talk to Naruto in private – but he no longer hears the whine of electronics keeping track of his heartbeat and breathing and brain-waves. Tsunade's decided he's going to survive – really survive, now, not relapse to the death he should have experienced – so Kakashi and he have their beds flush against each other, and they take turns downplaying their injuries and fussing over each other's wounds.

At least, Kakashi downplays his injuries. Since Iruka discovered his paralysis, he hasn't spoken a word about his wounds. When Kakashi or Tsunade or Naruto try to discuss the injuries, he changes the subject. He knows this worries Kakashi, but he can't bring himself to think about his spine and the effects. He doesn't know how he's going to live, now that he can't work with Kakashi and the other shinobi, because being a shinobi is his life, and whoever heard of a paralyzed ninja?

Naruto's glaring at him and ranting about acceptance and being hurt. It sounds like he's been talking to the shrink Tsunade's planning on sending Iruka to see, so Iruka sighs and touches Naruto's hand to silence him.

"I'll be fine," Iruka says.

Naruto doesn't really believe him, and Iruka can't blame him. He doesn't believe it himself.

The boy sees him wince away from the thought, and reaches for the morphine pump, and Iruka bites his lip bloody to keep from screaming stop doing for me I can do this I can dammit I'm not an invalid! But he is an invalid, so he says nothing, just pushes the pump away and shakes his head. Naruto frowns.

Kakashi limps in, then, and Iruka is grateful, because the taller ninja tosses him a can of soda before collapsing onto the bed and moaning about demonic nurses chasing him. Iruka moves to open the bottle, but Naruto snatches it up, and Iruka's temper flares because that legendary patience Kakashi's always talking about (and Iruka has no idea what Kakashi's talking about, he knows he has no patience whatsoever, just too much compassion for troublemakers) is gone, and he sees red. He opens his mouth to snap at Naruto, but Kakashi beats him to it, and tells Naruto that Iruka can open his own soda, even one handed.

I'll be fine, Iruka thinks, as he opens his can of soda. But he spills some on the sheets by accident, not used to working left handed, and he doubts.