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Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans so lets not try and sue me since I don't have anything to sue for.

Trying To Do the Right Thing

By: Finalitylife

The problem that I faced at this moment was unlike anything I thought I would ever face and I knew that its solution would change things greatly. This problem was something that I had tried so hard to avoid but I couldn't maintain indifference toward my friends. It was in my nature to try and help people when they had problems and it was that fact that probaly put me in this situation. Batman always taught me that emotions were a weakness and that people you cared about could be used against you. I said I understood what he said yet I still formed a team with people that I now cared very deeply for and exactly what Batman had meant was proven a horrible reality when Slade made me his apprentice. My friends lives were threatened because of me, they were used to make me what I always feared I would become. I was forced to hurt them physically and emotionally to protect them.

After the whole ordeal, I vowed I would never allow something like that to happen again. I told myself that I would have to distance myself from them more so that no one else would see just how much I cared for them, so no one else could use them as Slade did. However, I couldn't do it. I couldn't completely push them away and I continued to try and make them all happy, to let them know how I cared for them. I realized that I had gotten too close and could never live without them by my side and I accepted that eventually but I also decided I would never get any closer to them than I already was.

I sit in my room mulling over what I should do. I did not want to do what I was going to do but it needed to be done though I was still having trouble finding the correct words. In reality, I highly doubted that there were correct words for this. How does one tell two women that the feelings they feel for him can never be returned. That no matter how much they cared, it would always be unrequited love because duty would always override emotion. Starfire would be much easier. It was no secret that the beautiful, bubbly Tamaranian princess had a crush on me.

Anyone with half a brain could see that. I always played it off as if I didn't know, that I didn't notice her desire to be by me constantly, how she got jealous of Kitten when I was forced to go on a date with her. I pleaded ignorance, trying not to encourage whatever fantasy she had concocted in her head though maybe it was my fault for always spending time with her, feeling obligated to teach her the ways of Earth.

I knew that it was only a matter of time before she would confess her undying love for me and I decided that I would talk to her before she got the chance. I would have to sit her down and shatter her kind, gentle heart. I did not want to do it but I knew the sooner she knew the truth, the sooner she could move on. I knew Starfire well and I knew that she would be very sad for awhile but would recover. I knew that eventually her feelings would transfer to someone else and she would be just as happy with that person as she thought she would have been with me. Starfire would always find a way to be happy and that was perhaps her greatest gift. Despite all that, I still knew the look in her eyes when I told her we would never be together would probably haunt me for years to come. I would be a monster if I could hurt the most pure and innocent being in the universe and not feel bad about it. I let out a deep sigh. Starfire was the minor problem in all this. She was nothing compared to what I knew would come with dealing with Raven.

I'm still not entirely sure when it started or rather how it even started but one day I simply noticed her giving me looks. It would be out of the corner of my eye and I'm sure if I didn't wear a mask it would never had occurred because Raven couldn't tell I was looking at her, but I saw it. She would sit quietly on the couch, reading her large books that managed to make her look even smaller but she was never reading entirely. I would catch her glancing up every so often at me and then her eyes would quickly dart back to the book as if nothing had happened.

For a while, I paid no attention to it but even I couldn't ignore them when they started increasing in number and would occasionally be accompanied with a small blush. Once again it was probably my fault that the emotions started. I was always asking her how she was doing and trying to get her to be more open. I tried to make my friend feel better and tried to get to know her better. Sometimes I wish I could deny my nature of helping people but I can't, especially when I consider them friends.

I knew it was getting worse when she would start meditating in the training room while I worked out. I could feel her eyes on me as I trained and it was slightly unnerving. I would always ask her why she was there and not the roof and her reply would be its too hot outside. I would ask her why she wasn't in her room and she would tell me she needed to get out of her room for a little bit. I would never get any more words from her other than that.

Finally, it was when she entered into my mind to save me from Slade that I finally knew the truth. Raven, the dark, emotionless girl who always said feelings were pointless, had fallen in love with me. Maybe it was intentional by her, maybe it was the only was she could try and tell me her feelings, but when she entered my mind, she created a bond between us. Through that bond, I was able to pick up on some of her emotions, the emotions she felt for me. The love she had for me, the happiness that coursed through her every time I was near her.

The bond also allowed me to catch glimpses of her dreams, well the better word to describe them would be fantasies. I never thought Raven would dream what she did. I was sure Starfire's fantasies consisted of holding hands and moonlight walks but Raven's were far different than I could have ever believed would come from the reserved, quiet young woman. They do say it's always the quiet ones and I could feel myself slightly blush as I thought back to what I saw. Raven's fantasies were passionate and intense, full of a cascade of emotions that she probably had never felt before. They had an animalistic quality to them. Raven wanted me, Raven needed me, Raven had a hunger for me. She dreamed of us intertwined in a sweating, panting embrace over and over again. I'd be lying if I said I didn't find some enjoyment in seeing them. I was a guy after all but I knew I shouldn't think like that. I could not allow myself to be tempted in any way. It would just make it harder to tell her just like I would tell Starfire, that we would never be together.

I dreaded telling Raven the truth far more than Starfire. I did not know what her reaction would be. Raven may appear as the strong one, the tough one to everyone who saw her but she was indeed the most fragile member of our team. Her inexperience and repression of her emotions for so long made her especially susceptible to emotional suffering and I couldn't even fathom what the truth would do to her.

Would she breakdown and cry? Would the Tower blow up? Would she get angry and banish me to some far off, dark dimension? I wasn't sure if I would survive my encounter with her.

However, I knew I had to tell her. If I allowed it to continue, she would only feel stronger and stronger for me as time went on which would only make her reaction that much worse. It was best to reveal the truth as soon as possible and there was no time like the present. I forced myself to my feet, despite protests from both the emotional and logical parts of my mind but I ignored them. I was set in my path. I would not allow anyone to get any closer to me. I would not allow Starfire or Raven to be singled out as the best target to get at me because I was with them. I would protect them even if it meant breaking their hearts.

I walked out of my room into the dark hallway. It was nearly midnight and I was sure all the titans were not in bed, well except for Raven. Like me, she had a tendency to be up at all hours of the night so more than likely she was still awake. I kind of knew she was awake because I was sure that if she was asleep, my mind would have been assaulted by visions of intertwined bodies and moaning. I walked slower than I usually did, being in no rush to do what I was going to do. This was going to be the hardest thing I had ever done but I knew it was the right thing. I now found myself standing in front of the cold, steel door of Raven's room. I could feel her inside her room through our link and I was fairly positive she knew I was there as well. I knocked on the door and waited for her to answer it. I heard her cloak swooshing as she walked toward the door. It slid open slightly and I could see two large, purple eyes staring at me from the darkness. Her voice was emotionless but I knew she was simply hiding what she felt.

"Yes Robin?" I wanted to give her a grin or a smile or something but I kept my face blank.

"I would like to talk to you about something Raven, something important." Some unidentifiable emotion flashed in her eyes for a brief moment then was gone.

"Fine. Come in." The door slid open all the way as Raven walked back into her room leaving me at the door. "Close the door after you come in." I nodded and entered into the darkness. Her room had a gothic style to it and most people would have considered it freaky but it had a quiet beauty to it, just like Raven. I pushed those thought to the back of my mind as I continued to take in my surroundings. Raven sat down on her bed and pulled off her hood revealing her face entirely to me. She motioned for me to sit next to her but I shook my head.

"Thank you but I prefer to stand." She gave me a strange look but did not press it.

"So what is it you want to talk to me about Robin." I let out a deep sigh.

"Whether you are aware of this or not, but ever since you entered my mind, a kind of bond has formed between us. I can feel your emotions and I can see your dreams." Raven simply nodded as I spoke, not looking surprised or shocked in the least which pretty much confirmed by belief that she knew about it already and probably created the bond on purpose.

"Because of that fact, I became aware of some of your feelings, most specifically those regarding me, and it did confirm something that I had already suspected."

"And what is that Robin?" Her voice was quiet though still monotone and emotionless. I looked at her noticing that she was staring directly at me.

"That…that you are in love with me." I stared at her as she continued to stare at me. The room was silent for a few seconds before she looked away, turning her head so that she was no longer looking at me. Her voice came out shaky and almost scared sounding. It wasn't something that I was used to hearing from her.

"I'm sorry Robin. I formed the bond because it was the only way I could truly let you know how I felt. I've tried to deny my feelings, I've tired to ignore what my heart tells me is true, but I just can't." Again she looked at me.

"I love you Robin. I love you so much." I could feel emotions radiating off of her and I knew that what she said was entirely true. I simply stood there, blank expression on my face as Raven looked at me with hope in her eyes, waiting for me to respond. I willed my heart to stone as I knew I was going to crush that hope.

"That's why I've come to talk with you Raven. I've come to tell you that I can't return those feelings. I've come to tell you that you are a dear friend to me and that you should stop wasting time desiring something that will never happen." My voice was cold and blunt. It was easier if I stayed completely detached, left no room for misinterpretation. Even when her eyes started glossing over with tears waiting to fall and her heart breaking into a million pieces, I continued to stand there with no expression. Eventually she dropped her head down as if in shame and I was pretty sure she had started crying by the sound of her voice.

"Its Starfire isn't it. It's because you want her. I should have known that would happen. Who would want someone who is creepy and ugly when they could have her." My mind cringed as she berated herself but I held firm even when something behind me blew up.

"No. Starfire has nothing to do with this. I simply will not allow myself to get any closer to you than I already am and want you to forget about whatever you feel for me. It is for your own good as well as for the good of the team. I'm sure you will understand eventually and realize this is all for the best." A nearby statue shattered as Raven began openly crying. I wanted to run over and comfort her but I remained where I was at as she cried. I just told her to cut out her heart and I was sure that any sudden movement would result in bodily harm. Something else in the room exploded as she looked up with a look of anger in her eyes. I could feel whatever bond we had instantly disappear as her piercing gaze settled on me. Her voice was low and filled with rage.

"Get out. Get out now Robin." I'd be lying if I said the look on her face didn't scare me. With no other word, I simply turned around and let myself out the room. The door closed behind me and I found myself standing there for a few seconds as I listened to Raven crying in her room, crying because of me. I could hear her talking to herself as she sobbed and she kept saying the same thing over and over again.

"This can't be happening. Why won't I wake up from my nightmare?" Her voice was almost painful to listen to and I eventually willed myself to walk away. I kept telling myself it was all for the best and Raven would eventually realize I was doing it because I cared about her safety and wellbeing but I was having a very difficult time convincing myself of that fact. I found myself back at my room and opened it to reveal total destruction. Apparently, Raven's powers had lashed out at my room, destroying everything. A small part of my brain told me that I deserved this as I walked through the debris toward the one surviving piece of furniture, my bed. I dropped on to the bed hoping to fall asleep though sleep would not come for me. I could still hear Raven crying in my mind and I knew it would haunt me just as Starfire's tears would after I talked with her tomorrow.

In her room, Raven was curled up in a small ball on her bed as she continued to shake and cry. All she wanted to do was fade away, to leave this existence behind and embrace nothingness. She was absolutely devastated and it felt like her heart had disappeared. She would have given him everything. She would have loved him forever but he said it would never be. The only thing that was keeping her going right now was the simple fact of what Robin hadn't said. He said he couldn't return her feelings. He said he was doing this for her own good and for the good of the team. He said to forget about her emotions for him. However, never once did he say he didn't love her. He never once said he didn't, he only said he couldn't. A small sliver of hope burned deep within Raven, just enough to keep her from embracing the darkness. It would have to do for now. The smallest of smiles formed on Raven's face though it was only for an instant. It was only a few seconds later that she was asleep, dreamless, but peaceful.