M-d: Hello everyone.

Hiei: Hi!

M-d: What's with you?

Hiei: I don't know.

M-d: O…kay…

Hiei: Enjoy! .

A black clad figure sat silently on the park bench, reminiscing in his own thoughts.

Why had he been born? Why? It seemed to have no other purpose than to be destroyed. That's right. Hiei, the fierce warrior of the Makai, was starting to crumble under all the weight on his soul.

He sat up on the steel bench and tried to solve his predicament.

He let out a small sigh.

He could feel it within him. He had broken. His whole life he had been shunned, beaten, ignored, and yes…. even raped. One soul could not handle it all.

When he had been young, before he had forced to hide it all from everyone, he had been sweet and innocent. That was impossible now. Inside he was still that person who didn't want to harm or give a cold look. But, life had changed that outer look to the opposite of his birth. To a cold killer.

What could he do? He wasn't about to show his teammates that he was different than they believed. It wouldn't go too well. The last thing he needed right now was his only friends to leave him. He friends.

He stood from his seat and turned his gaze to the sky. It was going to rain again. Last night he hadn't hidden from it in shelter, he knew he was too weak to hold himself together the whole night. He had almost cried.

He shivered.

Nothing made sense anymore to him. At least not the way it had made sense before he met the group.

Before he met them it was that he would receive nothing, no shelter, anything.

And then he met them and in a snap he was given things without payment expected in return. He was given shelter just because they didn't want him to become ill or hurt.

Hiei found himself walking the path to Kurama's home.

Kurama.

He couldn't believe it, but he found himself falling deeply for this fox. It hurt him. It hurt him to know that no matter what he did, a person as perfect as Kurama would never think of loving the Forbidden Child. And knowing that he was in so much pain every time he was near the fox. Every time that kitsune gave him a smile or shelter it made the Koorime want to run away and scream to the Gods for making go through the torture of a loveless life.

The demon snapped out of his thoughts and realized he had brought himself to the tree outside Kurama's window. His eyes widened. His thoughts had carried him here.

The rain started on him in a down poor. He sighed. Tonight he wasn't in the mood for crying in the rain.

Lightly he tapped on the window. He looked at his small hand to find it shaking. His emotions were out of control. The more he bottled them up, the more he shook on the outside.

He saw Kurama notice him and walk gracefully over to the window and give him a big smile as he opened the window for him to enter. Hiei landed softly on the carpet and sighed within himself.

He had to keep himself together tonight. He was the child who wasn't allowed to cry. To love. He wouldn't cry. He wasn't….allowed.

He slowly removed his cloak and boots and left them at the window and took a seat on Kurama's comfortable bed.

Kurama smiled at him and took his seat at his homework desk, then turned the chair to face him.

"How have you been Hiei?" He asked politely.

"…Fine." Hiei said. It wasn't what he wanted to say, but it seemed natural for him to say so. Not wanting others to worry over him.

"Are you hungry?" Kurama asked. He already knew the answer, but he wanted to ask first.

No response.

"I'll go get us some sweet snow." The kitsune announced as he left the room to prepare their snack.

Damn it. The fox knew him well. Why did he have to love him? Why did he have to fall into God's trap against him?

He heard footsteps approach and looked up to see Kurama handing him a bowl and a spoon. He took the item and watched as the kitsune sat beside him on the bed to enjoy their treat.

Hiei looked at the bowl for a few moments before he slowly ate a small bite.

"Are you okay Hiei? You look, different. Are you sick?" Kurama asked. He noticed Hiei's hands were a little shaky. He placed his own bowl on the night stand and pressed his hand on Hiei's forehead to check for fever.

"You're burning up! I'll be right back." He said as he went downstairs to get some blankets. Why hadn't Hiei told him he was feeling ill? He normally wouldn't, but it would've been nice for once. He reached the closet and picked out a few white blankets to keep the fire demon warm.

He walked back to Hiei and softly placed them around his small shoulders. He opened a drawer and pulled out his handy dandy thermometer.

"Hold this under your tongue Hiei. It's just going to tell me your body temperature." He gave Hiei the device and he did as told, placing it in his mouth without argument.

Hiei felt a large pang in his chest. Why did he do this to him? Why did he give him comfort and warmth? He was the Forbidden Child! He felt his eyes grow warm and took a deep breath.

Not now. You can't cry. You….are never allowed….never.

Kurama watched Hiei carefully. Something was terribly wrong. Hiei was trying to hide it. He could see it in his figure. The way he moved. He couldn't stand to see his Hiei like this. Yes, he had grown feelings for the small fire demon. Ever since they had first met. Yet a demon who never showed emotion would never love a person like him, it couldn't happen.

Kurama gently pulled the thermometer out of Hiei's grip. He tisk-ed.

"You have quite a fever the-" He looked up to Hiei's face and saw it. He saw sadness he had never seen before.

"Hiei.." He almost whispered the word. "What's wrong?"

At this point the had forgotten about thesmall illnessand crept behind the demon on the bed, placing his arms lovingly around the other.

"Whatever it is…it's alright Hiei. I'm here if you want to talk." Kurama spoke into Hiei's back as he tried to comfort him.

Hiei felt another pang in his chest - it hurt more than before. He eyes grew warm again. He couldn't stop himself this time. It was too much.

"You don't have to hide your pain Hiei. I'm here for you."

His mind shouted for Kurama to stop. Every comfort he gave hurt him more. Reminded him of something he could never have.

" You're allowed to cry here."

His breath shook.

He…was…allowed to…cry..?

"I…..I am?" He whispered shakily.

"Of course Hiei."

The tears broke through. He couldn't stop them anymore. He felt them roll down his face and crystalize in his lap.

His crying turned to sobs.

All the while Kurama was there.

Holding him.

Telling him everything would be fine.

Letting him cry.

M-d: I can't continue right now… I'm crying.