Chapter 1

Saturday, September 6, 1997

Jeff was staring off out over the ocean when Bogg finally found him. He had been crying almost non-stop since the Princess' funeral and showed little sign of stopping anytime soon.

"There had to be another way, Bogg!" he shouted as his friend approached. "This shouldn't have happened! We could have stopped her..." This was the first time their new Omni sent them On Assignment outside of the set boundary of 1982, and the first time Jeff had Omnied into what should have been his future. As the tears slowed, Jeff's anger surfaced anew, having brought up the memories of his parents death. It also didn't help that he was now 14 years old and trying desperately to be more in control of his emotions.

The frightened child and the angry young adult converged and let Phineas have it with both barrels. "I thought we were supposed to protect people Bogg, not let them die! She was a mother, she was beautiful... She was just beginning to be happy again and now this! Why didn't you go with them? Why did you let Henri drive the car? Or why didn't you and Dodi's chauffeur divert the reporters' attention? Do you know how hard it was to look William in the face, knowing I could have prevented his mother's death? Do you? No, you don't! You can't possibly know how it feels because you've never lost your parents!"

Bogg winced at the razor-sharp words as Jeff ranted on. "Why'd that stupid Omni of yours bring us here, anyway? Didn't HQ set it so we wouldn't get any assignments past 1982 because we didn't want a guidebook? I know nothing about 1997 without a guidebook! Now, 1982 or before, piece of cake! Jeeze Bogg, I'm supposed to be 27 years old in 1997! If I'd have known this history, I would have..."

"Done exactly what we did," Bogg finished. Jeff glared at him as he continued. "That's why we have the Omni—to make sure things are right even if we think they aren't. History is history, whether we like the outcome or not. You know we can't change it to suit our needs. And how do you think I felt when I got the news of their death...knowing I had to let Diana and Dodi go off that night without me? I was their bodyguard for God's sake! I headed to the car and the Omni went red, so I told Trevor to go ahead without me and WHAM: Green light. And then they were chased by the press and crashed... how do you think I felt?" 'Like hell', he thought. 'But what could I have done to save them… or myself? My God, I could have died...'

This was not the first time that thought had occurred to him; in fact it haunted him daily. But at this moment, with Jeff's grief so close, it had never been more real… or terrifying. He took a deep breath to calm himself before continuing, "Look, I know as much about 1997 as you do kid. And we went over this back in July when we got here: The only reason I can still see for us ending up here is that The Council needed us to be here. Given the circumstances do you really think anyone else could have helped the Princes the way you have?"

Jeff shook his head. He'd been with Harry and William when Charles came and told them the news of their mother's death. "I guess my experience was worth something if it means I helped them through this," Jeff said forlornly. "When my parents died, no one really understood how I felt. Like Harry and William, I was angry, confused, hurt, depressed..."

"And another thing," Phineas continued, "I didn't let anything happen. I got a red light so I stayed behind. Do you think I've enjoyed this anymore than you have?"

He knelt down beside Jeff, put both hands on his shoulders and looked him square in the eyes. "I know this hurts. Believe me, I know. I wish it didn't have to be this way, Jeff, but we are Voyagers and we need to keep history the way it's supposed to be. We don't have to understand it, just accept it. As much as it sickens me to say it kid, she had to die."

Jeff was quiet for a moment as he took it all in, then heaved a heavy sigh, "Let's get out of here, Bogg. I need to be far away from this place. I don't want to remember..."

"You got it, kid." Bogg interrupted him mid-sentence. "And I know just the place." Jeff looked at him quizzically, but Bogg only smiled. "Trust me, you'll love it! It'll be just the place for us to unwind and relax." He set the Omni coordinates two weeks from the current date, entered the destination and pressed the button.

A moment later, they landed at the front gate of a ranch. As they got up and dusted themselves off, Jeff looked around to get his bearings. Bogg walked through the gate and headed toward the house with Jeff close behind him.

"Bogg? Where are we?"

"Texas. September 20th, 1997. Green Light."

Jeff looked at the ranch house and then he knew: They were at Tracy's ranch! Tracy was a classmate of Phineas' who had ended up helping Jeff save Bogg from a renegade Voyager who was bent on destroying Real History for her own pleasure.

She was now on assignment in Texas since May of 1996, and had been there for over a standard Linear Year helping the Boyd family keep their ranch in the family. As part of the assignment, she had ended up buying the ranch and was now in the process of transferring ownership back to the brothers, Kirk and Matt. She and Bogg had become rather close when they 'saved the world' and so the Voyager Council had made sure that Bogg's new Omni would send them to Tracy's assignment, since they would stop by from time to time between their own assignments.

"I can't wait to see the puppies again," Jeff said excitedly. He and Simon Boyd, Kirk's son, had found 2 newborn pups abandoned by the river the first time he and Bogg had been to the Ranch.

"For the last time Jeffrey: they're not puppies anymore! They were nine months old when we were here in April 1997 and they weren't little then!"

Just then he saw two large Golden Retrievers running towards them. "Bogg, look! They're HUGE!"

As she finished cooking supper, Tracy heard the dogs start to bark excitedly and then take off running down the road to the main gate. She went to the window and her heart leaped for joy.

"Jeff and Phineas are back!" She cried. "Matt set two more spots at the table for dinner!" When she got to them, Katie was jumping all over Phineas and had knocked him to the ground. Bo had attacked Jeff with the same reckless abandon and both dogs were showering them with big wet kisses. Tracy stood there laughing at the sight.

"Enough, girl!" Bogg said through the onslaught of love. "Katie, sit!" She immediately sat, still on top of him, and continued to lick him. Phineas shielded his face and hollered, to no avail. He finally gave Katie a shove and said, "Sit!" Again, Katie sat, looking at him as if to say, "Didn't I do that before?"

"Good girl!" Bogg said as he rubbed her head.

Having learned from Bogg's mistake, Jeff pushed Bo off of him before giving him the same command and said with a smile, "I didn't think you could ever get a girl to listen to you Bogg!"

"She's just gotta be the right girl," he said.

"Don't I listen well?" Tracy asked as she came up and gave him a big hug.

Phineas returned the hug with a grin. "Only when you want to, my dear," he said, and gave her a kiss.

Seeing Bogg and Tracy together again made Jeff smile. 'One big, happy family' ...The train of thought took off before he could stop it: His parent's mangled car, their funeral, Diana's car, William and Harry, Diana's funeral...

Bo sensed a change in his boy and whimpered. Tracy turned and saw the look on Jeff's face. "Jeff? Jeff, honey, what's wrong?" Bogg opened his mouth to tell her but was cut off by Jeff's headlong dash into Tracy's arms. Bo was next to him in an instant and Katie looked up at Bogg and whined.

"It's OK, girl," he said sadly as he rubbed her head, "we've just had a rough week." She pushed her muzzle into his hand and licked it as if to say, 'it'll be ok'.

Tracy looked over Jeff's head to Bogg and mouthed the words, "What happened?"

He shook his head as they went into the house. "It's a long story," he said, his voice husky with emotion.

Once inside, Tracy sent them into the front room and went back to the dining room where the Boyds and the ranch hands were gathering for dinner. "Save us a plate of something, guys. I don't know what happened, but Phineas and Jeff need me right now."

"Yes, ma'am," Matt said. "You go take care of them, and we'll be just fine in here."

"Jeff's here? Is he OK?" Simon was on his feet and moving to the front room to see his friend when his dad stopped him.

"Later son. Let Miss Tracy spend some time with them right now." Simon started to respond but Kirk stood firm, "No, I mean it. Sit down, and if he needs you, Miss Tracy will let you know. Just give them some space for now."

Back in the front room, Phineas filled Tracy in on their assignment, and gave her all the details of the past few weeks. The whole world had been rocked by the senseless loss, and Tracy had secretly thought of using her Omni to go back and 'make things right' if she didn't already have a red light on her current assignment. Like Jeff, who was holding on to her like a security blanket, she had a hard time believing Diana was supposed to die. She rubbed his shoulder absently as she took it all in.

"Are you sure you had a green light to stay behind? Couldn't it have been..." she trailed off, seeing the painful answer in his eyes. She knew that Phineas Bogg would not make that kind of mistake. Her heart broke for the both of them, especially Jeff.

Now that he was here, Jeff felt safe. The entire ordeal had left him feeling like a rag doll, and as he listened to the adults talk, he fell into an exhausted sleep in Tracy's arms. Bogg carried him into the guestroom and laid him down on the bed. Tracy covered him and kissed his cheek, "My poor boy," she whispered, and crept out of the room.

Back in the front room Phineas collapsed on the couch, the stress of the past week clearly etched on his face. Tracy curled up next to him and wrapped her arms around him.

"Phineas, you don't have to be strong anymore. Jeff's asleep and we are alone. The others have eaten and have explicit instructions not to bother us." Bogg just stared at the fireplace. Tracy looked deeply into his blue eyes, seeing only pain. She tried again.

"Please Phineas. Please talk to me."

He didn't respond, and she let it rest. 'Sometimes', she thought, 'just being with someone is enough'. After 10 minutes of sitting in silence, she looked up to see if he was even still awake. His eyes were filled with tears.

"It's OK," she whispered. "Let it go." Those three simple words were like a sledgehammer hitting a wall, releasing all the emotion he'd held inside for a week.

He had cried with Jeff and the young princes, but even then he'd had to be strong. This wound was different, deeper. Having gone outside of Jeff's realm of expertise without a guidebook, they consequently came to a point in time where their voyage was to insure a green light by someone's death. What made it so difficult was that they had gotten to know Diana personally; her boys were right around Jeff's age and they had become friends. Bogg remembered the struggle Jeff had with letting the Titanic follow its historic course, but Jeff didn't know those people like he knew the Princes or their mother. And even if they had known it would happen going into the assignment, it wouldn't have made it any easier. It was still a circumstance Bogg had not considered talking about with Jeff yet… and now it was too late.

"He blames me...for what...happened...back there," he was finally able to get out in ragged breaths. Tracy held him as he cried. "How was I sup—supposed to know she … she had to die?" He tried to regain control before going on. "He kept asking me… 'Why did they send us to my future? Wasn't the Omni supposed to stop at 1982? Why didn't they send us a guidebook or a note?' I told him that HQ must have felt we were the best team for the job, but a little bit of warning would have been nice! My God, Tracy, you should have seen Jeff last week, I was so proud of him: trying so hard to hold it together for William and Harry and fighting his own demons too. And I felt responsible for it all. I know I didn't send us to that assignment, but I still feel like I bear some responsibility for his suffering."

"But Phineas, you didn't know..."

"That's not the point!" He said loudly. She fell silent and listened. "Do you know what he asked me after the funeral? He asked me if I knew how it felt, looking at William, knowing he could have saved his mom."

"What did you say?"

"Nothing, what could I say? Then he said, 'No, you don't because you've never lost your parents!' "

Bogg curled up on the couch with his head in Tracy's lap, and she stroked his hair. He turned to look up at her. "He's right. I've never lost anyone close to me. I don't know how it feels. I tried to comfort him, and all I did was make him feel worse. I never should have let us stay there..." he trailed off as his eyes filled with tears.

Tracy was at a loss for words.'What can I say? 'It'll be OK?' 'Jeff doesn't really blame you?' She wanted to take away his pain but didn't know how or where to start. So she did the only thing she could do: sat there and held him.