Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars, any of the characters... you get the picture.
This is just another little Star Wars one-shot I made up. It's from Padme's POV. Just some random fluff... don't expect much.
Waiting
I would pace about the hall, back and forth, back and forth, the servants growing suspicious of my moods. C3PO would stare at me, robotic eyes following as I shook and calmed myself down. Eventually, I'd stop enough to enclose myself within my room. Yet then I paced the balcony until my feet wore marks into the stone.
Perhaps it was the tension of growing unrest in the senate. That was how I answered the servants' inquiries. But the two robots that followed me everywhere knew. Yet with their knowledge, they did nothing to save me from my constant worry. It grew upon my mind; the secret, I knew, would break out in time. But if he returned, I would be able to find comfort in something other than worry.
There were times when I felt like screaming, tearing every head off its shoulders. So much as a simple greeting would send my temper to unmanageable heights.
How I wished I would break! How I longed for the freedom to speak my mind, to let everyone know how I felt! I desired nothing more than to shout, "I love Anakin Skywalker!" to the entire world, to tell anyone that would listen that I bore his child. But he would never forgive me, and I would die without his love.
I awaited him every day and night, or at least for news that he was well. Anything but the silence I received. Why was I forced to keep us secret? Why did I have to cloak the growing child within me? Why did I have to pretend to be ashamed?
Had I not loved Anakin so much, I would have hated him for what he had done to me. To impregnate me, then leave and let me worry every second of him? To force me to keep all secret, and sit alone, unable to speak of my worries and be consoled? Had he been there, he would have kissed me until I forgot all but his sweet breath and his love.But he wasn't here, wasn't standing beside me, a force of love holding me up.
Yet when he returned, there was something different about him. Some air of dignity that I could not help but notice. I didn't like it, but even with the flaws, I loved him. He was the chosen one, the greatest of all great, and he did not take commands. No, the chosen one would give them. All would obey him. The world would kneel at his feet.
I recall a time when we were immortal, young. When we walked the moonlit gardens by the palace and felt nothing but the beating of each other's hearts. When the prick of a thorn, a bleeding wound did not escape us, but rather delighted us, for we were in love.
There was never a moment when I doubted Anakin's favour. Not for a moment did my thoughts linger on his love. There was no need to prove it; I saw in his eyes, and it gave me strength.
I loved him, even when he turned into the monster he had never wished to be. I loved him, though it was because of he that I perished. I loved him, so fully, so entirely, even when our family was ripped apart at his doing. I would love him forever, for love went beyond time, beyond all years that any universe could hold. I would love him when the world died in pain, screamed for mercy because of him. I would love him, with the last drops of blood falling from his dagger's wound, even as he laughed at my suffering.
If any inquire now, I answer simply: I loved a man once, and he killed me. I love him now, but he cannot hurt me any more. There is nothing left but happiness.
He will join me someday, and we will truly be immortal. We will be young, in love, and we will have all eternity to walk the moonlit gardens of Naboo.
Was it my fate, my curse? I had waited for him ever in living, and now, without breath I awaited his soul? Was this the curse love laid upon me, for loving a villain? For bearing his children to misery? I wanted nothing more than to feel him, taste him, and know that he had been waiting for me.