Disclaimer: I don't own any of Rumiko Takahashi's characters…which is pretty sad

A/N: So…this is it, our…er…my first fanfic. YAY! I'm uber nervous. Please don't flame I might cry. I guess constructive criticism is welcome…just don't be harsh…please. OK YAY!

Cigarettes and Lavender

Chapter 1-He Wanted More from Life

Bi Polar

It's the kind of feeling you get when all you want to do is curl up in a small ball and hide under a rock. That feeling was unbearably familiar for him. He had been sitting on the floor of his bedroom "doing his homework" for over 3 hours now. Of course, all of his papers were blank. The yelling of his parents could be heard downstairs. Inuyasha Takashi let out a tired sigh, getting up only to collapse on his bed putting a pillow over his head, trying to drown out the screams of his mother and the shouts of his father.

On nights like this he'd often climb out his window and walk down the street as far as he could get from his home, away from the fighting. He didn't know why he didn't use the door, its not like they would notice or even care. Somehow using the window seemed like a more rebellious thing to do, it seemed like he was trying to make a statement or something outlandish like that. Maybe he just liked windows more than he did doors. Well, whatever the reason he left that night too, crawling out the small window and down the gutter, silently walking down the streets with his hands in his pockets. He pulled out a small grey package, took out a cigarette and putting it to his mouth. It relieved his stress; they had been doing so for 3 or 4 years now.

It had been like this for quite some time now. Inuyasha couldn't remember a time when his parents got along. He began to wonder if they ever got along. Taking a sharp turn he entered the park. It was always sort of disturbing here at night, but it suited Inuyasha perfectly. It was quiet enough to think and peaceful enough to get away. He didn't know how long he sat there, wearing a watch was never Inuyasha's style. When he got home it was 3 in the morning, his parents had finally settled down.

Alarms are useless things; all they do is make a bothersome noise when most people would rather hear silence. Then again, Inuyasha would rather hear his alarm clock beeping then his parents' arguing.

Walking to school was easier than being there. He liked the calm stillness of the morning, school was the opposite. Everyone was always in a rush like they would die if they didn't get to some unknown place in seconds. They were brainless, cruel, and stereotypical.

White walls with the occasional piece of work done by students surrounded him now. He hated this place, he felt so confined and sometimes almost claustrophobic. He'd catch the occasional conversation. Someone named Mimi had a new boyfriend and was excited to go on their weekend date. Haisho thought his girlfriend was cheating on him and was going to ask her after school. Toboi was upset because he was one point away from an A on his Biology test. Some of the conversations made him smile to but most made him feel nothing.

"Today we'll be learning about how sulfuric acids interact with…" Mr. Moshimoto's voice was obscured by the gears turning in Inuyasha's head. His thoughts were elsewhere, in a place where there were no such things as fighting, isolation, and pain. His mind never stopped moving, the thoughts twirled around in there like lottery balls.

"Excuse me; do you have a partner for the project?" Inuyasha looked up wondering why anyone would ask him. In a school as big as this it was hard to get to know anyone, especially when that someone was Inuyasha. He tended to keep to himself, he didn't like crowds and he didn't like useless conversations.

"Hmm…strange." Inuyasha mumbled to himself. He had just noticed the boy's eye color. An extraordinary violet color, they looked somewhat hopeful. The boy with the violet eyes stepped back seemingly frustrated with Inuyasha.

Inuyasha sat there for a moment dumbfounded by the boy's antics. "Uhh…wait!" He said just loud enough for the violet eyed boy to hear. "I don't have a partner…I'm sorry for not answering you." Inuyasha looked down at his desk; he was never too good with talking to people.

"Great! Then you and I can be partners! My name's Miroku." The boy held out his hand in a friendly gesture. Inuyasha shook it with gratitude. He was pleased that this was one project he wouldn't have to do by himself. "Inuyasha." He whispered with a smile on his face. Inuyasha left the class lively.

The rest of his day was uneventful; he ate lunch out on the curb of the parking lot. It was a nice day and he didn't want to be in the cafeteria which was so crowded. Plus, it was a way for him to get away from the plainness of the school walls. He went to all of his classes turned in any homework that he had done, took some notes, but mostly spent his time daydreaming.

Now he was trudging back home, dreading it all the more with every step. He got there in record time. A whole 2 hours wasted walking home when he could probably be there in thirty minutes. They were yelling again. They didn't even acknowledge him when he quietly said "hello" and walked up the stairs, they just continued their argument.

"Inuyasha!" His mother's voice rang upstairs and into his small dark room. "Come downstairs now!" She didn't sound happy, but then again, when did she ever? He walked downstairs with his head down and his face showing no emotion.

"We got your report card today; they sent it to us in the mail." His father started out holding a white piece of paper between his thumb and pointer finger. "You've got two Ds Inuyasha." He said calmly, but anyone who had known him could tell he was about to burst.

"In what classes?" Inuyasha said still without emotion.

"That doesn't matter! You got two Ds! TWO! Damnit Inuyasha, why aren't you working harder? How can we tell you you're a great kid when you can't even pass two easy classes?" He was red in the face now, and a vein in his temple looked as though it was going to pop. Inuyasha internally smiled at the thought.

"Jesus! Great job Sei! You just made him feel like shit! You're one hell of a parent!" Inuyasha's mother was talking now…actually more like screaming. Her face abruptly went from wild to calm as she turned to her son and reached out to touch his shoulder. "Look Inuyasha, all we want is for you to be the best you can be. Just work harder, it's really disappointing to see that you're failing two classes." Her forehead creased as she frowned.

"I'll try." Inuyasha went back upstairs without another word. He closed his eyes halfway up trying to block out his parent's shouts. They came through anyway.

"Thanks a lot Izayoi! You gave me a shit head for a kid! He can't even pass whatever the hell those classes were. God, if he wouldn't have been born then we probably wouldn't be like this!" His father's voice bellowed down the dark hollow hallways and into Inuyasha's ears.

"Oh put a sock in it! You know as well as I do that we would have turned out like this anyway. Inuyasha is just the thing that set us off." Izayoi's high pitched voice bounced off the walls.

"He shouldn't even be here! If you would have listened to me and had just had that fucking abortion none of this stress would have been put on us." Inuyasha winced as his father said this. Of course, he had already heard this several times before but each time it hurt like the first. 'I wish I never would have been born.' He thought. He wondered how many people thought that in a day.

Inuyasha finished his homework relatively early. His parent's shouts had been lowered and to a minimum. He decided to hit the hay early. As he changed he looked at the scars trailing up and down his arms. All from self inflicted wounds, he cringed at the memories. It was his get away for awhile there, his salvation. His life wasn't all that bad when he put it in perspective; he just wanted more from it.