"UWAAAAAAAAA!" Heero's scream echoed. Relena frowned. Heero should realize that i saved him! Now he can love me, not that stupid American boy!
Heero, shaking with grief and rage, picked up the small note next to his friend and lover.
"Heero...sorry...I never loved you. I killed myself because i wanted to go to hell. And...I think relena would make a nice replacement, don't you think so too, Heero? See-ya! The Late Duo Maxwell."
Heero blinked, and jumped as Relena spoke. "Oh Heero, you must be so sad! Let me make it better." Walking over, Relena hugged Heero from behind. Heero just shook.
"Why...why would he...?"
Relena tsked. "He just realized that his presence on earth wasn't needed anymore. And he saw how much we belong together, sweety-Hee-chan!"
Heero kept shaking. What was Relena's problem? But maybe...maybe he could make her feel better. But would this ache in his heart stay so strong?

one month later
"Do you, Relena Peacecraft, take Heero Yuy as your lawfully wedded husband?"
"YES!" Relena grinned, spilling with ego and pride. She'd won!
"Do you, Heero Yuy, take Relena Peacecraft as your lawfully wedded wife?"
"Uhhh..." Heero looked out at the crowd. All of the world nation's highest officers were present, but in the front row sat a worried looking Quatre, Trowa who was watching some birds out the window, and Wufei, who had bubbles of sleep coming from his nose. Quatre caught Heero looking at them, and shook his head. He pointed to the empty seat next to him - of course, where Duo would have sat. Quatre had made sure to save that seat, which wouldn't be filled.
"But..." Heero muttered. Relena sprang into giggles. The preacher went on. "I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride."
"But-HEY! MMpph!" Heero's protest was muffled as Relena whooped with joy and sprang on him, kissing him fiercely.
Quatre sighed sadly, and glared at Trowa, who was smiling at the birds and waving at them.

Heero allowed himself to be dragged along, as Relena ate the various foods laid out on the buffet table. He was relived when Quatre came over and pulled him aside to talk in private.
"Did you really say yes?"
"I dunno."
"You didn't. What are you going to do?"
"Well...i dunno."
"I know you don't love her. And you KNOW i don't think Duo would kill himself."
"I..." Heero shrugged.
Quatre furrowed his brow. "Heero! What about your honeymoon?"
"I dunno."
"Grow up, Heero!" Quatre stomped off, grabbing Trowa by the arm and dragging him out, too. Wufei was still asleep in church. Heero stared at the wall. Honeymoon...? It might be fun to see what sex was like with a girl.
"Duo." Heero said, and Relena turned to him. "WHAT DID YOU SAY?!"
"Nothing." Heero stared at the wall now. It apparently WAS possible for him to become more lifeless and monotone then before.

one year later
"So how's Relena?"
"Eh." Heero twisted the phone cord around his finger. "Fat."
"Heero." Quatre grumbled into the phone. Ever since Relena had gotten pregnant, Heero had been even less responsive. His "I dunno's" had diminished to grunts in a matter of days. "Well, isn't it almost time? The doctors said today!"
"Hn." Heero didn't really care. "'Said it's going to be a boy."
"I know, Heero. i KNOW. Why can't you care a little more? I don't care if you love her or not, but geez..."
"Quatre, she's CRAZY!" Heero muttered, and as he spoke, Relena hopped into the room. "Hee-chan! I'm having a baby today!" And hopped out.
Quatre gulped. "Ok, i heard that...yeh, I agree, but geez..."
Heero shrugged. "I dunno. I'm going to dump her at the hospital then go for a beer, wanna come?"
"Ok. I'm bringing Trowa."
"Fine." Click.
Heero turned from the phone, and shouted. "Relena! Come on, let's go to the hospital!"
Relena hopped in, her overly large stomach making her look more deformed than normal. "Why, Heero?"
"Because i'm the man and i said so." Heero quickly picked her up, and headed for the hospital.

"It HURTS!" Relena squealed. Heero winced. The doctor smiled warmly. "I know it hurts, sweety, now just push."
Relena cried out in pain. She looked at Heero. "Hold my hand?"
"No." Heero stared at the wall as Relena went on wailing and screaming. After nearly half an hour, the doctor said, "Good job! You did it!"
Relena laughed. "Hehe, i'm special!"
"Er, yeh." The doctor held a small bundle in his arms. He smiled, then looked down at the baby. "Hn...wierd..."
"What?" Heero stood, remotely interested. He looked down at his baby, and blinked.
The baby looked incredibly proud of itself if not slightly ticked off. Relena started whimpering and whining. "It's mine, let me see!"
The doctor handed the small baby to Relena, who grinned. "Awwww-! Eeps!!" She cried out, as the baby was glaring at her as if it hated her to hell. She whimpered. "Baby-kins? Don't you love your mommy?" And she hugged it. "Hee-chan, lets name him Percival!"
The baby started struggling and fighting at this, and after realizing he really couldn't, he started to scream at the top of his lungs. Heero snickered. "That's my boy." Relena looked truly scared. The doctor held his hands over his ears.

"So? What do we call it?"
"Him."
Relena and Heero sat in the oversized living room of their oversized house, pondering. Heero got an idea.
"Duo."
"WHAT?!" Relena screeched. The baby just glared at her, then made happy baby sounds in Heero's direction.
"Well, i think we should name him after my old best friend. It was because of him that i married you, Relena." Heero shrugged. Relena shuddered. "I don't want my son named after DUO MAXWELL!"
The baby howled. Heero snarled, and grabbed him from Relena. "I'm the man, i want to name my son Duo after my good friend. SO fuck off. He doesn't even like you!"
Relena's lower lip quivered. "But he's MY baby." She brightened. "MAYBE HE'S HUNGRY!"
Newly named baby Duo screamed and clung to Heero. Heero shrugged. "I want my son to be tough. We should just use bottles from the start."
Duo made happy sounds again, and Relena pouted.

ten months later
"HEEEEERO!"
"What?" Heero looked up as he heard Relena calling him from Duo's room.
"He said something, Heero quick!"
Heero stood, grumbling. He wondered why Relena even bothered. The kid obviously hated her - he only ate what Heero gave him, only wanted Heero to hold him, and screamed if Relena tried to do anything remotely motherly. He also thought it was strange that Duo had purple blue eyes and brown hair - the same color that his old friend Duo Maxwell used to have. He made it upstairs, and looked into Duo's room. Relena was hopping around. "He said a WORD!"
Heero rolled his eyes. "What word?"
"Well, i dunno."
Heero walked over, picking Duo up. Duo grinned insanely. "Kill."
Trying to not grin, Heero frowned. "He said 'kill'."
"AWWWW!" Relena squealed.
"YOU." Duo had turned to look at Relena, and was grinning insanely at her. "Kill YOU."
Heero snickered. Relena squealed. "He wants to play pretend!"
"Er, yah." Heero decided to get away from the terribly hyper Relena, and, taking Duo, he walked downstairs. "Weird first words, son."
"Hehehehehe..." Duo snickered. Heero sat him on the floor. "Uh, you play something quiet." Heero picked up his Guns Unlimited issue and, sitting in an overstuffed armchair, began reading.
Duo stared at his toys. Various stuffed bears, a pink barbie car, and a pink puppy that told him it loved him if he touched it. Duo sniffed. Of course, Relena had the only say with what he was allowed to buy.
That bitch will get hers. Buying me a pink barbie car - how sick.
Duo grabbed the puppy and tried to rip its nose off. The puppy chuckled. "I love you!"
"KILL." Duo succeeded in pulling off its nose, and in succession, its face. He proceeded to chew on the voice box he found inside.
"Thank the lord," Heero muttered, staring at his magazine.
Duo got bored of mutilating his pink toys quickly. He proceeded to arrange the puppy's fuzz into a picture. He arrange the fluff until he liked his picture.
It was a scythe. Duo snickered. Heero looked over, and blinked. "Hey...Duo, when did you learn to do that?"
Duo stared at him. Heero kept talking. "My friend used to have something like that."
Duo stared.
"It was green...and...sparkly."
Duo made gagging noises. Heero shrugged.
"Ok, so it was more of a glow."
Duo nodded in approval, then blinked as, screeching, Relena came down.
"DUO MAXAMILLIAN YUY! LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO THIS POOR PUPPY!" Relena started scooping up the puppy's innards. Duo and Heero sniggered. Relena glared, then picked Duo up. "Come on! Mummy is going to buy you a nice new sweater. Pink. Would you like a Ken doll too, Duo?"
Duo howled in misery, and Heero looked at him sympathetically. Damn, he's weird...why is he so much like the OTHER Duo?
Relena carried the struggling toddler away. Heero was lost in thought.
"Strange...strange." He forgot about it and went back to reading his magazine.

one year later
duo age: almost 2
"Deck the halls with-eep! Duo, stop!"
Duo giggled as he pressed his finger into the light socket, for the pure pleasure of hearing Relena get upset. Heero glared. "Let him have some fun, geez."
"He might DIE! My precious Duo-widdlykins!" Relena cuddled her son, and Duo choked. "STOP. No like!"
"Awww..." Relena set Duo down, and went back to decorating her Christmas tree. Duo stared, then started rooting through various decorations lying around. He finally found what he was looking for.
It was a picture from when Heero and Relena were married. They has been married around Christmas, so the picture was around. Duo stared at the priest in the picture. He held it up to Heero. "Look, dad."
"Hn?" Heero took the picture, and blinked at it. "Yah...what about it, Duo?"
"Priest." Duo rocked back and forth.
Heero raised an eyebrow, then looked at the picture again. Specifically at the priest - and his white and black collar. Like Duo had used to wear. Heero was sure this was what his son was indicating. The strange feeling rising in him again, Heero looked at Duo, who had gone back to pester Relena. His hair was getting long, and he screamed whenever they tried to cut it. He wondered...
"Duo. Come here, i need help with um, this." Heero picked up a candy cane, and grabbed his son's hand, practically dragging the small boy away.
Finally alone, Duo blinked up at Heero, wondering what they were doing. Heero turned Duo around, and started braiding his hair.
Duo blinked again, the grinned. He waited until Heero finished. Finally, he felt himself being spun around, and Heero stared at him. It was uncanny. Duo smirked. Heero sat back.
"Duo...WHY do you look EXACTLY like Duo?"
"'Am Duo." Duo rocked back and forth, grinning.
"I know...I mean, my old friend Duo. Who killed himself."
"Didn't." Duo suddenly frowned. "'Was killed."
Heero blinked slowly. "By who then?"
Duo rocked back and forth more. "Rel-...mommy. Shot 'im. Bang. And he wants 'avenge." Duo snickered a little. Heero didn't understand.
"How would you know this, anyways?" Heero was frightened.
"I just do." Duo got up and walked back downstairs, leaving Heero truly baffled.
Duo grumbled, wondering how Heero could be so stupid. He sneaked past Relena, who was happily hanging various things on the tree, including her Christmas Barbie. He got his coat on, and slipped out the door.
Quatre...Quatre...come on Maxwell, er, Yuy, you know where he lives...
Duo grumbled at himself, and kept walking down the street, searching for the house where he knew Quatre and Trowa lived. An old lady passing the other way stopped and bent down to Duo. "Oh, little boy, do you need help crossing the street, sweety?"
"GO'TA HELL, LADY!" Duo screeched, and the woman rushed off, muttering "Oh dear, oh dear..."
Snickering, Duo kept walking, until he reached the rather large house, ah, mansion, where he knew he'd find Quatre. Looking behind him, he searched the curving colony wall for his own house, wondering how far he'd come. Not seeing it, he shrugged, and walked up to the door. After a few minutes of struggling to reach the doorbell, Duo started banging on the door.
A young women with light blond hair answered the door - probably one of Quatre's sisters. "Oh! You're the Yuy kid. Come in."
Duo stepped into the warm house, and peered around. He knew he'd visited here before, but he didn't really remember too well. Quatre's sister cupped her hands around her mouth. "Quatre! We've got company!"
Duo wasn't surprised when a little animal that looked like a kitten came skidding around the corner and pounced him. Duo squeaked. "HEY! Gettoff! Stop!"
Trowa ran over, and picked up the lion cub. "NO. Bad...bad Sahim. BAD." Trowa wagged his finger at the kitten, who mewled. Duo stood up, growling. "Goddamn cat!"
Trowa blinked in surprise down at Duo. "Uhh...sorry, she's just playful. She didn't mean to hurt you." Trowa raised an eyebrow at the small boy, before turning to Quatre, who had just shown up. He muttered, low enough so Duo couldn't hear. "Damn, Heero's kid is too much like the REAL Duo..."
Quatre nodded, then looked down at Duo. "So, uh, Duo, what did you come over for? Does your mommy want to borrow the pink paint again?"
Duo shook his head. "No. I jis' gotta tell you something." Duo glared at Quatre's sister, who sweatdropped nervously and left. Trowa was still holding the mewling lion kitten. Duo snarled at it. "Trowa, I don't like that thing! G'way, kitty!" Duo swatted at the kitten. Trowa glared. "Ok, I'll put her away, sheesh..." Trowa walked off, mumbling, and Duo grinned. He looked up at Quatre. "C'mon, les go somewhere private where no kitties or girls'll come bother us." Duo crossed his arms, and Quatre shrugged. "Er...ok...I know where we can go, i guess. Come on."
And they walked down the stairs to Quatre's basement.