A/N: Heylo everyone! This is my first FMA fanfic and I haven't seen too many episodes so if I get the facts wrong, GOMEN-NASAI!

Summary: When Alphonse is murdered, Edward loses sight of reality as well as himself. No one can seem to reach him … well, that is except one colonel. Implies yaoi, depression, and self-mutilation.

WARNING: Okay, this story is yaoi, male relationships. Anyone who feels uncomfortable reading this should turn back now. You have been warned.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the FMA characters … just this particular story plot, so please do not sue.

Chapter one / Prologue

'Why Al? Why? Why did you have to leave me like that?'

Edward Elric laid in bed with the covers over his head. It had been three weeks since the incident and yet he still refused to budge. No one knew what to do. Everyone knew how much Alphonse Elric meant to Edward, but he had to get up sooner or later.

Countless people had attempted to reason with him, only to be screamed away. Since he wouldn't allow himself to cry, Ed took his anger out on anyone and everyone who dared to enter his room.

The only time Ed didn't scream at someone, was when food was brought to him and he snuck to go shower.

"Fullmetal, you need to get your ass out of bed. It can't be healthy to stay in bed for almost a month without bathing," Roy Mustang sighed with his eyes closed and he brought in a plate of food. After closing the door however, he opened his eyes to see Edward no longer in the bed … but coming out of the bathroom (A/N: There's a bathroom attached to the bedroom.) with nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist.

Putting the plate down before dropping it, he gaped at the young boy.

"What are you staring at, Colonel?" Ed glared.

Roy couldn't believe it. "You actually got out of bed willingly?"

Putting his pinky finger of his left hand in his ear, the blonde replied, "Yeah? What's it to you? This isn't the first time I've taken a shower this month."

"If you've been out and about then why haven't you been at work?" asked the older man.

Ed shrugged. "I didn't feel like going. Besides, it's not like I would of gotten any work done," he whispered.

"Edward! It's been three weeks since it happened! I know your upset, so are we, but you can't ignore your duties just because--"

"Just because of what! Just because my brother was slaughtered by that bastard! Yeah, I think I do have a reason to ignore my duties," the alchemist shouted as he ran back into the bathroom, slamming the door.

Roy looked as if someone had punched him in the stomach. He knew what he said was out of line. How would he feel if he had a younger brother that had been wrongly taken from him?

After a few minutes, Ed came back out in his usual clothes. Walking over the chair by the desk, he pulled off his red coat and put it on.

This puzzled the black-haired man. It was summer, at least eighty degrees and he puts on a coat? This didn't make any sense.

He snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the door open. "Fullmetal, where are you going?"

"Anywhere but here. But why would you care?" Ed answered followed by a slamming of the door.

A/N: I know this was short, but it was only the prologue. In future chapters, if I get facts wrong, please review and tell me. I adore this series and I don't want to mess it up. Thanks!