A/N: This is my first ever fanfic. I really hope the characters aren't too OOC since that's the main reason I'm apprehensive about writing fanfic in general. Also please excuse any spelling and grammatical mistakes, especially ones to do with tenses, I really have trouble with getting them right.
Warning: Sasuke x Naruto (don't say I didn't warn you)
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, please don't sue me.
Before reading: This story is set in an alternate universe where Konoha is a kingdom ruled by a royal family, the Uchihas, who at first serve as nothing more than mere figureheads while the Hokage was the one to actually run the kingdom, just like with the Queen and Prime Minister of Britain. However this changes when war breaks out between the allied countries, resulting in many civilian casualties and also building a mistrust of ninjas in general. The people decided to reinstate the royal family as rulers, namely Sasuke since he's the only survivor, and pass laws that would reduce ninjas to no more than mere guards, doing nothing but protecting the prince and patrolling the streets. In this world ninjas are like policemen and don't do any missions. All those that oppose these laws however refuse to serve any countries and become missing-nins who still take on missions like they use to in the old days, like Jiraiya and Naruto.
To Win A Prince's Heart
Two hours. It had been two long boring hours since he'd first arrived at his teacher's door and still the old geezer hadn't even made as much as a peep. Bored out of his mind the blond boy fell back against the lobby wall, sliding down to plop himself onto the carpeted floor with an irritated grunt. Placing a hand on over his grumbling stomach Uzumaki Naruto raised his brilliant blue eyes up to the plain white ceiling above. If it wasn't for the fact he had been threatened with no training if he dared disturb the pervert or even think of moving from his spot he would have already long left and made his way straight to the nearest ramen shop. He stared blankly down at the empty corridors, thinking of the day ahead. At just the thought he let out an almost weary sigh. After nearly four years with the old perverted hermit Naruto was finally returning, back to Konoha, the place where his dreams had both began and ended.
After the massacre of the royal family and the war that nearly destroyed them all, the major powers were reduced to what they are now. No more than mere remnants of the mighty nations they had all once been. Everything changed. People feared what they didn't understand and not long after the rubble had settled fingers immediately began to point. All the ninjas that had once been so revered were now considered too dangerous, their numbers too great and powers too destructive. After a decision was made regarding the future of the kingdoms the Kages were no more, academies were abolished, the ninja arts locked away and from then on no country was to have more than a hundred shinobis in service at any one time, a significant drop from the hundreds that had once made up more than half of the population. Now those lucky enough to get the title were only allowed to train in taijutsu with the exception of the lucky few with an advanced bloodline who were the only ones allowed to freely develop their skills and techniques. For everybody else becoming a ninja was to be no more than a dream.
As a child all he ever wanted was to be acknowledged and the only way he knew how was to become a great ninja. Yet, like everything else he ever had that was also taken away from him. Since each kingdom was only allowed a very few it was integral only the ones with the most potential were trained into shinobis. Three times he took the exam and three times he'd fail. However unlike the others who were allowed to retake it as many times as they wish after his third try he was refused another chance. To say the least, he was absolutely devastated, and to add salt to the wounds it was also on that very same day he finally learned the truth, the reason why everybody ignored and hated him. He once thought that knowing would somehow help him. That it would allow him to fix whatever it was that was wrong with him but if anything it only made everything worst. For Naruto learned once and for all it was never really him they hated but what was sealed inside him. The nine tails, the demon that had nearly destroyed Konoha long before the war even began, before he was born. Though he was only the vessel, in the eyes of the kingdom he was the monster itself, the murderer of their families and comrades. And no matter how hard he tried, no matter how hard he pushed himself, no one would ever see him as anything more that. But life always had a way of surprising people when they least expected it and that's exactly what it did when Jiraiya was sent his way. Unlike everybody else the old geezer didn't see the nine tails when he looked at him. Sure the perverted hermit hadn't been too fond of him at first, especially since he interrupted his precious research and then refused to leave him alone until he promised to train him. In the end however Jiraiya finally caved and when he decided to leave Konoha it was with a smiling blond boy in toe, a boy that was to be his new apprentice.
Although Naruto still thought of home from time to time he never once regretted leaving. He had someone who acknowledged him now and though at times it didn't seem like it, cared about him in his own weird little way, his teacher, the one who had taught him all these years in the ways of the old world. Where being a ninja was so much more than a job. It was a way of life.
The sound of a creaking door immediately brought him out of his musings. He bolted to his feet and lifted a hand to point an accusing finger at the white-haired man he expected to see. Only to be met with a pair of yellow snake-like eyes set in an extremely pasty face that had a somewhat sickly gray tinge to it. He lowered his arm as the words died on his lips, keeping absolutely still while the eyes remained stared fixedly on him. There was something unholy about that gaze.
Thin lips twisted into an ugly smirk. The blond involuntarily shuddered at the sight of the man's long tongue, wide eyes immediately diverting from the disturbing scene as the zombie like figure made a show of licking thin pale lips. Just looking made his skin crawl. But to turn away was to show weakness and no matter how the stranger made him feel he was always a ninja first and a fourteen year old boy second. He straightened but instead of looking back at the man settled on glaring at his subordinate, a tall lithe youth with pale gray hair and dark eyes hidden beneath the sheen of large round glasses.
"We must take our leave now," the older boy said with a polite nod. "We'll be expecting to see one of your people in the main draw."
Silently he watched the pair make their leave, not giving himself the luxury of relaxing until they were completely out of sight. It was only then did he turn to the geezer that stood beside him, a dark frown marring his usually relaxed features.
"What the hell are you doing taking a job from that snake freak Ero-sennin?" he all but growled. "And why did you tell me to come and wait for you when you knew you were going to be in a meeting?"
"That snake freak is Orochimaru, the current advisor to the only heir of the throne and not one you can easily say no to," the man replied, purposely choosing to ignore his second question.
"What?" Naruto instantly yelled. "What the hell? How the hell did that thing become the royal advisor?"
"He was one of the ones that defected after the war and claimed to have been under the influence of a powerful mind control," Jiraiya replied in an unusually tight voice. "He was too important to lose so after a probationary period the council reinstated him to his original position."
Naruto frowned at the seriousness in his teacher's voice. "You don't believe him, do you?"
"I wouldn't be surprised if he orchestrated the whole thing."
"Then why-"
"Haven't you ever heard the saying brat? Keep your friends close and your enemies even closer," was the only response he got.
Naruto opened his mouth, only to close it again with a frown. He didn't know what was going on but he knew one thing for sure, whatever it was it going to be big, especially if it got the old man all serious like this. He glanced up but instead of the expected somberness he saw something else, something ten times scarier than a hundred of that freaky snake guy put together. Gulping audibly at the sight of the ever-familiar expression adorning his teacher's face he took a small step back. It was the same one he always got whenever he thought of doing research, only this time it was directly focused on him instead of a random female.
Rubbing his hands together the man evilly cackled, "Beside this was one offer too good to pass up on."
With a nervous laugh Naruto slowly took another step back, ready to bolt at a second's notice. The last time that look was directed at him he found himself beaten to a bloody pulp by a group of very angry women. Just before he was about to make his getaway he felt a firm hand grip the back of his jacket, hoisting his smaller body into the air and face to face with the now leering white-haired pervert.
"I have an A-level mission for you."
He froze at the words, eyes widening as every last thought of escaping fled from his mind. This was it. Ever since he came under the guidance of the legendary sannin (a term he used very loosely) this was what he had been waiting for. It meant he was nearing the level of jounin in his teacher's eyes. Like an over-excited kid he burst out excitedly, "What? What am I going to do? Espionage? Recovery? Protection? What? What? Tell me! Tell me now!"
His instructor gave a toothy grin, a glint in his eyes as he leaned down to reply, "I guess you could call it espionage. It does require going undercover."
At that he released the young boy who immediately jumped back up to pump a fist in the air. On the verge of what looked like happy tears the blond ninja yelled, "Yosh! I'm going to become the best ninja in the world and then everybody's finally going to recognize me."
"Oh, they're going to recognize you all right," came a gleeful chuckle that was quickly followed by a rustle of what sounded like paper.
Naruto froze and narrowed his eyes, not liking the amusement he heard one bit but before he could even utter a word something was shoved right in his face. He frowned, scratching his head in confusion as he squinted at the words printed neatly in extravagant script over the expensive looking paper.
Still chuckling the man added, "Because you're going to take part in the biggest tournament to ever take place in the kingdom of Konoha."
His mouth fell open upon taking a closer look.
"Too bad you can't use your sexy no jutsu for this, you'll be a shoe in for sure," mused a thoughtful voice. "But with the Sharingan and Byakugan there's no doubt you'll be found out in a second."
Naruto clenched his fists.
"Hm... I guess we could put a wig and a dress on you, but what about breasts?"
His teeth grounded.
"Do you still have those water balloons we used for training?"
A sudden tick appeared on his forehead as he watched the old geezer search through his backpack. With a smile the man pulled out two already filled balloons and held it to the fuming blonde's chest, causing the tick to quickly turn to a twitch.
"Ah, perfect."
"Sexy no jutsu," was the replying yell, causing the older male to practically slobber as the boy quickly transformed into a buxom blonde beauty right before his eyes.
Jiraiya leaned forward slightly at the sound of soft girly giggles, too lost in the arousing image to notice the murderous glare in the blue eyes or the rising foot aimed dangerously at his crotch.
"Take that you pervert!"
From quite a distance away a loud pain-filled cry could be heard. A sound that was quickly followed by a childish laugh and not long after with the sight of a grinning boy fleeing from a red-faced man burning with murderous intent and screaming, "You'll pay for that you little bastard!"
"Damn," Naruto swore under his breath, crossing his arms angrily over the padded bra strapped to his chest as he mulled over his current predicament. He grudgingly trudged forward as the line of chattering girls began to slowly move. In any other circumstance he would have been able to fully appreciate the sight around him. For despite all his moping he wasn't so blind as to not notice the beautiful hordes of girls currently awaiting the exact same fate he was. Nor was he completely oblivious to the conversations around him. All of which were currently centered on the sole reason for the crowd and more importantly the target of this pathetic excuse of a mission. Apart from the speck he had glimpsed during the royal address he was still completely in the dark about what this so-called 'hunk of a prince' looked like. It wasn't as if he cared but from what he heard the boy was supposed to be god's gift to women. He let out a rather unlady-like snort at that. His short spiky hair may have been covered by a long blonde wig and in place of his favorite orange jumpsuit may be a short summer dress, but he'll be damned before he'll start gushing about how cute the Uchiha punk was. He bared his teeth in a growl. 'Damn that perverted hermit! Why couldn't he find a bloody girl to carry out this mission? Why the hell did it have to be me?'
"Next."
Naruto snapped his head up just in time to see what must've been the thousandth girl be turned away, sobbing hysterically. He felt his spirits lift. The girl was absolutely breathtaking. If she wasn't allowed through then what hope did he have. He grinned. It wouldn't be his fault if he was to be refused entrance. No one could say he didn't try and most of all that bloody hermit couldn't blame this failure on him. At the beckoning wave of the old hag by the open flap of the tent he confidently approached the four men he found within, each of whom were identically masked with a clipboard in hand. Reaching into the pocket of his dress Naruto handed over the form he'd filled out before stepping back to rest on the heels of his shoes, peering closely at the group through squinted eyes as the old woman closed the door behind him. Lazily she slipped out a little orange book and began to read.
"Name?" one of the men immediately asked.
'Why the hell did they get us to fill those bloody things if they were going to ask the same questions on it anyway?' he thought irritably, remembering the trouble he had trying to get one of the girls to lend him their back so he could fill his in.
"Name?" repeated a rather impatient voice.
"Um... Naruto Uzumaki," he responding without thinking. Not once noticing the woman in the background, who immediately snapped her head up as one eye turned a blood red and narrowed on him.
"It says here you're Akitsu Tanemura."
"Oh, hehe... Akitsu is my middle name and eh, Tanemura is my mother's maiden name. I, eh, guess I just forgot to put my first name before the second and my last name after hers," he nervously explained before bursting out into a bout of girly giggles and scratching the back of his head for good measure, trying for the ditzy blond act he'd often seen many of the hermit's 'lady friends' put up. All the while assuring himself no one would recognize his name, especially since while in Konoha all people ever did was try to forget he even existed. "Silly me. I can be so forgetful sometimes."
"Hm..." was all the man said. Shrugging it aside he wrote something down and then went on to ask, "Age?"
He let out a relieved sigh and with a wide smile chirpily replied, "Fourteen."
At that all four nodded approvingly. He watched as they exchanged glances, silently nodding to one another as each leapt into action. Before he knew it the figures suddenly turned into indistinguishable blurs. 'They're fast,' he thought with a frown. He quickly glanced around. Eyes steady as he awaited some kind of assault. Both hands unconsciously reaching for the kunai carefully hidden in the bandages taped to his thighs. Flashes of movement caught his attention and though he was unable to pinpoint their whereabouts he knew one thing was for sure, all four were closing in on him. Grounding his teeth he was just about to pull his weapons out when instead of a hit he felt a set of hands cupping his water balloon breast while another went around his hips and thighs.
"Not too small, not too big, perfect fit for the hand. The prince would like that."
"Good hips too, great for childbearing. I'm sure she'll be able to squeeze out three or four easily."
"Nice strong thighs too. The prince will definitely have fun in the sack with this one."
Naruto blinked and blinked again. His mouth fell open as blue eyes went as wide as saucers. He didn't think it possible but there were actually people out there worst than that damned perverted hermit. His left eye began to twitch, hands clenching in absolute rage as the men continued their inspection. It was only when he felt something moving up his thigh that he totally lost it.
"DIE!"
For a while all that could be heard were thumps and yells as a large dust cloud enveloped the five. When it finally dissipated it was to reveal three of the four completely knocked out and piled on top of each other while the last one swung an arm back for a punch aimed directly at the seething boy before him. It never had the chance to land because at that exact same moment, from what seemed like absolutely no where Naruto appeared right behind him to land a drop kick across the man's head. The sudden impact sent him flying onto his already unconscious comrades in a dead faint. Smirking in satisfaction the still standing boy brushed his hands together and smiled smugly down at the fallen group. He was just about to give the lot another swift kick for good measure when with a puff of smoke they all completely disappeared from sight. He frowned upon realizing what had happened. They were replicas.
"You know most little girls would usually freak out when they see any ninja technique being used," came a deep voice that couldn't have possibly belonged to the little old woman that had greeted him at the door. He slowly turned around. Instead of the wrinkled crone a tall silver-haired man stood in her place, his black forehead protector tilted slightly to cover one eye while a black mask did the job of hiding more than half his face. The only indication that the little old woman and the man that now stood there were one in the same was the little orange book the tall giant held.
Naruto frowned, suddenly noticing what the man held for the first time. Unable to help but feel a sense of familiarity at the sight of the book he squinted at the cover and instantly felt his mouth drop. That thing was the reason for nearly all his troubles, the reason for all the longs delays in between training. Because that thing was what his teacher was always constantly gathering information for, Come Come Paradise. He shuddered. He couldn't believe someone actually read that crap. He lifted twitching hands to his head, tugging at the long locks slightly as he barely refrained from literally pulling out his hair. A single thought ran through his mind, 'Why the hell do the perverts always flock to me?'
"But I can see you're obviously not like most little girls," the stranger said, making him jump somewhat when he suddenly appeared right before him, so close their nose almost touched. However unlike the replications he was shocked to find he was unable to sense the movement at all. He glared at the eye carefully scrutinizing him from head to toe and watched warily as the man fell back a bit. The slight curving of his only visible eye indicating what seemed to be a smile.
From nowhere the masked pervert pulled out a tag and placed the number 69 on the cross dressing boy's slightly misshapen chest as he happily announced, "Congratulations, you just qualified to participate in the tournament for Prince Sasuke's hand."
Taken aback by the turn of events Naruto immediately froze. He dropped his hand and for the second time that evening found himself completely dumbfounded.
"WHAT!"
From the height of the palace tower two lone figures silently observed the women gathered in the courtyard below. One masked by a look of utter boredom as the other let out an almost wolfish growl. Despite their differences in demeanor both shared a common thread. Around the forehead of one and the arm of the other rested the now rare Konoha head protector, marking them both as ninjas of the leaf.
"You'd think it'll be a natural reaction for a girl to bash a guy's head in for feeling her up," the shaggy haired Kiba muttered while the other did no more than let out a tired yawn. "Sixty nine, sixty-nine girls out of over a thousand. Do you believe it? I mean all they had to do was push the guys away, hit them or show indignation of some sort. Not run away or worst yet let the bloody clones feel them up. Dammit it's only the first test and already they're dropping like flies. What the hell is going to happen when we get to the hard stuff? At this rate we'll never get that moody bastard hitched." With a frustrated sigh he paused to run calloused fingers through the soft fur of his ever faithful companion, a small puppy that yelped in return, sounding as if it was trying to assuage the boy's worry. "I don't even want to think of what will happen if his royal-pain-in-the-ass doesn't marry before he turns sixteen."
"I knew I should've gone with Shino," came the lazy murmur. "He's a loss less troublesome."
Kiba growled and turning his frustrations on the other boy yelled, "Is there anything or anyone that's not troublesome to you?"
"Yes," Shikamaru forced himself to reply, causing the other ninja to lean forward slightly in silent anticipation. "Sleeping."
At that the youth fell back with a sweat drop. Quickly regaining his composure he got back to his feet and bared his canines. Clearly irritated by the reply he grabbed the boy by the shirt and shook him hard. "If Sasuke doesn't end up marrying one of these girls that damned bastard Orochimaru is going to be our new king." He took in a deep breath and louder than before again shouted, "King, do you hear me?"
Annoyed at being bothered Shikamaru shoved the hands away and crossing his arms turned his head aside to mutter under his breath, "What a troublesome guy."
"Arrr... take this seriously you lazy ass. The future of Konoha is at stake."
Without a word Shikamaru moved away from the balcony and placed himself down on a nearby chair, hands coming together to form what looked liked an upside down spade with his thumbs and fingers.
After taking a moment to collect himself Kiba followed him in and was about ready to stick it to other ninja again when he noticed the familiar pose. He fought the urge to smirk as he thought, 'So he isn't as unaffected as he seems.'
For what seemed like forever they remained in perfect silence.
It was only when the hands fell and the boy stood that Kiba finally dared to ask, "Well?"
His expression never changing the youth turned on his heels and as he began walking away murmured, "I'm going home."
"Why you-" came the responding growl. With his patience tested beyond its limits Kiba was just about to rush over and pound the so-called genius's skull in when the youth tilted his head back and with a small smile sent a kunai straight at him. He easily dodged and was just about to gloat over the missed shot when a familiar yelp alerted him to the fact Akamaru was right behind him. He spun around just in time to see the blade land mere inches from the pooch. Although aimed to miss it clearly did its intended job. Startled by the attack from a trusted friend the dog jumped up in fright and was just about to go over the ledge when the panicked boy quickly sped over to promptly catch the small body and hug it tightly to his. By the time Kiba turned back Shikamaru was already gone, leaving him alone to seethe in his rage.
Even though he knew the other boy probably analyzed the actual chances he wouldn't get there in time and found them in his favor he was still way beyond pissed. Furious by the dirty trick he yelled down the empty corridor, "You better run because when I catch you I'm going to kill you, you shithead!"
Quite a distance away Shikamaru shoved his hands deep into the pocket of his black trousers and with a sigh muttered silently to himself, "How troublesome."