The Closet Speaks
Chapter 6: Bohemia
Disclaimer: Don't own the song, don't own the characters, but HELL YEAH I OWN THE RANDOMNESS!
(A/N: Sorry I didn't update for so long… I had to deal with homework and a large brick blocking by writer-ness-ness-ness… Thank you Smenzer, snowmouse, tortugan.sparrow, hermionerocks2008, Kiwi-San, Sugar Quill High, Crying Pixie, Gone-Goonie, AmericanIdiot252 for the reviews… To make things easier, I'll type whatever Draco's saying in bold and Hermione's in normal.)
WARNING: VERY RANDOM. IF YOU ARE A SERIOUS PERSON, PLEASE READ SOMETHING SERIOUS SUCH AS PRIDE AND PREJUDICE BY JANE AUSTEN (which, by the way, is really romantic… Pride and Prejudice, I mean.)
Updated on 5 December to make it look neater.
...bohemia…
"…"
"…"
"…"
"Is this the real life…"
"Yeah it is…"
"Is this just fantasy…"
"What the…"
"Caught in a landslide…"
"In all of Hogwarts history, there were no reports of landslides. You should know since you read Hogwarts A History a thousand times."
"No escape from reality…"
"…"
"Open your eyes…"
"They, unfortunately, are open, mybeauty challenged friend…"
"Look up to the skies and see…"
"There are no windows here, idiot."
"I'm just a poor boy…"
"What? You're a transvestite?"
"I need no sympathy…"
Sigh.
"You're in denial my half-witted and half-brother…"
"Because I'm easy come, easy go…"
"Then how come you never leave?"
"Little high, little low…"
"That's true…"
"Anyway the wind blows, doesn't really matter to me…"
"Actually it does, there was this one time the wind blew and your skirt was… Never mind."
"To me…"
"…"
"Mama, just killed a man…"
"Hey, I'm not your mother… Hold on, you WHAT?"
"Put a gun against his head…"
"What's a gun?"
"Pulled my trigger now he's dead…"
"What in the name of Merlin is a bloody trigger?"
"Mama, life had just begun…"
"I told you already, I'm not your mother!"
"But now I've gone and thrown it all away…"
"…"
"Mama…. Oooh…"
"Are you deaf, woman?"
"Didn't mean to make you cry…"
"I know, Mud Pie,it was in your genes you look like that…"
"If I'm not back again this time tomorrow…"
"There won't be a tomorrow if you don't shut up…"
"Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really mattered…"
"But I do matter!"
"Too late, my time has come…"
"What? Don't die! I need a reputation to keep! I don't want to look like a murderer!"
"Send shivers down my spine, body's aching all the time…"
"Huh? Oh… EW."
"Good bye, everybody, I've got to go…"
"At this rate, we're not going anywhere."
"Gotta leave you all behind and face the truth."
"What? You're going to look in a mirror?"
"Mama…. Oooh…. Anyway the wind blows…"
"Huh?"
"I don't want to die…"
"Awh! That just made me sad…"
"Sometimes I wish I've never been born at all…"
"Too bad that you happened…"
"I see a little silhouette of a man…"
"OY. I'm not LITTLE."
"Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the fandango…"
"Number one, I'm Draco Malfoy and what the hell is the fandango?"
"Thunder bolts and lightning, very very frightening me…"
"Scaredy cat…"
"Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Galileo, Magnifico…"
"Me no speaka Inglis…"
"I'm just a poor boy, nobody loves me…"
"Transvestite AND unloved… Tsk, tsk."
"He's just a poor boy from a poor family…"
"Transvestite AND poor… Tsk, tsk…"
"Spare him his life from this monstrosity…"
"I won't. Ha!"
"Easy come easy go, will you let me go?"
"I wish!"
"Bismillah! No! We will not let you go. Let him go!"
"Why are you talking to yourself in that funny voice?"
"Bismillah! We will not let you go. Let him go!"
"…"
"Bismillah! We will not let you go. Let me go!"
"…"
"Will not let you go! Let me go!"
"…"
"Will not let you go! Let me go!"
"…"
"No, no, no, no, no, no, no!"
"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!"
"Mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go…"
"…"
"Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me, for me…"
"Hello, San Fran-psycho…"
"So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye…"
"Never thought of that…"
"So you think you can love me and leave me to die…"
"Why would I love YOU?" (A/N: D/Hr fan girls, please don't kill me…)
"Oh baby… Can't do this to me baby…"
"I repeat, huh?"
"Just gotta get out… Just gotta get right outta here…"
"Well we CAN'T."
"Nothing really matters…"
"I do!"
"Anyone can see…"
"Anyone who said that was blind…"
"Nothing really matters, nothing really matters to me…"
"Oh, now I get it… Your singing! When I tell you to do something, you always to do it later… And I thought you were a responsible Head Girl! Tsk, tsk. I'm telling!"
"To who? Your pink loving friend?"
...bohemia…
(A/N: I told you it was random! If you know the song that Hermione was singing, I'll give you a picture of teh hawt Robert Pattinson! Sorry, crazy here. Review, please?)