Why Shinra wears a full body suit and more...
Disclaimer: I do not own FFX – 2 or anything connected to it… I have a copy of the game though. O.o
Author's note: I must be one of the worst authors in here, seeing as I hardly update much. I apologize for I hardly have the time or the ideas. If I did, I would post them, wouldn't I?
By the way, I still hate Hypellos for some reason.
- Riku Lee
"Greetings! I am Shinra. I'm the Al Bhed wunderkid. In other words, I'm the smartest guy who has ever stepped foot on the Celsius. Which isn't really saying much if you know the people on this ship... Like Brother, Barkeep, Rikku --"
"What cha doin', Shinra?"
"Uh oh... Damn!"
"Did you break your new invention?"
Shinra shut the sphere and turned around.
"Oh yeah... something like that, Rikku." he shrugged.
"Hey! I heard someone swear!" yelled Yuna as a thud proclaimed her presence.
"Can't she just walk down the stairs like normal people? There isn't much to show off when you just skip three stairs by jumping over them... In case she hasn't noticed, a dent is forming on the spot she keeps landing on." thought Shinra.
"It must have been a figment of your imagination, Yuna." Shinra said as he stood up on his chair and turned around to face them.
"What's a figment?" asked Yuna, tilting her head a bit.
"Uh..." stammered Shinra. Sometimes their stupidity can leave him speechless.
"Oh! Oh! I know what imagination is! It's when you think really hard and you see rainbows or random pink fluffy things appear everywhere!" squeals Rikku.
"Really?! Awesome!" squealed Yuna as well.
She clapped her hands twice and thrust her hands forward, holding invisible guns. Rikku cart wheeled behind her, and posed as well. Her hands looked like they were holding daggers. Then they both grinned. Shinra supposed this was a new random pose that they made every 30 minutes…
"Ta da!" Yuna chirped as she crossed her arms, her invisible guns still aimed in front of her.
"Did ya see it, Shinra?" asked Rikku, still holding her pose.
"The pose? Why of course I did, Rikku. It's quite hard not to, with you guys being in front of me and all…" he replied, some of the white mist coming out of his mouthpiece.
"No, silly! Didn't you see the fireworks that went off after we posed?" Rikku giggled. She was laughing so hard that she couldn't hold her pose anymore. She rested one hand on her knees for support and used her other hand to point at Shinra, still laughing heartily.
Shinra blinked. Not like anyone could actually see him do so because of his mask, but I thought I'd just mention it.
Yuna dropped her pose as well and tilted her head to the side, raising an eyebrow. She smiled a bit as if she was trying to understand why Shinra was clueless.
"Didn't you notice that I was wielding two pink fluffy teddy bears and that Rikku was holding two big rainbow coloured candy canes? We weren't really holding our regular weapons…" she asked, placing a hand on her hip.
"Well uh…" stammered Shinra.
"Hmm?" asked Rikku as she got up, wiping a tear from her eye.
"Check it out! We're your neighbourhood-friendly Imagineers!" Yuna yelled, posing once more.
"I'll beat up bad guys with my colourful candy canes of doom!" chirped Rikku, posing as well.
"They've got a lot of imagination… Aha! That's it!" thought Shinra.
"Yuna! Rikku! Guess who else doesn't have imagination?" asked Shinra as he danced/squirmed awkwardly in his seat. Some geniuses have their faults… Shinra's happened to be dancing or squirming (I can't really tell.) while he talks and being short. With him being a genius and all, you'd think he'd make a growth tonic or something…
"Huh? Who?" they asked, simultaneously.
"Barkeep. He really needs your help. You can tell if you've helped him with his imagination enough if he doesn't move slowly and can talk properly!" Shinra yelled, raising his arms up high to emphasize how important it is for them to help Barkeep. If you do not understand the connection of Shinra's speech and his hand gestures, that's all right. If you talk to people like Yuna and Rikku and use exaggerated movements, you'll make a big impact on them.
"Oh no! We've got to help him quick!" Rikku said, making her odd dog-paddling movements.
"That's right! Everyone on the Celsius should be full-fledged Imagineers!" responded her cousin, as she led the way running to the bar.
Shinra waited until the door shut completely and turned back to the sphere. He turned it on and sighed.
"Sorry. Before I was interrupted unnecessarily, I was going to explain why I am such a genius. First off, observe my suit! It's a Fully Automatic Tot Suit or the FATS. Basically, Al Bheds give these suits, or FATS, to toddlers. As the Al Bhed matures, he tries to take on the harsh environment on his own, somewhat proving to others that he or she is indeed older, seeing as they have discarded some clothing and leaving some parts bare to danger. It's something in our culture. It's like they're proving that since they're older, they can protect themselves without the use of FATS. So they just reduce the FATS they have on."
"SHEENRA! WHAT ARE YOU DOING THERE?!" cried someone with a thick Al Bhed accent.
Shinra sighed and turned the sphere off and turned around to face Brother.
"Nothing that your inadequate mind could comprehend." Shinra replied curtly.
"Huh? Oui ghuf vimmo famm dryd E lyh'd ihtancdyht dryd vyhlo-byhdco English myhkiyka!" he whined, complete with his awkward arm gestures.
(Huh? You know fully well that I can't understand that fancy-pantsy English language!)
"Drah fro tet oui pudran dnoehk du maynh ed ev oui'na zicd kuehk du aht ib frehehk?"
(Then why did you bother trying to learn it if you're just going to end up whining?)
"…Cuz I thought that Yuna'd be impressed!"
"I think Yuna'd be more impressed with Barkeep's English… Where ever did you learn English?"
"From… Barkeep."
"Cdibet…"
(Stupid…)
"Crid ib!"
(Shut up!)
"This is why your English is incredibly bad."
"But he was cheap!"
"Didn't you think that was reason enough to wonder why the price was cheap? Note that he doesn't even have the proper pronunciations."
"Gah… Oui'na kejehk sa y raytylra! E's kuehk du pat!"
(Gah… You're giving me a headache! I'm going to bed!)
Brother stuck out his lower lip in an attempt to pout and stomped off to his bedroom. Shinra waited ever so patiently for Brother to go out. When the door closed, Shinra sat down in his chair again, and turned on the sphere again.
"Okay… Where was I? Ah yes… FATS. I've got a lot of FATS but this is the best I've got so far. When I'm out in the desert, I don't faint like Yuna does. My FATS actually has a cooling system inside, so I can stand the most scorching desert. You can tell by my breath. Sometimes my FATS is too cold, you can see my breath come out as mist when I talk. I can't help it. Sometimes the air-conditioning in the bridge dies and it would get hot in here. Brother doesn't really care since all he has on are jumpers. He's so proud that he's old enough to survive without FATS. Rikku too. She's practically running around in a bikini top and mini-skirt with some lame arm warmers and a scarf. It's as if she thinks those could give her the same protection as her old FATS. Well, unknown to many non-Al Bheds, FATS also help with intellect. Note the fact that Brother and Rikku are no match for my intellect, even if the two were to combine. My FATS is so superior, it's got a learning computer built in it. So it can read people's body languages so I can tell what they're thinking of. It's very useful for me in Blitzball when I want to know if someone is going to shoot to my right, left, etc. Also – "
"Hey, Shinra… Have you seen Brother?" asked Buddy.
Shinra sighed and shut the sphere once more. Is today "Bother Shinra While He Works" Day? It sure felt like it.
Shinra stood up on his seat and turned around to face Buddy.
"Oh, I don't know…"
Buddy looked at Shinra for a while and leaned in closer.
"Look, man. I know you're lying to me. I got my FATS on right now." Buddy said, tapping his goggles.
Shinra blinked. "What? But that's so… small."
"Well, I'm old and fit enough to fend for myself without complete FATS. I kept the goggles since it is helpful, like now. I don't know why Rikku and Brother ditched theirs. They thought they'd look cool without them. Maybe they got confused with the FATS and the actual fat…"
"…That's reasonable. Brother's in his room. He's probably crying right now or something."
"Thanks, Shinra. Good luck with your sphere report thing." Buddy called out as he waved and left the bridge.
So Shinra waited, again. The door closed, again. And Shinra sat down and turned on the sphere, again.
"….Also I have failed to mention that there are other versions of FATS but I suppose that mine is far more superior to any other version. It is just a prototype, but I will strive to improve it. Who knows? Maybe it'll unravel the mystery of Hypellos and their missing link between Smurfs and giant frogs or it'll explain why Yuna enjoys helping people she doesn't know… Heck, it might translate Rikku's and Brother's phrases into sensible ones that I will understand. Until next time, this has been 'Learning The Why's Of How Certain Characters Dress Up' This is Shinra, Al Bhed wunderkid, who has taken his free time off to explain these odd things to you. Good bye!"
Yay! I'm done! Now I can write about the others!
Who wants FATS now?!
xD