Pre-notes: In prior stories of mine I chose to have uber loads of fun playing with character accents. However in this story, especially in the case of Numbuh Four, who, as we all know, has a very thick Australian accent, I've declined to do so. The reason for this is that Australian is too similar to American English. Also in my previous stories, the characters with accents were Ocs. If you're reading this story, I'm going to assume that you know who the characters are and what they sound like, so I'm sure you can imagine what they sound like.
Disclaimer: I do not own Codename: Kids Next Door or it's wonderful characters. They are the property of Mr. Warburton and Curious Pictures.
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Operation: D.R.A.M.A.Dopey
Romeo
Admits
More
Affection
Prologue
"Kids Next Door… Battle stations!"
"Numbuh Five! Ready!" answered a cool black girl.
Kids Next Door Operative Numbuh Five sat behind the launch panel of a F.L.I.B.I.K.E. (Funky Launcher Is Best In Katching Enemies). Her real name was Abigail Lincoln, though she preferred Numbuh Five or, if absolutely necessary, Abby. She was also known as "The Quiet One" for her stealth abilities and expertise in espionage. With long black hair in a single braid hidden under a red cap, she wore a dark blue t-shirt, oversized so that her shorts were hidden.
"Numbuh Four! Ready!" called a tough Australian boy.
Kids Next Door Operative Numbuh Four operated the controls for a M.O.P.E.D. (Motor-vehicle Outruns Pansy Enemy Doofuses). Wallabee Beetles, or Wally, or, if a person didn't want to get the daylights knocked out of them, Numbuh Four. This knack for hand-to-hand combat earned him the title of "The Tough Kid" …despite his diminutive stature. Blue jeans, topped by an orange hoodie protected his body while his blonde hair protected, or possibly impeded, his eyes.
"Numbuh Three! Ready!" added a charming Japanese girl.
Kids Next Door Operative Numbuh Three rode up in the passenger seat of the M.O.P.E.D. Kuki Sanban, Numbuh Three to her teammates, specialized in diversionary tactics; specialized as in she could do so without trying or even realizing it. The title "The Flirt" probably came from her preferred method: dancing frivolously with her long shiny black hair waving freely behind her. Her green sweatshirt over her black pants was huge, its sleeves of which were so long that one rarely saw her hands.
"Numbuh Two! Ready!" replied a stout geeky boy.
Kids Next Door Operative Numbuh Two busied himself piloting the F.L.I.B.I.K.E. Hoagie P. Gilligan Jr., better known as Numbuh Two, was a genius of the Kids Next Door's infamous two by four technology. Each of the mechanical wonders that the team of Sector V used was of his invention. However, his outstanding ability also labeled him a geek, "The Doofus." He wore brown pants and a light blue short-sleeved shirt and, to accent his love of aeronautics, he was never seen without his pilot's cap or yellow goggles.
"Numbuh One! Ready!" shouted a capable British boy.
Kids Next Door Operative Numbuh One slapped a few tools to his belt. Nigel Uno, a.k.a. Numbuh One, devised the strategy for each mission. Officially "The Leader," his over the top plans often failed to meet their original objectives, but, overall, mostly succeeded in the long run. Wearing a red sweater and khaki shorts, Numbuh One employed shiny black sunglasses, possibly to compensate for the lack of hair on the rest of his head.
"Operatives, go!" Numbuh One shouted, hopping into a small compartment at the bottom of the craft.
"Roger, Numbuh One," Numbuh Two replied. He pressed a few buttons and turned a few knobs, expertly guiding the vehicle out of the suburbs into town, finding the main thoroughfare.
Below them, Numbuhs Three and Four tore down the street in the direction of Main Street. "Numbuh Four ta Numbuh Two," Numbuh Four spoke into the radio with his distinct Australian accent. "Can you see the target?"
"I've got it on radar, Numbuh Four. Hold on a sec'," Numbuh Two answered. He punched a few buttons and the picture appeared on the screen in front of Numbuh Three.
"Are we gettin' close, Numbuh Three?" Numbuh Four asked.
"Hmm… now that's strange," Numbuh Three said, poking her finger at the screen in front of her.
"What's strange?" Numbuh Four asked.
"I thought we were supposed to follow the delivery truck," Numbuh Three replied, looking at him confusedly.
"What?" Numbuh Four repeated, leaning over and looking at the screen. Behind their dot was another larger dot that was their target. The two glanced at each other before turning their heads and looking behind them. A large CPS truck was coming up on their rear, honking its loud horn. Each screamed as Numbuh Four made a hard right into the sidewalk to avoid collision as the truck zoomed past. The M.O.P.E.D. hit a streetlamp and split in two.
"Numbuh Three! Numbuh Four!" Numbuh Two shouted when he saw their crash.
"Hold steady, Numbuh Two! We have to complete the mission!" Numbuh One ordered.
"Numbuh One, the truck's drivin' at a high speed. We needed Numbuh Three and Numbuh Four to create a distraction," Numbuh Five reported.
"Then we'll just have to kick it into high gear," Numbuh One said. "Numbuh Two! Engage hyperactive hyper drive!
"You got it, Numbuh One!" Numbuh Two answered. He clenched his fist around a red lever and thrust it forward. Immediately the F.L.I.B.I.K.E. boosted into high speed and flew through the air. "Wahoo!" Numbuh Two yelled as they whizzed through the air over the town. In no time the target came into their sights.
"All right. Numbuh Five, prepare for launch," Numbuh One instructed.
"You got it, chief," Numbuh Five replied, pressing a few buttons before leaping out of her seat and dropping into a compartment next to Numbuh One's. A few seconds later, the two operatives were fired from two cannons on the F.L.I.B.I.K.E.'s underside and flew toward the truck. Two thuds were heard when they made contact with the truck, grabbing on with a suction cup on each hand.
"What the…?" the driver wondered aloud at the sound, turning to look out his driver side mirror. There he saw Numbuh Five holding onto the corner of the truck. "Kids! What are they doing?" He grabbed his radio. "This is CPS 379 to pick-up station, I've got a couple of kids on my tail. Requesting back up, over."
"Pick-up station to CPS 379, we've locked on your location and are sending back up, over," answered a woman's voice on the radio.
"CPS 379 to pick-up station, shall I alter my route, over?"
"Pick-up station to CPS 379, affirmative. Do not, I repeat, do not allow those kids to intercept the parcel, over."
"CPS 379, out." The truck driver grit his teeth and clutched the steering wheel, making a hard left turn just before approaching Gallagher Elementary School.
"Whoa!" Numbuh 5 exclaimed as she was almost tossed from the truck, but managed to hold on. "Dang! Suckuh knows we're on here!"
"And he's changed his course," Numbuh One observed. "He'll have sent for back-up, so we need to move quickly." They each pulled out a L.A.S.E.R. (Little Arms Saw-through Enemy Rear) and pulled the trigger. About ten tiny arms with various cutting utensils attached to the L.A.S.E.R. started whirring and pressed against the backdoor to the CPS truck. The gizmos began cutting through the metal. "This door is steel-plated, but the L.A.S.E.R. should do the job. Ouch!"
Suddenly an envelope came flying at Numbuh One and cut his hand, causing him to drop the L.A.S.E.R. "What was- Yeow!" Numbuh Five cried out in surprise as an envelope hit her hand as well, leaving them both L.A.S.E.R.less. "We're under attack!" There were three more delivery trucks behind them, the nearest of which was firing mail at the operatives.
"Numbuh Two, we need help!" Numbuh One called into the communicator pinned to his collar.
A few seconds later, Numbuh Two responded, "I'm on it, Numbuh One." Above, Numbuh Two in the F.L.I.B.I.K.E. maneuvered over the street trying to lock onto the trucks. "Almost…. Locked on target! Fire!" He pressed the triggers, and the cannons at the front of the ship began to discharge-.
"Doggy bones?" Numbuh 5 wondered aloud.
Within a mile-radius of the chase scene, the noses of dogs perked up and tongues were flung from their canine mouths as they gave chase for the beefy treats. When they had reached the scene, every pug, poodle, and beagle caught sight of the delivery truck; mouths foamed and hackles raised.
"Take that, stupid kids! Don't you know tampering with the mail is a federal offense!" one of the pursuing CPS truck drivers laughed as he fired postcards and bills at Numbuhs One and Five. Suddenly he found doggy bones were raining on his truck. "What's this?" he asked, reaching out his window to catch one. When he saw the dogs gaining ground on him, his eyes widened. "No! Not the dogs!" He began madly steering the truck around to evade the rabid pets, but to no avail. The dogs caught up, leaping in through his open windows and causing him to run off the road.
"Nice job, Numbuh Two!" Numbuh One complimented.
"That's one down and two to- wah! Hey!" Numbuh Two exclaimed. One of the two remaining CPS trucks had unleashed a barrage of letters on the F.L.I.B.I.K.E. "Commencing evasive action," he declared, dodging the attacks. "Haha! Losers!" Then a cannon appeared on the top of the truck and fired at him. "A brown paper package? If it's tied up in strings, it's one of my favorite things!" Numbuh Two laughed. However, the package landed on the windshield, a small timer visible on the side of the box. "What's-? Oh, no!" The timer hit zero and the package exploded.
"Waaaaah!" Numbuh 2 screamed as the F.L.I.B.I.K.E. went soaring through the air. Numbuh Two ejected from the vehicle and floated down underneath a parachute in the distance.
"Numbuh Two!" Numbuh Five called. "Now what, Numbuh One? Do we abort the mission?"
"Negative, Numbuh Five. We have to stop this delivery!" Numbuh One answered. The cannon on the CPS truck turned around and aimed at them.
"Um, Numbuh Five recalls a saying something on the lines of, 'you can't win 'em all,'" Numbuh Five responded.
"Words of wisdom to be sure," Numbuh One changed his tone, readying himself to jump from the truck.
"Don't give up just yet!" Numbuh One's eyes widened as he heard Numbuh Four's voice over his communicator. He looked up and spotted a soda bomb missile come up behind one of the trucks. A few seconds later the truck burst into flames and swerved off the road.
"Numbuh Four?" he asked.
"Hi, Numbuh One!" Numbuh Three greeted. Numbuh One looked down the road behind them and saw Numbuh Three balanced on the back of the remaining half of the M.O.P.E.D. as Numbuh Four steered it down the street, quickly gaining ground on the remaining CPS truck.
"Well, whaddaya know?" Numbuh Five grinned.
"Numbuh Four, we've lost our L.A.S.E.R.s. Did any of your weapons survive the crash?" Numbuh One asked.
"We don't have any weapons, Numbuh One," Numbuh Four answered. "That was our last missile."
"Don't worry, Numbuh One! I've got a plan!" Numbuh Three added.
"You- Numbuh Three what are you planning?" Numbuh One asked.
"Relax, Numbuh One. Just you and Numbuh Five climb up on top of the truck," Numbuh Four instructed.
"Over and out!" Numbuh Three finished.
"Wait, Numbuh Three!" Numbuh One exclaimed, but the signal cut out. He looked over at Numbuh Five.
"Numbuh Five thinks whatever they're planning, we should probably climb on up there anyway," she said.
"Right," Numbuh One agreed.
"All right, you ready, Numbuh Three?" Numbuh Four asked.
"Ready!" she answered. Numbuh Four steered the M.O.P.E.D. over to the right side of the truck.
"Okay, let's do this," he said. Numbuh Three stepped up onto his shoulders, and when she was stable Numbuh Four balanced himself and cupped his hands in front of his face. Then Numbuh Three placed her foot in his palm. "One, two."
"Three!" Numbuh Three finished, and Numbuh Four tossed her up. Numbuh Three flew through the air for a moment before landing on top of the CPS truck. Once she found her footing, Numbuh Three turned to look at the cannon that had fired the bomb at Numbuh Two. There was, as she and Numbuh Four had hoped, a camera on top of it so that the driver could see his target. "Oh, Mr. Mailman!" she called to it. The camera turned in her direction. "Look at me! I'm on top of your truck and trying to help my friends!" she taunted it.
The cannon finally turned and aimed at her, firing a smaller package bomb. Numbuh Three dodged its first shot and moved to the other side of the truck. "Ooh, you're gonna have to do better than that if you wanna get rid of my friends and me!" she goaded it. The cannon fired again and again, but Numbuh Three dodged it, finally moving to the front of the truck. "Come on! You gotta do better than that!" she mocked, glancing back over her shoulder to be sure that Numbuhs One and Five had made it to the top of their truck and that she was in the right position. "Come on, hit me!" she demanded of the cannon.
The cannon obeyed and fired another small explosive at her. Numbuh Three sidestepped it once again, but this time the bomb flew forward at the delivery truck in front of them, the one with their target. Upon impact with the back of the truck, the bomb combusted, blowing out the door. Numbuhs One and Five caught their balance again and realized the door was gone. "Excellent work, Numbuh Three!" Numbuh One called before he and Numbuh Five climbed into the back of the truck to retrieve their objective. "There it is!" Numbuh One pointed to a crate in the corner of the truck. Numbuh Five went forward and took hold of the carton, bringing it back to Numbuh One and the back door. "Nicely done, team. Mission accomplished," Numbuh One declared. "Let's go, Numbuh Five!"
"You got it, chief," she answered as they each pulled out a grappling hook from their belts. Spotting a streetlight, they launched the hooks and swung out of the truck by way of the lamppost.
"Yay!" Numbuh Three cheered from her position atop the truck as it passed by Numbuhs One and Five.
"All right! Come on back down, Numbuh Three!" Numbuh Four called.
"Okey-day!" Numbuh Three answered. She walked over to the side and prepared to jump back to the M.O.P.E.D. Looking up as they passed Hendrie Middle School, Numbuh Three laughed, "Lookit, Numbuh Four! There's our school!"
Inside the truck, the driver, disgusted, growled, "Stupid brats!" He looked up at the monitor from the cannon-camera and smirked when he saw Numbuh Three's distractedness. Suddenly he turned the wheel and made a hard right turn. Numbuh Four cried out as he slammed on the brakes of the M.O.P.E.D. to avoid a collision.
"Whoa! Aah!" Numbuh Three screamed as she flew off to the left side of the truck, falling off the edge.
"Gotcha!" the driver exclaimed, reaching out his window and grabbing her by the arm. He pulled her inside and threw her through a window in the back of the cab into the back of the truck.
"Numbuh Three!" Numbuh Four cried. He grit his teeth and started the M.O.P.E.D. up again, speeding after the truck.
"Hahahaha!" the driver laughed at his hostage. Numbuh Four appeared in the driver side mirror, gaining speed on him. "Oh, no you don't," the driver said, stepping down on the gas.
"Get back 'ere, you!" Numbuh Four shouted, increasing speed as well. Finally he caught up and pulled the M.O.P.E.D. up alongside the right side of the truck again. Carefully he stood up and, after balancing himself, leapt to the truck and opened the cab door, allowing the M.O.P.E.D. to topple to the street. "All right, you! Give back Numbuh Three!"
"What are you doing, you bratty kid? Get out of my truck!" the driver ordered.
"You invited me in here by kidnapping Numbuh Three! Now give her back!" Numbuh Four demanded, leaping on the truck driver, throwing his fists at him.
"Whoa! Get off of me!" the truck driver exclaimed, trying to throw Numbuh Four off of him. The truck swerved wildly about the street, and Numbuh Four's flailing hit several knobs and handles. "Watch what you're doing!" Finally the insanity in the cab made its way to a large red button, which, upon pressing, caused a voice to come over the radio.
"Self-destruct in twenty seconds. Nineteen. Eighteen."
"Oh, no! You stupid kid!" the driver exclaimed, shoving the door open and leaping out into the street.
"Oh, great!" Numbuh Four groaned. He yanked open the window to the back of the truck. "Numbuh Three! Hurry up and get out of there!" he called, reaching his arm inside. Numbuh Three grabbed his arm, and he pulled her through into the cab. Numbuh Four looked out the window and saw the driver sprawled over the pavement. "No jumping out of moving vehicles for us!" he declared, finding the emergency brake and giving it a good yank."
"Eleven. Ten. Nine."
The truck finally screeched to a stop. "Come on!" Numbuh Four grabbed Numbuh Three by the wrist and tugged her out the passenger door out to the street. About two seconds later, the two were flung to the ground as the truck exploded.
"Ow…" Numbuh Three mumbled, sitting up and rubbing her scraped up knees and hands. When Numbuh Four finally sat up again, she looked over and flung her arms around his neck. "Wally! You saved me!"
"Well, yeah," Numbuh Four answered, thrown by her use of his real name and blushing from her close proximity. "I wasn't about to let ya be kidnapped by the mailmen."
"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Numbuh Three squeezed harder and harder.
"Gah! Numbuh Three! My neck isn't indestructible!" He gasped for air, "Neither is my windpipe!"
"Oops. Sorry," Numbuh Three apologized, releasing him. Numbuh Four panted a few seconds, trying to get his lungs functioning again.
"You guys ready to go home?" They looked up to see Numbuhs One, Two, and Five in a M.O.S.Q.U.I.T.T.O.H. Numbuh Five dropped a ladder, and when Numbuhs Three and Four had climbed up, Numbuh Two flew them all back to the tree house. That evening they enjoyed a large fire in their hearth powered by that day's target: a case of new copies of Romeo and Juliet, intended to be delivered to the kids' middle school.
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Romeo and Juliet, eh? I wonder where this is going? Stay tuned to find out!