Elliot's POV
Here we are now, at a bar, celebrating the latest case we closed. When Munch first came to me and said, "let's go drink", it seemed like a good idea. Now I'm sitting here, facing my co-workers, and thinking, "What the hell are we celebrating? We arrested the bastard, that's true. But that adorable 5-year-old girl will still have to live with the fact that she was brutally raped by her own father." So much to celebrate.
I look at you and you're talking happily to Munch and Fin. You're laughing at a joke. I can see you're probably celebrating the fact that the girl's little sister will be safe from their father. Every once in a while you gaze at me. You're concerned that I'm too quiet lately. You offer me a timid smile and your eyes search mine for answers, but I don't have any. All I have is questions. Questions you'd willing to hear at any time, because you're my best friend. You're my best friend, and yet I don't have the guts to tell you that my marriage is over.
This bar that we came to is some sort of a couple's bar. Our table is the only one with more than two people. You don't seem to have even noticed it as you laugh with Munch and Fin at how much the defense attorney made a fool of himself in court today. The romantic music, though, is hammering in my head.
Come away with me in the night
Come away with me
And I will write you a song
Come away with me on a bus
Come away where they can't tempt us
With their lies
There's nothing more depressing than reflecting about the lyrics of a romantic song when you're all alone. Maybe that's why you've just complained that the music is too loud. Because you're all alone too.
No, Liv. The music isn't too loud. It's our hearts that are screaming for love. I look at you and you're beautiful, even after such a stressful day of work. But that isn't news to me. You've always been breathtaking beautiful, which never seemed to have gotten in the way of our friendship. I used to feel like I could talk to you about anything. But you have your own demons haunting you, and I can't be another one of them.
I watch a young couple dancing. Things are so easier when you're young. You believe that the world has a good future. You believe that love can last forever. However, even if I could turn back time, I don't think I would've done anything different. My marriage is over, and I don't see a way to change this. Oh, you're going to be angry when you find out. You'll be hurt at my lack of trust. And, when that moment comes and I'm feeling my heart beating right up my throat, I won't say it. I won't confess that I'm not sure if my marriage is over because I fell in love with you, or if I fell in love with you because my marriage was over. Either way, you're there, and it's not fair to drop this bomb at you because you never meant for it to happen.
I keep watching the young couple. They're barely moving in the dance floor. They're probably not even hearing the music. I am, though...
I want to walk with you
On a cloudy day
In fields where the yellow grass grows knee-high
So won't you try to come
I reach for my glass of scotch. The lights reflect against my wedding ring and the shining hurts my eyes. I want to tell you that I'm not feeling well and that I'm calling it a night. I know you'd get up immediately, not only because you're my ride tonight, but because you care about me. While we were in the car, you'd be throwing side glances at me, and asking what's wrong. Then I'd tell you what's wrong.
No, I wouldn't. I'd give a shrug and say I'm just tired.
Once I heard that when God created the world, he picked up all the souls and divided them in two. Then, he let them go. The souls traveled through the whole world, and each one settled down somewhere. Suddenly, they realized their other half was missing. And from that day on, each of those souls lived searching their other half, and they wouldn't find true happiness until they were only one again.
Was my other half in front of me all these time? It pains me to realize that she wasn't beside me for the last 20 years.
It feels like this song has been playing forever. Maybe someone has cast a spell over me, and now I'm condemned to live this moment forever. I'm pretty sure about the spell part, at least. The young couple – they moved. She raised her head from his chest. I see parks flying around as their eyes meet.
Or was it when I turned your way and our eyes met?
Come away with me and we'll kiss
On a mountaintop
Come away with me
And I'll never stop loving you
I'm guessing you felt the same thing I did, because you quickly looked down. Munch and Fin were now engaged in some political discussion, and you're not in the mood for one. You take your glass to your mouth, but you're just pretending to drink. You need something to do.
Silence can speak a million words.
You cross your arms over the table. "You're awfully quiet tonight." One of us had to say something. "Is everything ok?" I can see you're starting to reach for my hand, and I don't know if it's something in my eyes, but you suddenly stop. I want to scream that nothing is ok, and you're the only one that can me it ok for me right now, but obviously I don't do that. Lately, I've been losing my ability to speak quite often when I'm near you. You don't wait much for my answer. "You want to go home?" You ask, always the good friend. You don't know that you're talking me to an empty house. Empty not only for the lack of people, but mainly for the lack of love. "Yeah, I want to go home." I finally say it. And I mean it more than you can understand right now.
And I want to wake up with the rain
Falling on a tin roof
While I'm safe there in your arms
So all I ask is for you
To come away with me in the night
Come away with me
I toss a couple of twenties at the table and we leave. It's a quiet walk to your car. When we arrive, I'm waiting by the passenger's door for you to get in and open it for me. However, you're standing right in front of me. Your hand squeezes my arm and I feel assured. I was wrong, you understand. You're also searching for your other half.
A/N: 1. The song used in this fic is "Come Away With Me", by Norah Jones. This is my first SVU fic so I have no idea if this is any good - reviews will be much appreciated.
Olivia's POV is coming soon...