(A/N: I have no idea where this is gonna go, or anything. I'm writing it because I got bored with my other one. So bear with me…

I do think that this one is going to be a lot shorter than the other one. And I don't own Harry Potter, nor do I reserve any rights to the vague Napoleon Dynamite references, of which there are only a few.)

Summer at the Burrow

Harry was asleep at one of his two favorite places on earth… the Burrow.

Peacefully sleeping, silently dreaming… he turned over in his sleep, now lying on his back.

But then he saw something.

He concentrated in his dream. What was that? Even while he slept, he wondered. A bright and steadily growing light, it seemed… what was it… it was going to hit him… this didn't look good… he started to panic… omigod it was so close! Crap! Oh Merlin it was gonna hit him it was gonna hit him IT WAS GONNA HIT HIM and then…

"TRAAIIINN!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" Harry screamed as he woke up suddenly and, frankly, quite violently. Two identical and hysterically laughing redheaded guys were standing over his bed, holding the muggle flashlight that Harry had brought over his face.

Harry, gasping for breath, gestured to the twin holding the electric torch to turn it off.

"Blinded—… by— the light," Harry choked out.

From downstairs came the voice of Mrs. Weasley. "Boys, are you all right? Harry, is everything okay? Fred, George, you haven't done anything to Harry, have you?"

The twins ignored her. One turned off the flashlight, and the other twin said, in between convulsions of laughter, "Sorry, Harry mate, but we— we had to, see— when we found this thing we couldn't resist and— and— oh, bugger it all! It was funny!"

Harry didn't move, or say a word. That was because, seeing as how he had nearly just peed himself, talking— oh, heck, breathing was proving difficult at that moment. Which brought Harry to his next point. After he had gotten his breath back somewhat, he managed to choke out, "Why?"

"Well, Mum wanted Ron to tell you that breakfast's ready, but he couldn't wake you up. Seems you were mumbling something about a certain Ravenclaw—"

At this the other one snickered.

"—and he didn't want to wake you," the twin— George?— concluded.

"And so we took matters into our own hands," the other said gleefully.

Harry sighed. Although the event had nearly given him a heart attack, he thought, It was kind of funny… probably took ten years off my life, but… funny, I guess.

"…Oh," said Harry, as he tried to slow his breathing. "Next time, leave it… leave it to Ron."

"Aw, Ickle Ronnikins? Nah, he's too much of a wotchy git to ever wake anyone up," the twin whom Harry now believed to be Fred said in a sarcastic tone.

And, of course, exactly at that moment, Ron entered the room. Naturally, he heard what Fred said, and turned red like the wotchy git he apparently was.

"I am― I am not a wotchy git!" Ron said furiously.

"Oh, come off it, Ronnikins, of course you are," Fred said nonchalantly.

After staring at the two for a second, Ron evidently decided that it wasn't worth fighting over. And more importantly, there was absolutely no way he could win. Not against those two. If he tried to defy them, guaranteed he would wake up the next morning as a giant toenail clipping or something disgusting like that.

So instead of fighting it out, he said, trying to be calm, "Harry, it's time for breakfast. Come on, then," and grabbed Harry's arm to attempt to get him downstairs. But unluckily for Harry, Fred and George got a hold of his other arm.

Ripping him out of bed (and in the process, possibly dislocating his shoulder), the twins dragged Harry down the stairs. Literally.

"Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow OW OW OW OW OW!" Harry shouted fruitlessly as Fred and George dragged him down the stairs and into the kitchen.

"Look who we found!" Fred said cheerily, holding up one of Harry's legs.

"Ow," Harry said one last time, just for effect, as Ron ran into the room behind them.

Mrs. Weasley rushed over and shouted, "FRED!"

"Hey, he did it too!" Fred said, pointing to George. George stared at him for a second, then immediately dropped Harry's other leg and sprinted up the stairs. Fred took one glance at his mum's seething glare and followed suit, shouting, "WAIT UP!" A second later, a door slammed upstairs, and from what the listeners in the kitchen (consisting of Harry, Ron, Ginny, Bill, Percy, and Mr. Weasley) could tell, someone started trying to break the door down. Apparently it was Fred, because a second later, he shouted, "George, you git! Let me in! I think I broke my nose!"

George's voice, slightly muffled from being in his room, replied, "It's called stopping before you run into things! Or possibly even slowing down!"

"Well, I didn't know there was going to be a door there! Let me in!"

"No! And you know, I can see you looking in through the keyhole."

"Well, what are you going to do about it?"

There was a slight pause, and then, "AAAAUUUUGHHHHH! MY EYE! THAT'S NOT WHAT WANDS ARE FOR, YOU GIT!"

The kitchen was totally silent as the beholders of this amazingly spederific event listened to this. They heard the door slowly creak open, and George's voice, "You all right there, Fred? Let me see your eye―" There was an odd exclamation of horror as George apparently looked at Fred's eye. "Look at that! It's got to be the size of a bloody Bludger by now!"

"Or as big as your―"

"It's huge!"

"―ego!" Fred finished. "it's bloody huge! Were you trying to poke my eye out?"

"Yes."

The following sequence of events was extremely odd. It went something like this:

"I hate you!"

"I hate you more!"

"Well, you're a giant waffle!"

"What! What are you talking about? Are you feeling all right? Fred, did you drink coffee right before you went to sleep again? You know that makes you hallucinate!"

A small explosion

"Ha! Now you're a giant waffle!"

"Turn me back, you nark!"

"HAHAHA! NO!"

"Well, then, you're a llama named Tina!"

"Nuh-uh!"

Another small explosion

"AAAH! You turned me into a woman!"

"Yep!"

"I thought you said you were gonna turn me into a llama named Jacqueline!"

"Tina."

"Whatever. I'm a woman!"

"It took you that long to notice?"

"No, you git!"

At this point, Mrs. Weasley decided that she had had enough. "FRED AND GEORGE, GET DOWN HERE NOW!" she shouted, startling everyone else out of their rapt oblivion (yes, oxymoron, I know) to all but the twins' bickering. "I SAID NOW!"

A huge waffle with George's legs and a woman with Fred's clothes on walked into the kitchen a few moments later. The waffle actually kind of shuffled, because it was so wide that it wouldn't have fit into two doorways.

"Yes, mum?" the woman inquired with a grin.

Mrs. Weasley just stared, dumbstruck, but everyone else started laughing hysterically.

This is going to be an interesting summer, Harry thought happily.