Bob smiled as he led his children into the mall. They had been sulking, but not anymore, because he had stepped in to play…super dad! His smile widened as he picked up his 6-year-old son and held his 10-year-old daughters hand this would be simple.

Helen, due to a slight slip in mental capabilities due to the children and any related stress, refused to handle them today. She had opted for the spa, leaving Bob with a note of explanation, but he hadn't minded at all. On the contrary he was excited to spend time with the kids. Helen got to spend tons of time with them and he got dumped with the quick 'love you dad's', not today!

The glass door swung open and both children gasped. The mall was swarming with people and the children's reactions were dynamic. Dash kicked his legs super speeds and pointed at different shops while speaking utter nonsense. Violet on the other hand clung to his arm with an untapped strength and stared with wide eyes at an older couple that were pointing at them. But Bob unaware to either was pointing down the stream of people.

"Who wants to ride the escalator?" He boomed out and the replies were simultaneous.

"Oh-oh-me, me, me, me, me! I wanna'-oh can we? That would be soooooo cool-then we could go up, then down, then up, then down!" Dash lurched on Bobs shoulders while Violets voice gave her own opinion.

"Are you kidding? Look at all those people! We'd have to fight our way to them, can we just go over…" Violet twisted as far around as she could without letting go. Finding a store that made her less claustrophobic she pointed, "We could go there. Why not there huh? Mom likes, umm," She squinted a the writing, "Ree-straws."

Bob gave a loud laugh and clamped down on Dash's legs. "Ristras, honey, those," He pointed to the dried chilies, and lifting Violet off the ground with the arm, "are ristras. I would also like to take this moment to say, if we have to fight our way down remember," Bob struck as dramatic of a pose as possible while holding a jet on your shoulders, "I'm Mr. Incredible, and I'm fighting with you!" The color drained from Violet's face as she pictured bodies being tossed around, while Dash's brightened.

"Dad-dad! That would be soooo cool!" Bob laughed at both of them.

"I'm joking you two, now lets go to the food court, I'm famished." Violet brightened and Dash groaned. However they both caught the others eye and silently asked what 'famished' meant then began to move with their father. Bob paused only to think which way was faster. With the crowd and the long way, or against the crowd directly to the court?

Choosing the latter they began fighting the crowd to make it to the other side. Dash screamed things into his ear and Violet was almost lost to the crowd more than once. Bob sighed, "This isn't working. Alright you up-sa-daisy!" He lifted his arm, once again separating Violet and the ground, and swung her into his arms. With this new set up Bob nodded his head and all but charged through the crowd to the food court. "Now the real challenge. Where are we going to eat?"

Violet smiled and pointed to the Panda Express while Dash's hand quickly pointed in the opposite direction to the Pizza Palace. Both children glared at the other and Violet was the first to speak up.

"We had to go to the restaurant he wanted last night!" She put an extra emphasis on 'he' and smirked.

"She's got you there kiddo, what are you going to say?" Bob asked as he looked up at his son.

"Well we had to eat what she wanted to this morning!" His emphasis was on 'she' and Bob shook his head.

"But you know that rule doesn't apply to what we eat at home!" Dash grumbled and tried to think hard. "Alright," Bob started eyeing his own restaurant, "How would you guys like to go somewhere that you can eat all the food you want for 5.99?" Both children gave out protests as Bob crossed to the only buffet line there. "Oh cut that out you two! They have Chinese pizza here!"

Violet scrunched her nose and peaked over her fathers arm. "Chinese pizza?" Bob nodded while Dash leaned forward and forced Bob's left eye closed.

"That's right Chinese pizza!" He then pointed to the egg roles that were stuffed with pizza sauce and cheese. The children looked at it skeptically and the roles shone in their grease filled glory. "Now we can all get what we want. It's Chinese, it's pizza, and I can grab as many as I want without spending over a hundred dollars!" Neither of the kids got the joke as Bob gave a hearty laugh. "Now I'm hungry! Let's grab us some food!" Bob put both children down with ease and paid for them. He then grabbed two trays and started down the line.

Bob felt quiet proud of himself as they all sat down, both Violet and Dash liked their Chinese pizzas and Bob had quickly cleared them out of those. This wasn't too bad; Helen just must not know how to deal with them.

Just the day before.

"Dash! Do not, I repeat, do not hit your sister! And Violet please don't hit your brother! Wait, Violet where's Dash." Behind Helen there's a large bang and Dash tumbles out of the kitchen charred. The alarms in their house go off and Helen decides that she should just have automatic sprinklers installed as she grabs the nearby and faithful extinguisher.

Present day with out alarms.

Yeah, she just doesn't know how to give them a little slack. Bob looks at his kids and says, "I bet I could down the rest of the drink." He then points to the 42-ounce soda that hasn't been touched.

"No way!" Both the children say as Dash steals one of Violet's pizzas without her noticing.

"Yeah way!" Bob shouts and grabs the drink. He pops the top off and removes the straw. "I can do it all in one go! Ice and everything!"

"And everything?" Dash asks amazed. Violet takes the opportunity to steal one of his pizzas and unwittingly gets back her original.

"And everything! You ready? In five, four, three, two, one, yes!" Bob quickly lifted the soda to his mouth and does as promised. The soda and ice are gone in a matter of seconds and Bob slams the empty container on the table. With a burning throat and watery eyes he looks up to see he's done as he hoped. Dash and Violet are amazed and they try to see how can down more in one go. With this distraction Bob wipes some tears away, never again.

Dash gave a laugh of triumph as he wins the contest and Bob clears his throat. "So?" Bob's voice cracks as he continues, "How about that shopping?" The children's eyes grew wide and in half a second Bob found that they were dragging him along shouting out different stores.

"Macy's!" Violet said looking at a dress

"EB Games!" Dash said while staring at Blood and Guts IV

"Or the Science Shop!" Bob tried seeing the neatest telescope. Both children paused.

"Nah," was the vote. Well, Bob couldn't say he didn't try.

"How about Hasbrin Toy's Galore?" Dash asked face pressed against the glass.

"Brookston!" Violet exclaimed staring enviously at the studio headphones in the window.

"Or…How about there!" Bob said his eyes alight. They all stopped to look across at Games, Clothes, and More. Dash gave his Bob's hair a slight tug of agreement and Violet oohed at it. "I'm on a roll!" Bob laughed as he crossed to the shop. Once by the door Violet ran off in one direction and Dash in the other. "Whoa! Hey you two get back…here?" And like a flamingo in the arctic, they were gone.

Bob looked in the direction Violet went and craned his neck to see if he could spot Dash behind a display. No good, they had vanished. With a grumble Bob slapped his forehead, how had he forgotten rule number three hundred twelve? Never, ever let go of your children's appendages or limbs. Bob turned to were Dash had ran, Violet was slightly more responsible than her brother and that meant find Dash before security. With a thud Bob's feet began to follow Dash.

It wasn't hard to follow the trail left behind him. Dash had been so excited that a lot of the toys and displays were toppled over in his rush. People were complaining and the manager was furious. That's when he heard Dash's trademark 'cool'! He turned into what looked like a war zone. Teddy bears were strewn about the floor, guns lay on the floor, and a red light special gave it the red lighting needed. Bob's feet barley made any noise as he crept along. A rustle to the left made Bob turn that way and be tackled from behind.

Dash had donned an army hat and had a fake gun, still connected to it's cardboard. Dash's voice rose as he shouted bang and jumped off the stunned man. Bob reached out his hand in the last moment to get Dash's foot, successfully stopping the maniac. Bob opened his mouth to scold his son when a shriek of terror came across the way. With Dash still hanging upside down by his ankle Bob ran around the corner in time to find a female worker throwing things at Violet who dove underneath a display. Violet was breathing hard and flashing in and out of view. Bob ripped the toys off of Dash and grabbed Violet.

"Shopping time is over!" Bob shouted running back into the thicket of people. Violet under one arm and Dash slung over the other Bob ran from the manager who screamed and shouted at them from a distance. Right, left, he slid under a bench, making that his most flexible moment. Around the palm tree and over the…railing. It hit Bob a second to late that he had just jumped down to the second level. The floor cracked at the 250+lbs. hit the ground. Not wasting a second to nurse his aching legs he ran out an emergency exit. Past another security guard and straight to his car, Bob practically threw his children into the opposite window before he hopped in and drove as fast as he could back to their house.

A couple of groans came from the backseat as Violet and Dash slowly sat up and got buckled.

"Dad," Dash began, "You are sooooo much cooler than mom when we go to the mall!"

"You were crazy!" Violet said with wide eyes.

"Well," Bob began making sure that no mall cops were following them on a golf cart; "Parents do crazy things for their kids. That includes, but does not stop at, running from mall security and jumping a story to the ground. Now how about we never speak of this to your mother huh?" Both children gave a nod and they shared a nervous laugh. At least Helen wouldn't know.

About thirty minuets later they had reached the house and Bob gave them a warning glance. "Honey! We're back!" Bob shouted to his wife.

"Oh good! You know they just had this news bulletin," Helen said stretching her head to the kitchen doorway, "about this crazy dad and his two children. They ran amuck at the mall and security lost them." She gave a laugh, "I thought that was something! Can you imaging them getting chased by mall cops?" Helen laughed some more as her head disappeared. Bob, Violet, and Dash gave painful laughs and looked at each other in a panic. "So," Helen began again, "How was your trip to the mall?"

"Fine." All three sputtered at once.