I was lying in the lot thinking about all the things that had happened the past months. In my head pictures kept tumbling round, pictures of those who were gone now. Johnny as he sat on our sofa smoking and laughing, Johnny in that hospital bed dying. From there my thoughts went to Dallas, tough uncaring Dally who never loved anyone, who couldn't love. But that was so wrong, he did love, he loved Johnny, so much that he died for him.

As I looked up at the blue spring sky I remembered clearly the light blue colour of Dallys icy eyes. He was so young, the same age as me, but he had seen so much more than me, been through so much more. He was cold and wicked, but he was my friend, and I liked him, even though I'm not to sure that he liked me that much. We had been around each other for most of our teenage life though and we respected each other.

Dallas eyes never smiled and danced like Soda's or grew serious and thoughtful like Pony's or even angry like Steve's, his eyes were always just cold. There were so many kids eyes I had seen like that, greasers and socs alike. I came to think about the Shepard boys, they were cold and grim like Dally, more hoods than greasers. I could see them in my mind, there black shiny hair and hard black eyes. Why didn't anybody care that there eyes were so cold, why didn't anybody care that they probably would die in jail within a couple of years.

As the clouds moved over the sky I laid there thinking of how our lives had changed with the death of Dally and Johnny. My brothers all tried to be normal and go about their regular routine. Soda and Darry did it for Pony's sake and Pony did it not to worry the rest of us. I did it to, at home I was normal, I talked with my brothers, helped Pony with his homework and did the dishes. But I was often by my self now, I never talked with my friends anymore, except for Steve and Two bit, I felt like all I really needed was time to my self to try and work trough my grief alone. I knew my brothers did the same in their own way.

When the sun began to set and I started to get cold I got up and began walking aimlessly around the east side until I ended up at the Dingo.

I sat down at an empty table still deep in thoughts. I had probably been sitting there for a while when I heard some guys come in walking to the table next to mine, I looked up at them noticing it was Tim Shepard and company. He didn't notice me so I began studying the tablecloth once again.

This really wasn't a good day, today more then ever did I miss them, I would have given anything to have Johnny and Dally sitting here with me, smoking and harassing the waitresses. Then it hit me, Tim and Dally were somewhat friends to, he must miss him to, as much as a hardened hood could miss another hood. I looked over to his table to see him saying something to one of the guys who were with him. His face looked like it was cut in stone, every line sharp, his eyes cold and piercing. The other guy laughed and nodded at what he'd said. He must have noticed me looking at him because he turned around, his eyes searching mine, but I quickly lowered mine to the table again.

"Hey Curtis."

I looked up to see Shepard standing there, I didn't say anything just nodded at him. He must have taken that as an invite because he sat down across from me. I could feel his eyes on me but I didn't want to meet them, frankly he scared me, he had always scared me a little. I don't know weather it was his looks, his eyes and that long scar that ran down the left side of his face or if it was the way he was talking and acting.

"You ok Curtis?"

I nodded and looked up at his face, he was smirking a tiny bit, just a curve on the corner of his mouth, but his eyes weren't, they were emotionless and looked at me with their piercing stare. I just nodded again and was just about to lower my eyes again when I saw that his eyes weren't black, they were a dark shade of blue. Strange, I was sure his eyes were black, I have seen him enough times to know the colour of his eyes. Goes to show how little I knew about the people I grew up around.

"Your brothers coming to pick you up?" He asked and smiled at me, a wide grin that showed of his straight white teeth. I couldn't help but smile back as I shook my head no, that smile reminded me of Soda. I had never seen Shepard smile before, come to think of it he had usually been angry every time I had seen him around my brothers or friends.

"Well," he said getting up, "I will be sitting over there, just tell me when you want to go and I'll drive you home". He went over to his friends and I sank down in thoughts once more.

A couple of hours probably went by with me sitting there thinking and ripping a napkin into shreds before I noticed the diner was quiet. I looked around me to see Shepard sitting alone at his table looking at me, he smiled a brief smile and got up.

He stood leaning over me like a tall, dark tower, and I couldn't help but feel kind of scared of him, he really looked intimidating. He must have noticed my reaction because he took a step backwards to give me more space.

"Come on I'll drive you home now," he said and started walking to the door. Suddenly I got really scared that he would just leave me there so I got up and followed him to his car.