Wicked Little Town

Part 2

SBxRL

By Khavi

Forgive me for I did not know

'cause I was just a boy

you were so much more

than any god could ever plan

more than a woman or a man

now I understand

how much I took from you

Sirius Black had never felt so utterly exhausted in his whole life. Not the day after the 'After OWLs' party. Not after the midnight romps with Mooney, Prongs, and Wormtail. Not even after the first time he'd had sex. This was the kind of tired that clawed at your bones and pulled at your flesh, absolutely demanding that you obey it's command or risk a concussion when you collapsed.

The reason he was so tired was simple. He'd spent the past 2 1/2 days in Hogsmead trying to get over a bad LSD trip. The drug had made him see things that weren't there and had made him pretty sick for about a day after. Of course, he was lucky to have a friend with him who was willing to stay by his side the whole time and rub his back as he vomited all over the grass. And street. And prissy Ravenclaw girls.

Sirius smiled in remembrance as he stretched out on the overstuffed couch in the Gryffindor Common room. The couch springs squeaked in protest to his weight as he rolled over to look at the fire. He knew he should probably get up to the dorm with the others, but he couldn't convince himself to leave his perch. James was probably already in bed, dreaming about Lily Evens while Peter snored away in the bed next to him. Sirius considered what Remus, his other best mate, was probably doing.

Remus had been looking off color all weekend and Sirius was curious as to why. His canis-like friend was usually fit as an Ox, and just as hard working. But he'd been paler than usual the past few days, and Sirius would have sworn he was running a fever. The dark haired boy rolled over and sat up. He should go check on Remus, just to make sure he was ok. After all, Remus was there with him 24/7 at Hogsmead.

Sirius quietly treaded up the stone stairs to the 7th year boys rooms. The heavy wooden door creaked a little as he pushed it open, making him wince. After a quick scan of the room, he determined that he hadn't woken any of the other occupants. James and the three other 7th years were sleeping when Sirius closed the door and crept over to his bed. He paused when he saw Remus' was empty.

Sirius was quick to spot the blonde man standing by the tower window, gazing at the moon. His skin was pasty in the light, his eyes were bloodshot and rimmed with dark circles. Remus didn't appear to notice Sirius as he came up behind him. Sirius lay down on Remus' bed and looked at him quizzically.

"Not tired, mate?" he asked, stretching his legs out on the soft down comforter that Remus kept on his bed. He wriggled his toes and rubbed the sole's of his feet against the fabric contently as he awaited Remus' reply.

"No...I am. I just can't sleep..." the blonde murmured, glancing down at his long haired friend.

Sirius could see a tiny tremor pass through Remus as he stood outlined by the pale moon light...The moon! Sirius quickly looked at it and saw it was swelling to almost complete fullness. He felt like kicking himself. He was such a berk! No wonder Remus wasn't his usual self!

The moon would be full soon. Remus always got sick around that time and being out all day and night with Sirius probably didn't help. In fact, he looked awful. His hair was hanging limply around his face, his skin was almost lucid so Sirius could see his veins and he was trembling, trying to keep himself up by placing a hand on the window pane.

"Remus, " Sirius began, sitting up, "you should lie down. You don't look to good, mate."

Remus nodded, but didn't make a move to get to his bed. Instead, he sort of jerked forward and fell to his knees. Sirius jumped to see what was wrong and saw his best friend dry heaving on the floor. He realized that Remus must not have eaten at all the day before, and he dropped down next to him, trying to comfort the blonde. He looked about for a towel or glass of water but didn't see either in the darkened room. Cursing under his breath, he went back to kneeling next to his sick friend. Remus lurched a little and threw both hands against the floor to steady himself. Sirius winced at the sporadic-ness of the movements.

When he reached out to touch Remus though, the shorter man swatted his hand away. Remus' golden eyes burned as he looked at Sirius, as if to say Don't you dare feel sorry for me. I won't allow it, Sirius. It was hard to watch his friend in pain and not be able to help him, but Sirius knew enough to know that Remus would not accept his help without asking for it first.

And when everything starts breaking down

you take the pieces off the ground

and show this wicked town

something beautiful and new

Remus coughed violently and clutched at his throat, trying not to make a commotion. Sirius was relieved when the other man reached for him, silently asking for his help. The brunette wrapped his arm under Remus' and around his torso and hoisted him to his feet. He carefully led the werewolf to his bed and sat him down. Trying to be supportive, he took the blonds hand in his and began rubbing his palm with his thumb like he used to when the change was particular painful.

The hand massage had always relaxed Remus' muscles, allowing for a less painful change, and days before. Sirius had learned the trick from his older cousin Andromeda(1). When Sirius was sick, she used to take his hand and rub it the way he was doing for Remus now. It had always made him feel safe and sleepy and happy.

"Shhh..." Sirius murmured, rubbing gently. He felt Remus begin to relax and smiled a little. Remus leaned his head against Sirius' arm, confirming Sirius' fear about a fever.

"Thanks, Sirius..." Remus whispered hoarsely. He lowered his eyes; finally allowing the exhaustion he'd been feeling for days, affect him

"Hey, what are friends for, eh?" he replied, looking at the blonde.

Remus was leaning fully against him now, and Sirius knew sleep was taking him. He carefully helped Remus into a laying position and was about to go, when he felt a firm grip on his arm. He looked down and saw that Remus was clinging to him, an odd look on his face.

"Please...don't go. Can't you...just say here a while?" he asked timidly. "You...you know. Like when we were kids? I don't...want to be alone right now..." Remus tried awkwardly to explain. Another shudder passed through him, making him look vulnerable and child-like.

Sirius nodded and sat back down beside him. He took Remus' hand and kissed his palm, hoping that in his fevered state, the blond wouldn't mind the contact. "Of course mate."

Remus looked relieved and lay his head back down against the feather pillow. A small sweat had broken out across his face, making his hair stick to his face. Sirius felt uncomfortable just sitting there and wondered if Remus would mind if he lay down next to him. He shifted a little and leaned back against the headboard, eyes closing a little.

This was just like when they were kids and got homesick. One would always crawl in bed with the other and they'd talk about how much school sucked and how much they missed home. Only, this time they were older. And Remus was much more developed than his 11 year old self. And Sirius was attracted to him.

Sighing unhappily, Sirius glanced down at the blond who was resting next to him. Remus was still holding his hand and shaking with fever. Sirius squeezed a little and wiggled further down the bed. Once he was lying next to Remus, he closed his eyes again. He heard Remus whimper in pain and felt the grip in his palm tighten. He wished he could make it stop hurting, but there was nothing to do but stay with Remus and wait for it to pass.

You think that luck has left you there

but maybe there's nothing

up in the sky but air

and there's no mystical design

no cosmic lover pre-assigned

there's nothing you can find

that cannot be found.

Sirius woke the next morning, nose almost touching Remus'. Well...this seemed familiar. Oh. That would be because less than a week ago, he'd woken up to the same scene in a local inn. Of course, that was after he'd been strung out on a Muggle drug. Of course, he hadn't taken waking up next to another man (when he couldn't remember the previous night) very well. Sirius snorted, remembering how childish he had acted.

Remus and he had ended up having their very first real fight that day. Remus had been trying to be a good mate and watch over an intoxicated Sirius, and Sirius had been freaked out about being in a hotel bed with his best friend. Later they sorted it all out and everything went back to normal, which was good. Sirius was not at all fond of brawling with his best mate.

Sirius tried to clear his eyes so he could see Remus more clearly. Some of the color seemed to have returned to Remus' face and he was no longer shaking with chills. Sirius touched his forehead and was pleased to see that the fever had gone down in the night. He yawned and started to sit up. He quickly found, however, that he couldn't. His legs were intertwined with Remus' and his blonde friend's arm was resting across Sirius' stomach.

Sirius sighed. Well, this was awkward. If one of the other boys woke up and saw them together, they would definitely have some explaining to do.

"Oi...Mooney, wake up." He whispered, shaking Remus' shoulder lightly.

The other man slept on soundly, apparently not bothered by the jostling at all. Sirius rolled his eyes and tried again.

"Mooney Mooney Moons..." he sang. "Wake up Sunshine..." Sirius murmured, shaking him again. Remus still didn't wake. He did, however, move closer to Sirius. His legs rubbed against his taller friends, getting dangerously close to his crotch. Sirius bit his lip to stifle the groan that was threatening to escape.

Damnation! he thought angrily, trying to squirm away from the shorter boy. If he didn't get away from the contact, well, he'd be in a very uncomfortable position. Trying once more, he pushed his lower body away from Remus, effectively making his face and torso closer. Remus sighed and opened his eyes, finally waking.

A startled look passed over his face when he saw Sirius. "Er, hullo." he managed, a distressed look on his face.

"Hi." Sirius replied, grinning. Not knowing how to explain why he was so close to Remus, he tried to lighten the mood. "Was it as good for you as it was for me?" he asked, raising an eyebrow suggestively.

Remus looked like he was about to swallow his tongue and Sirius had to stop himself from laughing at the sight. "Wh-what?" Remus sputtered, unable to move himself away from Sirius, who just leaned in closer.

"Remy, you were great. I mean..." he trailed off, trying to be dramatic, "your mouth...so lovely. I should like to taste those lips again..." his voice lowered as he said this. And he knew he was only half kidding.

Remus narrowed his eyes and shoved the brunette, sending him toppling off the bed. "Sod!" Remus called, crawling to the edge of the bed to look over.

Sirius sat on the cold stone floor, an unhappy look on his face. He smiled a little when he saw Remus peeking over the edge to see what he was doing.

"How dare you, sir." Remus continued in his 'holy than thou' voice. "Taking advantage of a sick man. You should be ashamed of yourself."

Giving the best 'how could you even suggest a thing like that, I am so hurt' face he could muster, Sirius looked up at the Wolf. Remus rolled his eyes and moved away from the edge of the bed. Sirius knew he was snuggling back into the comfort of the warm blankets and suddenly felt very cold sitting on the hard stones.

Sitting up, he crept over to the bed and looked over the top to see what his blonde friend was doing. Remus was laying on his side, gazing as Sirius with a 'well, what do you want?' look on his face. Trying his hardest to look pathetic, Sirius tugged on the comforter. Remus swatted his hand and pulled it closer to himself.

"Go away. This is mine." the shorter man said matter-of-factly.

"Oh, come on Remsey, I'm cold." Sirius protested, pulling on it again.

Remus snorted, obviously not impressed. Finally, he moved over and patted the stop next to him. Sirius brightened and hopped into the still warm bed happily. Settling down into it, he sighed contently. Remus grumbled something about him being the one who was sick and needing rest, but Sirius wasn't really listening to him.

After about half an hour of just quietly lying together, Remus began to tap his fingers against the mattress. That was an old habit Sirius recognized as one he did when he was nervous about something. Wondering what it was, Sirius looked over at the blonde questioningly.

"Sirius, mate..." he began, "do you believe in destiny?"

Not knowing what this had to do with anything, Sirius considered. "Well, maybe. I'm more into the Choice concept myself..."

Remus nodded and looked away. Sirius wasn't sure if what he said had somehow offended his friend, so he tried again.

"Why do you ask?"

Cause with all the changes you've been through

It seems the stranger's always you

alone again in some new

wicked little town

"Well, nothing. It's just, if things were determined by choice, couldn't I chose not to be affected by moon cycles?" he asked bitterly. "Couldn't I chose who to love?" he whispered, rolling over and away from the long haired boy.

Sirius felt himself stiffen. Had he really heard that? Were his ears playing tricks on him? That seemed like the most likely explanation. Remus was in love with someone? Sirius quickly ran through a list of possibilities in his head. Well, there was Lily, which would explain why he was bitter about it. There was Bertha Jorkins, who didn't seem at all likely. Heistia Jones, Amelia Bones, Alice Langbridge...None of them seemed like Remus' type.

Then, a horrific thought occurred to Sirius. What if it was one of his cousins! What if Remus was in love with Narcissa or Bellatrix? Sirius might just have to kill himself. He had to know.

"Remus, mate...who...who is it?"

"Who's what?" Remus asked irritably, not bothering to look at Sirius.

"Who are you...er, you know. In love with?"

"What?" Remus demanded, rolling over to face Sirius again. He had an odd expression on his face and was still tapping his fingers incessantly.

Sirius grinned. "Come on mate, who is it?"

Remus rolled his eyes and tried to turn away from Sirius again, but this time Sirius wouldn't let him. He grabbed the other by his shoulders and held him still so he could talk to him face to face. Remus flushed with anger at being held down by his taller friend and snarled at him.

"Let me go, Sirius."

Sirius considered it for a moment before deciding. He smiled wickedly and tightened his hold. "No." he said cockily.

Remus clenched his teeth. "What do you mean 'no'?" he growled. At this point, Sirius had expected Remus to put up some kind of resistance, but he wasn't. The blond was lying passively beneath the taller man.

"Just what I said. No."

Sirius was surprised when Remus bucked under him, almost knocking him aside. He received a quick kick to the stomach, but still didn't release the blonde. He didn't even know why he wouldn't just let him up. Perhaps he just wanted to confirm his thoughts about who Remus was infatuated with. But more likely, he just enjoyed feeling Remus struggling against him. Remus wasn't usually a very physical person, and it was exciting to see him angry enough to change his normally passive behavior every now and then.

"Get the fuck off me before I kill you." he warned, face red with anger.

"Remus, relax. It's a simple question. Just answer."

"If it's so simple, why are you holding me down? Do you just like to feel superior to me? To a werewolf? Would those be your Black genes showing, Sirius?" the blond snarled, jerking away once more.

Sirius was stunned by the accusation. He released Remus and got off the bed, making his way across the room. He didn't get more than a few feet before he spun around and stormed angrily back to the bed where Remus was now sitting. Remus started to rise, but Sirius punched him hard across the jaw. He watched as Remus' head whipped to the side, a ribbon of blood flying from his mouth.

Sirius and James fought like this all the time, but never before had he struck Remus. He felt appalled with himself, but refused to show it. That fucking berk had it coming to him. He watched as Remus touched his mouth with his hand and wiped the blood away. Sirius could clearly see that he had cut the blonde's lip with his ring and that it would scar unless he got it looked at.

Remus turned to look at Sirius and he snarled. "You son of a bitch..." he whispered, getting to his feet. He pushed Sirius as hard as he could, sending him backwards into his chest of belongings. Sirius braced himself against the chest and went after Remus again. Remus, who never fought with anyone, was at a far disadvantage against Sirius, but his anger gave him strength. With all the noise they were making, it was no surprise when the other boys were roused from their sleep.

Sirius was jerked away from Remus, who he'd be wrestling with on the hard floor, by James. James was shouting for Gideon(2) to get Remus and for Peter to get something to clean this mess up with. Sirius struggled against James furiously.

"Let me go, James! Let me go!" He shouted, but James had his arms pinned behind his back and wouldn't release him.

"I won't!" James shouted right back. "What the bloody hell happened here?" he demanded, still holding fast to the struggling Sirius.

Gideon was kneeling on the floor with Remus, trying to stop the bleeding that was coming from his mouth and nose. Remus was glaring at Sirius from where he sat, allowing Gideon to clean him off. He narrowed his eyes and looked away from both James and Sirius.

"Look, I don't know what's wrong with the both of you," James said evenly, finally loosening his grip on Sirius now that he'd stoped fighting, "and I don't care either. You're both 7th years, stop acting like firsties. I'm deducting 20 points from Gryffindor. Each. If I catch you two fighting again, it'll be more." he finished, running a hand through his untidy hair.

James looked over at Remus who was holding a tissue against his lip. "You should get that looked at..." He said, turning and walking out of the dorm. Peter looked after him, and followed, casting glances over his shoulder now and then.

"Er, well..." Gideon began, rising to his feet. " I ought to be going as well..." and with that, he too left the room hastily.

Sirius glanced down at Remus, who was still nursing his injuries, and tried not to feel guilty. After a few moments of watching the blonde awkwardly try to tape the gauze pads into place, Sirius knelt beside him. He took the tape and gauze and when to work.

"Look...I'm sorry, mate." he mumbled, not meeting the golden eyes that watched him. " I didn't mean to..."

"I'm sorry too." Remus said quietly. He winced when Sirius got around to putting the gauze over his swollen eye.

Sighing, Sirius sat back on his heels. He examined the damage he's inflicted on his friend and suddenly felt a wave of nausea overcome him. This was the man that he'd shared secrets with as a child. The man who'd help him study for his exams even though he never wanted to. This was the man who'd watched over and protected him when he was ill. This is how Sirius repaid all his years of kindness. Now that Remus was sick and upset and needed him, he'd attacked him. Sirius didn't know he could feel so low.

Remus looked over at him as if he was debating with himself. Finally, he leaned over to Sirius and did something Sirius had not been expecting. He kissed him gently on the corner of his mouth. Sirius didn't even flinch away. He simply sighed and turned a little so their mouths were actually meeting. Timidly, Sirius put a hand on Remus' shoulder and pulled him a little closer. Remus sighed and leaned fully into Sirius' touch, making the long haired man smile contently.

So when you've got no other choice

you know you can follow my voice

through the dark turns and noise

of this wicked little town

Oh, it's a wicked little town

Goodbye wicked little town...

Andromeda is Tonks' mother and Narcissa and Bellatrix's sister. Andromeda got blasted off Black family tree.

2- Gideon was an old member of the order of the phoenix