Ai Haibara is the last Miyano, but she soon finds it's not that easy to escape your roots. As Shiho's past comes back to haunt her, everything may depend on the family she never knew. But will she have the courage to pursue the truth?
Miyano
Chapter 1: Unravel
By Kaitou Magician
Ai wished she was wearing a coat. It wasn't that she was cold; in fact, the New Years weather was unseasonably warm. Still her shoulders twitched, wishing for the reassuring motion of hunching down in the stiff fabric, desiring the protection of even a simple disguise.
Normally, the young girl would not give into to such self-indulgence, but, pressed within the crowd of well-wishers heading to the temple, Ai felt horribly exposed. It didn't help that she was also feeling dizzy and off balance.
"Ai-chan, are you alright?" Ayumi asked worriedly. The young girl took Ai's left hand as if to lend her strength. "You're not sick again are you?"
"It's nothing," Ai reassured her with a calm that belied her own unease. "I just have a headache."
"You've been getting headaches a lot recently," Kudo observed, dropping back from his position next to Mouri to give her a piercing look.
"It's nothing," Ai said firmly. If Kudo decided there was some mystery to her headaches that he needed to solve, she could kiss her privacy goodbye. "I've simply been staying up late." Implicit was 'to work on the cure, so back off'.
"Lucky," Kojima chimed in over Ai's left shoulder. "My parents make me go to bed at seven. How unfair." Kojima pouted for a moment before returning his attention to devouring the buns he had bought at a roadside stand.
"That's, that's just because Haibara-kun is so mature," Tsuburaya stammered out, blushing brightly. Only Ai clearly heard him, the chatter and shouts from the crowd threatening to drown out speech entirely.
Overhead, fireworks burst and fizzled against dark sky, and around her the crowd slow plodded towards its common destination. Ensconced within a circle of people she could tentatively call friends, Ai could almost feel safe.
Suddenly, a man shouldered his way through the group, elbowing Kojima and brushing against Ai.
--sadness. frustration.--
Ai winced and stumbled sideways, right into Kudo's grip.
How embarrassing, Ai thought.
"Hey, watch where you're going," Kojima yelled at the man's back, rubbing his head.
"Are you okay, Ai-kun?" Professor Agasa asked worriedly, bending down to peer into her eyes.
"I'm fine," Ai replied shortly, shrugging off Kudo's steadying hands.
Ever since she could remember, she had been able to sense when They were near. It had been painful. She'd had no control as the virulent emotions overwhelmed her, paralyzing her thoughts and body more effectively than pancuronium bromide. However, that had been the extent of her abilities.
Lately, though, she could sometimes feel the emotions of the people around her. It happened at random with no warning and it was beginning to put Ai on edge. She hated feeling not in control.
"Maybe we should go to a less crowded temple, so we can get home faster," Mouri offered gently, smiling encouragingly at Ai. The younger girl was inclined to agree, just because she felt so exposed in the crowd, but something in her rebelled at the suggestion.
"I'll be fine," she insisted firmly.
It would be idiotic to leave now, her mind logically asserted. They had been slowly shuffling forward for hours. Besides, Ayumi had been so excited when she learned they were all going to go together, after believing that she would have to spend New Years alone with her parents out of the country.
Also, the suggestion came from her, a part of her mind whispered. Ai didn't examine the thought too closely. She was afraid to discern the emotion behind it.
After a few minutes of awkward, concerned looks, normality reasserted itself. Ai let the young children's chatter wash over her, listening with only half an ear as they complained about the winter holiday homework and wondered how much money they would receive when they got home. Kudo and Mouri also restarted their conversation about Mouri's upcoming ski retreat with Suzuki. Professor Agasa stepped in to offer his services as babysitter during her trip.
Ai took a deep breath, letting the chill fill her lungs. She had been tired lately, spending late hours in the lab and then going to school. She had hit another roadblock in the cure; it was time to take a break and rest. An overworked mind would never be able to solve APTX. Of course, why it was a poison in the first place was a riddle she--
--hope. --
The emotion was so strong it took Ai's breath away.
--excitement. anticipation.--
"Haibara-kun, what's wrong?" This time it was Tsuburaya who took her hand and tugged her back to reality.
"Nothing," Ai said calmly, feeling winded and shaken. "I just…" She couldn't think of a decent lie. That was far more worrying.
"Maybe we should take you to a doctor," Kudo suggested.
"Because that worked so well with Doctor Araide," Ai snapped back in a sarcastic undertone.
"Ai-kun." The professor sounded worried.
Ai wanted to close her eyes and think--it would only take a moment--and get the situation back under some semblance of control. But closing her eyes would be taken as a sign of weakness, and Ai couldn't afford that.
Kudo was watching her. The professor was watching her. Mouri was watching her. The Detective Boys were watching her. The pressure of their gazes seemed to intensify her headache. Ai froze her facial muscles, refusing to give in to the strain and wince.
Ai quickly ran through her options in her head. Her current behavior could not be calmly excused and brushed off. There was nothing for it. She couldn't lie convincingly as she was now.
Mentally, Ai selected a mask, fit it over her features, and smiled.
"I'm fine." She even managed a cheerful tone. They were harder to convince this time, but Ai nonchalantly brushed off their queries until they gave up, all the while mentally calculating how long she could keep up the façade.
And if Kudo narrowed his eyes at her…well, he was a detective. He had to get things right some of the time.
Buoyed by sarcasm and protected by the mask--inside her mind, a part of Ai curled up and closed her eyes--Ai began to feel hope. She would make it. And if, when she got home, she slept for a few days, Kudo would be too busy spending as much time with Mouri as possible before her trip to notice.
We're on the steps, Ai offered up in nameless prayer; please, just let me make it the rest of the way.
"What are you going to wish for?" Kojima excitedly asked everyone as they got closer.
"That's a secret," Ayumi replied cheerful, wagging her mitten-clad hand him.
To not get shot or captured, Ai thought, only half sarcastic. Yet even her morbid thoughts couldn't detract from the excitement that, despite herself, she was beginning to feel. Ai clapped her mitten-covered hands together to warm herself, feeling the anticipation rising within her. This was her first New Years with people she could consider family and friends. She didn't even try to stop the small smile that quirked up her mouth.
Ai stepped up to the bell, Kudo hovering at her side, over-protective and suspicious as usual. I wish, she began, reaching out to pull the bell rope.
"You really seem into it," Kudo remarked causally, hands clapping together in prayer.
Ai's hand froze, half curled around the rope, in horror.
Hope. Excitement. Anticipation.
A chill went through her. These aren't my emotions.
At the realization, Ai felt something break inside her. It felt like, Ai would try to describe later, thread unwinding from a spool, only it was herself that was falling apart.
She felt Kudo's worry first, since he was closest. There, standing right behind them, was Professor Agasa's concern, the Detective Boys' excitement, and Mouri's contentment. Like a ripple, her mind spread over the crowd's impatience and joy; then, she was beyond the temple's walls and sinking into a city crowded with sentiments.
She could no longer see the rope, overwhelmed by the feelings, enough emotion to drown in…
Something cool grabbed her wrist, and Ai was simply falling into an empty darkness.